Because I Love You.
-Clare's POV
-It's like the beginning of school.
-Clare got pregnant during sophmore year.
-Gave birth during summer.
-Eclare vs Flare. Who do you want to win?
ATTENTION: If you like Speak Now, I might discontinue. I have writer's block for it.
PS: Today's my birthday but this is my present to you :D.
Summary: Clare and Fitz had a son during junior year. Later, they get into a big fight and break up. Clare gets a new boyfriend and Fitz changes. He is determined to win her back. Will he succeed? Or will Clare stay with Eli?
Chapter 1: Past, Present, Future.
I carefully picked up Nick from his blue crib, bouncing him to try to get him to stop crying. I glanced at the clock and it read 2:42 AM. Ugh. About three more hours of sleep until I had to get up and get ready for school.
"Shhh. Mommy's gonna get your bottle." I cooed, trying to soothe Nick and gently rubbed his back up and down, hoping he'd stop crying.
I walked out of my room and down the stairs to the kitchen to feed Nick. I quietly took a bottle of formula from the refrigerator and put it in the microwave to heat up. I stuck a pacifier in Nick's mouth and he stopped crying. I waited patiently for his bottle to heat up.
The microwave beeped, indicating the bottle was done and I took it out. I removed the pacifier from my baby's mouth and replaced it with the bottle. I walked over to the living room, sat on the sofa and fed Nick. After he was finished, I burped him and he quickly fell back asleep. I walked back upstairs, into my room and placed Nick back in his crib that was next to be bed.
I climbed back into my bed and instantly fell asleep, exhausted from motherhood. It was times like these when I really needed Fitz's help. But he wasn't here because I had ended our relationship a month ago.
A few hours later I was awoken from my phone's vibrating. I quickly turned off my alarm and tiptoed to the bathroom, trying not to awake my sleeping baby. I looked at myself in the mirror. I had these beautiful blue eyes that Fitz thought were the most beautifulest eyes he had ever seen. My hair was a little past my shoulder and was full of ringlets that Fitz loved.
I missed him so badly. I threw away two and a half years all because of one stupid little fight that I don't even remember what we were arguing about. Though I would never admit it to his face about how bad I missed him.
I quickly did my morning ritual and got dressed. A floral babydoll that hugged my breasts and hid my after pregnancy belly. I also put on a pair of skinny jeans and a pair of white flats to top it off.
I lifted Nick from his crib and kissed his cheek. He gurgled and we made our way downstairs. I saw my mom cooking breakfast at the stove. I placed Nick on his high chair and went over to her so I could greet her.
"Morning Mom." I said, giving her a kiss on the cheek.
"Morning honey." She replied and went back to cooking the turkey bacon. I went to the refrigerator to take out some food for Nick.
I walked over to the cabinet and took put Nick's bowl. I poured some banana mush into his small bowl and sat back down.
I fed him each as if the spoon was an airplane and his mouth was the airport. I smiled at him and saw the mix of me and Fitz. After I finished feeding Nick, I ate my own breakfast which was very satisfying.
My mom dropped me off and the hardest part was saying goodbye to my baby. I kissed him numerous times before departing with him. I watched as my mother drove away.
I walked into school and headed to my locker to retrieve my books. I was putting my history book in my bag until I saw Alli standing next to me.
"Hey Alli." I greeted her and gave her hug.
"Clare. I am in love with your outfit. I have taught you so well." She smiled and hugged me back.
I laughed and she started to tell me about this new guy. She told me that he drove a hearse, wore a lot of black, and was already building a reputation here at Degrassi.
"Is he attractive?" I knew I was in love with Fitz, but I couldn't help but ask.
"I haven't seen him yet, but Jenna told me what he looks like. She said he has black hair and a smirk that was plastered on his face." Alli explained. He sounded pretty hot.
We walked to homeroom and on the way there, I saw Fitz. He was hanging with out Owen and Bianca. I stared at him for a second and then breezed past him.
I could tell he was staring back at me. I could feel his eyes fixed on my back. I walked into homeroom and took my seat. Homeroom ended quickly and classes started but by English, I was exhausted. I took my seat next to Adam and laid my head down on the desk.
"Tired?" Adam asked jokingly. I wasn't in the mood.
"I feel dead." I really wanted to go home.
"I heard the new kid is in this class." Adam gossiped. This kid hears everything.
"I don't care." I mumbled and finally lifted my head.
"Alright class, this is our new student, Elijah Goldsworthy." Ms. Dawes introduced the new kid and he was hot. Like really hot.
