only for you and me
the end of december was coming on,
only for you and me
The General Specific - Band of Horses
Disclaimer: Gossip Girl does not belong to me, but if someone would give me a few million dollars, then I could buy the rights and that sounds pretty cool to me.
Author's Note: I promised Chiara months ago that I would write her a first time fic and now I've finally done it. This one's for you Chiara, don't hate me if it's bad, I tried. Love ya.
She can't stop smiling.
It reflects back at her from the snowflakes she had made with Vanessa earlier; that they had hung up on the walls, and everytime she finds her lips spreading just a little more, the tight pressure in her cheeks increasing. The bubble of uninhibited joy floating her chest threatens to carry her off, her toes dragging across the floor as she floats through the gallery, waiting for Dan, the bright glow of her smile lighting up the darkness. Turing to face one of the snowflakes, Serena lifts her hand, traces the tip of her index finger along the deep curve of her mouth. She'd been nervous about his present ever since she came up with the idea this morning.
Serena runs her fingers through her hair one more time, scratching over the scalp, teasing the roots to inject a little volume. He loves her hair when it's unruly and curly, falling into her face and brushing over his skin when she leans down to kiss him. She falls back down onto the mattress with the blue sheets she had positioned in the middle of the room, as little paper snowflakes fly around the room with the help of a ventilator.
A soft peel of laughter rings through her chest when she sees him entering the gallery. "Merry Christmas," she says, the look he gives her when he sees her and the room she had set up makes her stomach flip, desire flooding hot through her abdomen.
"Do you like it? Do you think it's cheesy?" She asks, always followed by her 4 year old laugh, which only appears when she is around him. There are a few things that she's only experiencing with Dan. This is her first time sleeping with a guy she has feelings for. This is her first time waiting for the right moment for it to happen. This is her first time being in a serious relationship. This is her first time being truly happy. He's changed her, he makes her see how great love can be.
She can see how in awe he is across the room, their smiles radiating the warmth and happiness of this moment.
"No, no, it's- it's incredible. How did you do this?" He stutters, taking off his jacket as he approaches her, his genuine smile making her heart flutter.
"Well, I had help from my elves." She chuckles, adjusting her position on the mattress. Catching his eye, she tosses him a sly grin, a whirlwind of emotions and excitement running through her mind. This is her first time surprising a guy with something that isn't materialistic and she couldn't be more relieved that it was all working out for her.
"Your present is waiting at home, but- um, I did bring a little pre-present for you."
He takes some folded pieces of paper out of his pocket and hands them Serena, never breaking their eye contact even for a second. She can see that he is nervous and so is she, because she doesn't know what to expect, doesn't know what this is. But she is excited at the same time, because knowing Dan, it could only be something great.
Quickly unfolding it, the first thing she sees is the date, written in the right corner. 10-08-05. It makes click in her head right away and she looks up at him again. Her heart is pounding so quickly in her chest, she's certain she is going to have a heart attack soon. "Wait, this is your story." It's partly a question, partly a statement.
"Yeah, it's the original. It's right out of the spiral notebook." She chuckles at that, studying him and the pieces of paper in her hand.
Her mouth becomes dry, because she's scared. Scared to read it, scared to find out what exactly had happened on October 8th, 2005. A delightful pink hue is settling on her cheeks as her eyes fly back up to his. "I'm kinda scared to read it. What happened on October 8th, 2005?"
"Um, well, I was accidentally invited to a birthday party, where I met a girl. She only spoke two sentences to me, but I've never forgotten her."
She can't bring herself to look down at the story again, not when he looks at her with such uninhibited joy and love scribbled in the lines around his eyes. His story is about her. Only her. Not about Vanessa or any other girl he's ever been interested in before he had met her. This is the most beautiful thing anyone has ever given her. She's speechless. This is the first time she's actually speechless. Serena van der Woodsen- Speechless.
She bites her lips as she tries to find the right words. The butterflies, the excitement, it all spills into her soft smile when she speaks. "Wait, your story's about me?"
