Welcome To Mario Kart, Part 1
(how MK64 began)
a/n: made some very necessary changes but the story remains the same—simple as it is. I'm just not one of those greatly creative, complex writers but hope you can enjoy it anyway.
Watch My Back, I Watch Yours
"Hey, Luigi! Come here! Come taste this...it's really good!"
Luigi was in the living-room watching the Sky channel's marathon of the original series, "Voyage To The Bottom Of The Mushroom Sea" when he heard his brother calling him from the kitchen. Not really wanting to get up from his favorite soft leather reclining chair in the great room of his rather quaint mushroom abode, he stayed there for a few more seconds—
"Luigi! I said come in here and taste this! Just try it, you'll like it!"
"...try this...try that...mama-mia..." Luigi grumbled as he pulled himself out of the chair and went to he kitchen where Mario had a plate of something out on the counter, and he watched Mario dig a fork into a piece of meat that looked like either chicken or the other white meat. And this meat had been dipped into some sort of gravy and smothered in noodles and whatever else.
"Mmm.." Mario ate like a pig. "..Good! Very good!"
Now Luigi, being the skinny brother that he was, had a tough time pretending to be interested.
"Come on, Luigi! Grab a fork and dig in!" Mario pressed on. "You have to eat if you are going to be involved in long races!"
"What?"
"You know, the races."
Luigi was baffled. "No, I don't know any races."
Mario stopped gobbling his food, which ended the lip-smacking sound effects. "Hold it, didn't I tell you about Mario Kart 64?"
"No. No you didn't."
"Oh." Mario seemed sneakier than ever before. He put down the fork and wiped his mouth with a napkin then turned to Luigi. "I am buying eight karts. They are all very nice. Even better than the ones we had in the last kart races! I can hardly wait for you to see them. I pay three hundred for each one. Anyway, they have capability of running at 50cc, 100cc, and when we get good, we will go at 150cc."
"One fifty.." Luigi groveled. "That's deadly."
"Oh stop being party-pooper. We will be on roads designated just for the races--well--except for Toad's Turnpike...but we don't need to worry about that right now--"
"Toad's Turnpike? Racing? On Toad's Turnpike?!
"..And then DK's Jungle Parkway..."
"What?!"
"And of course we will have some difficult maneuvers to make on Banshee Boardwalk..."
"Mama-mia!"
"But Luigi, we will be able to challenge Bowser directly in battle mode once again!"
"I don't want to challenge Bowser in battle mode!"
"You chicken," Mario snapped. "Like...like this right here!" He then stabbed the fork into another piece of meat which at least wasn't a mystery anymore.
"Chicken, eh?" went Luigi.
"Yes! Chicken!" Mario held the fork with the cube of chicken on the end in front of Luigi's face. "You're a chicken just like this! Only a chicken would be afraid to race on Rainbow Road!"
"Rainbow Road? Okay, brother. So tell me, what happens if we go off the course in Rainbow Road? At those speeds I know there is at least one big hill that we could shoot right off into the sky!"
"Lakitu."
"What?"
"Lakitu. He will pick us up."
"You are trying to tell me the dead turtle's coming back to lift us up from the sky, kart and all, back onto the tracks?"
"Exactly."
Luigi laughed. "Oh HoHoHo! And you have arranged for all this with...Lakitu?"
"Exactly." Mario said again.
"Mama mia, you talk to a dead turtle now!" Luigi turned in a fit of rage and then he stopped on a dime to face his brother. "You are crazy, Mario! You blow twenty-four hundred dollars on these karts just so you can battle Bowser?!"
"No! No! We all take part in this. For good causes, you know! Feeding starving little goombas and finding good shells for unfortunate little koopas!" Mario explained. "And it is not just about Bowser...it's about winning, period. And winning is of course what I do best!"
"You are now interested in feeding little goombas so you can stomp them to death when they grow up..."
Mario frowned. "That was a low blow, Luigi. Low blow."
"So where are these karts you are talking about?"
"Actually, I haven't paid for them yet. They are over in Sega Genesisland...you know, where they make some of the most popular games in the world...of course they have learned a lot of what they know from Nintendo... Anyway, I talk to this nice young fellow named Sonic--"
"The hedgehog?"
"Yes. He told me about some karts for sale by some guy named Doctor Robotnik. If he's a doctor, they must be pretty good. Anyway, we go over there today to take a look at them, eh?"
The Princess' Journal
Dear Dairy,
Mario told me yesterday that he is thinking of one day building a house near the Kalimari Desert. I can't understand why in the world he would want to do this, especially when I've always thought he wanted to live here, in the Royal Mushroom Palace. Isn't this good enough for him, or is he shunning it because it so old? This palace has been in my family more than fifty years. It has been photographed by Grand Traditional Places of Mushroom Kingdom Magazine and was used as a model for a company called Nintendo, who makes games for people in a place far, far away from here. And even Mario has been very beneficial in keeping up our palace by fixing pipes and walls and floors and whatever else we've needed. Sometimes I wonder just how long I should wait for Mario to decide on just what he wants in life. Sometimes I think I should have kept seeing his brother, Luigi. After all, Luigi was so very special to me. Princess Daisy doesn't know how lucky a woman she really is.
