A/N 1: I loved the scene at the end of Theatricality where Tina gets her look back, but I wanted to explore where the inspiration came from. This should span the week of Theatricality from Tina's POV.

A/N 2: I'm not really sure of the time line of this episode, so I've decided to set it over the course of a normal five day school week. Glee practice occurs everyday...

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Glee.

"And then they pulled him down and started making effing shreeking noises! Like they think they're effing vampires or something!" Puck laughs as he tells us all about Lauren Zices and the girls from the AV club attacking Jacob Ben Israel.

I have to admit, it's a little ridiculous. I mean, who seriously believes that (1) Robert Pattinson is a vampire, (2) Robert Pattinson is Edward Cullen, or what ever the twilight vampires are called, or even that (3) Twilight Vampires are real (THEY SPARKLE IN THE SUNLIGHT, FOR GOD'S SAKE) and (4) Anyone will notice a bunch of teen girls with falsely pointed eye teeth attacking a kind with a Jewfrow in Lima, Ohio?

I considering pointing this out to someone, but don't have the chance. There is no glee today so my mother expects me down at her law office by three thirty. The public defender's office can't always afford a babysitter, and even though I hate spending time with kids, my mother presses me into babysitting almost every day after school. She calls it community service, and promises that it will look excellent on my application to Smith or Brown. I don't think I want to go to college on the East Coast.

Monday of the next week, Figgins calls me into his office. I ask Mr. Shue to come with me. I'm generally a good kid. I don't get called into the principal's office. I mean, I'm the one who receives slushies facials, not gives them. Before I joined Glee, I generally tried to keep a low profile. Even now, I would like to fly under the radar, if only that were possible.

Figgins tells me that I'm in trouble. That I'm "Goth." Does he honestly think that I don't know I'm a Goth? I've had colored streaks in my hair pretty much since the first day I walked through the doors of McKinley High. I own more pairs black hand warmers than Artie owns sweater vests. How could you not know that I'm goth?

Figgins describes yesterday's events, only his description does not match Puck. He calls Twilight Fever a dark specter. Figgins seems convinced that vampires are real. I'm not sure how I can respect this man as my principal, if he thinks that vampires are real. When he accuses me of watching Twilight, I down play what my mother has said about Kristin Stewart, and leave out the anti RP rant all together. As a public defender and a staunch feminist, my mother would like girls my age to read things like Sylvia Plath, not Stephanie Meyer.

I don't know what to say when Figgins tells me I have to change my style. Mr. Shue is quick to jump to my rescue. He even admits to the principal that he used to dress like Kurt Cobain. Looking at old photos, I can see it. Mr. Shue would make a badass rocker. Figgins admits that he dressed like Elvis for a while, but insists that it is okay because Elvis was a Christian. I wonder about Figgin's obsession with Christianity. It seems kind of discriminatory. Figgins ends the meeting by threatening me with suspension.

I know I can't tell my parents. My mother will just get up in arms, and go do her storming feminist lawyer thing. She'll march down to the school, and involve the ACLU. She might even sue, and then there will be no money in the budget for Glee. My life would suck worse than it already does without our twice weekly meetings.

My father will frown disapprovingly, and remind me that a suspension will show up on my permanent record and the colleges don't like trouble makers. Then, he'll mutter something about my perfect cousin Paul. Paul is perfect because (1) Paul never once got a B minus in geometry the way I did, nor did he struggle in honors Algebra II. (2) He can play the violin. And the Viola. And the piano. (3) Paul got accepted into Stanford, where he is (4) going on a debate scholarship. Because Paul actually likes public speaking, and won a bid to the Tournament of Champions, this really big debate competition every year. If that's not enough, there is always (5) Paul actually speaks Mandrin. I sort of hate my cousin, Paul.