Escaping Expectations
Chapter 1- Preface
Summary: Bella is crumbling away from the standards her parents set for her. Always being labeled never good enough, Bella is struggling to accept herself. She has escaped to college and met a heartbreakingly handsome young man. Bella's adventure in overcoming her demons, with a green eyed angel guiding her way.
Disclaimer- All rights go to Stephanie Meyer, I only own the plot.
Bella POV:
The cool pillow engulfed my pounding head and I buried myself further. It was daily occurrence now and I welcomed the familiar feeling. My mother's harsh voice became faint as my ears were covered by the fabric. Everything faded away and I felt utter bliss.
If only this happened every five minutes of my life.
I sighed to myself as I heard my mother stomp up the stairs. This is the fifth tantrum she had today, not that I was surprised. This time I think she was angry at what I ate for dinner. Apparently, I wasn't allowed to eat any red meat because I would get too fat for my graduation gown.
I rolled my eyes, of course Renee Swan could not stand a fat daughter. My "mother" is what you call a perfectionist. Not a hair out of place, perfect posture, intelligent and lady-like.
"ISABELLE MARIE SWAN! How dare you ignore me? I can't believe I have you're this worthless, all you have to do is listen for once in your life," Renee exclaimed as if everything was my fault. In her eyes, it probably was.
My iPod played in the background and one of my favorite Avril songs came on. I hummed appreciatively at the lyrics and related immediately.
"ARE YOU SERIOUS? Turn this trash off, this is what's ruining you! God, can you do anything right Isabella? At this rate you'll never reach Tanya's standard." Renee huffed and left the room with a slam.
Ouch, that stung. My heart squeezed so tight in my chest, I felt the room closing in. I felt wetness gathering on my eyes and I sighed.
With every fiber of my being, I hate being compared to Tanya Denali.
Tanya was my "oh so perfect" cousin. Beautiful, tall model physique with strawberry blonde hair and stormy grey eyes. The epitome of beauty in my mothers eyes. Not to mention that Tanya was a tough cookie with brains. She was annoying and fake but my mother found her charming.
Renee wanted me to become exactly what Tanya is, in her eyes perfection. She trained me like a dog and treated me like one too. Not a daughter, but a pet groomed to perfection. I was merely another trophy on her cabinet.
I was the complete opposite of Tanya and my mother despised that. Tanya wore stylish, designer clothes and I wore the clothes my dad could afford. She drove a classy Mustang and I drove a beat up Ford. She was petty, annoying, and a huge flirt. Tanya knew she was beautiful and it was annoying to see her abuse it. I, on the hand, had plain mahogany hair with natural highlights. I liked the color but it wasn't the blonde bombshell look my mom adores. My big light brown eyes don't fit under that category either.
Basically, Tanya and I were polar opposites and Renee wanted me to be just like her. I had the intelligence, I even beat Tanya's record on the mile on the track team. I just didn't have the look and personality of the blonde bombshell. My mom can't get over the blonde hair, she wants me to dye my hair to exactly that color.
All I want to do is listen to music and wander the world. I want to enjoy my life without always being compared and standardized. I don't want to be this or that, I just want to be Bella. Not gonna happen though, I'll never be good enough to be accepted.
I sighed as I let a few tears trail down my cheek. I should be used to this, I should be strong but there's only so much a person can take. I turned off my lamp and crawled in a fetus position. My blanket curled up around me and my pillow cushioning my head. I felt exhaustion creep up to me and engulfed me into darkness.
⎡ Escaping Expectations ⎦
I hummed in delight as I sipped my coffee, it was my savior. My mom woke me up at the ass crack of dawn to get ready for my graduation. Honestly, I think she cared more about it then I did. I wasn't even excited about the fact that I'm the valedictorian, it was just another title to strengthen my mother's perfectionist personality. Of course Tanya had been the valedictorian last year so it didn't really matter.
Yep that's me, Isabella Swan, constantly living in the shadow of her perfect cousin.
