A/N: I love Gossip Girl… but it's too easy to make fun of. :) Also, reviews are all appreciated, even if they're flames! Bring it on! These are parodies of random scenes in Gossip Girl… actually, some of them aren't even scenes, I made some of them up. :) Well, here you go; I hope you find it funny!
Serena: I'M BAAAAACK!
Blair: Go back to whatever hole you crawled out of.
Chuck: I'd like to go back into your hole, if you know what I mean. *wink*
Nate: SERENA'S BACK? Who cares about sex with Blair, LET'S GO SAY HI!
Blair: Are you sure you're not gay?
Nate: Well, I don't know, I do spend a lot of random nights at Chuck's… waking up and not remembering what happened the night before…
Chuck: *whistles innocently* What can I say? I'm Chuck Bass.
Serena: I know for a fact Nate's not gay.
*awkward silence*
Blair: Dafuk?
Nate: I'll tell you now…
Blair: NO! AFTER WE HAVE SEX!
Nate: Yeah… it can't wait.
Blair: Yeah… are you positively sure you're not gay?
Serena: Blair, let's be friends again! I know I left without saying goodbye, stole all your boyfriends and spotlight, and had sex with N- anyway, let's just… pretend that never happened!
Blair: Yeah, too bad, I know all about what you did with Nate. Imma storm out now.
Serena: Shit, but Blair, I have such a good soul and heart now!
Blair: It's ok, I'll probably forgive you later in this episode.
Dan: Stupid brunch. Screw the Upper East Side. Sure, I've been stalking Serena for a couple years now, but… I never knew she was so terrible!
Serena: I'll always be a part of the Upper East Side!
Dan: And I'm from BROOKLYN, so I'll never fit in with you!
Vanessa: YEAH! WHO CARES!
Serena: You have hair, clearly you do.
Dan: Like I said, Upper East Side sucks. I'LL NEVER FIT IN. Even though I go to the same school, wear expensive jackets and dated Serena.
Rufus: You said it, son! It sucks unless it's the Van Der Woodsen's, if you know what I mean! *wink*
Dan: Right now, I hate Serena!
Serena: Don't worry; we'll probably be together again. Sorry, Vanessa!
Vanessa: It's all good; I've got my Man-Bangs over here!
Nate: Nah, Serena's wearing something shiny… I LOVE HER!
Vanessa: Dafuk?
Serena: Dear god.
Nate and Dan: IT'S ON!
Nate: Never mind, I LOVE JENNY, SHE'S BLONDER!
Vanessa: Dafuk? REVENGE!
Dan: NOT MY SISTER!
Nate: WAIT, BLAIR IS… rich!
Vanessa: Dafuk?
Nate: Wait, Vanessa! You're more ethnic!
Vanessa: Dafuk? Actually, works for me!
Dan: YAY, I get Serena all to myself!
Serena: I thought you hated me…
Dan: That was before I found out someone else liked you.
Serena: Makes sense.
Aaron: Remember me? I'm Cyrus Rose's son, Blair's stepbrother?
Cyrus Rose: I have a son?
Jenny: I'm super cool!
Eric: You are!
Blair: …right. SKANK!
Jenny: Oh, I see, you have a little crush on me. How adorable… NOT INTERESTED, BITCH.
Eric: I told you I was gay…
Jenny: Actually, I was talking to Blair.
Gossip Girl: I'm going to pop in at the just the right moment to ruin all the Upper East Sider's lives. I almost feel like –A… nah, I'm imagining things. XOXO, Gossip Girl. P.S. Here's a tip- if you want to keep your romances secret, don't kiss right in front of everyone.
Mrs. Carr: *totes flirting with Dan* I'm totes innocent.
Dan: *totes flirting with Mrs. Carr* I know, I would never do it with a teacher!
Dan: *mumbles* Unless it was you…
Serena and Mrs. Carr: What?
Dan: Nothing.
Nate: Serena! I love you!
Serena: I'm dating Aaron! Wait, no, I'm dating Gabriel… wait, no, I'm dating Dan… wait no, I'm dating… I FORGET!
Nate: *looks hopeful* Maybe… I'm dating you?
Serena: LET'S GO WITH THAT! *makes out with him*
Serena: I killed someone!
Serena's mom: At least you didn't make a sex tape!
Blair's mom: UNATTENTIVE PARENTING, WHOOT! *high fives*
Chuck: I…
Blair: Go on…
Chuck: Love…
Blair: Keep going, you're almost there…
Chuck: Y- SEX!
Blair: That's the 10th time you've done that! I HATE YOU, I'LL NEVER LOVE YOU AGAIN!
Chuck: *sadface*
Blair: …well, you know, for three episodes or so.
Blair: Do my dirty work for me, Dorota!
Chuck: I'd like to do some dirty work on you, if you know what I mean. *wink*
Dorota: I don't think so!
Blair: *demon eyes* DO IT OR YOU'LL NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY! MY KNIFE WILL CUT YOU SO FAST, YOU WON'T EVEN SEE IT COMING!
Chuck: I wouldn't mind seeing you coming, if you know what I mean. *wink*
Dorota: MISS BLAIR, I'LL DO WHATEVER IT IS! AND ANYTHING ELSE!
Blair: *normal* I love your headband, Dorota!
Rufus and Vanessa: *have weird sexual tension*
Dan: *walks in* …is this a bad time?
Vanessa: …
Rufus: …
Dan: Well this is awkward.
THE END. (for now!)