A/N #1:

Rating: This fanfic is absolutely, without a doubt, rated M for MATURE AUDIENCES. There is a very detailed, graphic sexual scene within this fanfic in Chapter Two, so if that is NOT your thing, please do not read.

Spoiler Alert: If you have not played Dragon Age: Origins or Dragon Age II, and if you have not romanced Alistair in ANY way, there are spoilers ahead for you folk, so please read at your own risk.

He sat, leaning against his desk and stared at the bed. They had never lain in an actual bed together, only the bedroll they had used in camp. Though, since the Blight had ended, he pictured how it would be and feel again almost every night. He hadn't seen her since he wed Anora, since she decided his future as King of Ferelden. She knew all along she was an elf and would never be able to marry a human prince and be queen, it was an impossible possibility. Kiisu; the elf rogue he had fallen in love with. He sighed and closed his eyes. Sometimes love isn't enough, but oh how he wished it were.

XXX

The sky was clear and the stars shown bright that night in the camp. The crickets chirped, birds sang their song in the distance and the camp fire crackled; everything seemed perfect, was perfect, and he couldn't wait any longer.

She was sitting next to the campfire, her long chocolate hair curling around her face as she moved slightly in a failed attempt to be comfortable against the wooden log she leaned on. Her eye caught his and she smiled, her cheeks turning a flushed red before turning back towards the fire, embarrassed.

He took a deep breath, stood, and walked over to her slowly. As he walked up to her, she turned and stared up at him. He held out his hand which she softly took and stood to face him.

"All right," He began, "I really… don't know how to ask you this."

An amused smile played across her mouth and she cocked her head at him. "Are you sweating?"

"No. I- I, uh, mean yes." He fumbled with his words, unable to think of how to say what he wanted to ask. His mouth suddenly felt so dry and he swallowed hard. "I mean, I'm a little nervous… sure. Not that this is anything bad, or frightening, or… well, yes." He sighed, 'a little nervous?' Who was he kidding? "Oh, how do I say this? You think it would be easier but every time I'm around you I feel as if my head's about to explode. I- I can't think straight!" He threw his hands into the air in frustration. Why couldn't he just say the words?

Eyebrow raised, she stared at him, hopelessly confused. "Oh? Thanks a lot."

"I don't mean it like that! I mean…" He groaned. "All right, let me start over."

He took a deep breath and stared into her forest green eyes, feeling as if he would melt into her at any moment.

"Here's the thing; being near you makes me crazy… but I can't imagine being without you. Not… ever."

He swallowed hard again; it was now or never, no holding back any longer.

"I don't know how to say this another way… I want to spend the night with you. Here, in the camp. Maybe this is too fast, I… don't know, but I know what I feel."

He could tell the seriousness of his voice surprised her as her dark eyes searched his. Her expression was unreadable; something that often happened when she was around him, something that never failed to fascinate him.

Minutes passed before she broke the silence that had enveloped them both. "You want to spend the night? Are you sure?"

He nodded. "I wanted to wait for the perfect time, the perfect place, but when will it be perfect? If things were, we wouldn't even have met. We sort of… stumbled into each other. And despite this being the least perfect time," he smiled softly at her, "I still found myself falling for you in-between all the fighting and everything else."

He stared at the ground, unsure if he was truly able to get across how he felt. He didn't want to come right out and admit he loved her – even if he did – he was terrified it'd be too soon.

"I really don't want to wait anymore," he admitted, "I- I've never done this before… you know that." He moved closer to her, just close enough to touch her.

"I want it to be with you, while we have the chance… In case…" He trailed off, and suddenly the realization of the situation hit him harder than he expected. He felt a familiar pain stir in the deepest part of his chest, something that reminded him how quickly their lives could be ended: Duncan's death.

When his eyes met hers once again, she smiled that soft smile that had always entranced him. "No need to say anything else. I agree."

He couldn't take it any longer and he quickly moved forward, pushing his body against hers. Their lips met and the entire world seemed to fade away around them. He pulled away, breaking the kiss and bent forward, pressing his arm into her knees from behind. She fell into his waiting arms, willingly and he carried her to his tent. They were both very aware their entire group was watching and had seen, but neither cared.

That night, they lay naked in each other's arms, sometimes talking, sometimes making love all over again. He admitted he loved her after their bodies could physically take no more and she had curled next to him to sleep, laying her head against his chest as she listened to his heartbeat. Before the realm of dreams captured her, she reached her hand to his face and gently touched his cheek. "I love you, too," She admitted, "and I always will."

XXX

A knock at the door roused him from his memories and he cleared his throat, straightening himself before saying "Come in." Tegan entered a few seconds later and gave him a hearty smile, to which Alistair could only scowl at.

"Majesty, everything is packed and ready when you are. We should leave before nightfall, so we can catch the boat in time. I'm sure your queen misses you."

Alistair sighed. "Tegan, you're always so formal; I've asked you countless times to not call me 'Majesty'! And the only thing she misses about me is the 'having someone there to boss around' part."

