Summary: On the night of the Christmas Ball, Harry tries to help Cho come to terms with Cedric's death."I've been a terrible friend, haven't I, Harry?" She choked out, her eyes glistening with unspilled tears. "You're in pain too, yet I've never noticed it."
Disclaimer: As usual, as much as I'd love to, none of the characters belong to me. Property of J.K. Rowling :)
A/N: Hi guys! For those of you who have been following me, or read my other stories before, I'm back from my really really long hiatus! Been really busy with school, but now I have a bit of free time and I've decided to come back and start writing again. I'm embarrassed to say that although my thoughts have matured, I think my writing abilities have deteriorated…oh well, you be the judge.
This was written for HPFC Writing WorldCup 2013.
Blow the Candles Out
The power lines went out
And I am all alone
I don't really care at all
Not answering my phone
Cho was sitting alone in the Ravenclaw common room, her face tilted upwards as she stared at the domed ceiling painted with stars. The crackling fireplace emitted a warmth that enveloped her, yet all she could feel was cold. Numbing cold. The light from the candles flickered before her, casting her pale face in a soft glow, and catching the misty look in her eyes. For the first time in her years at Hogwarts, the airy room decorated in midnight blue failed to provide her with comfort and peace.
Sighing softly, Cho turned her gaze towards the vintage-looking music box in her hands. It was intricately crafted, with a beautiful design on the lid – flowers in soft pastel colours outlined a heart shape, in which the words "Cho Chang" were carved. With slightly trembling fingers, Cho carefully opened the golden clasp that allowed the lid to spring open with a click, revealing a soft interior of rich purple velvet, and two porcelain figurines spinning in the centre.
As she turned the handle of the music box, a soft, tender melody drifted out, bringing back the memories that she had tried so hard to forget.
All the games you played
The promises you made
Couldn't finish what you started
Only darkness still remains
A Year Ago
"Hey."
Cho jumped as a pair of strong arms encircled her from behind, and a flower magically appeared on her lap. She quickly turned her head around and offered the boy behind her a wide smile.
"Hi, Cedric." She closed the book she was reading and her eyes followed his figure as he sat down beside her at the lake. "What brings you here?"
"To see my favorite girl," He smiled as she blushed. "Actually, I have something for you." Rummaging through his bag, he took out a square box wrapped in shimmering silver, and passed it to the dark-haired girl beside him. "I hope you like it."
Curiosity etched clearly across her face, Cho peeled open the wrapping carefully, letting out a soft gasp when she saw its contents. "It's so beautiful." She murmured, as she admired the music box, her fingers sliding across its smooth, polished wooden surface. "This is...amazing. Thank you, Cedric."
"Go on, open it," Cedric encouraged, a big grin plastered across his face. When she opened the clasp, he continued. "See those two figures in there, they're us. And they're dancing." As he said this, he took Cho's hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing it softly.
"Cho, will you attend the Yule Ball with me?"
As she flushed a deep red, Cho couldn't stop the warmth that was slowly spreading through her. "Oh, Cedric, you didn't have to ask. You know I'd love to."
He beamed as he pulled her closer to him, resting his head on top of hers as she cuddled up against him. "I love you, Cho."
Lost sight, couldn't see
When it was you and me
"Cho?" A hesitant voice called out, bringing Cho out from her reminiscing.
With a jolt, she sprang up from the armchair she was curled up in, her eyes widening in surprise as she saw the unexpected visitor. "Harry…? How did you get in?"
"The Ravenclaw common room isn't that hard to get it," He answered a little sheepishly. "Hermione solved the riddle."
"Oh," she smiled weakly. "Hermione again, huh?"
"Look," Harry began, sounding slightly exasperated. "I was really worried about you when I didn't see you at the ball, and I wanted to find you as quickly as possible. There's no way I could get in here if -"
"No, I know, Harry," She cut him off hurriedly. "I was just - oh, I don't know. I always seem to say all the wrong things when I see you."
There was a pause, which dragged into uncomfortable silence. Cho wanted to say something, anything. The silence was getting too thick for her to bear, and she hated the thought that both of them were pretending that nothing had happened between them - as if they hadn't argued, as if their last conversation hadn't ended up with her in tears and running away.
"I-I'm really sorry. For the other time in Hogsmeade," She finally broke the tension, sounding earnest. "I didn't mean to - I don't know what I was thinking..." She trailed off, looking embarrassed.
"No, no, it's OK. And that was my fault, anyway," Harry interceded, then sighed. "I'm not good at this, Cho. I should've understood - that you'd want to bring a closure to Cedric. It was only logical."
