Novella Casting
Wicked: snoring with head down
Kazuya: Wake up pokes Wicked
Wicked: says sleepily five more minutes ma I promise I'll get up this time…..
Kazuya: I SAID WAKE UP DAMN IT!!!!! : /
Wicked: HUH! OO; wipes drool off oh right what are we here for yawns again
Kazuya: Were here to hold casting sessions for your dumb "novella"
Wicked: HEY! This novella isn't going to be dumb.
Kazuya: Whatever rolls eyes
Wicked: Isn't that Jin's line?
Kazuya: Let's just get on with it.
Wicked: All righty then who do we have?
Kazuya: Looks at list Well we got Michelle, Lee, Jin, Julia, Ling, Hwoarang, Bryan,
Lei, Christie, Steve, Craig, King, Jun, Nina, Anna, Paul, Forest, and Heihachi. Why did
you put that old ass fossil here!
Wicked: Well, I need someone who's a really evil.
Kazuya: glares at Wicked Aren't I evil enough?
Wicked: Well…
Kazuya: WHAT! ! ! eyes flashing lighting crackling around fist
Wicked: ; Uh! Michelle Chang please step up to the stage…..
Michelle: steps up Can you give me a few seconds to warm up?
Wicked: Sure! You're auditioning for… looks at her own copy of the page the maid of
the house. Right?
Michelle: Yup
Kazuya: mumbling inaudible insults and playing with arubix cube
Wicked: Gimme that! Throws away arubix cube
Kazuya: Flings machete at Wicked
Wicked: Dodges Nice throw you need to work on your aim though…
Kazuya: I'll take that in mind
Wicked: Michelle are you ready?
Michelle: Yeah
Wicked: Which scene r u doing?
Michelle: Oh I'm doing the scene where I get fired from my old job
Wicked: Hold on need to get the script where the hell is it? Start looking around in
circles Damn it where the? SMACK! script falls her head OW! How did that
happen?!?! looks at Kazuya
Kazuya: What? halo appears on his head Whistles
Wicked: Grabs halo breaks it in half How politically incorrect! ! ! Anyways what page is
it?
Michelle: Page 18
Wicked: Okay!
Michelle: does watery eyes you can't fire me! My mother needs a doctor she's sick!
What will I do with out a job! What's going to happen to my mother! Sobs
Wicked: Wow! That was great! Claps don't you think Kaz… sees him playing game
boy advance Where are getting this stuff! Didn't you watch Michelle perform the scene!
grabs Game boy
Kazuya: Give that back you brat! grabs hold of Game boy
Wicked: No pulls back
Kazuya: Yes tug of war is in place
Wicked: You're here for a reason and that's to help me with casting damn it! Pulls
Kazuya: Well it's not fair! pulls really hard and sends Wicked flying across stage w/ game
boy
Wicked: Sees stars and Planets Well, I hope you're happy you broke the game boy!
shakes off planets and stars
Michelle: Did I get the part?
Wicked: Shore did!
Michelle: Woo Hoo! does peace sign
Wicked: Can you wait back stage please
Michelle: I can do that! Goes back stage
Wicked: So who's next?
Kazuya: hisses out Heihachi
Wicked: Heihachi Mishima please step up to the stage!
Heihachi gets on stage
Wicked: Oh my god!
Kazuya: Shudders
Wicked: WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING... THAT! THAT! DIAPER!
Heihachi: Its not a diaper it's a….
Wicked: I don't give a #$%! What it is! If you're having bladder problems go to a
nephrologist! And wear something decent for once!
Heihachi: Well at least I'm not FOUR EYED!
Wicked: eyes twitch What? Did you say….
Heihachi: I said AT LEAST I'M NOT FOUR EYED!!!
Wicked: LISTEN YOU OLD JACKASS! I'M NEAR SIGHTED DAMN IT! AND…
AND…I at least I…I… ARGH! I'M SO ANGRY THAT I CAN'T THINK OF
ANYTHING! gets rosy cheeks
Kazuya: May I?
Wicked: nods
Kazuya mauls Heihachi
Wicked: Thank you
Kazuya: You're very much welcome.
Heihachi: looks really messed up I'll get you! Both of you!
Kazuya: Shad up upper cuts Heihachi sends him flying out of the auditorium
Wicked: Ugh! It was just so horrible starts sobbing he made fun of my glasses takes
off glasses tear runs down face
Kazuya: Gives Wicked Kleenex It's okay
Wicked: Takes Kleenex Thank you. I just…his butt look like two big Christmas Hams!
Kazuya: Well at least I beat the crap outta him
Wicked: Yeah… listen I'm gonna take a little break right now. Can you take over for me
just a little bit? While I go to the ladies room and freshen up.
Kazuya: most innocent tone Of course! Run along now take a break! Don't you worry
about a thing.
Wicked: That's what worries me. Leaves
Kazuya: smiles evilly Heh. heh. Paul Phoenix please step up to the stage!
Wicked: enters ladies room see Jun Hey Jun
Jun: Hi Wicked
Wicked: So what part are you auditioning for?
Jun: Well, I'm auditioning for the wife of the evil husband she fits my personality she
smart, nice, and caring
Wicked: Yeah I know!
Jun: Aren't supposed to be casting?
Wicked: Yeah but I left Kazuya in charge...wait a minute I left KAZUYA IN CHARGE
OH MY GOD!!! runs out of bathroom
Wicked: Dodges a flying Bryan Whoa!
Bryan: delirious Sheeeee's myyyy cherrry pieeee.....
Jin: Watch out tackles Wicked from on coming axe and knife
Wicked: What the Hell is going on?!?!?!?!!!
Jin: A brawls broken out! Duck!
Both of them duck a duck, duck quacking like crazy
Wicked: Where's everyone?
Jin: In the ring on the stage!
Wicked: What?!?!?!
Jun: Comes out of ladies restroom What's going on?
Jin and Wicked: Duck!
Another duck comes flying towards Jun
Jun: Comes over where Wicked and Jin are taking cover Where's everyone else?
Wicked: in the ring! And I'm going to get to the bottom of this! In front of the ring and
sees everyone beating each other mercilessly Hey STOP IT! No one listens STOP!
Mumbles to herself I'll never forgive myself for saying this Takes in deep breath
TEKKEN SUCKS!
Everyone freezes dead silence in the room and starring at Wicked in disbelief
Wicked: I'm sorry everyone that I had to go to such extremes to shut the lot of ya'. Now.
WHO STARTED THIS!!!!!
Michelle, Lee, Julia, Ling, Hwoarang, Bryan, Lei, Christie, Steve, Craig, King, Nina,
Anna, and Forest: Back away and a beat in up Paul and Kazuya standing alone and
pointing at them they started it!
Wicked: I leave you for one second alone and look what you've done! You ruined my
casting session! Do you want to tell me what you did wrong!
Kazuya: Yeah, I got caught.
Wicked: Grrrrrr that's it that's the last straw!!!!!!! Lunges at Kazuya but Lei grabs
Wicked Lemme at em'!!! Lemme! At Em'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lei: Simmer down now cowgirl!
Wicked: Breaks away from Lei Yells out battle cry and runs but Craig, Lei, and King
hold her down Damn it let me go!!!! Starts screaming
Bryan: Whoa! The girls got a screw loose in her head
Steve: Tell me about it
Kazuya: I think she's lost her sanity…. revenge plan in place she's a threat to everyone
she could kill us all
Wicked: The only person I'd kill right now is you! Says really fast You Purple-Suit-
Worshiping-Egatisical-Conceded-Sneaker-Obessed-PIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kazuya: (thinking: I'M GONNA KILL YOU!) Says calmly See she just said She would
kill me right now.
Paul: Sheesh who wouldn't...
Kazuya: Glares at Paul Anyway I think its best if we put her in a strait jacket put one of
those mouth cases and put her on one of those crazy people gurneys.
Jun: Dear, don't you think that's a little too harsh?
Kazuya: Nonsense Jun besides we're doing what's best for her
Wicked: Still struggling I swear if anyone doesn't stop this there's going to be some
serious ass whoopin'!
