Lover Becomes Nemesis
SLASH! Lex/Clark. Will turn graphic so turn back now if that's not your thing.
Summary: A look into how a realtionship and marriage between Clark and Lex could have been. AU and all that.
Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN SMALLVILLE OR CLARK AND LEX. Written for fun!
XxXxXxX
What was it that brought Clark Kent and Lex Luthor together?
Fate? Destiny?
At the beginning there was just this special friendship, almost like brothers. But it grew into something more, something a bit more complicated.
Heated feelings rose between them.
By seventeen Clark lost his virginity. Lex had been his first.
Lex had asked him if he was sure, if he really wanted to do it.
Clark hadn't been sure. Something inside of him was sure that he shouldn't do it, that he should have stopped it before it went too far.
But Clark had nodded silently and then been taken by Lex. He'd been really quiet afterwards and had left as soon as Lex had fallen asleep.
They hadn't acknowledged it, Lex had given him time, he had been prepared to give Clark all the time he needed and in the end Clark had made a decision.
He hadn't said anything, just fidgeted while Lex looked at him with raised eyebrows, then Clark's hand had curled around the bald man's neck and he had kissed him carefully.
Lex almost drowned in the chastity that was Clark Kent.
Lionel was happy for the couple, he loved Clark more than he loved Lex by now. But he was a bit suspicious and it wasn't that strange. Lionel always questioned everything Lex did, he was, after all, the one who knew Lex the best.
The hardest bit was for Clark to tell his parents, especially his father since he'd never liked Lex or the Luthor family.
But Clark amazingly stood by his choice, he told his parents he needed to be with Lex, that he meant too much for him now to just let go.
His father warned him about his secret, that Lex was still himself and he'd try to solve the mystery about Clark Kent whatever he did.
Clark knew this was true, but he'd deal with it.
The relationship was now another reason for Jonathan Kent to dislike Lex. He didn't like the age difference, Clark was even underage. He didn't trust the Luthor's and he didn't trust Lex, but what was he supposed to do?
He didn't want to upset Clark. But he wasn't nice to Lex, and when they were alone he could sometimes question his motives about Clark, what he was planning.
Lex wouldn't answer the question he would just make some smart ass comment and make Jonathan even more angry and suspicious of him.
Lex didn't care. The man should only know what Lex did with his son at night.
XxXxXxX
When Clark's father died, Lex wasn't sorry. He was sorry that the man hadn't lived to see him marry his son, he'd relish in the look on his future father-in-law's face. He had wanted to look Jonathan straight in the eye when Clark walked down the aisle and smirk. He had won.
Lex held Clark's hand tightly during the funeral. He wanted to know what the teenager was thinking and again he thought of Clark as a mystery.
He knew Clark was devastated, the only thing he could do was trying to be there for him.
Months later Lex went down on one knee, telling Clark how much he loved him and wanted him to marry him.
Clark said yes.
This time he hadn't been sure either, but again he had said yes. There was something about Lex that made Clark say yes to everything even though he wasn't sure he wanted it.
All his friends were at their engagement dinner, his mother sat next to him and Chloe on the other side. Both Lois and Lana were there.
Lana was happy for Clark, they had a past, but she had moved on and was happy for Clark.
Opposite to Clark, long way down on the other side of the table, sat his soon to be husband. Lex wore a secure smile, and Clark had the feeling Lex knew exactly what was going to happen. Clark didn't know and that made him feel a bit insecure, he wondered if it really was the right choice.
He was very quiet during that dinner while he listened to everyone talking around him.
Clark was about to marry someone who didn't really know who he was, didn't know his secret and he feared he'd never be able to tell Lex about it either.
Lex caught Clark's eyes and held his gaze for a long while.
They both wanted Jonathan Kent sitting by the table, but each for whole different reasons.
After a while Lex got up from his seat and had a speech were he told everyone about his love for the younger man.
