Butter's Secret

Butters trudged in through the doorway of his house, eyes on the hardwood floor. He glanced at the family pictures on the wall, with he and his parents smiling. his overprotective, angry, evil parents. He wanted to defy them so badly, but couldn't bring himself to bear the consequences. Now, Butters had a secret that his parents didn't know, that they would never find out, unless he told them. That was his plan. To tell his parents. They would be crushed. He wanted to hurt them. His attempt at being a super villain had failed, as had his attempt to be a vampire. This time, he would prevail.

He was sixteen. If he needed to, he could become an emancipated minor. His parents could disown him, but he could report him to the police. Not that the would do anything, he thought bitterly. The police in this redneck mountain town were so stupid, they couldn't tell left from right. His friends has once decided to help him, and that turned out terribly. He couldn't wait to leave this town. He would probably never have to see his parents again after he told them. He couldn't wait.

As he walked through the hall, he took a long look at his childhood home. He had so many memories of this place. Memories of his AWESOM-O robot (which turned out to be Eric). He had memories of going to Hawaii with Kenny. Memories of tutoring Stan. Memories of Casa Bonita with Kyle. He was sure going to miss those fellers. He needed to leave this little town. This quiet little redneck, podunk, whitetrash, psycho mountain town. His home. It was still the same old South Park from his childhood. Kyle's mom was still a last week, Cartman had tried to kill all of the health food in South Park because it didn't "respect his authoritah."

Butters walked up the stairs, making sure to skip the fifth step because it squeaked. He walked into his room, and looked at his collection of magazines under his bed. Another part of his secret. This was the room where he had spent all of his days being grounded. This was the room where he had talked to a group of reporters about a book he had "written" in his sleep. This was the room where he had had countless sleepovers with Eric Theodore Cartman. Another reason to leave South Park. When he had told his friends the aforementioned secret, only Cartman had flipped out. Eric Fucking Cartman. Eric, who had tricked him into telling his secrets. Eric, who was "secretly" in love with Wendy Testaburger. Eric, who had made Butters bury him in the snow.

Stan had been a little shocked, but supportive. "It's your life," he had said. Butters felt like it wasn't his life. It belonged to his parents and friends. His parents constantly grounded him. He always felt like he was the replaceable friend. The one who you called on when you needed a replacement. When I leave, Butters wondered, Will there be a replacement for me? He laid his things down, on his bed.

Kyle was okay with his secret, too. He said that he had figured. Of course he had figured. He was Kyle. He knew everything. Kyle had always been kind to him. Kenny was probably either a little bit high or drunk because he kissed Butters on the cheek. Craig hadn't said anything. Tweek had twitched and asked about the pressure. Everybody had been supportive, except Cartman.

Butters gathered his remaining courage. He was sure. Even after reminiscing, he still wanted to get the hell out of this white trash town. He walked towards his parents bedroom, and opened the door. He took a deep breath.

"Mom, Dad. I have something to tell you. I don't want you to judge me," he said with finality.

"What is it Butters?" His father asked, and he winked at Linda. Stephen and Linda Stotch had merely stayed together because they didn't want to hurt Butters, their only son. They fought constantly, and judging by his mother's red eyes, they had fought earlier in the day.

"Mom, Dad….I have wanted to tell you for a while now…" he trailed off. His mother got her wallet out.

"I am bike-curious."

A/N: I started to write a coming out story, but then I realized that "The Simpsons had already done it," so I added a twist. Those magazines? Motorcycle magazines. And yes, Kenny was drunk or high.