Kazuya: Anyone in favor of doing what I proposed say I
Lee, Hwoarang, Bryan, Lei, Steve, Craig, King, Kazuya and Forest: I
Kazuya: All oppose say Nay
Michelle, Julia, Ling, Christie, Nina, Anna, Jun, Jin, and Wicked: Nay!
Forest: It's an even vote!
Christie: No it isn't Paul hasn't voted
Nina: So what's it gonna be broom head I or Nay?
Paul: Well….takes in deep breath It's…
Heihachi crashes in auditorium wall with a panzer
Heihachi: wearing an army hat HAH-HA-HA-HAA!!! I SAID I WOULD GET BACK AT YOU AND I'M GOING TO BRING THIS AUDITORIUM DOWN!!! THAT
OUTTA TEACH YOU NOT TO MAKE ME THE HEAD VILLAIN! YOU FOUR EYE!
Hwoarang: dude what is he wearing?
Lee: shudders "The diaper"...
Everyone ewws in disgust
Heihachi: When will you all learn? Anyways back to demolishing the auditorium!
Wicked: breaks away from being held down starts twitching Heh-heh-heh so you
want to ruin my auditorium ruin my novella sessions more than it already is? Do you?!
Well... let me tell you something ever been chased with a huge sickle?
Heihachi: thinks come to think of it no.
Wicked: Well consider this your first time pulls out huge shiny sickle in a psychotic
tone HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAA! START RUNNING !
Heihachi: yippes and runs while Wicked it hot on his trail
Julia: God who lit the fuse on her tamp...
Ling: Don't even finish that line
Nina: And I thought I HAD PMS problems
Jun: Will someone put a stop to this?
Lee: Okay first of all nobody is going to mess with sickle-wielding maniac unless they
don't have a fear of dying...
Everyone except Wicked and Heihachi stares at Jin and Kazuya
Kazuya and Jin: What?
Heihachi runs to the men's room locks the door
Heihachi: HAHAA! You can't get me here!! It's the men's room!
Wicked: hacks at door sticks her head through the door HERE'S JOHNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Keeps chopping door down
Heihachi: screams like Chris Tucker HELP ANY ONE!!! I'M GOING TO MURDER
BY A FOUR EYED MANIAC!
Jin: I'm not going to save that ol' fart he shot me in the head for cripes sakes
Kazuya: And lets us not forget when he threw me in the volcano and all of those painful
childhood memories
Paul: Then you won't have anyone's ass to kick
Kazuya: Yes I do yours!
Jun: Please, if Wicked goes on a rampage then there won't be a novella and I want to be in
that novella please....
Kazuya: All right, come on Jin
Jin: What do you need me for?
Kazuya: Heh-heh bait..
Jin: Bait! I don't like that sound of that! OO;
Wicked: Still hacking away the last of the door
Kazuya: Hey Wicked! Jin says that you're glasses are sooo thick that you can see into the
future!!
Wicked: Stop hacking away at the door slowly turns at Jin lifts sickle and runs at Jin
Jin: screaming while running This isn't fair!
Wicked takes wild swings at Jin
Kazuya: Anyone got any ideas for trapping the animal???
Nina: Here's net that I have
Lei: Nah that isn't going to work she cut through it with the sickle
Jin: Will you all hurry up! OO; starts throwing things to slow Wicked down
Kazuya: WE'RE GOING AS FAST AS WE CAN!! DAMN IT!!
Jin: running from Wicked Listen I know your pissed
Wicked: OO major eye twitch
Jin: I'm sorry!!!
Wicked: stops running with sickle normal voice Really?
Jin: ; yeah…
Wicked: Oh okay chuckle
Jin: Wha? Oo?
Everyone dumbfounded
Anna: Wait a minute just a minute ago you were trying to kill Jin and all it takes to stop
you is an apology?
Wicked: scratches back of her head Yeah weird ain't it? Sorry it's just that I had to
blow off some steam. Sighs I think we should get back to casting don't you all think so?
Everyone but Heihachi and Wicked: Yeah!
Wicked: And Ah yes diaper man! Get out of my auditorium before I go BUCK WILD ON
YOUR ASS AGAIN!
Heihachi: runs to his panzer and leaves I'm rich and powerful I can make my own
novella
Wicked: Oh Yeah?! What are you going to have next a fan club? That I'll be the day!
Wicked: Well, since the wall's been bulldozed and the fact that most of you beat the crap
outta each other I think it's a good idea that you all get some rest for tomorrow its that
cool with all of you?
Everyone but Kazuya: Woo-Hoo!
Wicked: smiles okay then see ya everyone bright and early tomorrow. Looks at
Kazuya what's wrong with you?
Kazuya: You
Wicked: Growls
next day in auditorium
Craig: It's soo #$%ing cold here!
King: Well duh stupid the walls been bulldozed!
Kazuya: Where in the hell is Jun and Wicked.
Everyone except Kazuya: I dunno shrug
Wicked in Jun come in
Wicked: Hello everybody!
Everybody except Jun: Hi Dr. Wicked!
Wicked: Weird reflex....
Jun: Since it was cold outside we both thought we should bring some cookies and hot
chocolate
Wicked: Oh! And Hwoarang I brought in some "special" brownies for you winks
Hwoarang: Thanx dudette winks back
Jin: What was that all about?
Wicked: Nothing :D here have some hot chocolate, by the way the people who are
supposed to fixed the wall where are they?
Jin: I dunno trying to steal a brownie
Paul: Hey! Here they are!
Wicked: Hey there! So how long do you think the work will take?
Person 1: Hrm I'm a little rusty at walls but I'm a pro at fixing air conditioners.
Person 2: Yup I sure am lets see now I think it'll take us around three days. Green sword
sticks out Bryan sees it
Bryan: Wicked! Starts poking her repeatedly Look! Look!
Wicked: STOP POKING ME!!! grabs a cookie and shoves it into Bryan's mouth, Bryan
starts munching on it
Bryan: Mmm, is this a Grandma style cookie? munches
Person 1 and Person 2: anime sweat drop
Wicked: Okay, so n e way how much do you think this will cost?
Person 1: We'll take an estimate
Wicked: Take your time! starts hearing hooting
Nina: The last cookie is mine bitch! SLAP!
Anna: No its mine! SMACK
Wicked: Grabs cookie Stop it! Didn't you get your fill of fighting yesterday?!?!
Nina and Anna: ……………no................................: /
Wicked: And for the people who cheered them on shame on you! looks at Nina and
Anna And double shame on you too. I'm giving to someone who doesn't even care about
it Gives it to Kazuya
Kazuya: Oooh cookie! spots Paul eyeing it Grabs machete Don't even think
about!
Paul: whimpers
Jun: You want some hot chocolate with that dear?
Kazuya: Yes please O: )
Jun: Here you go hands him a cup of hot chocolate and gives him a kiss
Everyone except Lei, Jin, and Wicked: Awwwwwwwww! :)
Lei, Jin, and Wicked: Oui! rolls eyes dodges a chair compliments from Kazuya
Wicked: Okay everyone! I was thinking last night and I've already cast some people I'll
start with the obvious Michelle- head maid of the house
Steve- bodyguard for leading lady
Jun- Wife of the head villain
Forrest- Cook of the house
Nina- 1st business partner of the head villain
Lee- Uncle of the leading lady and 2nd business partner
Anna- 2nd business partners bitch
Everyone giggles except for Anna
Anna: Frowns not funny Wicked
Wicked continues to read down the list
King- priest
Paul- Mechanic
Craig- Advisor for the head villain
Christie- Cousin of the leading lady
Wicked: Okay I haven't decide on who's going to be the head villain the leading man or
the leading lady…….
Jin, Julia, Ling, Hwoarang, Bryan, Lei, and Kazuya: WHAT?!?!?!?!
Wicked: Kazuya, why did you go what?
Kazuya: Uh…because you don't hurry your slow ass up! That's why!
Wicked: Uh-huh yeah sure, any way who was auditioning for leading man
Jin and Hwoarang: I was
Wicked: slaps herself on the forehead That's what I was afraid of, fine, I'll make this
quick I'm thinking of a # between 1 and 700 can you guess what it is?
Hwoarang: 420?
Jin: 666 covers mouth where did that come from?!
Kazuya: That's my boy! :D
Jun: smack Kazuya upside of the head Don't encourage that!
