The silence of the hotel room was almost stifling, the sound ringing in Tim's ears. Jay had pulled up the desk chair to the window, sitting in it with his knees drawn up to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs like a child. He had been staring out the semi-parted, maroon curtains for over an hour in a blank stupor that Tim couldn't bring himself to break. It was nearly ten o'clock and Tim considered turning on the television, muting it for something to look at, to distract himself from the unbearable silence. Tim cleared his throat slightly, half hoping that Jay would acknowledge his presence if he did so. Jay continued his silent vigil of the parking lot, and Tim shifted his position on his hotel bed, folding his arms against his chest and staring up at the ceiling. "Huh." Jay said, almost too quiet to hear. Tim dragged his eyes away from the cottage-cheese pockmarks and looked at Jay. He hadn't moved, but Tim was sure that he had said something. "Jay?" he questioned. "It's Christmas eve." Jay said, still looking out the window. Tim blinked in surprise, watching Jay for a long moment. "Well how about that…" Tim breathed, more to himself than Jay, turning his head away. "Happy Christmas…" he said, his tone flat. Jay did not reply.
Tim frowned up at the ceiling. Christmas wasn't important, it was just another date, like all holidays. Just an excuse to get together with family and friends, give gifts, relax. Tim couldn't remember the last time he had done any of those. Christmas had always been his least favourite holiday for as long as he could remember, not that the hospital hadn't tried. Starting in December, the doctors always incorporated making paper chains into each child's therapy session, and they hung them up in the hallways and doorways for decoration. Children were allowed to help decorate the multitude of trees dispersed throughout the halls, and everyone was given a small, desk sized tree for their room. The doctors only made the mistake of letting him have a tree once. He had crushed five glass bulbs in his hands before the nurses caught him. He had needed stitches for that stunt. He didn't celebrate Christmas again, not until college, when Brian would talk him into coming to holiday parties with him, persuading him to put on a hat and drink a glass of eggnog. "It's Christmas, Tim! Come on, you have to smile a little, bud!" Brian would grin, capering around in his gaudy sweater, Santa hat askew. Tim would, just for him. Brian loved that. But that was before all of this, before his life unraveled again. He didn't even know if Brian was alive. 'Relax' was a foreign word. Living to see another day was a gift. Holidays were just days.
Jay stirred in his chair, putting his feet on the floor slowly, stiffly. He looked away from the window, blinking rapidly. "I should call… I should call my parents." he said finally. Tim nodded. He had never asked about Jay's parents, and in turn, Jay had never asked about his. There wasn't much to say about his parents. Tim felt no need to call. They wouldn't call him either. Jay stood up slowly, approaching the landline on the nightstand next to his bed as if in a trance. He sat down on the edge of the bed, reaching his hand out toward the phone and stopping halfway. His hand hovered there in midair for several minutes, Jay watching it expectantly. "I'm not sure I quite remember…" Jay trailed off, muttering words that could have been anything. The number? His parents? Tim didn't ask, less it evoke some painful memory. "I think I'll go to bed now." Jay said, his voice on the edge of tears. He didn't even attempt to look at Tim as he kicked his shoes off and crawled under the starchy hotel sheets, still in his jeans. Tim turned the lamp between them off, the room plunging into darkness, aside from the swath of parking lot light from the still parted maroon curtains. Tim could make out Jay's shape, curled up under the sheets, and wondered if this was the first Christmas that Jay had spent away from family and friends. He didn't count as a friend. Tim sat up, watching Jay breathe in and out, falling asleep. Quite suddenly, Tim had an idea. An idea that he could easily picture Brian grinning at, which made Tim sneak out of his bed, slipping on his shoes and coat as quietly as he could. Tim paused, hand on the doorknob, looking back at Jay. He hadn't stirred. Outside, it had started to snow.
Jay opened his eyes, blinking at the bright white light that streamed in through the open curtains. It had snowed overnight, maybe a quarter of an inch, enough to cover things. Jay grinned a little to himself. It wasn't often that it snowed. Stretching, Jay sat up, looking instinctively to the bed on his left. The top of Tim's head, hair sticking out wildly, was just visible amongst the pillows and blankets. Jay attempted to move to the edge of the bed, swinging his legs to the side. His foot hit something solid, making Jay jump. Slowly, he peered down at the end of the bed. There, wrapped badly in what appeared to be a copy of the Free Press, was a rectangular shaped package. The last package that Jay had received was the tapes of Alex and Amy, but that had been left outside his hotel room. Had someone broken into the hotel room overnight just to leave this on his bed? Curiosity got the better of Jay and, cautiously, he picked up the package. It was clumsily done, with duct tape and whole sheets of newspaper. Jay removed it easily, sliding the wrappings off. Inside was a whole package of 6 new tapes, unopened from the looks of it. Jay flipped the tapes over, checking for tampering, the plastic wrapping crinkling in his hands.
Tim stirred, wincing at the harsh light that the snow cast. He froze when he saw Jay awake, before sitting up eagerly. "Someone left tapes in the room last night." Jay started immediately, holding the package up as proof. "I don't know how they got in, the room was…" Jay trailed off when he noticed Tim, grinning, which was not an appropriate reaction at all to the news of a break in. "Tim?" Jay started, confused. Tim's grin widened. "Happy Christmas, bud." he said, running a hand through his hair. Jay stared at him stupidly for a moment, the words not registering. "You….you snuck out in the middle of the night? And bought me...bought me tapes?" Jay stammered. Tim nodded, still grinning, apparently loving his reaction. "Do I even want to know where you got the tape?" Jay asked, smiling despite himself. "I wouldn't." Tim beamed, and Jay beamed back. "You're an idiot, you know that, right?" Jay said, looking down at the tapes in his hands. A gift. "I didn't get you anything." Jay said quietly, glancing back up at Tim, who had stopped grinning. "You don't have to!" he said quickly, "Although, if you want… you could go get me breakfast. So I don't have to move." he added, upon seeing Jay's face. Jay sighed, the smile returning. "Fine, just this once. It's Christmas, after all."
