The Super Secret Love of Raj and Howard

Raj and Howard silently opened the door to Sheldon and Leonard's apartment. They crept across the cluttered expanse of the the living room towards their target, the prized and coveted Cylon Toaster. "Damn it Howard, where is it?" Raj whispered.

"I don't know! He usually has it out in the open so it doesn't burn the apartment down."

"Well, I don't see it anywhere on the counter!"

"He probably keeps it close by, we should check his room," Howard hissed and led the way to Sheldon's room. The door creaked as they pushed it ever so slightly, and they froze. Sheldon murmured in his sleep about a Nobel Prize and turned over revealing the toaster held limply in his arms.

"What kind of a weirdo sleeps with a toaster?" Howard asked, stepping lightly into the room.

"Grab it and let's get out of here, I want breakfast."

Howard rolled his eyes and tip-toed over to stand next to Sheldon's bed. The clock read three a.m. the red numbers giving an eery glow to the toaster; Howard produced a bag of sand weighing it in proportion to what he though the toaster might weigh. He slowly slid the toaster out of Sheldon's loose grip, and replaced it with the bag of sand before Sheldon could realize his precious Cylon Toaster was missing.

They slipped out of the apartment and on to the street, "We should hurry, Sheldon will notice the sand in his bed soon," Howard said setting a quick pace down the deserted streets. As they passed creepy dark alleys and suspicious people loitering around, Raj slipped his hand in Howard's. The feel of Raj's smooth cool hand in his sparked a fire in Howard's gut – No! This was no time to get amorus.

~Back at Raj's apartment~

Raj proudly set the Cylon Toaster on the coffee table in front of the TV. "That was fun!" he announced. "Now what do we do with it?"

"We could make toast," Howard offered.

"But - where is the thrill in that?"

"Well," Howard said thoughtfully, "we could write a ransom note."

"Brilliant!" Raj grabbed a pen and a sheet of paper from his desk and sat down on the couch with it. He held the pen to the paper, but paused. "When writing the ransom note," he said, "should we capitalize the toaster in Cylon Toaster?"

"Well, it is a title," Howard said.

A/N: This was written as a collaboration between myself and a friend we traded off every other line. Hope you enjoy! :D

(Maybe another chapter?)