Wicked: My number was 612 congrats Jin! You're the leading man!
everyone claps except for Hwoarang
Jin: :) thanks Wicked
Wicked: smiles Don't worry Hwoarang I'll have a part!
Hwoarang: Can you make it a good one?
Wicked: Of course! I'll cook up one umm I know snaps fingers how's about the nah
that wouldn't work....
Hwoarang: What?
Wicked: Well… I was going to make the leading lady's cousin boyfriend but I know
Christie would be royally pissed
Christie: Damn straight!
Wicked: So I'll make you the leading lady's brother how does that sound!
Hwoarang: Hella cool!
Wicked: And as an added bonus in the script the brother punches the leading man
Hwoarang: Sweet!
Jun: Wicked I don't want Jin getting hurt
Wicked: Jun Chill! It's going to be fake!
Hwoarang: : /
Wicked: Okay now time for leading lady part and let's see Julia and Ling you're both
auditioning for this part.
Ling and Julia: ;
Wicked: Is it the fact that there a lot of make out scenes the leading man???
Ling and Julia: sweat drop :)
Wicked: Well, I can't choose so Jin you choose
Jin: What me choose!?!?!? I can't!
Wicked: Why ain't nothing wrong with that.
Jin: Yes there is!
Wicked: Yeah you're right you're too soft Kazuya you do it
Kazuya: Me! Lee you do it! And if you don't choose I'll bitch slap you back to Tekken 1!
Lee: Well I um.........uh...
Michelle: sharpens Axe
Lee: squeal faints
Kazuya: This is stupid! Wicked why won't you…
Wicked: Zzzzz
Nina: Look she left a note, its for Kazuya, and one for me and Anna
Kazuya: starts to read Wicked's note I have a headache right now do not wake me up
or you shall feel the wrath of my sickle since Jun is here with you I trust you shall pick the
leading lady for the sake of Lee. I know if he picked Ling. Michelle would be beating his
ass right now. Please be a good leader and behave for my sake…- Wicked. Okay I can do
that.
Nina and Anna: Starts to read note from Wicked To Nina: If Paul tries anything to start
a fight w/ Kazuya please be so kind to kick him where the sun doesn't shine. To Anna:
Don't start a fight with Nina and reframe from hitting on anyone.
Anna: Damn it!
Nina: Hell yes! looks at Paul and grins evilly
Paul: crosses his legs wince Aiiii : (
Kazuya: sighs Okay then I'll just do what Wicked did w/ Jin and Hwoar…Bob I'm
thinking of a number between 1 and 200 guess what it is?
Ling: Uh…150?
Julia: Hrm…….148?
Kazuya: its was 127 well Julia I guess you won
Julia: Jumps up and down I got the part!!!!!!! WOO-HOO!
Wicked: says groggily Ey what the deal I was having a really good nap…..yawns
done?
Kazuya: Julia's the leading lady
Wicked: Oh well that's nice... Ling your Hwoarang's girlfriend.
Ling: That's not fair! I always get pair with that junkie!
Hwoarang: I can hear you! You know! : O!
Wicked: Well deal with it! Julia got the part fair and square! Okay now time to pick the
head villain! looks at list Lei and Bryan step up please…
Lei and Bryan step up
Wicked: Aight, Bryan why do you wanna be head villain?
Bryan: Cuz it would be nice for once to be the main bad ass
Wicked: nods good, good, and by the way I have a pair of boots that match the snake
skin pants
Bryan: Really! Where you get em?
Wicked: Well there a funny story that goes with it! It was in Tijuana when…
Lei: coughs!
Wicked: Oh right, that, okay Lei why do you want to be head villain....rolls eyes
Lei: Blushes well what Bryan said....nervous look
Wicked: Ey! Wait a sec! It's not that! Isn't it?! You're blushing and talking like an idiot!?
Lei: eyes shift yeah it is!!!
Wicked: snatches Lei's script Flips through script Aha! You had the passionate kissing
scene with the wife highlighted which is Jun!
Kazuya: SON OF A BITCH! I'M GONNA KILL YOU! starts to beat the sass out of
Lei Nobody is going to be head villain or smooch my woman except for me damn it!
Wicked: AHA! points at Kazuya SO YOU FINALLY CONFESS! YOU DO WANT
TO BE IN THE NOVELLA!
Kazuya: I didn't say that! shifty eyes and drops a beaten up Lei down Did I?
Everyone except Kazuya: Um-hmm! Yup!
Kazuya: Okay! I do want to be in it!
Wicked: Yay! hugs Kazuya
Kazuya: Ugh! pushes Wicked one step at a time......
Wicked: Right.... sorry looks at Lei ah poor dude you shouldn't have taken it soo hard
on him look at 'em the only way I can tell it's him is by the clothes.
Kazuya: Well no one gets near my Jun except for me grabs Jun
Jun: giggle :)
Bryan: Did I get the part?
Wicked: I haven't decided
Person 2: When do we take the scripts?
Person 1: Not until the head villain is chosen
Wicked: Well, the villain has to be tough and there only one way to solve this
Lei: Gets up How?
Wicked: voice of tone changes Wit a Mississippi Free fo' all!
Everyone except Wicked: Huh?!
Wicked: still with a southern accent its easy when yuz git knocked down yuz gotz to stay
down dat's all.
Kazuya: This ought to be easy...
Paul: I haven't been to a free fo all in a long time! Forget being Mechanic I wanna be the
head villain
Wicked: Fine Paul if it floats ya boat den oh-kay! Now let's let dees fine men step up to da
ring! And place ya bets cus dis free fo' all is getting started! Now da ring rulez are no
martial arts no power ups just a good ol' fistfight! Oh fo' got somethin' rips off
Kazuya's Bryan's Lei's and Paul's shirts off
Paul: How'd she do that? Oo;
All women fighters except for Wicked and Jun: start whistling at Kazuya Ooh baby!
Shake it K-Lo! Take the pants off!! hooting AWOO WOO WOO!!!!!
Kazuya: Blushes in anger That's sexual harassment!
Wicked: Now, now Ladies ya can thank him by placin ya bets
Jun and Nina: scream WE BET 100 ON KAZUYA!!!!!!!
Anna: I BET 90 ON BRYAN !
Ling, Julia, and Christie: 80 ON LEI!
Wicked: Thank u ladies thank you! takes money
Paul: Nobody bets on me....sniff
Forest: sighs grumbles Says flatly 10 on Paul...
Paul: Yeah!
Hwoarang: munching on a brownie Hey Jin want one???
Jin: Well I don't see the harm in having a brownie takes brownie O: )
Ling: snatches brownie away
Jin: Hey! Give that back
Ling: Okay coughs on brownie here you go
Jin: Never mind Hwoarang got n e more
Wicked: Ladies and Gents get ready fo da Free fo all!!!!!!!!!
ding ding
Wicked: Let's get to de smakin!
all four guys circle each other
Lee: starts yellin' like the bags chips seller on 42nd street Get yo' soda! canday! Bee-
ars! I gotta it all here fo cheap!
Julia: Yo Dr. Pepper over here!
Lee throws a D.P. at Julia
Julia catches soda
King and Craig: 2 Cervesas over here!
Lee throws 2 cans of beer
King and Craig: chug down beer and let out a rip roaring belches
Wicked: Oo uh-huh Kazuya smacks Lei down Paul smacks Kazuya, Kazuya smacks
back
And de free fo all has officially started! Lei get outs of ring and passes out Wicked
looks over Lei
Lei: ugh...
Wicked: Forest drag dis po' fella to a chair
Forest: does what he was told
Wicked: Hey Jin Hwoarang Ling gonna make ne bets? OH MY JESUS!
Jin, Hwoarang, and Ling: singing #En el Mar la vida es mas sabrosa! En el mar todo
puedes garra! En el mar la luz y las estrellas! En el mar todo es felicidad!#
Wicked: What the #$%? You ass! Those were for you! grabs Hwoarang and throws
him in to the free fo all ring
Bob gets trampled over
Jin and Ling: Bcuz I got high bcuz I got high la da dat da! take another bite of their
brownies
Wicked: snatches brownies away those were for Bob!
Paul and Kazuya gain up on Bryan
Person 1: Now? Everyone seems to be into the fight
Person 2: No wait
Person 1: Who do you places your bets on?