"It's Eli." He corrected her and took the empty seat in front of me. How was I gonna concentrate with him seated directly in front of me? Oh dear god.
"Alright Eli, from now until the end of the year, the young lady behind you is your new English partner." With those words, I mentally groaned.
"Eli." He turned to face me and introduced himself. He was staring at my eyes.
"Clare." I introduced myself. I couldn't help but stare at his beautiful green eyes.
After class, I was greeted by Fitz waiting for me. I was surprised. I pretty sure he hates me after we breakup.
"Hey. How's Nick?" Fitz asked me. He might hate me but I was the mother of his child. He loved his son.
"He's good." I replied and we walked to my locker.
"So. When can I see him?" Nick was lucky to have loving dad. When I got pregnant, I thought Fitz would leave. He proved me wrong and stayed from the first day til now.
"How about today at like four?" I asked, lucky that my baby would have a dad in his life.
"See you then." Fitz said and with that, he walked away.
I made my way to lunch and took a seat next to Alli at our table. I saw Jenna and KC sharing lunch and making out. Adam reading another comic book. Alli was doing nothing and her face light up when I sat down.
"I heard new kid's your English partner." She exclaimed and I shushed her.
"So what?" I asked brushing it off like it was nothing.
"Is he hot?" Alli questioned me some more.
"Yes." I admitted. Alli smirked.
"By the way, I saw Fitz at your locker. Explain, Clare." Alli demanded.
"He wanted to see Nick." I explained and started to miss my baby boy.
"How is he? When do I get to visit?" She asked, really wanted to see him, her godson.
"Tomorrow?" I asked, already knowing the answer.
"Okay." She smiled and went back to eating lunch.
I looked around and saw Fitz staring at me and Eli sitting alone. I got up and walked over to Eli. I took and seat in front of him. Eli looked up from his comic book. It was similar to the one Adam was reading.
"Hi. I saw you sitting alone and wondering if you want to sit with me and my friends. My friend, Adam, is also reading a comic similar to yours." I said, hoping he would take my offer.
"I guess if you want." He smirked. That smirk was getting to me.
"Your choice." Please say yes. Please say yes.
"Alright, but just for you." Eli said and quickly gathered up his things. I led him to our table. He saw Adam's comic and immediately sat next to him. Alli gave me a look. I smiled at her innocently. I did nothing.
After school, I quickly finished my homework before Fitz arrived. When I heard the doorbell ring, I went to open it. I saw Fitz standing there with a bag.
"What's in the bag?" I asked curiously and let him in.
"Some cookies my mom baked and something for Nick." Fitz replied and gave me the bag. His mom had made me some chocolate chip cookies and a quilt with Nick's full name on it.
Nicholas Jacob Fitzgerald.
"Tell your mom I said thanks." I told Fitz and led him to my room where Nick was playing with his toys on his crib. Fitz smiled and went to pick up Nick.
"So how are you?" I asked, breaking the silence.
"I've been good. You?" He asked looking me straight in the eye.
"Tired. Two months old are hard to take care of." I admitted. I stared at the container of cookies I had in my hands. I couldn't look at him. It was too hard.
"My mom wants to know if Nick could stay with us for a few days. She said we need to make a schedule since we aren't together anymore." Fitz bounced Nick gently on his knee.
"We probably should." I said, knowing that's it the right thing to do.
"So how about you get him weekdays and I have him weekends?" Fitz propose a plan that seemed reasonable.
"That works. So tomorrow after school I drop him off at your house and Sunday night, you'll drop him at my house? Then we repeat the cycle?" I asked. Being a responsible parent means I have to share with Fitz.
"That works." Fitz went back to the crib and placed Nick in it. Nick had fallen asleep in his arms. It was such a cute scene.
"Um, he fell asleep. Do you want me to go?" Fitz asked me, unsure what to do now that Nick was sleeping.
"You can stay if you want. I could put in a movie." I said, and we went into the living room. He took a seat on the couch.
"Alright." He said and relaxed on the couch. I put in Twilight and waited for his reaction. Nothing.
"I thought you hated Twilight." I said and took a seat on the soft loveseat.
"I do." He was watching the screen as I fumbled with the remote.
"Then why aren't you saying anything?" I asked, confused by his behavior.
"Because you like it and I'll sit through it for you." He replied simply. It took all my might not to jump on him and kiss him.
"You've changed a lot since we've started going out." I noted. He was so different in a good way though.
"What do you mean?" He asked. I knew he knew what I meant.
"When we first started going out. You smoked, did drugs,and drank. You even said you had no future." I remember when he said that to me when I used to tutor him so he wouldn't fail.