Teagan just smiled and awaited orders from his King.

"All right, all right… Give me a few moments to collect my things and I shall meet you outside." He said with a sneer.

Nodding, Teagan turned and left the room, quietly shutting the door behind him.

One week ago they had landed in Kirkwall in hopes of meeting the Champion, Katerina Hawke, and asking her for much needed help in Ferelden. They had rented a room inside The Hanged Man and toured the city, meeting various nobles and alienage folk, passing time until they were able to meet with the Champion.

Six days had passed before he was finally able to receive an audience with her, though he had the not-so-enjoyable time of meeting Knight-Commander Meredith first. He had had a nice little chat with the Commander and then he was able to speak to the Champion, but as Alistair expected, she was unable to offer any help at the time because of the escalating war between the Templar's and the Mage's; she had to stay in Kirkwall. After a small chitchat concerning the war and Orlais, Alistair and Teagan bid farewell to the Champion and returned to Lowtown to make preparations to depart for Ferelden the next day.

Alistair spun around in his wooden chair to face his desk. Scattered atop were papers of various sorts, an ink well, and the silver amulet of his mother's that she had found during their travels in Redcliffe and given to him as a gift. He had always kept it with him since it was returned to him, for the fact it was his mothers and the plain simple fact that Kiisu was the one that had reunited him with it. He clutched the necklace to his heart and sighed, putting the chain around his neck before he stood. He grabbed his small pack he had brought with him and made his way out the door, down the stairs of The Hanged Man, and out into the dusky night of Lowtown.

The cool night air felt refreshing as it engulfed him when he stepped out the door, washing over and soothing him of the hot, stuffy air that was inside the tavern. He breathed in deep and filled his lungs, hoping the air would somehow magically wash away all the pain and despair he felt, but to no avail.

He looked around for Teagan but he wasn't anywhere to be found. Alistair shrugged; figuring he probably got tired of waiting and headed to the docks. He turned the corner to head in that direction when he slowed, seeing ahead of him a dark silhouette seemingly running towards him. As light fell over the dark shadow, he recognized the face to be that of Hawke's, the Champion of Kirkwall he had spoken to just the day before.

She skidded to a stop in front of him, bent over and rested her hands on her upper thighs, panting from loss of breath.

"Hawke? If you're trying to catch the boat, the docks are in the other direction!" He jested, a smile on his face.

She eyed him oddly and he awkwardly scratched the short stubble on his face.

"I came looking for you. I ran because I thought you may have already caught the boat back to Ferelden and I was afraid I may have missed you."

Now it was his turn to eye her oddly. "You were looking for me? Uh oh, I have a bad feeling about this."

"What?"

"Uh, nothing, you said you were looking for me?"

She stood up straight and stared at him. What an odd man. "After we talked yesterday, it occurred to me you had another Warden with you during your travels and fight against the Blight."

His ears perked up, she had his interest now. "Yes, what of it?"

"I talked to my companions, Varric in particular, and he told me that the Warden who was with you during the Blight; she had been seen in Kirkwall recently. I assumed you didn't know, and since you were already here in Kirkwall, I figured you'd want to see her if she is still in the city."

She's here… after all this time, after all these years; I may get a chance to tell her the truth… He sighed. But what if she had already left?

"How recent?"

"She arrived on the boat this afternoon, apparently here on Warden-Commander business. From what I've learned, she was last seen in Hightown."

He smiled in spite of himself. She had become a Commander, after all. "Thank you, Hawke. This information means a lot to me."

She winked at him. "So I've heard."

He eyed her suspiciously again and was about to ask what she meant when a tall elf with white hair walked up behind her. She turned to him, nodded, and then turned back to Alistair.

"Forgive my shortness, your Majesty, but Kirkwall troubles await. I wish you good luck." And with another wink, she turned and disappeared into the night with her elf companion. Or lover, Alistair would have guessed by the way they looked at each other; a look all too familiar to him.

He was about to turn and once again, head in the direction of the docks to tell Teagan that they would not be departing Kirkwall tonight and would be remaining in the city for a short time longer, when Teagan himself strolled out of the darkness.

"What is it with everyone finding me tonight?" Alistair exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air.

Teagan cocked his head, confused. "Majesty?"

"Oh, nothing. Where did you disappear to?"

"I went to the docks to wait for you, after awhile I assumed you were still here so I came back and… here you are. You just couldn't leave the good ole' ale behind, huh?"

"That's me, the drunken King of Ferelden!" He snickered, and then thought about what he had just said. "Anora would whip me herself if she heard me say that."

Teagan gave a hearty laugh. "Shall we head to the docks? The boat won't wait for us."

"Change of plans, we're staying in Kirkwall for awhile longer." Before Teagan could protest, Alistair raised his hand. "I have more business to attend to; matters of the heart. Don't wait up for me!"

With that, Alistair was the one to now disappear into the night, walking proud as he headed for Hightown.