Person 2: Hmmm I'm bettin on Kazuya you?
Person 1: Ditto
both nod
Bryan: gets knock down
Wicked: Can n e one drag him outta the ring?
Steve: says desperately I will! trying to avoid Anna
Anna: Hey where you going?
Nina: Hey slut leave him alone!
Anna: this isn't any of your business bitch!
Nina: Oh yeah! You're like a bus 50 cents and your ready to ride! : )
Julia, King, Craig, Christie, Jin, Ling, Forest: Ooh
Anna: Well, you're like Chinese food sweet, sour, and cheap! :D
Julia King Craig Christie Jin Ling Forest: Oh!!!
Nina: Rrrrrrr! You're like a bubble-gum machine... five cents a blow.
Anna: slaps Nina
Nina: You bitch!
cat fight in progress
Jun: Wicked! points at Nina and Anna
Wicked: shrugs And your point is???
Kazuya: sends Paul flying out of the ring
Paul: lands on Nina and Anna and smiles toothlessly Hey this isn't so bad.... snuggles
against Nina's chest and grabs Anna's butt
Anna and Nina: Get off! shove Paul off
Paul: You know you like it!
Nina and Anna: nod agreeing both jump Paul
Wicked: gets on the stage De winnah of da Mississippi Free fo all! Raises Kazuya
hand hey your knuckles are bleeding...
Kazuya: Really? Well what do you know...
Jun: My poor baby! You want some iodine on that?
Jin and Wicked: Oui Vey! Dodge a script
Person 2: Now! Smoke screen
Person 1: takes scripts and heads out the torn wall
Person 2: Leaves ransom note
smoke clears
Craig: The scripts are gone!
King: No sht Einstein
Wicked: Hey a ransom note reads If you want to see your precious scripts again name
Heihachi the head villain. That trifflin' diaper wearing depends freak hell no! Hey there's
more reads you will be called in 30 minutes if you don't not respond by then the scripts will be burnt. I ain't gonna give up! This calls for detective work! is about to say Lei but
changes mind..Bryan solve this!
Bryan: I already know who took the scripts
Everyone expect Bryan and Lei: What?
Bryan: Yup, I figured it out when I saw a green sword sticking out of the second person's
suits then the first person said that that she was a pro at fixing air conditioners so it was..
Wicked: Cut to the chase damn it!
Bryan: It was Yoshimitsu and Kunimitsu
Wicked: Now that's what I call detective work!
Lei: Hey I'm awake you know...
Wicked: So I don't car...Aaahhh! falls into a trap door, trap door closes
Wicked: tied to a chair Huh what?
Heihachi: Mwahahahahaaaaa! Make me head villain or your precious scripts are shredded!
Wicked: It doesn't matter if you burn the scripts the story is still in my head so blows
razz
Heihachi: Rrrr you little brat I'll teach you! Dr. Abel bring in "The tapes!"
Kunimitsu: Okay that's just plain cruel!!!
Baek: Yeah, don't you think you're being too harsh?
Wicked: Where did you all come from?
Heihachi: I wasn't the only one who was pissed not to be in the novella so I brought a few
people to help.
Wicked: How many?
Heihachi: Well most of the characters you didn't put in the novella so yeah pretty much
you're outnumbered if you try to escape...
Wicked: Yeah guess so..
Heihachi: Scratches head now where was I?
Wicked: You were talking about something about "the tapes"
Heihachi: Oh yeah, thanks
Wicked: Yeah you're welcome okay go..
Dr. Abel: Here are the tapes
Heihachi: Mwhahah perfect now see if you can survive through this kind of torture! Let's
see what we have laughs evilly On tour with 'Nsync, an Olson Twins marathon, and to top it off an HBO's Live Brittany Spears in Concert!
Wicked: Aaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!
Heihachi: By you're screaming I'm guessing you'd want to watch the 'Nsync tape, okay
is about to put it in the VCR
Wicked: OO;;;;;; Wait!
Hehachi: What? Are you now going to name me head villain?
Wicked: Hell no! I just wanted to say something before I get brainwashed
Heihachi: Yeah what???
Wicked: Depends when you got to go you got to go!
Heihachi: tapes Wicked eyes open that outta teach you! Mwahahaha enjoy the show slams the door
Wicked: OO;;;;
Meanwhile in the auditorium....
Jun: She's gone
Hwoarang: Yeah dude she like whoa! disappeared...
Julia: The trap door is stuck I can't get it open
Kazuya: I know who did this
Lei: Who?
Kazuya: Well who else you drunken idiot! That old fart, come on we got to go rescue our writer back! Who's with me!
Everyone: I am!
Kazuya: Now let's go kick some ass!!!
Nsync tape about to finish: baby bye bye bye bye Bye! screams of girls tapes ends
Wicked: Eyes twitching (I don't know how much I can take….)
Heihachi: Well the tape's done playing now then
Wicked: NEVER YOU PRUNE FANATIC!!!!!
Heihachi: Enjoy seeing Britney Spears! takes out tape and pops in the Britney Spears
tape heh heh enjoy.. slams the door again
Marshall: Number 31
Unknown and Wang: BINGO!
Heihachi: Hey! You guys said you would wait for me!
Bruce: Dude! It's just a game!
Kazuya and the rest of the cast busts in
Kazuya: Give us back our writer damn it!
Heihachi: What! I don't know what you mean?
Ganryu: Hi Michelle!
Michelle: Suddenly I have an itch for hunting and killing something that's wears a
diaper.....
Julia: Heihachi?
Michelle: Something chunky..
Julia: ?
Michelle: Never mind ;
Kazuya: starts to look around Where is she?! Come damn you out with it!
Jin: Correction, you are the damned...
Kazuya: Thinks Yeah, but at least I don't eat special brownies!
Jun: Jin! pinches Jin those were for B..
Hwoarang: Say that and I swear ..
Kazuya: Swear what BOB?! eye glows red
Screams from the other room
Kazuya: That's her!
Heihachi: gets in front of door I don't know what you mean there's nothing in here!
shifty eyes
hysterical screaming
Kazuya: Get the #$% out of the way! Pushes the old uh I mean Heihachi away busts through the door
Britney Spears tape ends…
Wicked: ………..
Kazuya: takes the tape out of the VCR ewww shudders drops tape
Jun: Wicked! unties her
Bryan: shakes her speak to us!
Wicked: ……….. eyes and lips twitching
Julia: Uh-oh
Craig: What?
Anna: She been brainwashed most likely…
Nina: She'll turn into that points at Ling
Ling: reading Teenybopper mag. smacking gum playing with pigtails Hee hee hee what?
Jin: An airhead?
Forrest: Precisely.
Lei: How much time do we have?
Michelle: Not much but…there might be a flipside to this…
Lee: What do you mean?
Paul: You don't mean…gasps
Heihachi: enters the room What the hell are you all talking about?!?!?!!!
Michelle: You idiot! Do you have any idea what you caused! pulls out her axe
Christie: Uh guys! Look!
Wicked: starts to giggle
Julia: It's started! Everyone get out!
Every one except Julia and Wicked: Why?
Wicked: AHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! goes 4rm Wicked to her old self
POOF has kitty ears head band long black nails pulls out sickle
Mwhahahahahahaahaha!!!!!! OO
Kazuya: Everyone get the hell out of here!!!! She's back to Psycho!!!
Wicked: Mwhahahaaaaaa!!!! I want Meow mix I want chicken I want liver meow mix
meow mix please deliver!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAAA!!! start trashing everything
Heihachi: This will stop her! throws pixy stix
Jin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Kazuya: You Eeediot!!!
everyone runs out of the auditorium
Wicked: MWHAHAHAHHAHAH eats pixy stix hyper KITTYGOBOOMBOOM
hits load bearing bar!!.................... Uh-oh. : / auditorium collapse
fog of dust
clears
Wicked: Pops out of rubble Well that was fun.. Giggle
Nina: Oh great what now! No auditorium no novella.
Wicked: Pfft! We can do something better than acting any one up for karaoke!
groans from cast
Wicked: Yeah guess you're all right what kind of a geek would of thought of that n e
way....
Tekk: shows up from nowhere Hey! : (
Wicked: Who are you?
