Meredith Grey was staring at the ceiling. After two hours of sobbing and crying an exhausted Cristina Yang had collapsed on the couch next to her and she was left with her own thoughts. Derek's words were echoing through her head Put me out of my misery… She should have just done that really, staying with her was wrong for him, he was hopeful, he was a dreamer, he believed in happy endings, he just deserved better. She loved him, he was the only one she had ever loved actually, that was why she had to end it. Of course she would have suffered, but his happiness had to come first; she was too dark and twisty for him. Not even Burke and Christina could make it, how could she even be thinking about making it? She closed her eyes begging for sleep, even though she was still in a sitting position, but Derek's face showed up as soon as her elides were shut. A few tears escaped her eyes as she sobbed in silence, she would have got to cry herself to sleep.

Derek Shepherd was knocking at the door of his Chief 's house, not really remembering why he decided to come here in the first place.

"Hey Shep! To what do I owe the pleasure to have you here?" his Chief was smiling broadly.

"Have you seen Preston?" was his blunt response.

"Uhm… no, not since I told him he was not going to be Chief. Why?"

"Well… he sort of walked away. He broke things off with Christina and I was wondering if you had, maybe, heard from him…"

"Oh… that is so out of the blue… but I'm sorry Derek, I haven't heard from him…"

Richard led him to his living room and sat down, motioning for him to do the same.

Derek sat down his head lifeless in his hands "I think Meredith is trying to break up with me…" he managed finally, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Oh… this is a bit overwhelming. Lots of things seem to have happened today. Why do you think Meredith wants to break up with you?"

"Well.. I don't think she believes in happily ever after anymore… not after today anyhow, but I'm not sure I ever made her truly believe in it. She's too broken now, I don't know if she's going to let me prove her that she'd anything but ordinary… that she's the love of my life… that's why I cannot be Chief, not yet anyhow."

"You don't have to worry about the Chief position, I talked with Adele and the board. I will still be Chief, but I'll work less and I'll make more time for my wife, after all Seattle Grace works just fine without me…"

Derek tried to smile "Good… it'll be good to still have you there…" he murmured.

"So… what are you going to do about Meredith? I'm sure you're not thinking about giving up, are you?"

"No, of course no…" he sighed "she is it for me, you know?" he paused and looked at his mentor " I don't know how to make her understand what she means to me… she… uhm, I'm sure she loves me, but I'm not sure about what to do, we're meant to be together, but she doesn't seem to understand…"

"Then you'll have to make her listen!" both men turned around and were faced with the sight of Adele, she had joined them with the cordless phone in her right hand. She passed it wordlessly to Richard who took it and went to the kitchen to answer to the call.

Adele sat next to Derek and looked at him, he was staring at his shoes, eyes rimmed with tears. She put her hand on his right shoulder and he finally looked up.

"The girl loves you very much…when I spent the day with her I understood it, it was in the way she looked at you when she thought I was not looking at her, in the smile she gave you when we met in the hallway and in the sigh she made when I asked her about you. She might think she doesn't deserve a happy ending, but she does. She's so different from her mother and even though I love Addison very much, I know that you two belong together, so you need to fight for her Derek, don't give up now!"

"I'm not thinking about giving up Adele, it's just… I told her that she was the love of my life and she ran away, she told me that she had to make sure that Cristina got married… why? I don't… I don't understand…"

"She's scared my dear, she's never had an easy life and she doesn't know what an happy ending is and you have made her suffer very much during the last year…"

"I know that, but I thought we were past that…"

"I'm sure you are, but she must be afraid you could leave her again… haven't you thought about that possibility? And maybe… well, maybe you have not been perfect during these last months together either. Richard told me that the race for Chief was rough…"

"I was absent for a while… after she gave up in the water I didn't know what to do and… focusing on my career seemed simpler, but then… when Richard offered me the job I knew I couldn't accept it, Meredith… she's the most important thing for me and I'm not ready to be Chief, not without her by my side…"

"Just like you told these things to me you'll have to tell them to Meredith…"

"But she's so stubborn, I don't think she'll listen. I…"

"I already told you, you'll have to make her listen and then maybe you'll have to repeat those things… whatever it takes to convince her giving you a second chance…"

"It would actually be a third chance…"

"Even better, don't they say third time is the charm?"