Clark just smiled.
XxXxXxX
Lex had a whole bunch of papers Clark needed to sign after the wedding. He tried to convince Clark that he trusted him, but it was just for both their sakes that he had to signed the papers.
The younger man didn't read the papers, he just signed them quickly by his own in the mansion.
Lex had quickly left for a business trip. No, Clark hadn't suspected any honeymoon for them.
He hadn't asked Lex why he had to go, he had just let him.
When Lex finally came back, he greeted his husband with a hot kiss. He told Clark he had missed him, Clark wasn't sure he told the truth.
XxXxXxX
Clark had interrupted Lex when he worked in his office before, but now was different. He used to look at Clark like he was telling him he had everything under control. It was a look that told him he was busy, but he'd listen anyway.
Sometimes Clark didn't even bother, he just left again claiming he didn't want anything. Whether Lex believed him or not, he didn't know.
Clark went to bed earlier than Lex, his husband always stayed up and worked. Worked with things Clark didn't get to know about, stuff Lex claimed was nothing important, nothing he'd be interested in.
Clark was usually still awake when Lex went to bed late at nights. Sometimes he turned to face Lex and waited for him to lean in and kiss him deeply and take him to higher places, sometimes he pretended to sleep and waited for Lex to simply kiss his cheek and then go to sleep.
You learn a lot of watching someone sleep. Lex slept like a baby.
Clark had thought things would be easier when they had gotten married, but to him everything just seemed more complicated.
You learned a lot of being a part of the Luthor family. You were always watched, you had to learn to watch your back and always take care of things. Clark knew he was always watched.
But he managed to keep his secret hidden anyway. Though questions always popped up from Lex asking him how he managed to get to a certain place so fast, how he could always be there for his friends to save them when needed.
The lies grew between them.
Chloe was the first one to ask him how he actually felt. He was married to the billionaire Lex Luthor, the man determined to find out his secret and obsessed with the meteors and what they meant. Almost everything Lex did was shady.
Clark told his best friend he was fine. She would be the first one to know if he wasn't. He assured her that.
She believed him.
XxXxXxX
"Clark. I didn't expect you to be in here", Lex said as he walked into his office. His husband sat by the fire, golden light sparkling in his eyes.
"I'm sorry I was late. I had a meeting with Dr. Amblin."
Clark didn't say anything, he continued watching the fire. All these people Lex worked with, he got introduced to them, but it was all just business, he was just something Lex could show up.
"Clark?"
Lex walked over to where the younger man was sitting and sat down next to him.
None of them said anything, they were just staring at the fire in silence. Lex waited for Clark to tell him what was wrong, he knew he would break eventually.
"What are we doing?"
Lex had been right.
"What?" he asked.
Clark was quiet again, probably thinking over what to say. "What are we? What are we doing? What does our relationship mean?"
Lex frowned slightly and watched the man. Clark continued staring at the fire.
"What do you mean?"
The brunette shrugged lightly. "Have this been the right choice? You and me? Are we supposed to be together?"
"Why are you asking this now?" Lex wanted to know, confused.
Clark was quiet again, this time he wasn't gonna answer. He remembered how it used to be, before they were married, before they were a couple. It had been different.
Lex looked away from Clark, followed his gaze into the fire. "I love you, Clark. You mean everything to me."
"Those words are very easy to say."
"What? You don't love me?"
Clark hadn't been prepared for that question. Again he took his time to answer.
"I love you", he stated in a whisper.
Was he telling the truth or was this just another time when he wasn't sure of his feelings, but told Lex what he wanted to hear anyway? Clark had no idea.
XxXxXxX
It wasn't easy to sneak out of the mansion and run of to be a hero. Clark knew about the surveillance, had asked Lex many times why they needed it.
For safety, Lex tried to explain, but Clark didn't believe it. He sometimes felt like a rat in a cage being watched all the time. He wondered if Lex sat by some monitor when he wasn't around and waited for Clark to do something unusual.
