I always have the idea on writing about life after marriage, like I did in one of my previous Shaman King fic. This fic is mostly Sakura-centric. Echizen Sakura is the daughter of Ryoma and Sakuno, for clarification. She has nothing to do with my created character in So This is Christmas, I just can't think of another name.
Disclaimer: I got a mid-term tomorrow. Writing fanfic is a lot more enjoyable.
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I hate my father.
Yes, you hear me. I, Echizen Sakura, daughter of the famous Japanese tennis star, currently world-ranked number three, who was voted twice as sexiest sportsman alive, Echizen Ryoma, hate him to death.
All that people care is how good he is in his profession. I do admit he is really good (he does have fifteen Grand Slam titles at the age of twenty four), and he has the handsome look that attracts even my schoolmates, not to mention the fangirls (as he puts it) all over the nation and the world. He is perfect in every Japanese woman's fantasies.
But that is all because they don't know him. They know Echizen Ryoma the tennis player, not Echizen Ryoma the father, the husband.
He is never at home. He's always too busy with his matches and interviews. My home consists of my mother and me, and my cat, only. Oka-san seems not to mind otou-san's constant absence, always wearing a warm smile when otou-san appears on television. She keeps telling me that they both anticipate this when he married her at the age of eighteen. She also stresses that otou-san loves me a lot.
I highly doubt it.
When has he ever shown any sign of loving me? During my birthdays or whenever I achieve something, he never says things like 'I'm proud of you, Sakura' or 'I love you'. It's always 'hn.' Sometimes I wonder if he has difficulty in speaking properly AND POLITELY to people. One time I won against a strong opponent in a tennis match in my elementary school. All he said was 'mada mada dane.'
Or that he is not my real father at all, but just someone who uses my oka-san.
Really, I think that is one reasonable assumption. My uncles tell me that oka-san is a beautiful woman (it's true) who attracts many males' attention when they were studying in the same school, but oka-san only had her eyes on otou-san. Oka-san never objects to him: she always obliges. Yet this so-called otou-san often rejects oka-san's opinions and criticizes on…basically everything about her, from her tennis skills to her hair. That arrogant bastard! How dare him! He knows very well that he's one of the best players in the world, and he seems to have an interest in complaining about oka-san's hair since I knew ABC. The times he talks to me? I ignore him. He never gives me any warm and secure feelings like oka-san does anyway. I sometimes wonder what oka-san sees in this stupid man and marries him.
I never like or love him. No. To me, he is not even an important person in my life. I have my oka-san, and that's enough. I don't need otou-san.
I don't need him.
-
'YOU'RE WHAT?'
'Calm down, Sakuno,' he reassured her. 'I don't need another Tomoka in this house.'
'But Ryoma…' she looked at him desperately. She was just preparing lunch in the kitchen when he surprised him by coming home early. It was a nice day for her, knowing that her husband was finally home after winning another tournament in Berlin. Yet she did not expect him to surprise her in that way after catching an early flight and arriving in Japan for just an hour.
'I mean it. I already have everything I want to achieve. Wimbledon, French Open, U.S. Open…I've won all major tournaments that a tennis player can only dream of.'
'But what about regaining the position of being top of the world?' She put the dish on the table and sat next to him. It was rare for them to spend some quality time together, and she had prepared even his favourite dish to welcome his return. 'Isn't it that you want to regain Number One again? You only lost it because of your injury!'
'Sakuno,' he placed a soft kiss on her forehead, pulling her into an embrace. 'I'm tired, of everything. I'm tired of travelling around the world without seeing you and Sakura every day. I feel better when you're watching me from stand, not from satellite.'
She gave a sigh. 'You know why I can't come with you, even if I want to so badly.' He hugged her from behind. 'I can't leave Sakura behind, and she can't leave because of school.'
'I know, and that's why I want to retire from tennis. I want to spend more time with my family. Besides, Sakura hates me. I want to do something to repair our relationship.' Sakuno frowned.
'She doesn't.'
'Yes she does, but I can't blame her though. I can't blame my own daughter for loathing me when I'm not even there with her, for her, can't I?' He mocked himself disappointedly, releasing yet another breath.