Wicked: snoring with head down
Kazuya: Wake up pokes Wicked
Wicked: says sleepily five more minutes ma I promise I'll get up this time…..
Kazuya: I SAID WAKE UP DAMN IT!!!!! : /
Wicked: HUH! OO; wipes drool off oh right what are we here for yawns again
Kazuya: Were here to hold casting sessions for your dumb "novella"
Wicked: HEY! This novella isn't going to be dumb.
Kazuya: Whatever rolls eyes
Wicked: Isn't that Jin's line?
Kazuya: Let's just get on with it.
Wicked: All righty then who do we have?
Kazuya: Looks at list Well we got Michelle, Lee, Jin, Julia, Ling, Hwoarang, Bryan,
Lei, Christie, Steve, Craig, King, Jun, Nina, Anna, Paul, Forest, and Heihachi. Why did
you put that old ass fossil here!
Wicked: Well, I need someone who's a really evil.
Kazuya: glares at Wicked Aren't I evil enough?
Wicked: Well…
Kazuya: WHAT! ! ! eyes flashing lighting crackling around fist
Wicked: ; Uh! Michelle Chang please step up to the stage…..
Michelle: steps up Can you give me a few seconds to warm up?
Wicked: Sure! You're auditioning for… looks at her own copy of the page the maid of
the house. Right?
Michelle: Yup
Kazuya: mumbling inaudible insults and playing with arubix cube
Wicked: Gimme that! Throws away arubix cube
Kazuya: Flings machete at Wicked
Wicked: Dodges Nice throw you need to work on your aim though…
Kazuya: I'll take that in mind
Wicked: Michelle are you ready?
Michelle: Yeah
Wicked: Which scene r u doing?
Michelle: Oh I'm doing the scene where I get fired from my old job
Wicked: Hold on need to get the script where the hell is it? Start looking around in
circles Damn it where the? SMACK! script falls her head OW! How did that
happen?!?! looks at Kazuya
Kazuya: What? halo appears on his head Whistles
Wicked: Grabs halo breaks it in half How politically incorrect! ! ! Anyways what page is
it?
Michelle: Page 18
Wicked: Okay!
Michelle: does watery eyes you can't fire me! My mother needs a doctor she's sick!
What will I do with out a job! What's going to happen to my mother! Sobs
Wicked: Wow! That was great! Claps don't you think Kaz… sees him playing game
boy advance Where are getting this stuff! Didn't you watch Michelle perform the scene!
grabs Game boy
Kazuya: Give that back you brat! grabs hold of Game boy
Wicked: No pulls back
Kazuya: Yes tug of war is in place
Wicked: You're here for a reason and that's to help me with casting damn it! Pulls
Kazuya: Well it's not fair! pulls really hard and sends Wicked flying across stage w/ game
boy
Wicked: Sees stars and Planets Well, I hope you're happy you broke the game boy!
shakes off planets and stars
Michelle: Did I get the part?
Wicked: Shore did!
Michelle: Woo Hoo! does peace sign
Wicked: Can you wait back stage please
Michelle: I can do that! Goes back stage
Wicked: So who's next?
Kazuya: hisses out Heihachi
Wicked: Heihachi Mishima please step up to the stage!
Heihachi gets on stage
Wicked: Oh my god!
Kazuya: Shudders
Wicked: WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING... THAT! THAT! DIAPER!
Heihachi: Its not a diaper it's a….
Wicked: I don't give a #$%! What it is! If you're having bladder problems go to a
nephrologist! And wear something decent for once!
Heihachi: Well at least I'm not FOUR EYED!
Wicked: eyes twitch What? Did you say….
Heihachi: I said AT LEAST I'M NOT FOUR EYED!!!
Wicked: LISTEN YOU OLD JACKASS! I'M NEAR SIGHTED DAMN IT! AND…
AND…I at least I…I… ARGH! I'M SO ANGRY THAT I CAN'T THINK OF
ANYTHING! gets rosy cheeks
Kazuya: May I?
Wicked: nods
Kazuya mauls Heihachi
Wicked: Thank you
Kazuya: You're very much welcome.
Heihachi: looks really messed up I'll get you! Both of you!
Kazuya: Shad up upper cuts Heihachi sends him flying out of the auditorium
Wicked: Ugh! It was just so horrible starts sobbing he made fun of my glasses takes
off glasses tear runs down face
Kazuya: Gives Wicked Kleenex It's okay
Wicked: Takes Kleenex Thank you. I just…his butt look like two big Christmas Hams!
Kazuya: Well at least I beat the crap outta him
Wicked: Yeah… listen I'm gonna take a little break right now. Can you take over for me
just a little bit? While I go to the ladies room and freshen up.
Kazuya: most innocent tone Of course! Run along now take a break! Don't you worry
about a thing.
Wicked: That's what worries me. Leaves
Kazuya: smiles evilly Heh. heh. Paul Phoenix please step up to the stage!
Wicked: enters ladies room see Jun Hey Jun
Jun: Hi Wicked
Wicked: So what part are you auditioning for?
Jun: Well, I'm auditioning for the wife of the evil husband she fits my personality she
smart, nice, and caring
Wicked: Yeah I know!
Jun: Aren't supposed to be casting?
Wicked: Yeah but I left Kazuya in charge...wait a minute I left KAZUYA IN CHARGE
OH MY GOD!!! runs out of bathroom
Wicked: Dodges a flying Bryan Whoa!
Bryan: delirious Sheeeee's myyyy cherrry pieeee.....
Jin: Watch out tackles Wicked from on coming axe and knife
Wicked: What the Hell is going on?!?!?!?!!!
Jin: A brawls broken out! Duck!
Both of them duck a duck, duck quacking like crazy
Wicked: Where's everyone?
Jin: In the ring on the stage!
Wicked: What?!?!?!
Jun: Comes out of ladies restroom What's going on?
Jin and Wicked: Duck!
Another duck comes flying towards Jun
Jun: Comes over where Wicked and Jin are taking cover Where's everyone else?
Wicked: in the ring! And I'm going to get to the bottom of this! In front of the ring and
sees everyone beating each other mercilessly Hey STOP IT! No one listens STOP!
Mumbles to herself I'll never forgive myself for saying this Takes in deep breath
TEKKEN SUCKS!
Everyone freezes dead silence in the room and starring at Wicked in disbelief
Wicked: I'm sorry everyone that I had to go to such extremes to shut the lot of ya'. Now.
WHO STARTED THIS!!!!!
Michelle, Lee, Julia, Ling, Hwoarang, Bryan, Lei, Christie, Steve, Craig, King, Nina,
Anna, and Forest: Back away and a beat in up Paul and Kazuya standing alone and
pointing at them they started it!
Wicked: I leave you for one second alone and look what you've done! You ruined my
casting session! Do you want to tell me what you did wrong!
Kazuya: Yeah, I got caught.
Wicked: Grrrrrr that's it that's the last straw!!!!!!! Lunges at Kazuya but Lei grabs
Wicked Lemme at em'!!! Lemme! At Em'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lei: Simmer down now cowgirl!
Wicked: Breaks away from Lei Yells out battle cry and runs but Craig, Lei, and King
hold her down Damn it let me go!!!! Starts screaming
Bryan: Whoa! The girls got a screw loose in her head
Steve: Tell me about it
Kazuya: I think she's lost her sanity…. revenge plan in place she's a threat to everyone
she could kill us all
Wicked: The only person I'd kill right now is you! Says really fast You Purple-Suit-
Worshiping-Egatisical-Conceded-Sneaker-Obessed-PIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kazuya: (thinking: I'M GONNA KILL YOU!) Says calmly See she just said She would
kill me right now.
Paul: Sheesh who wouldn't...
Kazuya: Glares at Paul Anyway I think its best if we put her in a strait jacket put one of
those mouth cases and put her on one of those crazy people gurneys.
Jun: Dear, don't you think that's a little too harsh?
Kazuya: Nonsense Jun besides we're doing what's best for her
Wicked: Still struggling I swear if anyone doesn't stop this there's going to be some
serious ass whoopin'!