Maybe he was being paranoid, but he knew Lex, better than anyone. Better than Lionel.
"Can't you see what he's doing to you? He's holding you back", Chloe exclaimed.
Clark was strangely quiet.
"Do you know about the 33.1 project?" she asked him with calmer voice, but much more serious.
Clark squirmed, he didn't want to answer that.
"This isn't you. You're not supposed to be just the husband of Lex Luthor. You're supposed to be a hero."
The little meeting wasn't situated in the mansion, they weren't that stupid. The Talon had once been Lex's, but not anymore.
"He's my husband Chloe, I love him."
"I know, but you can't just turn a blind eye to this. What he's doing is bad."
Clark didn't answer. He knew all the things Chloe said was true, but it wasn't easy to admit.
The brunette took a deep breath and then turned to leave.
"Clark!" Chloe called after him, but he didn't stop or answer.
XxXxXxX
Clark was again in bed before Lex was and he waited for Lex to go to bed too.
When Lex finally did, around midnight, Clark turned to face his husband, locking eyes with him. Nothing was said, they just stared at each other. Clark felt like a stranger was climbing into the bed, this was nothing like the Lex he knew. Or maybe he never truly knew him?
Clark swallowed and lowered his gaze, it was hard to maintain their stare.
They both knew.
Lies, mysteries, secrets, everything was between them and working against them. It was their own fault.
But Clark couldn't tell Lex his secret, never. It was too late to make him understand.
Lex continued staring at him and Clark felt a bit uncomfortable under his eyes, he slowly looked up again and saw Lex lean in.
Clark wondered for a short moment if there was a camera in their bedroom, if someone was watching them like a free porno right now.
He was pretty sure that was a bit too far, even for Lex.
The older man's mouth landed on his and it striked Clark that it didn't feel like before. It didn't feel like his lips melted by the touch, now it was just a burning feeling.
The brunette adjusted a bit and broke the kiss so he could lie a bit more comfortable.
Why did this feel like his first time?
It felt like he was losing his virginity to Lex all over again.
He put the thought aside and entwined his arms around Lex's neck, bringing him closer again. Lex put one gentle hand on Clark's ribs and met his lips again. The kiss was slow, painfully slow, not that Clark minded, he didn't want it fast or rough, he never had.
Lex shifted just a little, sliding his leg in between Clark's as he deepened the kiss further, but still going slow.
Clark wanted to slide his hands down Lex's back, feeling the muscles. He wanted to slide them down Lex's arms and down to his husband's stomach. But he didn't.
His hands remained around Lex's neck. Secure.
It was no shock Lex was dominating the kiss and it was his tongue that entered Clark's mouth and explored it, trying to find new spaces he hadn't massaged with his tongue.
Clark groaned suddenly, the kiss a bit too much and the feeling of Lex's hard on a bit overwhelming.
The kiss broke and Lex started kissing along Clark's neck. Clark started to function again and his thigh between Lex's legs massaged gently against his member.
Lex growled deeply in his throat, sending vibrations along Clark's jaw.
Enough. Clark needed to feel now.
One single hand reached down and pulled at Lex's boxers, the bald man batted the hand away and pulled down his boxers by himself.
Clark was already naked, he liked sleeping with no clothes.
Lex moved that last bit and settled between Clark. He stroked his thighs shortly while studying his husband. He thrusted up against Clark, their cocks sliding together and Lex hissed from the pleasure and buried his teeth in Clark's shoulder.
The younger guy made a small whimpering sound, telling Lex with just that noise that he needed it. He needed him. Lex gave Clark a quick kiss and then reached over to the bedside table and took out the lube from a drawer.
He squirted the liquid in his hand, sat up on his knees and then lubed himself up. The older man pulled Clark's thighs up slightly and lubed Clark's hole gently.
It looked like Clark was about to explode.