He nods and she stares at him for a few seconds, her eyes full of love and passion and flattery. She finds herself canting closer to him, until there's not an inch of space left between them. Capturing his lips with hers, she leaves her words there with her kiss. Everything she wants to say, but can't, because she can't express in words how happy he makes her, how happy this makes her, how much it means to her that he has written a story about her. Dan wraps his hand around her body, swallows her moan when he sucks her bottom lip between his own. Serena runs her hands up his arms and across his chest, a tremor of excitement rumbling through her body. Sometimes she still has trouble believing that he is hers, and only hers. That his body belongs to her. The hard muscles of his chest and shoulders, the way they feel under her hands and tighs. The strength in his tighs, the span of his hands, the deep dimples at the base of his spine. She loves how he can take her from feeling scared to beautiful and precious with just the touch of his hands and the sound of her name in his mouth. Because this is the first time she's been with a guy for more than few days, this is the first time she's experiencing a love like this.
Breaking the kiss, she cups her dress with her hands and unknots it, sliding it down so that it reveals her bra. She can feel his eyes on her body and she swallows hard, her breath becoming more unsteady by the minute.
"Are we really gonna do this?" He asks and she knows that he is just as nervous as she is. But this is the right time and the right place and it feels right. She's not scared anymore, she wants to feel him, wants him to make love to her. So she nods and whispers a small "Yeah".
He caresses her cheeks with his hands and kisses her again, this time a lot more passionately. Her hands curl around the buttons of his shirt as she unbuttons them one by one, as he finds himself dragging her lower lip between his teeth, all so that he can hear that little noise she makes that's somewhere between a groan and a gasp.
Dan hums when she pulls him down with her, hands running over the soft fabric of her dress as his mouth finds the crook of her neck. He licks his way up to her ear, traces the tip of his tongue over the shell. "Let's just hope my Dad won't plan a spontaneous trip to his gallery tonight."
She gives him a breathy laugh and tilts her head to the side, an invitation she's extended many times before. Serena works her hands to his pants and unbuttons them, as her knuckles curl reflexively when he bites down on the base of her neck, her nails digging sharply into his back as his teeth and lips form a powerful vacuum against her skin.
Dan leans back for a second and catches her eye, a bright smile flirting with his lips. "You know, I'm really happy to be here with you tonight." Serena sucks in a hard breath when his hand slides between their bodies, fingers slipping under her dress to caress the skin on her inner left tigh. "Me too." She lets out with a groan, the touch of his hands on her skin making her go crazy.
Taking advantage of the angle of his body, Serena rolls them over, her mouth trailing over his stomach as she makes her way further down, getting him out of his shirt, pulling his pants and boxers off as she goes. She bites and licks at his tighs as she pushes the pants the rest of the way down, fingers sliding into the tight elastic at the tops of his socks. She tugs at his left ankle and Dan lifts his leg a bit, allowing her to slide the layers down over his flexed foot. The right foot follows and Serena sits up straight on her knees again, the heavy mass of his pants and shirt clutched in her left fist.
Never breaking eye contact, she slowly pulls away from him, the hand between his legs going slack. She's flying on her back in the next second, Dan hauling over her and attacking her mouth passionately. The jeans and shirt fall from her hand and she has no idea where they land, doesn't care. All she wants right now, all she can feel, is him. His skin against hers, his hands and mouth on her body.
A disappointed whimper slips off her tongue when Dan breaks the kiss. Placing his hands on her shoulder, he spins her around, presses the length of his naked body along her back. The searing heat of his chest burns through the sin fabric of her dress, scalding her skin and leaving her aching. His hands slip down to her ribs as he buries his nose in her hair, mouth laying claim to another tract of skin along the side of her neck. Serena runs her fingers over his forearms as his hold moves to her waist, tracing over the flex and play of the muscles and tendons hiding below her skin.
Grasping the hem of her dress between an index finger and thumb, Dan slips it down her legs. His hands press into her abdomen as he slides under the flowing fabric and she sighs at the feel of him on her bare skin. Lightly, his fingers traverse the arc of her ribs, skirting around the edges of her breast before coming to a triumphant halt at the peak of her shoulders. She shifts against him, grinding her ass into the cradle of his hips. Dan slips one finger under the thin strap of her bra and slides it down to hang limply against her bicep.
"You are so beautiful." He whispers into her ear, the words dripping with desire, and she shudders, her knees turning to water as she lifts her arms, looping them backward around his neck to hold him close. Serena's head lolls against his chest when his hands start drifting, tracing over the lace cups of her bra, dipping down below the scalloped edges of her matching underwear. He drags the remaining bra strap down over her shoulder, chasing the delicate rosé fabric with his lips.