Kazuya: Anyone in favor of doing what I proposed say I
Lee, Hwoarang, Bryan, Lei, Steve, Craig, King, Kazuya and Forest: I
Kazuya: All oppose say Nay
Michelle, Julia, Ling, Christie, Nina, Anna, Jun, Jin, and Wicked: Nay!
Forest: It's an even vote!
Christie: No it isn't Paul hasn't voted
Nina: So what's it gonna be broom head I or Nay?
Paul: Well….takes in deep breath It's…
Heihachi crashes in auditorium wall with a panzer
Heihachi: wearing an army hat HAH-HA-HA-HAA!!! I SAID I WOULD GET BACK AT YOU AND I'M GOING TO BRING THIS AUDITORIUM DOWN!!! THAT
OUTTA TEACH YOU NOT TO MAKE ME THE HEAD VILLAIN! YOU FOUR EYE!
Hwoarang: dude what is he wearing?
Lee: shudders "The diaper"...
Everyone ewws in disgust
Heihachi: When will you all learn? Anyways back to demolishing the auditorium!
Wicked: breaks away from being held down starts twitching Heh-heh-heh so you
want to ruin my auditorium ruin my novella sessions more than it already is? Do you?!
Well... let me tell you something ever been chased with a huge sickle?
Heihachi: thinks come to think of it no.
Wicked: Well consider this your first time pulls out huge shiny sickle in a psychotic
tone HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAA! START RUNNING !
Heihachi: yippes and runs while Wicked it hot on his trail
Julia: God who lit the fuse on her tamp...
Ling: Don't even finish that line
Nina: And I thought I HAD PMS problems
Jun: Will someone put a stop to this?
Lee: Okay first of all nobody is going to mess with sickle-wielding maniac unless they
don't have a fear of dying...
Everyone except Wicked and Heihachi stares at Jin and Kazuya
Kazuya and Jin: What?
Heihachi runs to the men's room locks the door
Heihachi: HAHAA! You can't get me here!! It's the men's room!
Wicked: hacks at door sticks her head through the door HERE'S JOHNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Keeps chopping door down
Heihachi: screams like Chris Tucker HELP ANY ONE!!! I'M GOING TO MURDER
BY A FOUR EYED MANIAC!
Jin: I'm not going to save that ol' fart he shot me in the head for cripes sakes
Kazuya: And lets us not forget when he threw me in the volcano and all of those painful
childhood memories
Paul: Then you won't have anyone's ass to kick
Kazuya: Yes I do yours!
Jun: Please, if Wicked goes on a rampage then there won't be a novella and I want to be in
that novella please....
Kazuya: All right, come on Jin
Jin: What do you need me for?
Kazuya: Heh-heh bait..
Jin: Bait! I don't like that sound of that! OO;
Wicked: Still hacking away the last of the door
Kazuya: Hey Wicked! Jin says that you're glasses are sooo thick that you can see into the
future!!
Wicked: Stop hacking away at the door slowly turns at Jin lifts sickle and runs at Jin
Jin: screaming while running This isn't fair!
Wicked takes wild swings at Jin
Kazuya: Anyone got any ideas for trapping the animal???
Nina: Here's net that I have
Lei: Nah that isn't going to work she cut through it with the sickle
Jin: Will you all hurry up! OO; starts throwing things to slow Wicked down
Kazuya: WE'RE GOING AS FAST AS WE CAN!! DAMN IT!!
Jin: running from Wicked Listen I know your pissed
Wicked: OO major eye twitch
Jin: I'm sorry!!!
Wicked: stops running with sickle normal voice Really?
Jin: ; yeah…
Wicked: Oh okay chuckle
Jin: Wha? Oo?
Everyone dumbfounded
Anna: Wait a minute just a minute ago you were trying to kill Jin and all it takes to stop
you is an apology?
Wicked: scratches back of her head Yeah weird ain't it? Sorry it's just that I had to
blow off some steam. Sighs I think we should get back to casting don't you all think so?
Everyone but Heihachi and Wicked: Yeah!
Wicked: And Ah yes diaper man! Get out of my auditorium before I go BUCK WILD ON
YOUR ASS AGAIN!
Heihachi: runs to his panzer and leaves I'm rich and powerful I can make my own
novella
Wicked: Oh Yeah?! What are you going to have next a fan club? That I'll be the day!
Wicked: Well, since the wall's been bulldozed and the fact that most of you beat the crap
outta each other I think it's a good idea that you all get some rest for tomorrow its that
cool with all of you?
Everyone but Kazuya: Woo-Hoo!
Wicked: smiles okay then see ya everyone bright and early tomorrow. Looks at
Kazuya what's wrong with you?
Kazuya: You
Wicked: Growls
next day in auditorium
Craig: It's soo #$%ing cold here!
King: Well duh stupid the walls been bulldozed!
Kazuya: Where in the hell is Jun and Wicked.
Everyone except Kazuya: I dunno shrug
Wicked in Jun come in
Wicked: Hello everybody!
Everybody except Jun: Hi Dr. Wicked!
Wicked: Weird reflex....
Jun: Since it was cold outside we both thought we should bring some cookies and hot
chocolate
Wicked: Oh! And Hwoarang I brought in some "special" brownies for you winks
Hwoarang: Thanx dudette winks back
Jin: What was that all about?
Wicked: Nothing :D here have some hot chocolate, by the way the people who are
supposed to fixed the wall where are they?
Jin: I dunno trying to steal a brownie
Paul: Hey! Here they are!
Wicked: Hey there! So how long do you think the work will take?
Person 1: Hrm I'm a little rusty at walls but I'm a pro at fixing air conditioners.
Person 2: Yup I sure am lets see now I think it'll take us around three days. Green sword
sticks out Bryan sees it
Bryan: Wicked! Starts poking her repeatedly Look! Look!
Wicked: STOP POKING ME!!! grabs a cookie and shoves it into Bryan's mouth, Bryan
starts munching on it
Bryan: Mmm, is this a Grandma style cookie? munches
Person 1 and Person 2: anime sweat drop
Wicked: Okay, so n e way how much do you think this will cost?
Person 1: We'll take an estimate
Wicked: Take your time! starts hearing hooting
Nina: The last cookie is mine bitch! SLAP!
Anna: No its mine! SMACK
Wicked: Grabs cookie Stop it! Didn't you get your fill of fighting yesterday?!?!
Nina and Anna: ……………no................................: /
Wicked: And for the people who cheered them on shame on you! looks at Nina and
Anna And double shame on you too. I'm giving to someone who doesn't even care about
it Gives it to Kazuya
Kazuya: Oooh cookie! spots Paul eyeing it Grabs machete Don't even think
about!
Paul: whimpers
Jun: You want some hot chocolate with that dear?
Kazuya: Yes please O: )
Jun: Here you go hands him a cup of hot chocolate and gives him a kiss
Everyone except Lei, Jin, and Wicked: Awwwwwwwww! :)
Lei, Jin, and Wicked: Oui! rolls eyes dodges a chair compliments from Kazuya
Wicked: Okay everyone! I was thinking last night and I've already cast some people I'll
start with the obvious Michelle- head maid of the house
Steve- bodyguard for leading lady
Jun- Wife of the head villain
Forrest- Cook of the house
Nina- 1st business partner of the head villain
Lee- Uncle of the leading lady and 2nd business partner
Anna- 2nd business partners bitch
Everyone giggles except for Anna
Anna: Frowns not funny Wicked
Wicked continues to read down the list
King- priest
Paul- Mechanic
Craig- Advisor for the head villain
Christie- Cousin of the leading lady
Wicked: Okay I haven't decide on who's going to be the head villain the leading man or
the leading lady…….
Jin, Julia, Ling, Hwoarang, Bryan, Lei, and Kazuya: WHAT?!?!?!?!
Wicked: Kazuya, why did you go what?
Kazuya: Uh…because you don't hurry your slow ass up! That's why!
Wicked: Uh-huh yeah sure, any way who was auditioning for leading man
Jin and Hwoarang: I was
Wicked: slaps herself on the forehead That's what I was afraid of, fine, I'll make this
quick I'm thinking of a # between 1 and 700 can you guess what it is?
Hwoarang: 420?
Jin: 666 covers mouth where did that come from?!
Kazuya: That's my boy! :D
Jun: smack Kazuya upside of the head Don't encourage that!