She turned to face him directly, and kissed him fully. She felt it again, the warmth of his lips and the passion and love that she longed for. Her forehead leaned on his. 'Sakura-chan does not hate you, anata. She's just six. She needs time to accept you.'
The twenty-four-year-old closed his eyes, flattered by his wife's embrace and consideration. He sighed and wrapped his arms around her thin waist, bringing her closer to his body. He knew he had to do something. He just did not know what, how.
-
Carrying the name Echizen is not as good as everyone thinks. People's eyes glister at the mention of 'one of the greatest tennis players ever' and comment that I must be proud of my father. I just give them a glare and do not participate in their brain-washing conversation.
Today is his homecoming day. After winning another tournament in Europe, he should be back some hours later. But I don't care. Uncle Eiji and Uncle Momo must be planning yet another party to congratulate his victory. I don't really mind, as I can play with Uncle Fuji's camera, also Tezuka Tarou and Kikumaru Tenma, two very good friends of mine in school. Also, there will be other children that I can spend time with, so I can avoid any uncomfortable moment of meeting my otou-san.
'Hey, isn't that Echizen Ryoma?'
My head jerks towards the said voice, and I look at everyone's awed direction. My vision lands on a tall, green-haired person who is leaning on the school gate carelessly, looking at the ground. I gasp loud.
Why is he here? Shouldn't oka-san be picking me up every day after school ends? Besides, shouldn't his plane arrive at Japan hours later?
'Sakura.' I hear him address my name, and I reluctantly follow him to leave the school. Where is oka-san? I hate it when people start to whisper behind my back, singing praises like 'wow that's the famous tennis star', 'he's so cool' or any annoying statements. Some mothers even look at him with full lust in their eyes. Sick people. They know nothing about him.
We walk in silence. It's always like this. When I walk with oka-san, she asks me comfortably about my day, and I will happily describe every single detail of the events in school. But when I am with him, it seems like words do not exist.
'How's your day, Sakura?'
I choke on the ponta I am drinking. What just happened? Didn't he never give a damn about my life? Why is he trying to…trying to act like a parent now? These people are the most irritating type. They pretend to care about you and your little life, but they say that just to break the silence. They never really care.
'Sakura? Are you alright?' He stops and looks at me. I avoid his gaze deliberately. Mada mada dane. You're still a long way from being my father, otou-san. 'I'm fine.' I snort and continue walking, ignoring his raised eyebrows.
'Wait.' He grabs my arm. He grabs my arm!
'What?' I snap at him impatiently. Com'on, what do you want, Mr I'm-so-famous-that-you-must-oblige-to-everything-I-say?
'What's with that tone? I am your father. Show some respect.' He says it so calmly that reminds me of my godfather, Tezuka Kunimitsu. He holds my arm tighter and pulls me towards his front. I can feel his intense gaze on me. I cannot take it anymore. 'Sakura, talk to me.' There he goes again, using that authoritarian and dangerous voice to address me. I struggle and, probably because he never expects me to, I manage to break from his lock.
'Don't pretend to care about me when you never have!' I explode. I stare into his stunned and frightened eyes. 'You are never there when I need you. Always busy playing this man or that…even when you come back you spend time with Uncle Momo and not with me or oka-san!' I see his lips part, but I won't let him talk. 'It is oka-san who's always with me, not you! So stop acting like how a father should act!' I close my eyes. It feels so good to let my emotions go all out. I finish my declaration with one last blow. 'YOU ARE NOT MY FATHER! GO PLAY YOUR STUPID TENNIS! I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE DEAD OR ALIVE!'
I storm off, totally ignoring his bewildered countenance. Why should I care anyway? This man hurt me a lot. He never comforted me when I cried or hurt myself. He never padded my head and smiled at me, like my uncles always do. He never showed any concern over my existence.
He never cares, likes, or loves me.
I keep running until I find myself in a strange place. I look around to see dust floating in the air, causing me to cough a few times. Large machines are operating to lift some blocks and place them on another area. I blink. What is this place called? A congrution site? No, wait. I know the word. Contrution? No. It only makes me feel madder when I know I know the word but cannot name it.
