DISCLAIMER - Not mine I swear! At least not the characters!!!

A/N - Inspired by my recent adventures in hair dye land.

2x1

"Why are you doing this to me again?" Heero asked the man behind him.

"I've always wanted to play with hair dye." Duo answered.

"So dye your own hair."

"My hair? Are you kidding me?" Duo gripped Heero's hair with both hands and shook his head.

"Ow ow! Whatever! Just get it over with!"

A snicker trickled from Duo's mouth as he opened the box of bleaching solution. He barely skimmed over the instructions before pouring some powder into the bowl and mixing in the liquid.

Letting the mixture sit, Duo then took Heero's hair and clipped it into groups. Heero sat without complaint when Duo would pull his hair too hard and played his gaming system. He was about five sword hits short of killing the mini boss when a crumpling startled him.

"What is that?" He asked jerking his head away from Duo's hands.

Duo pulled him back by his hair. "It's foil."

"Why?"

Duo sighed. "If I put the bleach in without foil then the hair that's bleached will sit on your other hair that I'm not bleaching and bleach it. Get it?"

"No but maybe if you say bleach a few more times…" Heero let it drop when Duo pulled at his hair.

"The foil separates it from the hair I don't want bleached."

Heero watched in the mirror as Duo folded the end of the foil against a comb with a stick jutting off of it. He nestled the foiled comb/stick under a chunk of hair.

"Hold."

"But I'm about to kill-"

"I don't have three hands Heero! Hold."

Heero sighed but reached around to hold onto the teeth end of the comb. Duo mumbled a thanks, dipped a plastic bristled brush in the bleach and began to apply it to the hair that laid on top of the foil. Heero could feel the wet sensation as the bleach touched his scalp.

"Is it supposed to burn?" Heero asked. Duo stopped brushing on the bleach.

"It can. Is it?"

"A little." Heero had just noticed the tingle at his scalp.

"Sorry. I'll be more careful next time." Duo said while he folded the foil into a little square.

"Ow! Yeah, that's my hair Duo. Mind not pulling it out?"

"Pull."

"Please don't!"

"Never mind." Duo smacked the hand that held the comb away and pulled it out from the foil.

"If you're going to be a jerk about it then I'm going to leave." Heero glared at Duo in the mirror.

"And have one section of bright blonde hair?"

"I'll dye it."

"It'll look like shit."

"How would you know? I thought you've never done this before?"

Duo didn't answer; just smiled a wicked smile that made Heero nervous. But nervous or not, Duo had a good point. Heero wouldn't know what to do with hair dye and so settled back down on the bench and let Duo pull at more of his hair.

"Scoot." Duo ordered for the fifth time. Heero's arm was contorted at an awkward angle to hold up the comb/stick (as he was now calling it) as he attempted to move over with the mini bench in tow.

"Why are we doing it in here if it's so small?" Heero asked.

"Where else are we going to do it? I need the linoleum floors so I don't stain anything."

"There's this huge room towards the front of your house called the kitchen. It has linoleum floors and I could see the tv if I was at the right angle."

"Yeah but have you ever heard of anyone dying their hair in the kitchen?"

"Sally. Trowa."

"Well that's their choice. It seems more logical to dye hair where you clean hair. Not where you cook food." The brush in Duo's hands stopped and he began folding again.

"But I'm bored. And hungry."

"Pain is beauty. Pull." Learning early on, Heero pulled the comb out. "I'm almost done anyway. Then it'll have to sit for at least twenty minutes. We can get food then."

Heero sighed and moved himself and the towel bench back when Duo got to the top of his head. His game was long since abandoned and the only thing he had for entertainment now was the stain on Duo's jeans at the hip that looked a little like Dr. J's hook hand. In fact, it opened and closed when Duo shifted his weight.

"Wait. Go back to how you were standing."

"Heero, if I don't finish, your hair is gonna fry."

"Just look." Heero jabbed a finger at Duo's hip. Duo bent over to try and look at it. "It looks like Dr. J's hook." Heero then grabbed Duo's hips and shifted them to the right. "Now they're open." He shifted them back. "Now they're closed."

Duo swatted Heero's hands off of his hips. "Stupid. Let me finish." But he couldn't hide the smile from Heero.

"It did, didn't it?"

"What? Look like Dr. J's hand thing? All I could see was a purple stain that started small and got bigger."

"You saw it."

"Whatever." Duo punctuated with a particularly hard squeeze of hair.

"Ow. I thought you couldn't do it without three hands?"

"The top is easier."

"Yeah right."