His lips float over her abdomen, fleeting kisses that stir the nest of butterflies in her stomach, the tiny wings beating wildly. The scrape of his nails at her hips raises goosebumps on her skin and she leans into him, seeking more. Dan follows the descent of her underwear with his mouth, sliding his tongue across her as the fabric passes over her knees.
Letting the panties fall, he presses a quick kiss to the crease of her tigh. Serena pushes on his shoulders and leans back, uses his bent elbows to scuttle up the mattress until just his feet are hanging over the edge.
Knowing that this is his first time, she decides to take the lead. Crawling on top of him, her open mouth drags over his skin as she ascends. She watches his eyes roll back when she flicks her tongue at the base of his erection, smiles into the warm skin of his stomach. Hands planted on his chest, she swings her leg over his hips and lowers herself down, her ass resting high on his tighs.
She rides him expertly, slowly and softly, rolling her hips and tilting her body, shifting over him as they both groan and pant. Dan's hands slide up her sides, hooking under her arms and pulling. She grants his silent request and leans down, drapes her body over his chest. He thrusts up into her, hands spread wide over her ass and she bites down on his shoulder, affirmations trapped in the back of her throat. The connection of their two bodies feels heavenly and she wishes it would last forever.
Groaning, Dan rolls them over, bending down over her as she spreads her legs. Serena's hands roam over her breasts, plucking and rolling her nipples as he softly thrusts into her, the wet sound of their connection filling the room. His teeth sink into her right calf and she jerks, her toes curling next to his.
Heavy pressure builds at the base of her spine and she digs her fingers into his ass, carves divots into the back of his neck with the other hand. "Yes." Her voice sounds foreign to her own ears, a high pitched whine that she wants to stop but can't. "Yes, Dan. Right - Don't stop. Need you. Don't stop."
His mouth tears across her chest, sharp nips and long licks that make her body arch into him. Leaning to the side, Dan lifts his arm and wedges both hands under her body. He leans back, pulling her up to sit in his lap. The tangled ends of her hair tumble over her shoulders as she lets her forehead fall heavily against his neck. Her body rocks from side to side as he shifts under her, arranging her legs. Gentle fingers sweep the hair back from her cheek and she lifts her head, meets his gaze.
"Hi." It's barely a whisper, a single syllable full of so much love that her heart stutters, fluttering high in her throat.
"Hi," she replies, brushing her mouth over his before pressing their foreheads together.
They rock into each other slowly, the sound of their shared breaths is all she can hear. Her hands roam over his back and shoulders, mapping out the shapes she memorized the last time they had been naked together in his bed. Dan's head falls to the side, forehead landing in the sweaty curve of her neck. She can feel his lips moving against her collarbone, silent words that burn her skin, and she twines her arms around his neck, fingers running through his damp hair.
Pressing a kiss to his temple she opens her eyes and he takes her all in; the tangled mess of her hair, her mouth red and swollen, cheeks flaming with heat.
She doesn't think she's ever been so happy.
Her eyes flutter closed again when Dan slips a hand between their bodies, urging her on as he circles her clit with the pad of his thumb. She shudders, her body turning liquid in his arms. Dan follows her right away, the vowels of her name stretched out in a song of celebration.
They fall over together, landing in the scattered pile of the pillows. Dan folds her into his side, his lips pressed to the top of her head, ragged breath rustling through her hair. Serena kisses his chest and looks up, smiles at the blissed out look on his face.
"Merry Christmas, Dan."
He hums, stares at her with hazy eyes. "Thank you for this."
Serena smiles. "No, thank you for this and the story."
A tidal wave of emotion crashes through her chest, breaching the dam of her ribs and drowning her heart. The way he loves her so unabashedly - no doubts or reservations just pure, unadulterated affection - never fails to leave her feeling astonished and so very lucky. He believes in her when she can't do it for herself, supports her even when she tries to push him away. He is what she wants, what she needs.
Dan.
"This might be by far the best Christmas ever."
She clears her throat and looks up, gives him a watery smile. "Who knows, maybe next year is going to be even better."
Craning his neck, Dan leans down and gives her a lazy kiss, his lips soft and slow. "I don't think it's possible to get any better," he whispers.
Thank you for reading. Your toughts and comments are always very much appreciated.