"Oh, Harry. I'm so sorry," Cho's voice was barely above a whisper as she spoke, her expression pained. "I know you don't want to talk about Cedric, and I know..I know how horrible it is. But when I'm with you I can't help myself. It feels like you're the only one who'd understand. For all the nights I can't remember, I keep seeing those lifeless grey eyes of his in my dreams. And his face would always be covered in blood. It scares me - I don't know what to do, Harry. I'm so scared. I just want to forget."
She shivered, and a moment later, felt a pair of hands draping a jacket over her shoulders. She pulled it tighter around herself gratefully, and murmured a word of thanks.
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
"Cho, to be honest, I don't think we could ever forget." Harry started as gently as he could. "No, I don't think we should forget. That'd be an insult to Cedric's memory. Even till the end, he was so loyal and honorable that he...wanted us to take the Cup together." Harry was finding it more and more difficult to string his words together as memories from the past year came flooding back to him. "I don't know why he had to be taken away. Maybe he was too good for this world, maybe there's another purpose for him somewhere else."
He paused, then in a quieter voice, continued. "I blamed myself for Cedric's death, you know. Voldemort was after me all along, and Cedric could've lived if not for me."
Cho froze as Harry's words sunk in. Something had only just dawned upon her - he was hurting too, and possibly even more than she was. Heck, he saw him die. How could she have been so blind not to see it? How could she have been so stupid? She mentally kicked herself for always wanting to talk about Cedric, without realising the effect it had on Harry. She was so caught up in her own grief, that she didn't notice that others around her needed comfort too.
"Oh, I've been a terrible friend, haven't I, Harry?" She choked out, her eyes glistening with unspilled tears. "You're in pain too, yet I've never noticed it. I'm so, so sorry. I want to be strong, like - like Hermione, maybe, but I just seem to be constantly crying. I just make everything worse for you."
"Cho, look, it isn't your fault. We all deal with our grief in different ways." He took a deep breath, reaching out to give her an awkward hug and waited until her quiet sobs subsided. "For a while, the guilt of causing Cedric to die was overwhelming, but Ron and Hermione made me see that none of us were to blame for the tragedy. If anything, it just showed everyone just how...how merciless Voldemort is - how terrible a monster we're up against. And I think Cedric's death has made every single one of us even more determined to fight back against Voldemort, to stand united. And now it's up to us to make sure he didn't die in vain."
"You're a strong girl, Cho. You don't give yourself enough credit. You can move past this. And you need to move past this. How else can you fight against Voldemort? How else can we avenge Cedric's death? All your friends - everyone around you - we want to help you deal with what happened. I want to help you. But we can't unless you give yourself a chance."
"How do I do that?"
"By taking the first step." Cho saw a flash of determination in Harry's eyes as he gently remove the music box from her hands and closed its lid, allowing the soft melody to fade into the background.
"Cedric was an amazing person, Cho, and he loved you. He'd have wanted you to be happy - you don't have to feel guilty about being happy without him, because he would never have wanted the source of your pain to be him. I know he's up there somewhere, looking out for you, protecting you - watching you. So you have to live life to the fullest, Cho, to show Cedric that you'll be fine, that he doesn't have to worry about you."
For the first time in a long time, Cho smiled - a true, genuine smile that lit up her face. "Thank you for saying that, Harry. I think...I think I see it now."
"Great. You know, if we hurry, we can still catch a dance or two at the Christmas Ball. As friends." He quickly added, after seeing the hesitant look on Cho's face.
"Thanks, Harry, but well, I-I'd like to spend some time alone, if you don't mind. Tonight has - no - you've given me a lot to think about."
Harry returned her smile. He understood. "If you need to talk, you know where to find me."
Cho watched Harry's retreating figure disappear through the door of the Ravenclaw common room, silently thanking the dark-haired boy again.
She took one last glance at the music box on the table.
I love you, Cedric. And I will never stop loving you. I'm so happy, so thankful for all the memories we've created, for all the joy and laughter you've given me. You've made me happier than I could have imagined. There's always a special place in my heart where you belong, Cedric, and you know that. But maybe I could let myself open up again. Maybe I could learn to trust again. To be happy again. That's what you'd have wanted me to be, right?
I think I'll be alright. She smiled to herself as she blew the candles out, walking towards the spiral staircase that led to the dormitories. Thank you, Cedric, for letting me love you. Thank you for watching over me.
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright
A/N: Inspired by the song "Candles" by Hey Monday. Really nice song, do check it out :)
Originally meant to be a romance between Harry and Cho, but as I wrote this I just didn't feel that they are compatible at all. Let me know what you think! Constructive criticism is welcome and appreciated.