"Is it warm enough?" Duo asked as he held his hand under the water in the shower.

"I don't care. Just get it out!"

"Relax."

"You relax. It burns!"

"I am relaxed. Now sit." Duo watched as Heero sat on the floor in front of the tub. "It'll be easier if you take your shirt off."

"And get bleach all over it?"

"I'll help."

"And stretch it out?"

"Just do it." Heero's favorite black shirt was lifted over his head while Duo held the collar open. "Now lean back."

"And how am I supposed to do that?" To lean back, Heero would have to lift his hips and lean over the lip of the tub in an awkward position. Heero struggled into position and tried to get comfortable. Finally Duo straddled Heero and wrapped his arms around him, placing his back halfway over the tub. Heero was left to hold him self up with his legs.

"Now this might hurt a little."

"Not more than the damn burning."

"Is it really that bad?" Duo asked, still straddling Heero and unwrapping the foil. "Oh…" Duo's eyes got wide.

"What?"

"…Shit." Duo swiftly opened the rest of the foil and made a scared face. "Shit." He repeated.

"What?" Heero's annoyance was growing.

"It's… blonde." Duo dropped the scared look and laughed. "Whatever, lets just wash it out."

"Duo! You said it wouldn't be that bad!" Heero yelled at the mirror. Duo flinched in the background.

"Well, it worked. It's definitely bleached."

"It's white! WHITE! I look like a moron!"

"No, we just have to dye over it. We can go to the store and buy some now. I'll do it as soon as we get back."

"You expect me to go out like this?"

"You can wear a hat."

"Or I can cut off your hair and make a wig!" Heero watched as Duo blanched. Remembering who and where he was, he took a deep breath. "Store. Now. And I expect some dinner too."

"We can go through the drive through." Duo gave him a sheepish smile. Heero answered with a wicked smile.

"Or you could cook me a home made meal in the kitchen while my hair dye's. I get the remote."

Duo nodded.

"How about black?" Heero forced, picking up a box of black hair dye.

"It's pointless to bleach before black. It has to be a lighter color. I was thinking red."

"How about brown?" Heero asked through gritted teeth.

"Nah, yours has to be different. Trowa does the whole black streak thing and Sally does the dark brown low lights thing, Quatre has about the blonde you do now and I'm sure you don't want blue or pink or anything."

"Remind me never to let you streak my hair again."

"Ooooh. I like this!" Duo picked up a box. Heero peered over his shoulder to read it.

"Heartbeat?"

"It's red. But not too red. It's like mahogany or auburn."

"Then why don't we get mahogany," Heero picked up a box, "or auburn?" Heero picked up another box.

"Because those are no fun!" The whine in Duo's voice had Heero cringing. "Come on, I like heartbeat! I promise that if anything goes wrong I'll let you dye my hair purple."

Heero had a mental fit behind closed eyes before setting the boxes of other red hair colors back on the shelf. "Fine. Just get it over with."

"The good thing is you don't have to sit you down on your butt and lay on your back. You just have to get on your knees." Duo said.

Duo had test dyed the streaks on top of Heero's head. The two extra boxes of heartbeat were in case of emergency and now was the moment of truth.

Heero was not only red in the hair but in the face as he got down on his knees in front of the tub. Duo bent him over the tub and straddled his back to take out the foil. He was glad Heero couldn't see his face. He rinsed the hair free of the dye.

Heero watched the red dye swirl under his face and wondered aloud why it seemed weird.

"It's weird because of the water. Don't worry about it."

"It looks okay?" Heero asked in all seriousness.

"It's different. But yeah, it's okay."

"That's too vague Duo!" Heero warned.

"I know." Was Duo's simple answer.

"Duo! What's wrong with my hair?"

"Nothing."

"Then why are you being vague?" The silence that filled the bathroom was ominous.

Finally Duo answered in a small voice. "I don't want to dye my hair."

Heero couldn't see Duo's face, still bent over the tub as he was, but Duo sounded dejected.

"Duo?"

"………." Duo moved off of Heero's back.

"Duo what's wrong?" Heero stood after wrapping a towel around his head.

Duo wouldn't meet his eyes and the panic on his face spread to Heero's heart. The steam was removed from the mirror so that Heero could see himself. Slowly, he unwrapped the towel from his head. When he caught a glimpse of his hair, he almost wished he hadn't wiped the steam clear.

"It's pink." He said calmly.

Duo's lip quivered in the reflection as he nodded. Still not meeting Heero's gaze, Duo missed the wicked grin that flashed across Heero's face.

"Come on Duo." Heero's voice was calm. It scared Duo.

