Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Sqare Enix does, nor do I own the song Keep Holding On, Avril Lavigne does.
Rated M for Language and possibly sexual content in later chapters.
Byooki Ga Waruku Naru
Chapter One
By DaniiFlame
When a child is diagnosed with any sort of fatal sickness, the hardest part, for the doctor, is informing the family. Now, when said child is informed about said diagnosis, the hardest part for him is relaying that to his friends and family.
I would know. My name is Sora Shitoyakasa. I was recently diagnosed with Leukemia. The only people in my life who currently know are my parents. They took the blow harder than I did. I think maybe because I hadn't quite understood at the time. I mean, why me? I've had a little under a month to contemplate this. That's how long ago I was told. What a way to start a new school year...
I live my life as any normal 16 year old would. I play sports with my best friend, Riku Utsukushii, and the neirboor hood kids. I attend school normaly, and, I get my ass kicked in video games against everyone I play against. Like I said, normal. The only thing that's not normal is walking away from a game of soccer with bruises all over your back from people lightly patting it. My wrists, bruised and sore from gaming. Random nose bleeds, and a consisting pain in my abdominal area. I've lost weight at a rate that would make bulemic girls jealous.
But, I mean, who can complain? I'm still alive, right? This is just one of life's hardships. I know I'll make it through. I'm a strong kid.
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Know what I never understood? How people could just start crying over a song. I mean, my mother use to just break down into tears listening to the Titanic theme song. You know, the one Celine Dion sings? Yea, that one. Anyway, I never understood why, or how, people could just start crying. Well, that was until just the other day.
Here's what happened:
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I've always had a thing for Avril Lavigne. I don't know why, but her music just seems to be what I like. Odd for a 16 year old male, I know. So, when I heard she had a new song, I just had to listen to it.
BIG mistake.
I should have known it would be a little... touchy. I tend to really listen to what her lyrics say instead of the beat.
So I jumped on the computer to search this song. Keep Holding On. Hmm. Interesting. Says she wrote it for the new movie Eragon. That aside, I find the damned song. After waiting for it to download, I think; 'What the hell. Blare it. Mom likes her too.' So, music up on full blast through my computer speakers, I sit and listen.
Now, I've really noticed that Avril Lavigne has grown. Her music isn't as.. erm.. angsty? So, she's matured and it shows through her music. Okay, so I wasn't exactly expecting this really sappy song. To say I was amazed.. would be an understatement.
You're not alone
Together we stand
I'll be by your side
You know I'll take your hand
When it gets cold
And it feels like the end
There's no place to go
You know I won't give in
No, I won't give in
Okay. Cute. Friendship, love. Who knows. But I liked it. I thought it to be good, so far.
Keep holding on
Cause you know we'll make it through
We'll make it through
Just stay strong
Cause you know I'm here for you
I'm here for you
There's nothing you can say
Nothing you can do
There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So, keep holding on
Cause you know we'll make it through
We'll make it through
That was it. That was all it took. I just broke down there. I stopped listening to the lyrics. I think it was there that everything finally sunk in. I was going to die soon because of this damned disease! I started bawling. I couldn't help it. I properly understood everything. Somehow, it took this song to help me. I was going to die. I lay my head in my arms and continued to cry, not caring that my mother had me in her arms, trying to calm me.
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I couldn't believe it happened. After that, I basically just layed in my room and stared blankly at my ceiling. I didn't talk to anyone, I didn't eat, I didn't move. I think I fell asleep a couple hours later. But, I lost track. All I could think about then was what I would never get to do in life unless they found someone to give me the bone marrow transplant.
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"Sora, you've not been outta your damn house in almost a week! School doesn't count either."
Sigh. That's Riku for you. The kid worries too much. Okay, so usually I am outside hanging out with him and Tidus playing Soccer or some other rough sport. But, since my little breakdown... I've not had the energy to do anything other then attend my classes and study.
"I'm sorry. I just... haven't been feeling all that hot lately."
Lame excuse. I know. But.. what am I supposed to say? "Oh, yea. About that... I just don't feel like playing around with you guys because I'm going to die of Leukemia soon and I just properly understood."? Somehow, I don't think that would work.
