Hercules Busts Heads!
The mighty Hercules stands at his Pillars, guarding the entrance to the ancient lands. For once, all is quiet and peaceful. Will our hero be able to enjoy a nice lunch break with his wife? Most certainly not!
Crash!
"What ho!" Hercules exclaims, "I'm sure glad that I have my Hermes-2-Go lunchbox! Great for on the go quests and travels- all I need to do is whistle, and the lunchbox flies to my location! For viewers at home, to get your subscription to Hermes-2-Go Lunchbox Co, please make a 2 gold drachma offering directly to the company! But now, I must find out who dares trespass on my island!"
The beefy Hercules scouts the area for anything strange. What will he find?
"Come out, foul demon, and witness my wrath!"
"Hissss!"
"What creature is lurking in the woods? Show yourself!"
"Hissss!"
"Then you give me no choice! Hiya!"
Hercules bursts into the woods, ready to attack using his rad skills!
"And it's all thanks to Golden Apple Cereal! All you need for a complete breakfast! Now come here demon so I can strangle you with my bare hands- wait! It can't be!"
Duh, duh, duh!
"Achelous has stolen my Hydra hat! I got that at the Monster Convention you fiend! Give it back!"
"No! You stole Deianira from me! And my horn! Why should I give you the hat?"
Shock! Horror! How will the well-toned Hercules get out of this one? Stay tuned to find out! But first- a word from our sponsor!
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And now... back to the show!
"I know, Achelous, if you give me the hat, I'll trade you my awesome Rock of Destiny!"
"Rock of Destiny? I've never heard of that."
"That's because it's Top Secret! No-one knows but me and you. Come here, and I'll give you an exclusive preview!"
"Oh, I do like exclusive previews! All right then, let's have a look."
"Behold!"
"Wow! Hercules- that rock is almost as shredded as you! Gimme! Gimme!"
"Okay, I'll give it to you..."
Thwack!
"Direct to your face! Ha, ha, ha! Take that Achelous! I'll be taking that hat- and going to lunch!"
And so, our hero walks off to enjoy his lunch. Just another day's work for- the mighty Hercules!