Derek truly smiled this time and thanked Adele, then Richard joined them again.

"It was Preston…"

"What happened to him?" Derek was concerned.

"He asked me some time off… I told him to come back whenever he'll feel ready… he sounded broken."

"You should have seen the look in Cristina's eyes" whispered Derek getting up.

"I can imagine…"

They accompanied him to the door and told him goodnight even though they all knew he wouldn't have slept at all.

Next morning came way too soon for everyone. Meredith had tried to sleep while sitting and Cristina had woken up soon after she had collapsed, but she had pretended to be asleep.

In the trailer Derek was lonely, his bed smelled like lavender and everything in the small place reminded him of Meredith.

Izzie had baked all night long and, when Alex came down after a sleepless night she offered him four different kinds of muffins.

"What's wrong with you Izz?" he asked grabbing a chocolate chip one.

"Nothing is wrong… why would something be wrong?"

"Because you're baking, and when you bake there is usually something wrong. I know you more that you think Dr Model!" he grinned at her stuffing the rest of the muffin in his mouth and reaching for a blueberry one.

"Well, Dr Evil Spawn… nothing is wrong with me I just couldn't sleep and I decided to bake breakfast for everyone… after all we need to celebrate… we are not interns anymore, we are residents, we're on the way to be real doctors!" she smiled back then added "Do you think Cristina will be at work today?"

"Oh… I don't know… it must have been so hard. We should call Grey maybe"

"Hey, does that mean that you have a heart after all?"

"I think I already proved you I have one " was his comeback.

"You actually did… let's call Meredith then…" she grabbed her cell phone and pushed the speed dial for Meredith's cell phone.

"Hey, how about George? I haven't seen him yesterday…"

She didn't look at him in the eyes and whispered " I don't know… you should probably ask his wife"

"Something wrong with him?"

She mouthed no then Meredith picked up the phone "Hey Mer… me and Alex were worried about you two… have you guys slept?"

"Well, I didn't, but Cristina did, at least for a while"

"Are you both coming to work?"

"Uhm… I don't think Cristina is…" she looked at her person, she was staring ahead of her, where Burke's saxophone used to be.

"Well, see you later then… in the locker room?"

"Yeah… I'll meet you guys there in an hour or so…"

They both hung up. Meredith went to stand on Cristina's side and hugged her, even though she was not the hugging type. She started sobbing again. Meredith held her without talking, she didn't know what to say. Finally it was Cristina who broke the silence "You can go have a shower, while I make some coffee, I'm sure there is a pair of scrubs somewhere…"

"You don't need to worry, I have two spare pairs at the hospital, but I'll gladly take a shower… are you sure you don't need me to make the coffee?"

"Nah… I like making coffee, go take a shower Mere"

"You're not coming to work, are you?" she whispered.

"No, not today at least… I'm not ready to go back there and… answer questions and…" her voice was broken by a sob "he left Meredith… what am I going to do?"

"I don't know… I whish I did, but… I don't know Cristina. Just, remember that I'm on your side, everyone is… and you'll come back when you're ready"

"Go take a shower, before you make me cry again!"

Meredith tried to smile, maybe her person was coming back, then she went in the bathroom and turned on the water. She stepped in and let the hot liquid pour over her body, she knew it couldn't wash away her sadness, but she could still enjoy the warmness and take a little time to think about the start of her residency.

Forty minutes later Meredith was tying her hair in a ponytail, while Alex was struggling to put the scrub top on and Izzie was trying to make her eat a raspberry muffin. She finally gave up and grabbed the muffin, after all Izzie was a great baker. Izzie smiled satisfied and she chewed absentmindedly.

"So?" her friend pressed.

"It's good Izzie, delicious… but you don't need me to tell you this, do you?"

"No… I wasn't talking about the muffins, I know they are great… I was talking about Cristina, how is she holding up?"

"Not so great, but… she's Cristina, she's strong, but she's not ready to be back yet, I'm sure the Chief will understand" she reached for another muffin, because she found herself suddenly hungry.

