Honoka glowers menacingly at her homework, begging to be done. She is trying to focus, even with the noises and ruckus her friends are making right now. The numbers printed across the page are starting to look more like alien alphabets. Even though she's supposed to be used to the dumb antics and life trials she's learned to endure with in her life, the situation and the hellish being called math homework are starting to drive her insane.
"I hereby announce our first meeting in assisting Honoka's glorious teenage romantic comedy love life," Niko declares to the table, standing tall and proud and confident, "or lack thereof." Hanayo and Rin give out a round of applause while the others simply stare at the leader with pity in their eyes.
"Hey, I resent that!" Honoka winces, looking up from the jumbled mess that is her calculus homework.
Niko bangs her rolled up math notebook to the table, dangerously near Honoka's cellphone. Honoka suffers a pseudo-heart attack."Rin, a brief explanation of the situation, please."
Rin rises from her seat, hands on her sides and her back straightened, adopting a military-esque pose, "We've noticed how Honoka-chan seems to be troubled over something, nyaa!"
"Troubled by you people, you meant." Maki retorts. Niko knocks the girl with her newly weaponized math notebook.
Rin continues, "Judging by how scattered her brains are for the past few weeks and the longing looks some has witnessed from her towards a certain maiden, this calls for investigation, nyaa!" Niko givesher a thumb up, and motions the girl to sit back in her seat.
"To put it simply," Niko coughs, adjusting her voice to sound like a drill sergeant, then turns to Honoka, "you are in love," she points to the frowning girl with her notebook, "but unfortunately, you can't get the girl you like to like you."
"How tragic!" Hanayo wails, wiping a few droplets of tears from the edge of her eyes, earning a groan from Maki. Niko whacks Maki in the head with her math notebook. Maki shoots her a nasty look, teeth gritted.
"And that is why I have gathered all of you here, as this is a super important discussion."
Eri laughs dryly, Nozomi begins to cackle slyly, Maki feigns a mocking yawn, and Honoka secretly plans an escape route to the library with her homework in tow.
"Now, commence, Project: Sonoda-Kousaka Alliance Nudging Kousaka!" Niko says with a voice louder than before, apparently proud of the name she has bestowed upon the project, as cringe-worthy it actually is.
"Project...'skank'?" Eri cocks an eyebrow. Niko pounds her notebook-slash-mace to Eri's head.
Honoka decides it's time for her to step in. "And how will this help my, err, glorious teenage one-sided romantic comedy love life?"
"Of course, Niko here has prepared a marvelously-crafted plan to tie your red string of fate with hers, starting with information gathering."
"You're not going to ask her straight-out whether she likes me or not, right." Honoka gapes in horror, blood drained from her face.
"Nah, we'll sneakily approach the subject."
"But—"
This time Nozomi stands up from her seat, hands clasped in front, "Ah, yes, we understand your raging, uncontrollable desire to get under Umi's skirt," she sends Honoka an impish smile fresh from the kitchen of the deepest pit of Hell itself and Honoka shivers in reflex, "but love is all about patience."
"No. No."
Niko searches her bag and pulls out a radio transmitter, and Honoka has an idea where this is going and she's not going to like it, "Kotori is with her right now. This radio here," she shoves the radio for everyone to see, "is connected to the one Kotori is holding. We're tuning in to their conversation."
"Oh, ooooh," Rin claps her in the back, "cool! It's like we're some kind of undercover agents!"
Honoka rests her head on the top of the wooden table and wonders if it's possible for her to change school for a day.
Honoka is only here because without her supervision she fears for her actually-not-that-much-of-a-secret crush will not only be known to the girl she likes, but the entire school body. Considering the chance of Umi liking her back is nearly non-existent, "Project: SKANK" screams failure and the destruction of any self-confidence she has build for years of crushing over the aptly-nicknamed cold maiden. Also, humiliation on her part.
Right now they are sitting still on their seats, gazes locked onto the walkie-talkie placed in the center of the table. Each of them resisting the urge to lean forward due to the suspense and excitement. Honoka is the only one thoroughly not excited at her incoming doom at all.
