The water's washing around my feet. But I can still hear the busy road some distance behind me.
But I don't know where I am.
"PHAROAH!" He doesn't turn around, "Pharaoh?"
It's the same as last night. I stand on the jetty. And he's leaving. In to the great light, that's where the boat is sailing, and he doesn't care.
The bell from the dock is sounding.
"PHAROAH!" I'm screaming now. The tears from my eyes are merging with the sea. He doesn't want to see me again.
After all we went through. He left.
"Pharaoh?"
Tea jolted awake from the sound of the smooth jazz that came from the club she was working at. She sighed and lifted her heavy arms off the dressing room table. She glanced at the clock. An hour before she was on.
Time for a walk to refresh her mind.
The lights around her created the sense of dawn, even though it was clearly night. Some of the houses around her reminded her of a trip to England she had taken with Joey some years ago. Three if she remembered correctly. Why was she thinking this now? She's worked in this part of New York for years.
And he'd never come to see her...
Everything seemed grey to her. It was probably the rain. But the lights danced through the rain, shooting bright specks of colour through the streets. But no. Grey.
She took her usual route.
She always thought the Pharaoh might find her. If she took the same route, through the same town, always without him, he might find her. And join her. But she had tried all summer, and now summer was fading away, leaving the dull colours of autumn in her path. The summer made her think of him. That night, it had been so warm...
A car drove past, spraying her lightly with water, but enough to wake her from her daydream.
Or just dream. It wasn't exactly day, after all.
Wherever he's gone, I imagine it's late...
She kept herself occupied with thoughts like these, trying to convince herself he wasn't in the afterlife, but somewhere where he could be asleep.
Whilst she was wide awake.
Her sleep was so broken, always filled with the same dream.
The rain brought her back to New York again, as she shook a few cold drops from her face.
She looked around the city.
She had to go back, she was on soon.
She walked up on to the small wooden stage, her hands clasped tightly round her opposite arms. She was cold. Lonely. This was not her dream.
Don't be lonely, Tea.
She smiled to herself, the sound of his voice in her head was like music.
Don't worry, Yami. she thought, Loneliness can be ignored.
Time had taught her how to do that. But had it really? Deep down, she felt empty and sad, like there was nothing for her to dance for. Initially, she had danced for her rent, for her money for auditions, for herself. But as time had gone on, these reasons seemed worthless. she only danced for the Pharoah. The thought that if he was visiting, he's see her name written at 11.30- 12.30. Tea Gardner. The Gangster's youngest dancer.
She hated her routine. The way she had to repeat those disgusting moves night after night for the pleasure of men she'd never met. This was not the woman she wanted to be.
Don't you worry Pharaoh.
Would he have even cared?
I'm missing you so much.
Her routine was so carved in to her brain, she could think only of him for the whole thing, and still be perfect.
Why was she even here.
Why was he not?