--Peach
"Your purse, Princess?"
"Hmm? Oh, Toad. I wasn't expecting you. How long have you been standing there?"
The little round mushroom guy stood with a smile. "Not long. Your purse, Princess."
"Actually, I didn't ask for it."
Toad nodded and spoke in his squeaky little voice. "I know, but Mario just called and told me to get you ready because he's taking you shopping."
"Oh..." the Princess blushed. "How nice. I hope he's taking me to that nice new Portabello mall."
Toad continued helping the Princess get ready and kept her company until Mario arrived.
Despite popular belief, Mario Mario doesn't have to run everywhere he goes, as a matter of fact, in his spare time he enjoys taking long drives with Princess Peach Toadstool in his very sharp metallic blue, five-speed, James-Bondish two-seater that he simply refers to as "The Sportster" and speaks of it as "a finely tuned machine with a very powerful engine that purrs."
Toad stood outside the castle waving and jumping up and down as he saw the car in the distance. "He's here!"
Princess Peach came outside just as Mario pulled up and got out of the car.
"Hello Toad!" said Mario. "Hello my lovely Princess Toadstool! I hope you can be gone for a while because this is going to be a long trip."
"I'm ready when you are." she said dreamily.
"Ok, then let's go!"
Mario first got the princess seated and strapped in, being the gentleman that he was, then he went back around and opened the driver's side door.
"How about you, Toad? You go too?"
"Ahhahaha..." Toad laughed.
"Mario!" Peach called from inside the car.
"Yes, he can come too. This is something very important--"
"But Mario." went Peach. "He has to stay here to watch the castle. You know that."
After a little bit of thought, Mario looked at the little guy and shrugged. "So, we lock up the castle for while...hang a note on the door..."
"Ahahahaha!" Toad cackled.
"I don't think so!" Peach crossed her arms in a snit.
"But Peach, this is something extremely important, and I wouldn't want to pick the wrong size--" Mario slapped a hand over his mouth knowing he had let out too much information, but the princess, she looked like she was suddenly in total heaven.
"Size?" she asked. "You have to pick the right size?"
"Well...uh.." Mario stammered. "...yes...we do... But we don't need to go into details now, ok?"
Peach gazed at Mario with her eyes twinkling and thought to herself— this is it he's ready to buy the ring!
Meanwhile, Mario went ahead with his plans.
"There is a little space for you right back here." he said as he pulled the driver's seat forward for Toad.
And the little guy hopped right in then quickly nestled himself in a tiny compartment just large enough for him to fit.
Alas, Mario made the victory sign and said,
"Here we go!"
Shopping Karts
"Well, look at this pretty one we have here. If you don't mind my saying, I think it's your color."
Luigi focused his eyes on the one lime green kart in the bunch and even though he wasn't very keen on this idea of a second kart race fundraiser, he wondered just how well the thing handled and how comfortable was the seat and what the engine would sound like when he put the pedal to the metal like his all-time favorite racer, Mario Andretti.......uh..well...his brother, Mario Mario....
"You like it?" asked the mechanical looking Doctor Robotnik. "Here, why don't you try it out? Your brother told me to give you first pick. If you don't care for it we can always put you in something different."
After taking a moment to think on it, Luigi stepped to the kart and was about to take the helm when suddenly a car came screeching onto the lot from Sonic Avenue and Luigi didn't even have to look to know it was his brother because Mario loved spinning those tires and kicking up dirt and stopping on a dime just to show off.
"Here he is now!" said Robotnik.
Indeed, Mario had made a grand entrance, and Luigi bent over to look into the car and was surprised to see two passengers, Peach in front and Toad snuggled in back, but then somewhat disturbing was the fact that Peach seemed rather angry, perhaps even downright furious.
"Hello! It's me, Mario!" Mario got out to greet Robotnik but the doc didn't seem the least bit impressed. "You test drive one yet?" he asked Luigi, then went around to open the door for Peach.
"I am not getting out of this car!" she snapped. "I mean it, Mario! You tricked me into this! I refuse to take part in this sideshow of yours!"
"Ah...come now, Princess Toadstool," he reached in, trying to pull her out but she would not budge. "Please, Peachy..."
She smacked his hand instantly. "How dare you call me that in front of strangers!"
Mario retracted, his pride slightly bruised. "But this will help the less fortunate of our Mushroom Kingdom--!"
"Not to mention that we will be able to challenge Bowser in battle mode..." Luigi added with a pinch of cynicism.
"Be quiet, Luigi," went Mario.
"Don't you tell him to be quiet!" Peach demanded.
"Thank you, Princess." said Luigi.
"You're welcome."
"..You are a sneaky devil, Luigi.." Mario mumbled.