Izzie's smile grew wider as she passed her a chocolate chip one.

"Where the hell is Bambi anyhow?" Alex was finally dressed and he was eating another muffin.

The girls turned around looking quite surprised.

"I thought he would have been here by now… he's going to be late. Have you heard from him Izzie?"

"Nope… I haven't, why should have?"

"Hey, Bambi is your best friend!" was Alex's come back.

"Well, but I'm not his baby sitter, am I?"

The pair start bickering, while Meredith drank a sip of water. Then she decided to stop them "How about we go find ourselves something to do?"

They both nodded and they left the locker room, only to be faced with the sight of Bailey's new interns. She was giving them the speech and one of them was not paying attention, but that was not the reason they were staring… the intern was George.

"What's he doing there?"

"I don't know Alex… do you think we should tell him we're not interns anymore?"

"Oh… I knew something was wrong, I cannot believe he didn't tell me, though… I thought I was his best friend!"

"What are you blabbing about Izzie?"

"He must have not passed the exam, what else would he be doing there with the new interns?"

"But he said he passed, why would he lie?"

"I don't know…" was all Izzie whispered.

Alex was about to say something when Addison Montgomery joined them.

"So I heard you're residents now…"

The three of them nodded, still staring wide-eyes at George and his fellow interns.

"How about you come help me Karev? I have a woman carrying triplets in pre-term labor"

"Sounds fun!" he had a cocky grin on his face.

"Meredith… how is Yang holding up?" Addison added before leaving.

"Not so good, but… she's a fighter, you know?"

The older woman smiled and then she followed Alex towards the neonatal wing.

"So… Alex found something to do… and we are just staring… interesting…"

Izzie was not paying attention though "I cannot believe it… not only she want to have a kid with him, she doesn't let him talk to me"

"What are you talking about Izzie?"

"It has got to be Callie's fault… why else would George not tell me about this?"

"Maybe… well, maybe he was scared"

"Of what? I would never make fun of him, if he thinks that, he doesn't know me at all!"

Just then Bailey was done with the assignments for her new interns and she joined her former ones.

"By the surprise on your face I understand that he didn't tell you…"

"That's right, he didn't even tell me, his best friend!"

"Stevens, what O'Malley did is his own business, you know how hard it is to retake your first year of residency? Do you have any idea?"

They both whispered no "Neither do I… let's give him some time, all right? Thanks God Shepherd requested him today, so he won't feel like a total failure…"

"Derek… I mean Dr Shepherd requested him?"

"Yes Grey, he thought it would have been a good idea to not have him waste his talent, even though he didn't pass the exam it doesn't mean he's not a good doctor"

"I know that…"

"Anyhow, I'm not here to gossip, I was paged for a consult in the pit, and since you're both here I thing you should join me. Where did Karev go?"

"Dr Montgomery has a woman with triplets in pre-term labor…"

"Good… how's Yang doing?"

"Not so good, she'll be back at some point though… should I go tell the Chief?"

"Don't worry I'll do that later Grey… let's go now!"

As Meredith waited for the elevator's doors to open she suddenly remembered that she should have known better. The doors opened and, as people started to emerge, her eyes were caught by two figures standing in the back, wearing dark blue scrubs who were deep in conversation. She got in along with Izzie and Bailey and he finally looked up. His blue eyes locked with hers and she let go of a breathe she didn't know she was holding. Mark Sloane was also looking at her, but she didn't notice.

"Hey…" he finally whispered.

"Hi…" she breathed back as Izzie elbowed her in the ribs.

"How's Cristina?"

"She's not so good, but… you know her… she's a fighter, she's broken now, but she'll be back…" she felt herself smiling and she didn't know the reason. She actually knew it was the sight of Derek who made her smile, but she didn't want to think about that, she promised herself she would have put an end to his misery, but this sounded way too hard now that their eyes were locked.

"Oh… I went to the Chief yesterday night. Preston actually called, he asked some time off, but I don't know where he is, maybe he told Richard, but he didn't tell me…"

"I see, I will tell Cristina…"

"Okay…"

"Okay…"

The elevator's doors opened again and they all got out.