The radio makes some static noises and everyone jump from their seats. Niko gripped the rolled up notebook tightly, and Honoka mentally notes that the notebook used to look not as worn-out as it is now. "It's starting!"
"Umi-chan, Umi-chan, can I ask you something?" Honoka notices the voice as Kotori's.
"Is something the matter, Kotori? I mean, sure, but you look really…serious, right now."
"Sneakily approach the subject! Sneakily." Niko shouts at the walkie-talkie and Kotori makes a yelping sound. Honoka pities the poor girl.
"Um, Umi-chan—"
It's okay, Honoka, she encourages herself, sneakily.
"—what do you think of Honoka-chan? Like, um, do you…like her?"
"WHICH PART OF THAT WAS SNEAKY?" Honoka snaps, banging her fists on the table, oblivious of how she nearly crushed her phone with her own hands. Kotori makes another yelping sound as she hears Honoka's yell crystal clear through the walkie-talkie.
"Calm down Honoka, you're being impatient." Eri lectures her while Rin motions her to sit back down.
"OH, SHEESH, MIRROR PLEASE—"
"Ehh? Why so sudden, Kotori…" Honoka stops dead on her rant about the innocence of a girl's crush and the degrading moral of humanity as soon as she picks up Umi's voice.
"Um! Just curious!"
"Honoka is…a friend? Of course I like her. The three of us have been friends since forever, right? Although…if I must say, she's…"
Honoka gulps. Rin's eyes are narrowed like a cat peering to its prey. Hanayo flutters in her seat. Eri's lips are pursed. Maki clings to Niko in an effort to calm herself down. Niko is not amused. Nozomi is amused at the others' reactions.
"She's…a slacker! Lazing and goofing around at any time possible, she's truly NOT an example of how a leader should be! She lacks discipline!"
There was a sound akin to a glass cracking before shattering into pieces. Everyone in the room quickly turns their head to the one and only Kousaka Honoka, master of heartbreaks.
"O, woe is me," Honoka deadpans, "how a statement can fracture the heart of a pure maiden!"
Niko racks her brain to find something consoling before she settles with, "Our condolences."
Honoka stands up from her seat with her school bag slung over. She swears she heard a sizzling sound of headache from the back of her skull. "I'm going home! I – I've had enough!" She gives up trying to hold the tears that were threatening to burst, and hurriedly scurries out of the room, leaving trails of emo tears behind. A sickening silence kicks in.
"Well, duh, lessons learned: do not trust someone like Niko-chan to get their hands on your love life." Maki throws in her comment which earns another one of Niko's now legendary whacks. "Ugh, put that thing down already!"
"And that's why you're still single," Niko shrugs with an insulting lopsided smirk curving her lips, "but it's okay, someone as patient as me, the wise Niko-nii, will kindly take your hand even when you're ripe and old and still unmarried and lonely as ever!"
"Oh you –"
Nozomi shushes the two. "Please, spare us your lovers' quarrel – "
"I'm not her lover!" "Who're you calling lovers?!"
" – as the show has yet to be over." She side-eyes the walkie-talkie. Niko and Maki quickly clamp their mouth shut.
"But…even so, I must say, at times…Honoka is rather dependable. I guess she's just the last-minute kind of person. Don't you think so, Kotori?"
"Um, yup! You really do love Honoka-chan, don't you, Umi-chan~?"
"H-here it comes!" "Nyaaa!" "I wonder just how heartbreaking this story can get…" "Don't say that, Nozomi!"
"Ahaha, please, enough with the jokes already, Kotori. The answer is obvious, isn't it? Of course I don't."
Notes: [1] A multi-chaptered fic by me, featuring the "ship that no one ships", HonoUmi.
[2] HonoUmi aside, this fic will be mostly about Honoka. I dunno, just in the mood of writing her.
[3] This chapter is inspired by FT Island's "I Will". Real catchy. Give the song a listen when you're free.
[4] Next chapter will have a lot of NikoMaki in it. Please look forward to it!
[5] Thanks for reading this crap. Reviews are appreciated!