Hey all, it's been a while since I worked on a Supernatural story. I've had this idea for a couple of years now but never got round to writing it. I heard this song and couldn't help but think it fitted Dean perfectly. I was just going to put the lyrics and leave it at that but decided to write the story as though Dean was listening to the song and thought it fit him. Set during season 5
Song- Lynyrd Skynyrd 'Still Unbroken'
As always, I own nothing! Seriously, I own nothing at all. Nada.
...
There are times when I just sit back and listen to the radio rather than my tapes. It doesn't happen very often, but when I do, I find it very relaxing. I only pulled into this motel ten minutes ago, but as soon as I entered the room, the radio went on. My bag and jacket are somewhere in the room, I can't even remember where I threw them. It's strange being here without Sammy; seeing the vacant bed that would usually have his bags neatly placed on it makes me feel somewhat lonely. Okay, so he is annoying and gassy, but I just can't imagine not ever hunting alongside him again. A song starts playing and it's one I recognize from a few days ago when the station played it. As I lay back and listen to the lyrics, I can't help but wander if maybe Chuck wrote this song and got Lynyrd Skynyrd to sing it. It just seemed to fit my life perfectly.
Broken bones, broken hearts,
Stripped down and torn apart, a little bit of rust, I'm still running.
Counting miles, counting tears. Twisting roads, shifting gears
Year after year, its all or nothing
Ever since I turned ten, my life has revolved around three things; hunting, the Impala and most importantly to me, my family. Days, weeks, months and now years have been spent sitting in the same car driving around all types of road. As a kid, I used to map out every place we went to for a hunt but within six months there were so many places, I just couldn't keep up. The Impala definitely has wear and tear; she's rusty in some places, dirt ridden in others, but still, like me, she keeps going through hell or high water. I feel like me and the Impala have a connection and sure, Sammy often teases me about her, but I feel we're kindred spirits. I've suffered broken bones and my heart has been broken more than once and the Impala was almost destroyed just a few years back, but here we are, still in one piece and fighting on.
I'm not home, I'm not lost
Still holding to what I've got
Ain't much left
No, there's so much that's been stolen
I've lost everything I've had
But I'm not dead, at least not yet
Still alone
Still alive
Still Unbroken
It's true; I have virtually nothing to my name. I have no home to speak of, the closest thing to a home in the past decade is probably Bobby's but even then, I'm there so little that even that's not quite a home to me. Over the years I have literally lost everything. Mom dies when I was five, Dad died three years ago and I've even watched Sammy die on me. Fortunately I got him back and yeah, okay I gave up my soul and went to Hell for four months, but I would do it all again if I had to. Bobby says that us Winchesters seem to have a heroes complex or something, but it runs deeper than that. It's the automatic response to protect those we love, which often involves sacrificing ourselves. That's why, when I'm with Sammy I'm so protective. I know he's a big guy that can protect himself, but he's the only family I have left and I'll be damned if I lose him again. Despite all the hardships though, I like to think I've held on to the majority of my sanity and though right at this minute I'm on my own, I'm still alive and I've yet to be broken. Even in Hell, I may have eventually snapped and played into Alistair's hands but I never completely broke and surrendered myself; there was still that part of me that was determined to get out of there. I will never break.
Never captured, never tamed
Wild horses on the plains
You could call me lost, I call it freedom
I feel the spirit in my soul, somethin nobody can control
I'll never give it up while I'm still breathin
Okay, so I may have been caught countless times, but not one of the sons-of-bitches has been able to keep me down for long. And not one of them has ever tamed me like some puppy, so I can be proud of that. I like to think I'm free; the white stag of hunters so to speak. I've had numerous people suggest to me about settling down and starting a family but I find myself wandering how I could even think about doing that while so much evil is out there. I've been called lost and I've been told that I just seem to be wandering aimlessly about, but man, if those people knew even a tenth of the things I face every day, they would soon take it back. I'm not lost; I know exactly where I'm going and how to get there. Hunting is my life; it's what I do and who I am. Nothing and nobody will ever completely pull me away from hunting, I can't control the impulses I have to destroy the evil out there, and I'll never even try to control them. As long as I live, I will never stop hunting. As long as I have Sammy and my friends alongside me, I know I can conquer anything. You hear that Lucifer? You won't win; we will. When the time comes, all those that have ever doubted me or my family will see the true force of the Winchesters.
I will always remain unbroken.
Like the wind, like the rain, it's all running through my veins
Like a river pouring down into the ocean
I'm out here on the streets but I'm standing on my feet
Still alive,
Still alone
Still Unbroken