'Who is that girl?' I hear someone murmur from a safe distance from me. It is a man wearing an interesting yellow cap, which reminds me of Donald Duck that I love to watch on TV. His glance leaves me and looks upward. Then he suddenly screams, 'hey girl, LOOK OUT!'
I follow his trace and raise my head. I can't really see anything but only notice the sky gets abruptly darker. I can no longer see the blue sky and white clouds, but a black object is falling onto me.
'AHHHH!' I can't move my legs: they are paralyzed on the spot where I am standing. I close my eyes tight and cover my head with my hands. I know what's going to happen. There you go, Echizen Sakura. This is your life and it's ending one second at a time.
But I feel nothing. I do not feel the intense pain I thought I would have to endure. Instead, I feel someone grabbing me, and my time zone suddenly shifts to another position. In less than a second, I hear a loud 'BANG' a metre away from me, and my back is pressing on two thick wires.
Thick wires?
I open my eyes and try to decipher what have happened. Instead, I see the golden orbs that belong to the last person I want to meet.
'Stu…stupid girl…' I hear him mutter weakly. I gasp in shock. I feel there is something in my heart that aches. My brain starts to dance and I fall on the ground, hitting the floor and feeling the physical pain. Before I pass out, I barely hear the same voice echoing in my head.
'Hey you! Call the emergency! We have an accident and a man's leg is…'
-
I hear murmurs. I hear people whispering. I hear words like Ochibi, Sakuno, surgery….
I slowly separate my eyelids. Where am I? I feel like lying on a soft bed, with a thin blanket covering my body. Wait, this doesn't feel like my t-shirt and skirt at all.
'Ah Sakura-chan,' I turn to find Uncle Fuji, who is smiling at me happily, 'you're finally awake.'
I feel a bit dizzy. I look around to find myself in a room with big windows and a vase of flowers next to me. 'Where…'
'You're in a hospital private room, Sakura-chan.' Uncle Eiji is here too. 'But nya, you've been sleeping for one whole day already.' I smile a bit at Uncle Eiji's usual enthusiastic tone.
'Now, Sakura-chan, do you remember what happened?' Uncle Fuji asks. I look at the ceiling, trying to figure out what happened before I have such deep sleep. My eyebrows widen in realization.
'Where's otou-san?' I blurt out.
'He's in another room.' Uncle Fuji states, but I feel there is a sense of sadness in his voice. 'He saved your life, Sakura-chan. According to the witness in the construction site, they had an accident where the logs fell from third floor, and somehow you happened to be there. But your father managed to pull you out of the landing position before it hit you.' Now I recall everything clearly. I remember seeing otou-san running out of nowhere and jumped, grabbing my waist, and we landed no far from whatever that made contact with the ground.
'Is he…alright?' I swallow hard when I say so. A feeling tells me something is wrong. Uncle Fuji and Uncle Eiji are silent.
'He…' The tall red-haired man begins, but trails off. Uncle Fuji looks at him knowingly, and takes over the talking. 'His…right leg was hit by the log, and he lost a lot of blood. He has undergone surgery and the doctors managed to save his leg, but,' Uncle Fuji breaks his eye contact with me, 'he will have trouble even for walking. Tennis will probably not be possible for him again.'
I don't need otou-san.
I don't need him.
He never showed any concern over my existence.
He never cares, likes, or loves me.
You are not my father. Go play your stupid tennis. I don't care if you are dead or alive.
I feel like destroying something beautiful. I just destroy my father's interest, love, career. All because of my selfishness.
Tears start rushing out of my eyes. I hated this man. I hated him. But somehow I can't stop myself from crying. Uncle Eiji and Uncle Fuji pull me into an embrace and I cry even harder. I can't believe myself. Why will someone who never cares about me risks his life to save me?
'Do you want to see him?' Uncle Fuji's gentle voice asks.
I nod.
-
I am led to a room in a different level. I overhear some nurses stating that this floor is for patients who recently have undergone surgery and under supervision. They also speak of some terms which I don't comprehend.
'This is the room.' Uncle Eiji stops and I think he wants me to go in first. I notice the door is slightly open, so I glance inside. I find otou-san lying on bed and oka-san sitting by his side, holding his hand. Judging from her red eyes, I guess oka-san has been crying too. Uncle Tezuka is standing on one side of the wall and Uncle Momo is by his side, resting his figure on the white concrete wall. Somehow I continue peeking inside but I do not want to enter the room right now. I just listen to their conversations from here.