Wicked: My number was 612 congrats Jin! You're the leading man!
everyone claps except for Hwoarang
Jin: :) thanks Wicked
Wicked: smiles Don't worry Hwoarang I'll have a part!
Hwoarang: Can you make it a good one?
Wicked: Of course! I'll cook up one umm I know snaps fingers how's about the nah
that wouldn't work....
Hwoarang: What?
Wicked: Well… I was going to make the leading lady's cousin boyfriend but I know
Christie would be royally pissed
Christie: Damn straight!
Wicked: So I'll make you the leading lady's brother how does that sound!
Hwoarang: Hella cool!
Wicked: And as an added bonus in the script the brother punches the leading man
Hwoarang: Sweet!
Jun: Wicked I don't want Jin getting hurt
Wicked: Jun Chill! It's going to be fake!
Hwoarang: : /
Wicked: Okay now time for leading lady part and let's see Julia and Ling you're both
auditioning for this part.
Ling and Julia: ;
Wicked: Is it the fact that there a lot of make out scenes the leading man???
Ling and Julia: sweat drop :)
Wicked: Well, I can't choose so Jin you choose
Jin: What me choose!?!?!? I can't!
Wicked: Why ain't nothing wrong with that.
Jin: Yes there is!
Wicked: Yeah you're right you're too soft Kazuya you do it
Kazuya: Me! Lee you do it! And if you don't choose I'll bitch slap you back to Tekken 1!
Lee: Well I um.........uh...
Michelle: sharpens Axe
Lee: squeal faints
Kazuya: This is stupid! Wicked why won't you…
Wicked: Zzzzz
Nina: Look she left a note, its for Kazuya, and one for me and Anna
Kazuya: starts to read Wicked's note I have a headache right now do not wake me up
or you shall feel the wrath of my sickle since Jun is here with you I trust you shall pick the
leading lady for the sake of Lee. I know if he picked Ling. Michelle would be beating his
ass right now. Please be a good leader and behave for my sake…- Wicked. Okay I can do
that.
Nina and Anna: Starts to read note from Wicked To Nina: If Paul tries anything to start
a fight w/ Kazuya please be so kind to kick him where the sun doesn't shine. To Anna:
Don't start a fight with Nina and reframe from hitting on anyone.
Anna: Damn it!
Nina: Hell yes! looks at Paul and grins evilly
Paul: crosses his legs wince Aiiii : (
Kazuya: sighs Okay then I'll just do what Wicked did w/ Jin and Hwoar…Bob I'm
thinking of a number between 1 and 200 guess what it is?
Ling: Uh…150?
Julia: Hrm…….148?
Kazuya: its was 127 well Julia I guess you won
Julia: Jumps up and down I got the part!!!!!!! WOO-HOO!
Wicked: says groggily Ey what the deal I was having a really good nap…..yawns
done?
Kazuya: Julia's the leading lady
Wicked: Oh well that's nice... Ling your Hwoarang's girlfriend.
Ling: That's not fair! I always get pair with that junkie!
Hwoarang: I can hear you! You know! : O!
Wicked: Well deal with it! Julia got the part fair and square! Okay now time to pick the
head villain! looks at list Lei and Bryan step up please…
Lei and Bryan step up
Wicked: Aight, Bryan why do you wanna be head villain?
Bryan: Cuz it would be nice for once to be the main bad ass
Wicked: nods good, good, and by the way I have a pair of boots that match the snake
skin pants
Bryan: Really! Where you get em?
Wicked: Well there a funny story that goes with it! It was in Tijuana when…
Lei: coughs!
Wicked: Oh right, that, okay Lei why do you want to be head villain....rolls eyes
Lei: Blushes well what Bryan said....nervous look
Wicked: Ey! Wait a sec! It's not that! Isn't it?! You're blushing and talking like an idiot!?
Lei: eyes shift yeah it is!!!
Wicked: snatches Lei's script Flips through script Aha! You had the passionate kissing
scene with the wife highlighted which is Jun!
Kazuya: SON OF A BITCH! I'M GONNA KILL YOU! starts to beat the sass out of
Lei Nobody is going to be head villain or smooch my woman except for me damn it!
Wicked: AHA! points at Kazuya SO YOU FINALLY CONFESS! YOU DO WANT
TO BE IN THE NOVELLA!
Kazuya: I didn't say that! shifty eyes and drops a beaten up Lei down Did I?
Everyone except Kazuya: Um-hmm! Yup!
Kazuya: Okay! I do want to be in it!
Wicked: Yay! hugs Kazuya
Kazuya: Ugh! pushes Wicked one step at a time......
Wicked: Right.... sorry looks at Lei ah poor dude you shouldn't have taken it soo hard
on him look at 'em the only way I can tell it's him is by the clothes.
Kazuya: Well no one gets near my Jun except for me grabs Jun
Jun: giggle :)
Bryan: Did I get the part?
Wicked: I haven't decided
Person 2: When do we take the scripts?
Person 1: Not until the head villain is chosen
Wicked: Well, the villain has to be tough and there only one way to solve this
Lei: Gets up How?
Wicked: voice of tone changes Wit a Mississippi Free fo' all!
Everyone except Wicked: Huh?!
Wicked: still with a southern accent its easy when yuz git knocked down yuz gotz to stay
down dat's all.
Kazuya: This ought to be easy...
Paul: I haven't been to a free fo all in a long time! Forget being Mechanic I wanna be the
head villain
Wicked: Fine Paul if it floats ya boat den oh-kay! Now let's let dees fine men step up to da
ring! And place ya bets cus dis free fo' all is getting started! Now da ring rulez are no
martial arts no power ups just a good ol' fistfight! Oh fo' got somethin' rips off
Kazuya's Bryan's Lei's and Paul's shirts off
Paul: How'd she do that? Oo;
All women fighters except for Wicked and Jun: start whistling at Kazuya Ooh baby!
Shake it K-Lo! Take the pants off!! hooting AWOO WOO WOO!!!!!
Kazuya: Blushes in anger That's sexual harassment!
Wicked: Now, now Ladies ya can thank him by placin ya bets
Jun and Nina: scream WE BET 100 ON KAZUYA!!!!!!!
Anna: I BET 90 ON BRYAN !
Ling, Julia, and Christie: 80 ON LEI!
Wicked: Thank u ladies thank you! takes money
Paul: Nobody bets on me....sniff
Forest: sighs grumbles Says flatly 10 on Paul...
Paul: Yeah!
Hwoarang: munching on a brownie Hey Jin want one???
Jin: Well I don't see the harm in having a brownie takes brownie O: )
Ling: snatches brownie away
Jin: Hey! Give that back
Ling: Okay coughs on brownie here you go
Jin: Never mind Hwoarang got n e more
Wicked: Ladies and Gents get ready fo da Free fo all!!!!!!!!!
ding ding
Wicked: Let's get to de smakin!
all four guys circle each other
Lee: starts yellin' like the bags chips seller on 42nd street Get yo' soda! canday! Bee-
ars! I gotta it all here fo cheap!
Julia: Yo Dr. Pepper over here!
Lee throws a D.P. at Julia
Julia catches soda
King and Craig: 2 Cervesas over here!
Lee throws 2 cans of beer
King and Craig: chug down beer and let out a rip roaring belches
Wicked: Oo uh-huh Kazuya smacks Lei down Paul smacks Kazuya, Kazuya smacks
back
And de free fo all has officially started! Lei get outs of ring and passes out Wicked
looks over Lei
Lei: ugh...
Wicked: Forest drag dis po' fella to a chair
Forest: does what he was told
Wicked: Hey Jin Hwoarang Ling gonna make ne bets? OH MY JESUS!
Jin, Hwoarang, and Ling: singing #En el Mar la vida es mas sabrosa! En el mar todo
puedes garra! En el mar la luz y las estrellas! En el mar todo es felicidad!#
Wicked: What the #$%? You ass! Those were for you! grabs Hwoarang and throws
him in to the free fo all ring
Bob gets trampled over
Jin and Ling: Bcuz I got high bcuz I got high la da dat da! take another bite of their
brownies
Wicked: snatches brownies away those were for Bob!
Paul and Kazuya gain up on Bryan
Person 1: Now? Everyone seems to be into the fight
Person 2: No wait
Person 1: Who do you places your bets on?
