I don't know why I decided to write this but I just binge watched the entirety of Parks and Recreation and I love the relationship between Ron and Tammy- no matter how dysfunctional it is. This idea kept sticking with me so I thought I'd write it and see what you think.
Enjoy.
She was amazing.
Leslie couldn't argue with that as she drove Ron's car away from the awards, occasionally glancing across to see the redhead slumped in the chair, her arms crossed across her chest in anger. Tammy was amazing in a way that made Leslie gag. She had this incredible ability to turn Ron Swanson, a man who was the most intimidating figures she knew, into an incoherent babbling mess! How could Ron attract intelligent women like Diane but also psychopaths like his ex-wives and still end up being drawn in by Tammy? Well Leslie wasn't going to let Ron make that mistake again, she was not going to let him pick the psychotic Tammy over the lovely Diane and she wasn't going to stop this car until they were far away from the woodworking awards.
"You won't stop me from finding Ron," Tammy stated angrily, glaring across at the blonde while Leslie shook her head. "I will always find him."
"I won't let you ruin his relationship with Diane. They're happy, Ron's actually happy in a relationship, and you're not going to destroy that," Leslie argued, surprised when Tammy didn't immediately respond. "Why do you do it Tammy? Why do you keep coming back?" the blonde questioned, while Tammy shook her head and ran her fingers through her hair. "There are other men out there, there might even be someone out there who is just as a crazy as you are, someone who might make you happy one day, so why are you so obsessed with Ron?"
"You won't understand Leslie," the redhead stated in frustration, glancing out of the window at the darkness around them. Tammy wasn't sure where they were exactly but she might be able to make it back to the awards if she got out of the car the next time they hit a red light and ran. "I need to talk to Ron Leslie, you won't stop me."
"You two never just talk Tammy," Leslie scoffed, shaking her head as she continued to drive away from the awards. "Most of the time the cops end up getting involved when you two talk, the last time you attempted to talk, you ended up getting married again, having sex in a courtroom, and getting arrested," the blonde said quickly, shaking her head at the redhead while Tammy groaned, her head moving to rest against the dashboard of the car. "And then he divorced you again."
"You need to stop this car," Tammy stated. "I'm not stopping this car Tammy," Leslie responded quickly, her head shaking. Did Tammy really think she was that stupid? She was not going to give her the chance to escape. She was not going to be the one who was responsible for Tammy destroying such a sweet and loving relationship.
"Stop this car now," Tammy shouted, breathing out slowly. "Either stop this car Leslie or I will be sick everywhere and I will aim it at you," the brunette declared, her voice full of tension as Leslie began to slow the car down. It was obvious that something was wrong with Tammy, Leslie could see in her face that she wasn't pretending to be sick. Stopping the car, the blonde watched as the petit woman practically flung herself out of the car and began to vomit against the side of the road.
"You better be having a nice evening Ron," Leslie whispered to herself, her head shaking when Tammy reopened the door of the car and climbed back in, her eyes shutting when she rested back in her chair. "You okay?" the blonde asked, watching the other woman in silence when she started to shake her head. Opening her eyes, Tammy sighed before she reached down for her purse and opened it, removing something before holding it out towards the blonde. "What's this?" Leslie asked, taking the paper from Tammy's fingers before reaching up to switch on the car light. "Is this a joke?" Leslie whispered, staring down at the black and white image in her hand.
"No, it's why I needed to talk to Ron tonight," Tammy said quietly, unable to stop herself from looking down at the image Leslie was holding.
"You're pregnant," Leslie whispered, unable to take her eyes off the sonogram in her hands. "And it's Ron's?" she asked quietly, the redhead glaring at her before nodding. "You're pregnant with Ron's baby?"
"Yes Leslie, I am pregnant with Ron's baby. I am officially carrying new life," Tammy declared, noticing the doubt that began to decorate Leslie's face. "That was conceived in this car," she smirked, watching the disgust grow on the blonde's face. "In that seat actually," she added, glancing down at Leslie's seat, the blonde groaning and quickly climbed out of the vehicle. "Outside of JJ's Diner."
"I didn't need to know any of that," Leslie groaned in disgust, bending down to look into the vehicle while Tammy laughed to herself. "You didn't even try to talk to him tonight," the blonde stated, unable to stop herself from remembering how much of Tammy she had seen this evening. "You were your usual sex crazed she-devil self the moment you walked in, you didn't exactly scream expectant mother," Leslie declared, falling silent when Tammy muttered something under her breath. "What was that?" she asked, looking across at Tammy as the other woman sighed and continued to run her fingers across her stomach nervously.
"I wasn't expecting to see her," Tammy said quietly, Leslie sighing in realisation. So the sex crazed lunatic who had managed to make every sentence sexual and had flashed her underwear all night at Ron and any man who walked past had acted up because she was jealous of Diane and Ron. "Three months ago, he was lonely and miserable and he wanted me. He wanted me a lot," she whispered, a groan leaving Leslie's mouth while Tammy shook her head in frustration. "Leslie, I don't want to talk about this. I want to go home and shower, I'm pretty sure I got sick down this dress," she stated, glancing down at the red material that covered her body while Leslie sighed, not sure what to do. She didn't want to destroy Ron's evening with Diane; they were a good couple, Diane made Ron happy without making him completely insane like either of the Tammy's did. However, she couldn't be the woman who got in the way of Ron finding out about his child.
"Why are you two always complicated? How were you guys ever married for more than a couple of days?" Leslie moaned in frustration, groaning again when Tammy laughed gently. Ron Swanson was going to be a father. He was going to be a father to Tammy's child. A living, breathing innocent human being whose picture she was holding in her hand. "How far along are you?"
"Thirteen weeks," Tammy admitted, smiling weakly before holding her hand out, Leslie passing the image back to her in silence.
"And everything's okay?" Leslie asked quietly, still amazed that she was even having this discussion with the woman she had once visited in jail for having sex in a courtroom after remarrying Ron.
"Everything's fine," Tammy stated before sighing, her head shaking again. "Are we going to stay here all night?" she asked, glancing around at the darkness surrounding them. "Or can we go home?"
"I don't know," Leslie admitted. She wanted to keep Tammy away from Ron and Diane, she wanted to give them a chance to be happy but she couldn't keep Tammy away forever when she was pregnant with his child. "Ron Swanson a dad," the blonde whispered, still amazed at the idea. Ron wasn't the best with children, Leslie knew that better than most from working with him at numerous park events across the years. "Ron with a baby," Leslie commented, trying to remember whether she had ever seen Ron near a baby, let alone holding a tiny human in his hands. "A father," she whispered to herself, glancing across to see Tammy asleep, clutching the sonogram in her hands. "Tammy Swanson a mom."
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