MERRY BELATED CHRISTMAS FANFICTION! I wrote an insane one shot just for you!
A bit of background: This is set in an alternate universe after the third Son of Dathomir book. (For those of you who aren't familiar with this, basically after the Lawless Maul escapes Sidious, captures Dooku and tries to form an alliance, while Obi-Wan, Tiplee, Aayla Secura, and Windu track him down to an asteroid. There they have a sweet showdown, but Maul knocks the Jedi out with an explosion, and escapes. At least, I think so. Please don't hurt me...) In my version, however, the Jedi beat Maul and Dooku, capturing them, and effectively end the war. There is only one bit of unfinished business on Obi-Wan's part...
I wrote this because of my constant issue with Obi-Wan. I love the guy, but as soon as he thinks that showing a particular emotion will violate the Jedi Code, he shuts down and becomes an unfeeling robot. (Just my interpretation of the guy... don't get mad...) Which means that naturally, I became angry when he described the Lawless as "not going so well". Honestly! That's how you describe a 9/10 reading check, not watching your beloved soulmate get brutally tortured to death!
Just my two cents. I felt that this was missing, so I decided to write this. Happy reading!
The only thing separating them was a door.
A lifetime's worth of agony, hatred, and conflict separated by only a door.
A desperate mission to destroy each other, only destroying themselves.
And those they loved.
Obi-Wan Kenobi clenched his eyes shut, relying on his wrappings of pain to flex his resolve. Amazing how one outstretched hand, one stride through a door could bloom into so much. Could reopen the wounds, melt his shroud into a mess of oozing grief. Resurrect people from the past.
He'd walk through, a passage from one state to another. On this side of the door, General Kenobi stood, an artfully chiseled facade of the man inside. Deplorable for his manner, stoic to a fault, yet more composed than the man from the other side. He held the keys, the power of opening and closing.
Upon passing the threshold, the impurities are upon him. Latching onto him, dragging him from his state of calm into a sea of tears. The concealment dissolves, ascetic distortions bowing before passion, when he becomes Ben Kenobi. Tragedy upon tragedy, the hardships of others consuming him, blue flames eating away at his resolve.
Nails reopening a cut on his palm, Obi-Wan breathed heavily, revitalized by the influx of air. The mirage of preparedness clenched its confident fingers around him once more, softly slamming his palm onto the smooth surface. The moment fractured into millions, time seemingly slowing down as the image of his defeated foe flooded his brain.
Sith. Enemy. Criminal. Terrorist. Brother. Murderer. Monster.
Maul.
"I was wondering when you'd come." He faced opposite Kenobi, legs crossed in a meditative stance.
"Unresolved... matters." Obi-Wan's flimsy excuse hung in the air for a moment.
"Unresolved feelings. Hatred."
Obi-Wan ground his teeth. Maul could always predict his every move.
"Not only that." He admitted, swirling pools of darkness dancing in his view, eyes clenched shut.
"It's important enough for your presence." Maul noted.
"Yes."
"You didn't strike me as the celebratory type."
The dark retreated, the world shifting back into place. "What do you mean?"
"You're avoiding your own heroism- or rather, the representation of it. You don't think you deserve it."
A sigh melted from Obi-Wan. "Parade."
"And you're spending it... with me."
"The Clone War may have ended, but I still have battles to fight."
"You ended it."
"This isn't about the Clone War."
"It's about our... rivalry." Maul cut the truth from Obi-Wan's statement.
"This should have been a moment of victory. But... it's tainted, poisoned by the shadow of the woman who wanted it most."
"And I killed her."
"I wanted to tell you that you failed. But then you wouldn't have, would you?"
His realization fizzled in the empty silence.
"But neither of us succeeded. Both of us failed."
"Is there... a purpose, to your visit?"
"Ah," Obi-Wan's hand tugged at the base of his auburn locks. "I... I... closure..." He leaned into his forearm. "Thought I'd know what to do..."
"Your victory is hollow. Emptied by what you have lost."
"Yes. Nothing is really over, is it?"
"It was engineered to be this way."
"Neither of us can ever forgive each other."
"Strange. I assumed that was what you came to do."
"No. Not at all. You have committed irredeemable acts. You turned me against myself, seeking vengeance for something that really wasn't my fault. Your rampage scrubbed out what little hope I had left."
"Both of us lost." The slightest tremor wove itself into Maul's words, veiled by truth.
"None of this would have happened if you had accepted that this wasn't my fault!" The shrill note in his voice betrayed his pretense of control, anger leaking from his outburst.
"Not your fault? Who bisected who?" the Sith carved into Obi-Wan's convictions.
"What choice did I have?" Obi-Wan pleaded.
"I promised I'd break you like you broke me."
"By worsening the situation."
"By killing the Duchess."
The world lost its depth, fading into a single panoramic image. This wasn't real any longer, no, Obi-Wan froze, locked into place, falling back into the world of his nightmares. His breath caught in his throat, heart pounding at his chest as though it was the only boundary between him and his love. The splintered remembrances in his sight formed Satine, her visage a mosaic of the past. A dark glove overlapped onto her, his fingers vainly reaching for her own. Her choke tightened around him, tying him in helplessness...
"Completely unequal. It was a direct provocation." Obi-Wan spat.
"On the contrary," Maul uncoiled, standing opposite Obi-Wan. "It was absolutely equal. You took my life, I took her's."
"That's exactly my point! She was innocent, she didn't know why she died!" A sob twisted itself from Obi-Wan's lips.
"She was a tool. By killing her, I killed a part of you." Maul's arms crossed confidently across his chest.
"Satine Kryze is not a tool." Obi-Wan's voice deepened into a hoarse growl.
"Satine Kryze isn't. Was, perhaps..." Maul's lackadaisical words tore at Obi-Wan's mangled heart.
The hurt ran from Obi-Wan's widened eyes, balling his hands into fists.
"If I could, I would hate you."
"If you hadn't chosen this, you would've loved her."
"This is pointless." Old guilt drilled into Obi-Wan's stability, funding his retreat.
"Oh?"
"I can't hate you, neither can I forgive you, so this rally is useless to me."
"I ask you again: Why are you here?"
The words caught the tails of a sigh. "Guilt. No matter what I told you, I blame myself for everything."
"You pretend to blame me." Obi-Wan's gaze swiveled to the floor.
"I know that she wouldn't have wanted me to hate you."
"Yet you wish you could." The words twisted, splinters burying themselves in Obi-Wan's heart.
Obi-Wan's face snapped up, realization crushing his pain.
"I just want to part on even terms. Knowing that there neither of us is the hero, neither of us is the villain- that there is nothing to describe this. It is what it is."
Obi-Wan outstretched his palm. Closed the gap between his and Satine's hands.
Darth Maul's hand animatedly raised, thrusting itself into Obi-Wan's.
"For the time being."
PUT YOUR HAND IN MY HAND AND WE'LL STAND!
LET THE SKY FALL...
Ahem! Sorry... You can probably guess what inspired the ending... ;)
For those of you who remember my message in the Rebellion, you can probably see why I got uncomfortable with this relationship. Maul and Obi friends? Just NO. He killed Satine, for crying out loud!
At the same time, however, I have to respect Obi-Wan's character and how he wouldn't completely MURDER Maul in a situation like this (like I would...). Grrr.
Laugh Until You Obitine Out!