Then he put the tube back on the table and leaned down against Clark again, catching a kiss and then settling with Clark's legs entwined around him as he slowly pushed in.
Clark bit down in his lip, he wasn't gonna scream out loud by the pain or the pleasure.
Nothing had yet been said between them and Clark didn't want to be the one interrupting the silence. They didn't talk, but yet they understood everything between them.
Lex started moving slowly, watching as Clark arched his back up against him, trying to get them both closer. It was long, slow, deep thrusts which send lightning through their bodies, making everything feel like electricity. Lex kissed his neck hotly.
Clark's eyes closed and his head shot back in the soft big pillow. He had always loved the softness in Lex's bed. Their bed.
Lex hit his spot and Clark gripped at Lex's back haphazardly, trying to get focus as he could only see double of everything. A few more thrusts sent Clark over the edge with his husband soon following.
Lex pulled out of him, collapsing on his side of the bed. They were both sweaty and panting.
Clark had barely gotten back his control over his breath when he suddenly asked: "What's 33.1?"
Finally he had asked it. He had been the one to break the silence anyway. Of course, Lex always won.
"What?"
Clark could feel Lex's frown.
"I think you heard me."
Lex was quiet for a while, looking up at the ceiling. "Why do you ask?"
"Because I want to know."
"Sorry, Clark, but I'm not telling you", Lex said simply.
It was the end of the conversation and Lex's answer told possibly everything he needed to know.
XxXxXxX
Clark took all the papers he could find about 33.1 and then left. He wasn't gonna be safe anywhere and he'd have to move around quickly if he didn't want Lex finding him.
It was hard, because even though with all those lies, everything that's between them, he still loved Lex and he was sure Lex loved him just as much. Pretty sure.
But things had gone too far, he had to stop it.
He contacted Chloe, told her that he had information about 33.1 and that it was even worse than they'd thought.
"Clark, be careful."
"I can take care of myself."
"You know what I mean", Chloe mumbled.
Clark left and wouldn't come back before he had figured something out.
XxXxXxX
Lex didn't knock on the Kent Farm door, it was old habit just walking right into the house. He knew Clark wasn't there, but maybe Martha knew where he was?
Clark's mother had stopped being Mrs. Kent and turned into Martha the day Clark said 'I do'.
"Lex...", Martha said and took a deep breath, obviously startled by his presence when she entered he kitchen.
"Didn't mean to scare you", Lex said and smiled.
She didn't smile back.
"What are you doing here, Lex?" she asked, the tone wasn't icy or hostile, but she obviously didn't want him there. It made him wonder how much she knew. Did she know Clark had left and why? Or was there something else that made her dislike him?
"Clark has disappeared, I don't know where he is. I thought maybe he told you anything?"
She studied Lex for a short moment, maybe she didn't know why he had left, but she knew that he was gone.
"He hasn't said anything", she said simply and moved over to take out some muffins from the oven.
Lex watched her every movement, knew that she was lying. She used to be such a good liar. He wondered what else she could be lying about.
"You don't know where he is?"
She put down the muffins plate on the counter. "Like I said, Lex, I've no idea where he is."
Martha seemed scared, that made her lie worse. She should be scared, if she wouldn't be his mother-in-law, he would've not stopped to think how far he would go or what he'd do to her just so she would tell him where Clark was.
He smiled and looked down, still, it stung that someone he would call family lied to him. Not that he wasn't used to it. His father always lied to him, and Clark seemed to have taken that up too.
"Okay", he walked to the door, but turned back with a last glance at her before leaving, "Call me if you hear anything from him."
XxXxXxX
After the location for 33.1 gets blown up and Lex has a short encounter with Green Arrow, Lex is almost certain it won't take long before he sees Clark again. And he's right.
Hours later Clark stand in the door to the office, almost looking out of place like the mansion hadn't been his home for almost three years.