"No sneakier than you—"
"Alright, alright, enough already!" shouted Toad who had finally hopped out of Mario's flashy sportscar and began flailing his arms while leaping up and down. "That one! That one!" He bounced like a ball and pointed to a blue kart next to the green one Luigi liked.
"Well good," said Robotnik the salesman with a nod. "That one's just right for you. It's small yet powerful, really speedy too—"
"Oh no you don't!" Peach finally got out of the car and went to snatch Toad away from the kart before he could plop into it. "I'll not let this happen again! The last time we raced the people of Mushroom Kingdom suffered greatly! They were placing bets and some of them became very rude and nasty! Many of the children got bad grades in school because their parents dragged them to the events and wouldn't leave until we were all finished!"
"Ah," Mario disagreed. "The kids had a very good time....they liked to watch us racing....and especially they liked seeing their princess win so many times."
Peach glared sharply at him.
"O-kay!" went Toad who was already in his little blue kart and started the engine, then he took off around the lot, trying out turns and the passing gear, then Mario, ready for this competition, ran to the nearest red kart and hopped in, started up the engine then took off after Toad, leaving the princess and Luigi behind to literally eat his dust.
Peach waved off the filthy cloud of dirt and coughed.
"Princess, are you alright?" Luigi put an arm around her.
"No, I am not!"
"Yes, I understand."
Dr. Robotnik found it amusing. "I rented a few of those item boxes from your kingdom. These karts have one feature I think you'll really appreciate—"
Before the doc said another word, Toad had picked up an item box which automatically activated the spinning force field around his kart. Three red shells rotated around him and when Mario whizzed by, Toad pulled the trigger on his steering wheel, releasing a shell at a blazing speed which quickly honed in like a rocket on Mario's kart, and Toad laughed loudly, "Yeah! HEHEHEHE!" when it made a perfect hit that sent Mario and his kart tumbling up into the air then bouncing back down to the ground with a "boink!" Took several seconds off of Mario's lead.
"Wow!" Luigi perked up. "Did you see that? Amazing! The shells rotating in mid air like that.... That's really slick! Did you see that, Princess Toadstool? That's even better than the last--"
Something pink zoomed by Luigi and to his surprise it was Peach! In a pink kart with her hair whipping in the wind! She was fast! So fast that she even caught up to Mario after scooping up an item box, then a bolt of lightning cracked, causing Luigi's heart to just about jump out of his chest...
"Lightning bolt," said Robotnik. "She just shrunk 'em. Hey..look at her! She just ran over Mario and smooshed him! And look, that little Toad fellow spun off into the grass! My, my..." Robitnik smoothed his tie with a smile and lit up a cigar to celebrate, for he knew he had just made a nice big sale. "...you all are gonna have a blast at this, I can already tell. You guys can write me in for a couple tickets to this fundraiser of yours..."
I Spy On You
"...ah....let me see here.....put knob on the highest power and aim directly at subject... ....now take the banana.... uh...the banana? What is this? I have no banana. ....What kind of instructions is this? ...Next, load mushroom to boost your kart's power quickly.....let me see.... Hmm...kart racing? That is it, Bowser! The box you have stolen from the castle contains these instructions to driving karts! You know what that means, my friend? That means they are planning another one of those kart race fundraisers...and this time, Wario will not be left out!"
In his bright yellow outfit, the one and only methodical crook, Wario of Wario Land, circled the room several times, thinking deeply as he chewed on a yellow number 2 pencil and began studying the instruction booklet very intensely while King Bowser Koopa sat watching and listening as he ate some flies and rats that Wario had laid out as an elaborate appetizer just for him..
"Let's see.....you have the mushroom and the triple mushrooms... You have the single green shell, triple green shells....but wait...they rotate around your kart? Nah...that's impossible...even in Mushroom World! And a lightning bolt that shrinks everyone else? ....And this....the spiky blue shell that goes after anyone in first place... Now that sounds like a great weapon! I tell you King Bowser, they plan this behind our backs but we'll get in! And me, I'm Wario! I'm gonna win!"
"AHAHA AAAAAAGH!" went Bowser.
"Of course...." Wario agreed. "...you too. We both win! I bet you he will call this one Mario Kart Two or something like that... Well, after I'm finished with them, they will call it Super Wario Kart Extreme! EH HEHEHEHE! And this time they will race on my turf! Wario Stadium!..."
"AAAAAAH AAAAGH!!"
"What? Your castle? You think we should race in your castle? ...Well.." Wario went to the mantle to grab his yellow cap and shaped it. "..I don't know about that. That would be difficult, eh? Anyways, I thought you were doing a little remodeling on the castle? I would think that would get in the way."
"AHAAAAAH AAAAAAH!"
"Lava jumps? You have prepared some lava jumps that would work just perfectly for this? Well...I guess...." Wario tried not to sweat in front of King Koopa. "...Lava jumps sound good... Anyway.." he proudly put on his cap and proclaimed once again, " ...I'm-a Wario! I'm-a gonna win!"