Kurt looked through the tall and tipping stack of magazines. He flipped through the pages of a 'Seventeen'. He didn't read any of the articles, he was honestly just looking at the pictures right now.
He had been doing his daily magazine reading routines this way for about 3 months now. Ever since he found out Blaine had cheated on him. Not really found out, but walked in on them.
Blaine swore to Kurt he was just drunk and it had been the mistake of his life. "Yeah, you got that right." Kurt mumbled under his breath, looking at more colorful and happily portrayed men and women on ads about every other page.
He pressed his finger to a nice and well groomed man on the clean page. The man was wearing a nicely pressed suit, a long sleeved collared dark blue button up with all the buttons buttoned.A light gray vest was buttoned by a single button over that. A light pink tie was fastened to his neck, tucked into the vest. Black skinny jean style dress pants were worn along with Converse brand shoes.
"Blaine would of loved that." he mumbled to himself. He slid the harshly pressed finger to the fancy dress suit next to the man on the page as well. "And that one." Kurt sighed and closed the magazine, slapping it on the top of the stack of magazines he had.
He stared at them intensively. He only had so many because most of them were Blaine's. He'd bring them over, excited and eager to show Kurt the new ones he'd found on the break room table at his old job.
He'd sit right in the middle of Kurt's bedroom floor, where Kurt was now but beside him and flip through all the new ones with him. It was one of the many things they did together.
Did.
If Kurt looked beside him on the floor real quick, he'd swear he saw Blaine smiling and giggling, showing Kurt every outfit he thought he'd look great in. Blaine always thought he looked great in everything he wore, so it didn't matter what he may have showed him.
While Kurt looked over all the unorganized stack of magazines almost slipping into total memory, he saw something paper-like stick out between a 'Cosmopolitan' and another 'Seventeen.'
He raised one dark brown thin eyebrow as he reached for the edge of the thing. It felt paper-like as well. As he pulled it all the way out and held it delicately in his fingers he realized what it was.
It was a picture.
A Polaroid picture.
Of Blaine.
The picture was him looking off in some different direction. Kurt remember the exact moment instantly the picture was taken. He had pictures of Blaine like this scattered all over his room.
Under his bed, in his drawers and all over his desks and such. He had so many like this- Blaine caught off guard but still as beautiful as ever. Kurt didn't have nearly any of Blaine looking at the camera unless it was a picture of them together.
Kurt had always been taken pictures of him. When he wasn't looking so he didn't have a chance to protest. Still, he looked as elegant and beautiful.
In some pictures Blaine cracked a slight smile which led Kurt to wonder if at times, he knew he was taking pictures of him. He never asked about the pictures or hinted at anything about it.
Kurt felt a solid, clear tear push it's way out of his crystal blue eye and roll down his cheek. Some people had asked why he was always taking pictures of him.
He remembered the answer he gave everyone every time they asked.
"I'm always taking pictures because I don't want to miss a thing." he whispered, studying the picture better than he studied notes in class. A couple more tears rolled down his rosy, warm cheeks as he planted a sweet and soft kiss on the picture of Blaine,sliding it in between the magazines where he found it.
He even made it stick out disorganized and easy to spot like it was before he picked it up.
He climbed up onto his bed and wrapped himself in covers, up to his chest, his arm curled out of the blanket and his hands together and flat supporting his cheek against the pillow.
He sniffled loudly. Nobody was in the house. Nobody heard. He felt like Blaine was behind him, curled against his body tightly like he used to when Kurt would cry before bed.
He often would, remembering his past years of being bullied. He felt like Blaine was kissing his ear and neck softly, whispering sweet things to him.
Things like 'It'll be okay.' and 'It's alright' and 'I'm here.'
But he wasn't.
All he had of Blaine was all his pictures. He flickered his puffy wet eyes to his desk across from the foot of his bed. Sitting upright there and visible to him when he strained his neck a little was another picture of Blaine.
But this one was different.
It was one of the few that Blaine left him with of them both. It displayed Kurt with his arms wrapped tightly around Blaine's neck and Blaine's two large hands on each side of his delicate face,pushing his lips into his own.
It was honestly one of Kurt's all time favorite pictures of them two together. Maybe, he likes to think, that's why Blaine didn't take that particular picture of them.
The picture caused tears and pain to him but still he couldn't stop looking at it. Admiring the passion in their expressions. How breathless he looked on Blaine's lips.
How into the kiss Blaine looked.
All Kurt had was his pictures, and sometimes-
just sometimes..
Kurt felt like he really wasn't missing anything. He felt like Blaine was still right here with him, making even more memories for even more pictures.