-1"Omg! Omg! Omg!" shouted a boy name Kaz to his friend Tom.
"Wtf is it u noob?" asked Tom.
"U just got teh code 2 go 2 Chaotic!"
"Wtf u fag Chaotic is only a onlyn TCG not a reel plase. Stop smokin teh pot in the mornin."
"Stfu and entr teh code!"
Tom enters the code in his scanner. Nothing happened.
Unsatisfied, Tom yelled "omfg u weer wrong!"
"O rly?" Kaz said with a smirk.
-
Meanwhile, in another dimension, Tom suddenly appeared in a flash.
"Omfgwtf where m I?" pondered the confused boy.
"U r in Chaotic u dumass" responded a floating robot "now gtfo of heer and go battl ur opponent."
"K."
So Tom went inside a large, dome-like arena to have his very first match in Chaotic. Inside there was another player waiting for him.
"Bout tym u got heer, bitsh" said the other player.
"Stfu noob!" shouted Tom. "I wil pwn u!"
"Playr Tom wil go up agnst playr Sam" announced a computer voice. "Hury up and get this fukin ovr with alrdy!"
The two players used nearby machines to set up their decks.
"Maxxor attaxs Takinom!" Tom declared his first move. Suddenly the indoor arena became a winter wasteland and the players became humanoid monsters! "Omfg I'm rly Maxxor! And ur a transvestit lol!"
The now female player gritted her teeth and replied "u stfu! Bein a tranny Chaotic playr has itz advantiges cuz u can touse urself with ur new bodi. But now is not teh tym cuz I m gona keel u!"
Takinom immediately flew forward with her claws up front. She slashed Maxxor across the face and managed to get Maxxor's right eye.
"OMGOMGOMGOMG!!!" screamed Tom-Maxxor in total pain. "U CLAWD MY FUKIN EYE U FUKIN WHOR! WTF IS WRONG WITH U?!?!"
"Dont b sush a babi" Sam-Takinom said calmly "ur eye wil b bak 2 norml aftr teh matsh is ovr."
"Thn letz finich this!"
Maxxor quickly grabbed Takinom by the throat. Before she could react, Maxxor used his strength to easily break her neck. He tossed then tossed her off the side of a steep hill and watched the lifeless body land on some jagged rocks with a sickening thud.
With the monstrous creature victorious, the landscape formed back into the flat arena and the players alive and unharmed.
"Playr Tom haz 1 teh matsh" announced the computerized voice. "Woop dee doo I rly dont giv a rats ass."
"I pwnd u gud fagot!" Tom spoke in victory. "I cant wyat 2 tel Kaz bout this!"
But then he realized something, how DOES he get back? Tom wanders the land of Chaotic with a feeling of distress in his mind.
"I heer ur lookin 4 a way 2 get out of Chaotic" said a suspicious-looking boy with an accent, British perhaps.
"Do u no how 2 get outa heer u homo?" asked Tom.
"Sur" the boy answered, "al u gota do is use ur scanr dumass! Heer, let me help u with that."
The teen took Tom's scanner, pressed a few buttons on it, and handed it back with a smirk.
"Thanx bitsh" Tom said before warping away.
Tom reappeared in another location, but it looked nothing like home or Chaotic.
Tom grunted "that basturd lyed 2 me! Wheer teh fuk am I now?"
The totally lost Tom traveled this strange new world in hopes of finding his way out. Instead, he finds an ugly monster taking a dump!
"Dud, thats gros" frowned the now-scarred-for-life boy.
His thoughts were interrupted when he was pushed behind some really tall grass. Pinning him down was a rather attractive girl bearing a nice rack as well.
"M I gona get layd?" Tom asked the girl hopefully.
She responds "fuk no, perv! Im heer on u cuz u weer allmost got pwned! Dont u no anythin bout Perim?"
"Perim? Is this weer I m cuz sum retard sent me heer."
"Rly? Wel, in that cas Ill tel u in Perim teh monstrs r reel and u can scan them 4 ur dek. Now if u excus me im gona go scan teh monstr."
The girl takes her scanner out and aims it at the pooping monster. The monster was scanned and a card of the monster was shown on the scanner's screen.
The girl whispered "woot I scand teh monstr! Now to gtfo of heer befor…"
A loud splash was heard and both the humans and the monster turned to see a sea serpent-like creature jump out from a nearby lake.
"Nauthilax u basturd!" the sea creature shouted towards the monster. "4 teh last fukin tim I told u this is Lake Ken-I-Po, not Lake Can-I-Poo?!"
"Stfu Mezzmar!" replied the monster known as Nauthilax. "I gona shit wheerevr I wan 2!"
"I gona kik ur shity ass!"
"Brring it on, mothafuka!"
Nauthilax shot out flames while Mezzmar shoots a stream of water. While the fight was going on, the two unnoticed kids were wondering how to get out of this mess.
"Quik, letz use our scanrs to leav this shithol!" said the girl.
"But I dont no wich buton is teh warp buton!" Tom said fearfully.
"Sux to b u thn" the girl spoke as she pressed a button on her scanner.
Angry at the unhelpful female, Tom decided to squeeze her breasts. She gasped in shock and was about to slap him, but she already warped out of this existence. The boy smiled at his accomplishment, but soon remembered his predicament and quickly tried to get out of there.
"Hey wayt a fukin minut" Mezzmar interrupted the fight "I herd sumthin behind teh gras!"
Nauthilax put his arm through the grass and pulled out Tom. "Omfg itz a humin!" the monster exclaimed. "I bet he scand me whil I tok a shit!"
"Wtf no!" Tom shouted. "Thats gros!"
"O rly? Wel how bout I shit on U!"
"Fuk dis im outa heer!"
Tom pressed a random button on scanner and instantly vanished!
-
"Whomg!" Tom in the real world gasped. "My mynd just gut hit with a wav of thoghts. Thoghts bout Chaotic and Perim."
"Yeh, that's wat usuly hapens aftr u riturn 2 Chaotic" Kaz said happily. "So, wat hapend?"
"I kikd sum ass, toushd sum boobz."
"Tyght! Hy, wana go c if doin drugz in Chaotic is legl?"
"U bet ur sweet ass!"
The two pulled their scanners, ready for another Chaotic adventure!