Disclaimer: I don't own them.
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The moment he saw Summer's face, he knew. It didn't matter that his own cell phone rang just moments later. He barely registered his display flashing "Dad". All he could hear was Ryan Ryan car accident very bad Ryan hurt. Yes, somewhere in there was the word "Marissa" but his brain skipped right over it, choosing instead to focus on the horror of Ryan car accident hurt.
He ran into Summer's en suite bathroom and vomited. And then he headed for the door with his girlfriend hyperventilating as she followed.
He doesn't remember driving to the hospital. All he remembers is hugging the toilet at Summer's and then Bam! His Dad's eyes, his Mom's tears and the aching wait for word. Word showed up in the form of a frazzled Doctor with a look on his face. Seth hated the look instantly.
Dr. Frazzled took Julie and Dr. Roberts into a side room and closed the door. The anguished wail came almost immediately after, and he was surprised he even registered it, let alone Summer's form slumping against him. His arms went around her on reflex; every other part of him was focused on the room had apparently just announced Marissa's death.
(Dead, Marissa's dead? I should...I should really be...Ryan. What about Ryan?)
He did not want to see his parents go into that room, so when Dr. Frazzled came out and approached his parents he almost blocked the man's way. Would have, if it hadn't been for Summer still clinging to him.
(Summer, is she okay? What does she want me to do? Should I be rubbing her back or something?)
If the Doctor couldn't get to his parents he couldn't tell them that Ryan was dead.
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Someone was calling his name, that much he knew. Was it Marissa? Was the ambulance there? They had to take her first, he was fine. He tried to tell them he was fine.
"Ryan, sweetie. We're here. Maybe you're not ready to wake up yet, but we're here."
No, no he definitely wasn't ready. A deeper sound next.
"We're just going to talk to the staff Ryan, insurance issues. I promise we'll be back as soon as we can."
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(Where did Summer go?) Something inside him knew she had gone home and missed her presence, but he had no idea when she had actually left or what she had said, or more importantly, what he had said. Where the hell was his brain?
(Ryan...he might wake up soon.)
Oh. That's where his brain was. But now that he knew Ryan was okay, shouldn't the fog have lifted? Seth curled himself into the orange cotton chair that sat beside Ryan's bed. Some part of him wondered at a hospital in Newport Beach having such a relic from the 70s. The major part of him wondered at the fact that in mere seconds his best friend, his...his Ryan... could have been taken from him.
The thought made his stomach revolt and it took all he had to keep things down. Instead, he buried his head in his knees and sobbed like a five year old.
(Way to be a man, Seth.)
His shame only made him cry harder, and he gave up trying to fight it. Tears meant he was still alive, breathing.
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He couldn't tell right away what the noise was. It sound far away, muffled. Marissa wasn't talking to him anymore, she had gone silent what felt like many hours ago. He kept talking to her anyway, maybe he would eventually ask a good enough question, say the right thing to make her wake up and talk to him.
Whoever it was, his brain was functioning enough to tell him that they weren't happy. Had he done something wrong again? No, they weren't angry. They were...
Crying. Someone was crying. He focused all his strength on opening at least one eye and focusing. It took longer than he expected. What he saw when he accomplished his goal ground the already broken pieces of his heart into dust. Seth. Seth is hurting. I have to do something, but he's so far away.
He reached out his hand to breach the distance.
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Seth nearly jumped out of skin and through the ceiling when he felt the hand on his foot. He raised his head so fast he didn't even have time to stop crying or wipe his face on his sleeve. Ryan wakes up from near death and he's faced with a puffy-eyed snot-faced Seth.
(Bet you're glad to be alive now, huh buddy?)
"Seth? What's wrong?"
Seth laughed out loud in a way that even he knew sounded hysterical.
"Ryan, there was a car accident on the way to the airport." A blank look from Ryan and a nod.
"Yeah."
("Yeah"? That's it?)
He leaned forward, an unconscious movement that emphasized his emotions. "I – we almost lost you, Ryan. I was so scared."
"Yeah." This time a whole sentence in one word, Of course. Ryan must have been terrified himself.
"I guess it just hit me. All of it, that it could have been so much worse, but you're here. You're not --" He broke off as the tears started again, and he dragged the back of his hand across his eyes. Ryan's hand squeezed his foot, a small, almost amusing, gesture of comfort.
"Seth? Marissa – she." And now he could see twin tears in Ryan's eyes, though Ryan wasn't the crying type. "Is she...?"
"Ryan, I'm not sure..."
"Please, Seth. I'm asking you." It was a whisper, but Seth was sure he heard an emphasis on the last word, and understood that Ryan was asking him because right now he needed someone he trusted, someone who would be honest with him.
"She, she died, Ryan. I'm so sorry." The worst thing in the world happened then. (Well, the second worst thing.) Ryan started crying. Noiseless, body shaking, tears. Seth did the only thing he could think of, he grabbed Ryan's hand from his shoe and laced their fingers together, his turn to offer comfort.
A few seconds later he desperately wished he had jammed his free hand in his pocket, or sat on it, or something. Because a few seconds later he had leaned forward and was softly brushing the tears off Ryan's face with his thumb.
He had a brief moment of absolute horror at his actions before feeling the small shift in movement from his friend. If he weren't out of his mind with grief he'd think that Ryan was actually leaning into his touch.