Chapter 1 Sad Memories
When Inuyasha woke up he was surprised to find that he wasn't in his tree just outside the village or even near the village for that matter. That he could tell easily because first off he could feel the ground underneath him. His could tell that the he was no longer near the village that he could tell because he could smell it in the air. Curious to understand he opened his eyes. The first thing he noticed upon that action was that he could see a little clearer than was normal and then he saw Rin. Rin was with Shesshomaru for the week because that was what she wanted for her birthday. Then he saw Joken and the two-headed dragon Ah-un. He touched the top of his head. There were no ears there he felt the side of his head. Sure enough there were pointed ears. His eyes widened hoping that what he suspected wasn't the truth and he went over to the nearby river so that he could see his reflection and opened his mouth in a silent scream.
When Shesshomaru woke up he was surprised to find that he was in a tree. But then again it wouldn't be the first time that had happened and he could tell that it was still to early for anyone else to be up yet so he wasn't worried. He opened his eyes and wondered why his vision was acting a little weird and he also wondered why he felt a lot he sick? He was a very strong demon but even he fell ill sometimes. Then he looked around and saw the village that Inuyasha and his friends lived in. That was a little weird considering that he had left with Rin yesterday. He looked down at himself and was surprised to find that he was clad in the robe of the firerat.
"Inuyasha," he heard the human woman Kagome call up to him. "Time for breakfast."
Sesshomaru opened his mouth to tell her that he was not Inuyasha and he was surprised when nothing came out. He tried to say something else to put to test the theory that he was not able to reveal his identity. "Coming," he said. Then he hopped down from the tree and landed right in front of Kagome. He was surprised to feel his heart beat a little quicker and he was even more shocked when he found that he wanted to pull her into his arms and never let go. So Inuyasha really loves her he thought to himself realizing that the emotions were the reactions of Inuyasha's body and not his own.
"Aren't you listening to me?" Kagome said tweaking his ear and bringing him out of his musings.
"Yeah I heard you." He said trying to sound gruff and failing. "Let's go to the old bat's house and chow down."
"Who are ye calling an old bat," Keade said appearing out of nowhere.
Kagome just laughed and took his hand leading him to the food.
"Lord Sesshomaru," Rin said as she ran toward him wearing a bright pink kimono with white flower print all over it.
Inuyasha opened his mouth to say that he wasn't his brother but no words came out.
Suddenly Rin tripped and his body moved almost without his consent to catch her. As he held her warmth pervaded him and he had to force himself not to smile.
So he loves her, Inuyasha thought to himself. He had suspected it but now he was certain of it because of the way that he felt as he held her in his arms was quite similar to the way he felt for Kagome.
"Rin," Joken snapped at the girl. How dare she make his lord go to such lengths for her.
"Quiet," Inuyasha growled at him reflexively.
Later that day as Joken and Ah-un snoozed and Rin picked some flowers Inuyasha tried to head toward the village. He was surprised when he found that he was blocked from going that way. It was as though when he got a certain distance his body just refused to move anymore. He sighed he but he was that worried whatever did this to him wasn't harming him and the only things he couldn't do was go back to the village and reveal his true identity. All in all it wasn't that bad once over the initial shock of the matter and apart from the fact that Sesshomaru was in his body (he hoped as that was better than the alternative) at the moment. He also knew that the emotions he had were being witnessed by his brother and he became embarrassed when he thought about it so he decided not to think about it anymore. Slowly he walked back to where the others were and he sat at the base of the tree and closed his eyes slipping into an effortless doze.
"Father," he said in a young voice as he looked at the magnificent demon that was his father.
The older demon turned around and looked at him with kindness shining through his golden eyes.
He knew that he would never see his father again because he was going to rescue that human woman and her mutt of a son. Sesshomaru felt anger at his unborn half-brother it was his fault that the great dog-demon that was Father would be gone forever.
Inuyasha woke quickly. The dream had been so clear that it must have been a memory. Shesshomaru had cared so deeply for Father it as no wonder that he harbored animosity toward the one that was responsible for the death of the great dog demon.
Inuyasha took a deep breath and wondered what more he would learn as this experience went on.
Since there was no work for Sesshomaru to do he decided that he would take a nap since he felt quite tired. Was it perhaps that Inuyasha was sleeping poorly? When he told Kagome where he was going she insisted that he nap in their hut. So together they went to their hut and he lay down on the spot that had the most of Inuyasha's scent. When he began to drowse he was surprised that Kagome took his head into her lap and began to stroke his head and every now and again she would rub at the base of his ears.
He dreamed that he was small. Very small and he felt so helpless and sick with grief. He realized that this must have been a memory of Inuyasha's childhood. He often got attacked by demons. Some wanting to strengthen themselves others wanting to destroy an abomination. He always was able to get away though he got hurt a lot.
The humans that he passed threw things at him and called him a devil. Then he saw the day that they met each other. Inuyasha had been little more than a teenager, really he was little more than a child. Sesshomaru had been angry and had despised the fact that he shared blood with the half-demon. Of course Inuyasha hadn't known that and had tried to make his brother like him. Inuyasha was jealous that his brother had known their father but he was happy that at least he would get to know his sibling.
Sesshomaru did not need to see what happened next because he remembered the day from his perspective that was the first battle he had had with his brother. That's why at that moment he woke up. He sat up quickly and the sudden movement shocked Kagome awake.
For the first time in a very long while Sesshomaru felt ashamed of himself. He hadn't known that the humans had hurt his brother he also hadn't known about all the demon attacks. He was aware that Izayoi had died when Inuyasha was quite young of course but he hadn't known that, that had left Inuyasha all alone with nobody. it would have been so easy for him to find out but the fact was he hadn't cared after all Inuyasha was a useless half-breed that had spelled the end of his Father. The heart inside him beat faster as he read the emotions that were attached to the thoughts of him. Jealousy, anger, disappointment, betrayal, and fear. Oddly enough he found that he was not hated by Inuyasha and he understood that to be because of issues with Inuyasha's opinions of his self-worth. Part of Inuyasha believed that he did not deserve acceptance and at the heart of that belief was their first meeting. That was the proof that not even someone related to him could ever care for him.
Kagome went up beside her silent husband and asked softly, "Did you dream about your past again?"
Sesshomaru nodded. He was in too much pain to speak. Pain both from the memories of Inuyasha and the idiotic stubbornness of himself.
Kagome understood when he didn't speak and just gently caressed his head and said nothing when the tears began to fall.
thanks for reading. ^_^
It will be continued soon. comment if you have any ideas for it or if there are some things that you just wanna say. constuctive critism is welcome.
point of view switches sorry if there is some confusion.
Edit 12/7/13 changed a little bit and added breaks. Also I forgot about this fic and wanted to continue it now that I have been reading/watching a lot of Inuyasha.