hi my name is emerald kris and I am in the car driving to a new place called south park. my dad was beating my mom for seven yrs and so we both left with what little money we had. Apparently south park had cheep houses and stuff so were going there.

I was in the back seat texting on my old iphone 2 and readjusting my ragedy coat on my shoulders. My one friend who was back in the town we left from could not come with us even tho his mom was an alcoholic and abusive. His name was shadow and he was rly kewl.

We got into town and mom parked our sedan into our new house. It was right next to a green one. Right away I got out of our car and busted through the door and went up into my room which was the biggest one. It had a roof with glass on it so that I could see the depressing wether outside. I closed my door and shoved my earbuds in my ears. I listened to 'Rude' by Magic!. It was the video verson so that I could see the cute lead singer.

Then mom canme into my room.

"Emerald theres a boy here to talk to u."

"Tell him I don't wanna talk and that im busy"

"Emerald…"

"Okay mom for gods sake"

I went downstairs and opened the door. There was a relly cute guy there wit ebony hair and icy blue eyes. He smiled at me and asked to come in and I said okay.

"Hi my name is Craig Tucker. I'm ur neybor."

"Eat a dick-wiggle you buttleicking hore."

"But I think ur totealy cute n stuff"

"Rly im so ugly tho"

"No ur not I love u"

And then he kissed me and the world stopped and I had to stop and catch my breath because he was so hot and stuff.

"Ur pregnant now" he said.

"No way how we only kissed"

"Yea but im actually a vampire and stuff and so I have magic to impregnan u."

"We have a baby. I want to name him tho cause u made him."

"Okay love" he said.

"Im naming him draco like that guy from harry potter."

"I love that books"

"I do to"

Then craig said he was too hot so we walked outside and it was very cold because we were in soth park and it is cold there and always snowing. And then a rely twitchy kid came up to us and started talking about underpants gnaomes. I was pretty sure that God put him on the earth to be a living, breathing vibrator.

"Hi who are u" he asked sweetly

"My name is emerald and I am pregnant with his baby now because he kissed me and hes a vampire"

"O rly? That's a shame because I was just gonna ask u out for coffe. Im tweek" He said.

I said okay and then a big aura shot from the skyh and a boy was there in a firey light (If u cant picture it its like that aura thing from dragon ball z when goku goes super sayan) and he had a orange parka on.

"u again!" craig screamed

"yes and now im gonna kidnap ur girlfriend because she is hot" he said

"no ur not because none of u kno my tru powerz." Tweek growled screaming and then his hands exploded in fire. He through the fire at the parka dude and he dodged. Tweek saysd that he loved me and then we kissed.

"now the baby is gone. I aborted it" he said

"how"

"because im actually a bender like the avatar and so I blood bended it and choked the fetus with ur umbilicle cords."

"oh kewl"

"now I gota kill these fagots" tweek snarled intensely

Then craig screemed and lurched forward with his vampire speed and then attacked tweek and then tweek bloodbended him and since vampires only eat blood and are made of blood and stuff tweek had full control of him. Thn tweek impaled him on a telephone pole and craig cried bloody blood teers and he died.

And then Kenny attacked tweek and tweek used his fire hands to choke kennyh and then he died.

"oh my god they killed Kenny!" said someone from the distance

"u bastards!" said someone else.

Then tweek kissed me again and told me he loved me and I cryed so hard because he just killed my baby and my babys father.

"its okay my love because we can make another one" he said

"rly?" I asked with tears in my eyes cuz I was so happy.

"yea I have a dick and it is fully functional thank u."

"ok kewl lets make another one"

"ok"

Then we did the nasty and stuff and 9 months later we had a baby together and I didn't want to name him draco since my other baby that died was named draco and that was too painful so I named him Dahvie Vanity (if u don't know who he is then get the fuck out). And then tweek kissed me again and we lived happily ever after the end.

PLZ NO FLAMERS THIS IS MY FIRST SOUT PARK STORY AND I AM SO PROUD OF IT SO DON'T FLAME OKAY U NOOBS. LOL REVIEW A LOT!