"See you later Meredith… bye Stevens, bye Miranda…"

"Yeah… see you later Der… Dr Sloane…"

The three women went towards the pit, while the men went for a consult in a room on the other side.

"That, my man was the most pathetic conversation ever!" Mark was looking concerned.

"Mind your own business Mark!"

"If you want to win her back I don't think that's the way to do it…"

"Of course I do and I also know that I cannot win her back like that… but we were in an elevator full of people…"

"We were, but you two seemed lost in your own little world…"

"We were…" he was still feeling the lavender scent.

"Than you should get a move on or someone else will steal her from you!"

"And who are you talking about?"

"Nobody Derek, but she's hot and if you don't claim her someone else will…"

"Why I told you about my problems is beyond me…" he sighed frustrated.

"You did it because you miss me…" Mark had a cocky grin on his face and Derek knew he was right, but he wouldn't have told him, not now at least.

They got in the exam room and found the doctor who had called for a neuro and plastic consult for his patient.

Later in the day at lunch Meredith was sitting with Izzie and Alex who was telling them about his case. The girls were scrubbing in with Bailey after lunch, they were removing a tumor in the guy that they examined in the pit. His car accident actually saved him, because he hadn't know about the tumor before and they had caught it early enough. She was about to do her first operation as a resident and all she could think about was Derek.

"Earth to Meredith… are you listening to us?"

"Sorry I have something in my mind…"

"Does that something have blue eyes, great hair and a killer smile?" Izzie wondered.

"Maybe…" she blushed and bit her sandwich.

"Well then, coming up… he's over there getting coffee…"

She looked up and saw him, he looked exhausted.

"Why don't you go talk to him Meredith?" asked Alex while stuffing his mouth with chips.

"Because…"

"That's not an answer, you know? Unless you're in a group of pre-school kids…" Izzie was grinning.

"I can't, okay… I need to sort out my thoughts… I don't know what to say and… we're here to work…" she was rambling.

"Whatever you say… you know you can't escape, right?" Alex was staring at her.

" I do…" she nodded "he's so damn stubborn!"

"But he loves you" Izzie interrupted her, while Alex nodded along.

"I do too…" she whispered.

Then they were joined by George who look exhausted.

"How could you not tell us?" Izzie attacked him.

He looked ashamed.

"Don't worry dude, she's overreacting…"

"I'm not Alex. We're his friends, how could he not tell us?"

"Izzie, give him a chance to talk…" Meredith pat George on the back.

"Well… it was out of the blue, I thought I did good and then I failed… I didn't know what to do… I wasn't even sure I was going to come back… but then again, I'm a surgeon, how could I not? So… I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I was ashamed…"

"It's okay…" was Meredith's response as Alex nodded.

Izzie still looked mad, bus it had nothing to do with the fact he didn't pass. To her George not telling her was like saying that she wasn't important for him and it hurt, it hurt too much.

She was about to say something, but Meredith grabbed her by the arm "We have to go prep out guy!" she said cheerfully.

The girls got up and left while Alex looked at George and grinned "Dude, she's so pissed at you!"

" I know she is…" he murmured.

"It'll pass, don't worry about it… so, any hot chicks in the new group?"

"Actually… there is Meredith's sister"

"Holy crap… that girl sure has so many problems it's not even funny!"

" I know…"

At the end of the day Meredith, Izzie and Alex said bye to George, who was stuck in the hospital for 48 hours straight, and went to pick up Cristina, they decided it was better for her to not stay at Burke's.

As the two cars pulled up in the driveway of Meredith's house they all felt like something was different, a new page of their life was starting.

The four doctors got in the house and collapsed on the couch. Alex turned on the TV, some medical drama was on, he was about to switch channel, but the three girls stopped him. He whined and went in the kitchen to get some other muffins, then joined them on the couch again.

"When this is over we're watching some wrestling!" he said.

"In your dreams Karev!" was Christina's answer.

"At least some of your mom's surgery Grey!" he whined.

"That we can do…" Meredith smiled, she could get through this. She had friends by her side and she knew Derek loved her. True, she was an avoider, but she would have got to talk to him and maybe it was better to do so sooner rather than later.

That night everybody slept better than the previous one.