"What? Why didn't you say so earlier?! Sora! I'm your friend and should be able to know these things! Want me to come over? Take care of you while your folks are out?"
I shouldn't have said anything. I forgot how he was when I get sick.. Last time I was sick it was with the stomache flu. The kid didn't leave my side. He was constantly taking my temperature, trying to get me to eat and just sitting there looking at me as if I were some helpless child. I admit. It was sweet. But he acted like my mother..
"No. It's alright Riku. I'll be fine. I'm just tired and all."
He breathed a heavy sigh. He was not going to back down. It was a lost cause on my part.
"I don't care. I'm coming over. Someone has to be there for you right now."
I smiled. Atleast I knew he would help me through this. Oh.. wait.. he doesn't know about my... condition.
"Alright. I'll see you soon then."
I could practically hear the smile in his voice.
"See ya in 10."
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Had I known I be in for this treatment, I'd have not given in. The kid was nuts!
I say I'm not feeling good and he decides to raid my kitchen for soup. All the while muttering under his breath. "If I wasn't here, kid would starve himself.."
Okay..So my eating habits aren't the greatest. Actually... the only time I really do eat is when I'm threatened or if I'm terribly hungry. I don't starve myself, I just don't eat regular meals. It's been chalked up to appetite los due to the Leukemia.
So, he makes me soup. Vegetable soup to be exact. Can't complain. Riku can take anything and make it... great. For lack of better word. He's not the kind to just whip it up. He takes his time and adds things to every meal he makes. Don't know what he added this time, but it was wonderful.
The only thing that bothered me, was he fed me. He thought I was incapable! His turqoise eyes wide with concern as he sat infront of me with the bowl in his hands. Brushing a strand of silk like, silver hair behind his ear, he continued feeding me.
"You know, I can feed myself."
Somehow, I didn't think it would work though. He chuckled and shook his head, silver strands swaying with his head, beautiful turqoise eyes closed and a smile on his lips.
"I don't care. You said you were feeling sick. Relax and just let me take care of you."
I did then what I did only in desperate measures.
I pouted.
Pathetic, maybe.
Affective, hell yes!
He sighed and shifted his eyes to the side. I always got him with it! He handed me the bowl and I reached out to take it. What I failed to notice was that my sweater shifted and the sleeves rode up.
Now, you probably think "So what. Big deal."
It was the worst thing to happen though. I had taken to wearing sweaters and long sleeved shirts to cover my wrists, which were a horrible shade of blue, purple and even green. Bruises from my late night gaming as of late.
He grabbed my arm and with his other hand he moved the soup onto the table.
"Sora, what the fuck happened to your wrists?" He all but growled.
I hung my head in shame. I guess I thought I would be able to hide this from him forever. He pulled the sleeve up and examined my left wrist.
"Sora, I want to know what happened."
I looked up at him then, my eyes wide and watery with unshed tears. This is what I had been worrying about. The confrontation with my friends. Especially Riku.
"Riku.. I.."
I couldn't say it. I didn't want him to know. I hung my head again. Pathetic. That's what I was. Totally and utterly Pathetic.
"Sora? Sora, you have to tell me. Please. I need to know. Are you being abused?"
I shook my head, staring at the blanket around me.
"Then what the hell happened?" Concern swept his voice, making it crack as if he was going to cry.
"Riku. I didn't exactly.. want to tell you." I tried that approach.
I heard him growl. I knew he'd be mad at that. I mean, afterall, we'd been friends since kindergarden.
"Tell me what?"
Oh yea. He's pissed.
"Riku I have Leukemia."
Anyone wondering, Byooki Ga Waruku Naru means To Take a Turn for the Worse. (In an illness)
Sora's last name, Shitoyakasa, literally means Grace. Riku's last name, Utsukushii, literally means Beautiful. Wierd last names, but they somewhat suit them, ne?
If you have any questions, PM me about them. Please review!
Lots of love: DaniiFlame
I'm also looking for a Beta. Anyone interested? PM me!