"Clark. I never thought I'd see you again", he said. A lie, but he just aimed to hurt.
He glanced down Clark and could see his wedding ring still in place. A smirk crept onto his face slowly. Clark was still his. His husband didn't say anything, he just stood there and looked at him.
Lex wondered why he was there, why he came back. Why leave and then come back again to face him?
"You left", he stated.
"Yes."
Clark had only been gone for about a week, still his voice felt weird to hear.
"Then why are you back?" Lex demanded to know. He wanted to understand what he wanted.
Finally Clark moved, he walked over to the fire place, always drawn to warmth, and then slowly turned to face Lex.
"I can't hide from you forever, can I?" Clark could as well be stating facts.
Would Clark move away if Lex came closer? He decided to try that thought and took a few steps closer to Clark and was almost surprised when he stood still.
"What do you want then? Apology? Make up? Divorce?"
"Why do you say that?"
"I know you took those files about 33.1. I know that's why you left."
"And?"
"I won't apologize, Clark. I won't."
Clark looked away. Had he thought there was some way to redeem him? To save Lex from himself? Lex was only doing what was necessary.
He slowly walked further towards Clark, the brunette almost didn't seem to notice.
"But I still love you, Clark, I always will."
Clark looked up at him. He wasn't gonna say it back to him, Lex didn't expect him to, but he was slowly working his way back in under the surface. It wasn't too late, he could still have Clark.
Lex reached out to his husband, his husband, and stroke his cheek slowly. Clark closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling.
Clark hadn't expected to kiss Lex back when the bald man finally met his lips.
XxXxXxX
"Clark, you can't be serious. Why are you going back to him?"
Chloe was outraged and worried and confused.
There was nothing Clark could say to make her understand. There was nothing he could do.
"He's my husband", he just said like it could explain everything, but she didn't seem to get it. Despite everything he was Clark's husband, bound to love each other 'til death do them apart. He had said yes to that, yes to loving Lex forever and he had a really hard time to just ignore that and let go. And he thought that maybe if he loved Lex enough, cared for him enough and tried to deal with all their problems, maybe Lex could be different.
"You can't save him", Chloe said like she had been reading his mind.
Clark didn't answer.
There was nothing stopping him from saving Lex, he could do it. He thought.
"You can't save everybody. Lex doesn't want to be saved, Clark. You need to understand that. He's a whole new person to the one you married. It's too late."
Maybe Chloe said those things to make Clark understand, to make him do the right thing, take the right decision. But for Clark the words only stung.
How could someone just give up on the love of their life?
XxXxXxX
He pushes and Lionel falls. Lex stares as his father falls.
Murderer, killing his own father. But no one will know.
There's just him at the funeral, Clark isn't there to hold his hand like Lex had held his during Jonathan's funeral.
He hadn't expected him to be there, there was no expecting or making assumptions anymore.
There had been very little talk since Clark came back, very few smiles. It was a very strange thing knowing when someone lied to you all the time.
Sure, Lex was doing the same thing to Clark and he was sure Clark thought the same thing.
It was like a huge space between them. Lies, hurt, betrayal.
Lex doesn't regret anything.
Lionel would have seen it coming. After all these years. He had done it.
Lex suddenly looked up to see Clark coming over there. He stopped by the other side of the grave, not saying anything. Lex was quiet too.
He looked down at the grave again, wondered what his father knew about Clark. Had he known the big secret?
He looked up again and met Clark's eyes. Hurt.
Those piercing green eyes looked back at him and he knew this was it, the moment everything would change. There was no turning back. Everything was lost.
A small smile pulled at the side of Lex's mouth. This was how it ended and how everything would begin.
Clark wasn't innocent, he had hurt Lex just as much as Lex had hurt him. The bald man told himself that when he left, walking pass Clark close, but not meeting his eyes.
None of them looked back.
The next day Lex found divorcing papers on his desk.
Lover became nemesis.
END