'I think Oishi has explained to you already, Ryoma,' Uncle Tezuka speaks. I almost forget that Uncle Oishi is one of the doctors residing in this hospital. 'You will have trouble walking now.'
The atmosphere in the room is really tense. Nobody speaks for a while until Uncle Momo raises his voice. He scratches his spiky hair for a period of time. 'I guess as your manager, I have to do something about this and deal with the press, but I need your confirmation first.' I see otou-san nod and oka-san just stare at him, but I can't tell if it's a knowing look.
'Are you going to conduct physical therapy, along with declaring your retirement from tennis?'
I cover my mouth with my hand, and wait anxiously for his answer. Please say no, otou-san. Please say no.
'Yes.'
I am surprised to see otou-san smirk.
'I told you so.' He winks at oka-san, which earns his a light knock on his head. I am confused over his words, and it seems I'm not the only one. Uncle Fuji and Uncle Eiji have their mouths open too. 'What do you mean?' Even the ever stoned face of Uncle Tezuka falters a bit.
'I told Sakuno yesterday that I was considering about quitting from professional tennis.'
'Why would you?' Uncle Momo practically screams out loud. 'Your next tournament is supposed to be in a fortnight, and if you win, you'll regain world number one again!'
'Tennis is not everything, Momo-senpai,' otou-san reassures him. 'Besides, I have already achieved the fame once and have kept the title for three consecutive years. Now,' He turns to oka-san and touches her face, 'I want to spend more time with people here. Senpai-tachi, my cousins, your children, Sakuno, Sakura…I have had enough of travelling around and becoming the Japanese tennis player that the press loves. I want to be Echizen Ryoma, for now.
'Also, I want to rebuild my relationship with Sakura. I know she hates me for not being with her but with my racquet always. Heck, we even had an argument before this incident happened.' He chuckles, and I just stand still, looking at him disbelievingly. He knows it all along?
'Sakura-chan, your otou-san is not someone who is good at expressing his emotions.' I remember oka-san once told me that. 'So bear this in mind: even if he seems indifferent, actually he cares very much about me and you.'
'I can have another ten championships, but I treasure something else more.' Oka-san squeezes his hand, and I, all of a sudden, feel like crying again. I rush into the room, jump onto the bed and hug the man lying on bed.
'…Sakura?' I think he does not realize I have been eavesdropping all along their conversation, but I don't care. I let my tears go all out. I used to think he was just a cold man who would not care if I died. But girl was I wrong. I bury myself on his chest, and I feel two strong arms wrap around my tiny body, bringing me closer to feel his warmth.
What I do not know is that Uncle Tezuka signals for the uncles to leave the room. So only the Echizens remain in the room, where sunlight penetrates through the wide windows and enlighten the whole place.
'Gomen nazai, otou-san,' I manage to choke out amid my sobs, and I feel another pair of hands pull me softly into a big embrace.
'Che, stupid girl,' I hear his low voice mutter, 'must be your gene.' Yet I smile. I no longer feel any hatred or annoyance when he makes the same comment about oka-san and me. Oka-san peeks me on my forehead, then on otou-san's.
'I told you so.' She cheerfully says.
No matter what that means, otou-san gives a genuine smile that I have never seen on his face. I know that doesn't matter. Right now, I know I am part of a family of three now.
Without knowing it will be of four, soon.
-
-The End
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I know, it seems to end in a rush, and to be completely honest, I do not know how to end it elegantly. And this is the best I can do.
In case you've noticed, two phrases are quoted from the film Fight Club, one of my absolute favourite of all times. It sounds strange to put it here, but I'd say I quite like the way I put them.
Thanks for reading this one-shot, and probably I won't make a sequel to this. I'll focus on my other continuing stories and new ones soon to be published. But writing one-shots has actually so much fun that I may write some more in the future.
Anyway, back to my studies. Sigh. Please review after reading this! And also keep an eye on my other two to-be-updated stories, Dear Cousin and So This is Christmas. I'll be seeing you all again soon! =]