"Wh-where are we-we going?" Duo's voice was an octave higher than usual.

"A salon. I don't know how to dye hair."

A strangled sound was heard deep in Duo's throat.

Duo sat in shock while Heero spoke to the hair dresser in private. Every few seconds he would glance back at Duo with a gleam in his eye. After what seemed like hours, Duo was moved to the sinks towards the back of the salon. The woman washing his hair made no attempt to calm him and he knew no amount of pleading would stop her. Heero had a way with words and glares and there was no way out of this.

Next Duo was moved to the main chairs and had a smock draped around his neck. His wet hair hung loose around him and he felt the tightness of his chest as if he were about to cry. Surely Heero wouldn't really do anything to his hair?

After his hair was combed Duo was spun around, so he couldn't see in the mirror what the hairdresser was doing. Heero's feral grin was all he saw before he squeezed his eyes shut.

Snip snip

Duo's eyes shot open. Heero was standing in front of him, watching intently where the woman was cutting his hair.

"Heero!" He strangled out.

Heero ignored him and Duo was left to listen to the dreaded snipping of scissors. Finally the snipping ceased and Duo was escorted to the sink again. He fought to keep his hands at his sides and he stared at the ground, not wanting to know how his hair had turned out.

"Okay. You're all done." The woman said in too cheery a voice.

Duo's face as he was turned toward the mirror had Heero in hysterical giggle fits. He was hunched over in the chair, face contorted in defeated anger. When he saw his reflection, his eyes widened.

"Heero?" He asked incredulously.

"Like it?" Heero asked from beside him, obviously holding in laughter.

"I thought you were going to dye it or cut it all off!"

"It is dyed. And I did get you a trim." Heero answered. "The purple is temporary and should wash out tonight. I asked her to only cut off about two inches. Nothing more."

Duo turned his head left and right taking in the purple streak that twisted in and out of his braid.

"I actually kind of like it." He said in truth.

"If you like it enough, I'll have it put in permanently, but think about it a bit. I wouldn't want to damage your hair without your consent."

"What about your hair?"

Heero ran his hand through his hair then. "Pink, blonde, brown. Makes no difference to me."

"But it looks-"

Heero stopped Duo with a maniacal face. "What? What does it look like?"

"…Like I missed a spot." Duo challenged. Heero spun Duo to face him, placed a hand on each arm rest and leaned in.

"I'll give you one last chance. If you screw up again, I'm going to miss your spot."

Duo swallowed and blushed before coming up with the right thing to say. "I'll try really hard not to miss it."

Heero grinned at that and stood leaving Duo to follow him to the cashier.

"Would you like me to fix your hair sir?" The woman asked Heero. Duo snickered.

"No thanks."

"I wouldn't let my friend do that to my hair. I'll give you a discount." Duo rolled his eyes at her open flirting.

"What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't let him learn from his mistakes? He'll fix it or risk punishment." Heero paid and gave her a large tip for not destroying Duo's hair.

"What the hell?"

"What is it now?"

"Blue! How did it turn blue? It was a bottle of brown!"

"Are you sure you read it right?"

Duo picked up the box and read aloud. "Medium to dark brown. Definitely brown."

"Well just take out the rest."

"What the fuck!"

"What?"

"This one's green!"

"Duo!"

"I'm serious!"

"So am I!"

"But I'm tired!"

"That's the point."

"Fine…"

Duo pulled down Heero's boxers while Heero was still bent over the tub with foil in his hair before pulling his own boxers down. It was the fifth time that night, and after dying hair, having a panic attack that his hair was going to be cut off and dying more hair that came out purple, yellow, orange, red and silver, Duo was exhausted.

Heero, on the other hand, would have any hair color he could if this was the price.

"Do you think they'll ever figure out that we have someone on the inside?"

"Wufei dressed as a woman? No. They would never suspect."

"Don't ever speak of this again."

"I was thinking we could take that outfit out tonight…"

"Shut up woman!"

"But Wufei! That wig went so well with your breasts and padded hips!"

"Just wait Quatre. Tomorrow, if you wake up with multicolored hair…"

"I'll look just like Heero. Now I need to wash Trowa's hair before it fry's."

"Oh Quatre, while you're at it could you get us some drinks?"

"Sure. But could you change the channel to twelve? I have a show on in a few."

"When will dinner be ready?"

"It's in the pan."

"Don't burn it!"

"I'm next!"

"Woman, you already have six colors of brown in your hair!"

"And now I need some blonde."

"It's okay Sally. Just sit in the chair by the fridge. I'll get to it as soon as I stir dinner."