"Yeah but I heard you say to Alli that you didn't want a boyfriend like me so I changed for you. I really liked you, Clare." He admitted. I was shocked. I never expected him to say things like that.
"You heard that?" I asked. I remembered that conversation I had with Alli about him when we first started dating.
"Yeah. I felt like I wasn't good enough for you." That killed me inside. He would always be good for me.
"Fitz, if you were still the old you, I still would've date you. I just wouldn't have liked your bad habits." I really loved him. I really wanted to be his girlfriend again.
"So you like old me better?" He asked and smirked. It didn't match Eli's but it was cute.
"No. Honestly, I like the new you better." I admitted.
"Then why aren't we together, Clare? I love you!" Fitz asked trying not to wake up Nick.
"I don't know." I whispered. I wanted to be together but I just couldn't and I didn't know why.
"I have to go to work." He ran up the stairs and I followed him. I saw him kiss Nick goodbye and rushed past me. I really sucked. My one chance to get him back and I messed it up.
The next morning I woke up with dried tears on my cheeks. I hated myself right now.
I walked over to Nick's crib and found it empty. I started to panic. Where was my baby boy?
I ran downstairs to find my mom feeding Nick. I instantly calmed down.
"Oh hey honey. Nick was hungry and you were upset, so I decided to feed him." She smiled. I loved my mom so much. She has been so supportive of my pregnancy and she's so happy that she has a grandson.
"Thanks Mom." I kissed her cheek and went upstairs to get ready. I put on my favorite tee which Fitz and I got together while I was still pregnant. It was sky blue and said "Nick's Mommy" in pink letters. He had a matching tee in blue that said "Nick's Daddy" in green letters. I also put on a pair of bermuda shorts that Alli got me and some blue Converse.
I ate breakfast and played with Nick for a few more minutes. Then my mom dropped me off and I gave Nick a million kisses before I left the car and walked into school.
I walked to my locker and notices that the empty locker next to me now had a lock on it. I finished packing up my books when I saw Eli walking towards the locker next to mine.
"You're the one who took the empty locker?" I asked. Just wonderful. English partner now locker buddy?
"Guess so." He smirked and opened his locker. It was fairly empty.
"Love your shirt!" Alli screamed at me and walked away. Eli heard her and started to read my shirt.
"You have a child?" He asked curiously. He was getting some books out of the locker.
"Yeah." I said proudly. I might be a teen mom but I was proud.
"Gender and how old?" Eli closed his locker and stared at me.
"I have a son named Nick and he's two and a half months. Want to see a picture?" I asked.
"Sure." I pulled out my wallet and showed him a picture of me and Nick.
"He's a cute baby." Eli complimented.
"Thanks." I smiled. Maybe he wasn't so bad.
I put my wallet away and looked up to see Fitz walking towards me. I mentally cringed. After he left, I cried. I even cried myself to sleep.
"Clare. We still up for later?" Fitz asked. I could see him staring right at my shirt.
I nodded and he walked away from me. Eli stared at me with green curious eyes.
"What?" I asked innocently, actually knowing what he was looking for.
"What are you exactly still up with Fitz?" Eli asked in a disgusted voice.
"He's Nick's dad." I explained. I looked at my shoes to avoid his reaction.
"You went out with him and ended up conceiving his child?" Eli asked, disbelieving me.
"Yes, yes I did." This time I really wanted to smack him.
"I heard you used to be called Saint Clare. What happened to her?" Eli asked, reminded of who I was before Fitz.
"Let's see. Saint Clare's parents divorced and her then boyfriend cheated on her with her best friend. Then she got close to Fitz and changed into Slut Clare." I explained, not really caring about my past. It was said and done.
"Well Clare, you're not a slut." He said, smirked, and walked away.
I stared at him as he walked away. He's so confusing. I walked to homeroom and it ended really quickly.
By English, I had a few questions for Eli. Luckily Dawes assigned us partner work that was quite easy.
I finished rather quickly and decided to interrogate him.
"So what's your life past?" I saw him write his last sentence and looked up at me.
"I was born in British Columbia. My dad's a shock jock and I drive a vintage hearse named Morty. My last girlfriend cheated on me and then I moved here." Eli summarized his past.
"You named your car?" I asked. I think that's the first person I've met that names their car.
"I like to stand out." Eli shrugged. The bell rang a second later.
"Obviously." I smiled and got up to leave. Eli reached out and grabbed my arm.
"Hey. You wanna get something at the Dot later?" He asked, smiling this time.
"I'll be there at four." I smiled and made my way over to lunch.
:D
Fitz or Eli?