I rubbed my temples and tried to expel those thoughts from my head. Today was about the future, it opened doors to the freedom I craved. Smiling wistfully, I reread my speech for the ceremony. The message was hopefully supposed to give everyone inspiration and drive for the future.
I couldn't wait to go to college. To my mother's cruel delight, I had managed to get into Dartmouth. Sure, I was proud of the achievement but I worried for my father. I don't know where he was pulling out the money to pay for an Ivy League school. I would've been fine going to the University of Alaska but my mother had wanted me to follow Tanya's footsteps.
Honestly, I wanna make my own path and make my own steps. I don't want to conform to someone else's achievements.
The only good thing coming out of Dartmouth is the distance from Forks. I was counting down the days until I packed my shit and headed off to independence. My mother's nagging would no longer bother me every second of the day.
"ISABELLA GET UP HERE! Your makeup needs to be done and we still have to clean up." My mother sneered at me from the doorway.
One day, I want to just drink my coffee in peace without my mother parking orders from every direction. Add that to the list of shit I do once I'm in college. I plan to make everything come true, I just prayed my roommate wasn't annoying. I sighed and pushed away my thoughts. Time to deal with my darling mother's torture. I can feel myself mentally roll my eyes and choke myself.
⎡ Escaping Expectations ⎦
My dress actually made me feel pretty. It clung to my slim and curvy figure. Not going to lie, my body was in very nice shape from all those years in track. There were two sparkly silver straps coming up from the bust and wrapping around my neck. The back was this beautiful lace design complete with pearl buttons. The top was bustier than anything I have ever put on. I was only a cup C but the push up corset worked wonders.
I loved my dress but I have nightmares just staring at the shoes my mother put out. The death traps practically reached for the sky, how the hell would my body weight be supported by that skinny heel? I was in silent prayer begging that I wouldn't trip on the stairs.
"Isabella stop moving! I swear to all things holy, let me just put this fake lash on." Renee screeched. I hate fake lashes with a burning passion.
"Mom, can we not put it on. I'd feel more comfortable without that shit poking my eye." My mother's eyes narrowed and her harpy mouth was ready to attack. We heard shuffling come up the stares and I flipped my head to the doorway.
Woah, my dad was actually here for once in my life.
I internally laughed bitterly, of course that's the first thought I had. Our relationship was awkward but I'd rather put up with him than the vulture you call my mother. Charlie sometimes made me feel insecure but hey, at least I'm not compared to Tanya every second of the day.
"She looks uh great Renee, we don't want those things bothering her when she's saying her speech." Renee huffed in defeat at Charlie's statement.
I fidgeted in my dress as my dad awkwardly smiled at me. I think he was trying to stutter out a compliment but it wasn't working out too well. It was expected from a person like Charlie, I think that's the first time I saw him in weeks. He was always working odd hours to tend to my mother's extravagance. The corners of my lip upturned slightly and I nodded to my dad in thanks for his sort of compliment.
One last look into the mirror I was ready to go. Dare I say, I actually looked really attractive. Well, as attractive as a plain Jane can get. My eyes were done in a nice neutral ombre and my eyeliner complimented my chocolate swirls well. My eyebrows were done in a nice arch and my mascara made my lashes look nice. My heart-shaped lips adorned a mauve color which I loved. I was blessed with good skin so I didn't have to worry too much about facial products.
I looked at my parents and I rolled my eyes. Charlie was fidgeting with his tie and trying to cuff his tuxedo, Renee was applying last minute make up. My darling mother always had to look over the top, even if it meant stealing her daughter's spotlight. She pouted in her mirror and smirked at herself. I wanted to bang my head repeatedly, was that really the person who birthed me?
"Well, let's go and get this show on the road." I sarcastically exclaimed. My mother strutted out and my dad awkwardly followed. I shut the lights and locked the door. This was bound to be interesting.
I'm not even excited about my graduation, I'm just looking forward to leaving this place.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed the chapter! The next chapter should come sometime next week.. A review, favorite, or follow would be appreciated. Thanks for giving this story a chance, who knows? Maybe I'll have a chapter out sooner than later if the feedback is nice. :-)
Yours Truly,
Nymphet D.