This was a completely random thought that came to mind, I don't doubt Tony would have perhaps once or twice thought about suicide, so this came about as a really angsty piece I wanted to write.
His head lolls to the side resting on his shoulder, empty bottle slipping from his fingers crashing haphazardly to the floor in a chaotic mess.
Breathing slows down and hitches as his body absorbs that which shouldn't be there, nausea spreads from the pit of his stomach to consume his entire being.
He closes his eyes and forces back the bile, he cannot fail now.
Slowly he opens his eyes and has trouble focussing, it's happening too fast, too fast and he's terrified, he thinks.
His vision falters imagining things which cannot be there, she, she is definitely not there. She cannot be running toward him as his mouth parts slightly to allow a shallow breath to escape.
He cannot be seeing her dropping to her knees and picking up the bottle with a horrified look on her face.
'Oh god, what have you done?'
Her voice is miles away yet he is completely aware as she pulls his weakening body against her while her fingers dial an unknown number.
'Stay with me,' she pleads with such intensity it hurts.
His eyes try to focus on her as tears slip down her cheeks while she cries into the Blackberry against her ear.
'Hurry please,' she cries finally hanging up and letting the phone drop beside her.
He wants to wipe her tears away but his mind and body cannot communicate anymore so instead he forces his last threads of focus on her beautiful face trying to memorise each and every colour, line and scent as she sobs uncontrollably against him.
Her cheek crashes into his and he feels the wetness there, he feels the life slowly slipping away from him, slowly darkness replaces the light and her touch feels fainter than he cares to admit.
Yes, he's terrified now, almost regretting what he's done but more than that he regrets leaving her behind, if only he had told her, there were so many time he could have said it, he could have told her he loves her. He could have. But not now. Not anymore.
'Just hold on Tony, they're nearly here.'
Her voice breaks through his reverie, it doesn't matter, he wants to say, it's too late, but the words won't come now, it is too late, he was too late. She wasn't meant to see this.
His eyes slip closed finally feeling the ease of the world slipping off of his shoulders.
'No, no, no, no Tony, stay with me, please!'
Her voice is much louder now, closer to him, still holding him in her arms, still hoping that he would stay.
He knows this is the end he deserves and nothing more, he knows this and yet it's so hard. His own tears finally fall as all inhibition breaks away from him and he cries.
He cries until it's over, now comes the peace he thinks, the peace from the little white bottle.
He thinks everything will be ok now, until he thinks no more.
So that was it, please let me know how you think it went :)
Excelsior!