Person 2: Hmmm I'm bettin on Kazuya you?
Person 1: Ditto
both nod
Bryan: gets knock down
Wicked: Can n e one drag him outta the ring?
Steve: says desperately I will! trying to avoid Anna
Anna: Hey where you going?
Nina: Hey slut leave him alone!
Anna: this isn't any of your business bitch!
Nina: Oh yeah! You're like a bus 50 cents and your ready to ride! : )
Julia, King, Craig, Christie, Jin, Ling, Forest: Ooh
Anna: Well, you're like Chinese food sweet, sour, and cheap! :D
Julia King Craig Christie Jin Ling Forest: Oh!!!
Nina: Rrrrrrr! You're like a bubble-gum machine... five cents a blow.
Anna: slaps Nina
Nina: You bitch!
cat fight in progress
Jun: Wicked! points at Nina and Anna
Wicked: shrugs And your point is???
Kazuya: sends Paul flying out of the ring
Paul: lands on Nina and Anna and smiles toothlessly Hey this isn't so bad.... snuggles
against Nina's chest and grabs Anna's butt
Anna and Nina: Get off! shove Paul off
Paul: You know you like it!
Nina and Anna: nod agreeing both jump Paul
Wicked: gets on the stage De winnah of da Mississippi Free fo all! Raises Kazuya
hand hey your knuckles are bleeding...
Kazuya: Really? Well what do you know...
Jun: My poor baby! You want some iodine on that?
Jin and Wicked: Oui Vey! Dodge a script
Person 2: Now! Smoke screen
Person 1: takes scripts and heads out the torn wall
Person 2: Leaves ransom note
smoke clears
Craig: The scripts are gone!
King: No sht Einstein
Wicked: Hey a ransom note reads If you want to see your precious scripts again name
Heihachi the head villain. That trifflin' diaper wearing depends freak hell no! Hey there's
more reads you will be called in 30 minutes if you don't not respond by then the scripts will be burnt. I ain't gonna give up! This calls for detective work! is about to say Lei but
changes mind..Bryan solve this!
Bryan: I already know who took the scripts
Everyone expect Bryan and Lei: What?
Bryan: Yup, I figured it out when I saw a green sword sticking out of the second person's
suits then the first person said that that she was a pro at fixing air conditioners so it was..
Wicked: Cut to the chase damn it!
Bryan: It was Yoshimitsu and Kunimitsu
Wicked: Now that's what I call detective work!
Lei: Hey I'm awake you know...
Wicked: So I don't car...Aaahhh! falls into a trap door, trap door closes
Wicked: tied to a chair Huh what?
Heihachi: Mwahahahahaaaaa! Make me head villain or your precious scripts are shredded!
Wicked: It doesn't matter if you burn the scripts the story is still in my head so blows
razz
Heihachi: Rrrr you little brat I'll teach you! Dr. Abel bring in "The tapes!"
Kunimitsu: Okay that's just plain cruel!!!
Baek: Yeah, don't you think you're being too harsh?
Wicked: Where did you all come from?
Heihachi: I wasn't the only one who was pissed not to be in the novella so I brought a few
people to help.
Wicked: How many?
Heihachi: Well most of the characters you didn't put in the novella so yeah pretty much
you're outnumbered if you try to escape...
Wicked: Yeah guess so..
Heihachi: Scratches head now where was I?
Wicked: You were talking about something about "the tapes"
Heihachi: Oh yeah, thanks
Wicked: Yeah you're welcome okay go..
Dr. Abel: Here are the tapes
Heihachi: Mwhahah perfect now see if you can survive through this kind of torture! Let's
see what we have laughs evilly On tour with 'Nsync, an Olson Twins marathon, and to top it off an HBO's Live Brittany Spears in Concert!
Wicked: Aaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!
Heihachi: By you're screaming I'm guessing you'd want to watch the 'Nsync tape, okay
is about to put it in the VCR
Wicked: OO;;;;;; Wait!
Hehachi: What? Are you now going to name me head villain?
Wicked: Hell no! I just wanted to say something before I get brainwashed
Heihachi: Yeah what???
Wicked: Depends when you got to go you got to go!
Heihachi: tapes Wicked eyes open that outta teach you! Mwahahaha enjoy the show slams the door
Wicked: OO;;;;
Meanwhile in the auditorium....
Jun: She's gone
Hwoarang: Yeah dude she like whoa! disappeared...
Julia: The trap door is stuck I can't get it open
Kazuya: I know who did this
Lei: Who?
Kazuya: Well who else you drunken idiot! That old fart, come on we got to go rescue our writer back! Who's with me!
Everyone: I am!
Kazuya: Now let's go kick some ass!!!
Nsync tape about to finish: baby bye bye bye bye Bye! screams of girls tapes ends
Wicked: Eyes twitching (I don't know how much I can take….)
Heihachi: Well the tape's done playing now then
Wicked: NEVER YOU PRUNE FANATIC!!!!!
Heihachi: Enjoy seeing Britney Spears! takes out tape and pops in the Britney Spears
tape heh heh enjoy.. slams the door again
Marshall: Number 31
Unknown and Wang: BINGO!
Heihachi: Hey! You guys said you would wait for me!
Bruce: Dude! It's just a game!
Kazuya and the rest of the cast busts in
Kazuya: Give us back our writer damn it!
Heihachi: What! I don't know what you mean?
Ganryu: Hi Michelle!
Michelle: Suddenly I have an itch for hunting and killing something that's wears a
diaper.....
Julia: Heihachi?
Michelle: Something chunky..
Julia: ?
Michelle: Never mind ;
Kazuya: starts to look around Where is she?! Come damn you out with it!
Jin: Correction, you are the damned...
Kazuya: Thinks Yeah, but at least I don't eat special brownies!
Jun: Jin! pinches Jin those were for B..
Hwoarang: Say that and I swear ..
Kazuya: Swear what BOB?! eye glows red
Screams from the other room
Kazuya: That's her!
Heihachi: gets in front of door I don't know what you mean there's nothing in here!
shifty eyes
hysterical screaming
Kazuya: Get the #$% out of the way! Pushes the old uh I mean Heihachi away busts through the door
Britney Spears tape ends…
Wicked: ………..
Kazuya: takes the tape out of the VCR ewww shudders drops tape
Jun: Wicked! unties her
Bryan: shakes her speak to us!
Wicked: ……….. eyes and lips twitching
Julia: Uh-oh
Craig: What?
Anna: She been brainwashed most likely…
Nina: She'll turn into that points at Ling
Ling: reading Teenybopper mag. smacking gum playing with pigtails Hee hee hee what?
Jin: An airhead?
Forrest: Precisely.
Lei: How much time do we have?
Michelle: Not much but…there might be a flipside to this…
Lee: What do you mean?
Paul: You don't mean…gasps
Heihachi: enters the room What the hell are you all talking about?!?!?!!!
Michelle: You idiot! Do you have any idea what you caused! pulls out her axe
Christie: Uh guys! Look!
Wicked: starts to giggle
Julia: It's started! Everyone get out!
Every one except Julia and Wicked: Why?
Wicked: AHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! goes 4rm Wicked to her old self
POOF has kitty ears head band long black nails pulls out sickle
Mwhahahahahahaahaha!!!!!! OO
Kazuya: Everyone get the hell out of here!!!! She's back to Psycho!!!
Wicked: Mwhahahaaaaaa!!!! I want Meow mix I want chicken I want liver meow mix
meow mix please deliver!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAAA!!! start trashing everything
Heihachi: This will stop her! throws pixy stix
Jin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Kazuya: You Eeediot!!!
everyone runs out of the auditorium
Wicked: MWHAHAHAHHAHAH eats pixy stix hyper KITTYGOBOOMBOOM
hits load bearing bar!!.................... Uh-oh. : / auditorium collapse
fog of dust
clears
Wicked: Pops out of rubble Well that was fun.. Giggle
Nina: Oh great what now! No auditorium no novella.
Wicked: Pfft! We can do something better than acting any one up for karaoke!
groans from cast
Wicked: Yeah guess you're all right what kind of a geek would of thought of that n e
way....
Tekk: shows up from nowhere Hey! : (
Wicked: Who are you?