The Curse of Angeal Series

by Burning In The Dark

A series of crack drabbles. Pairing A/Z/G. I suck at summaries, look inside to find more.

Title: Curse of Angeal Series
Status: 1/10 (that are planned)

Type: Drabbles
Author: Burning In The Dark/XMiss-NoirX (DeviantArt)
Rating: M
Pairing: Angeal/Genesis, Angeal/Zack, Genesis/Zack

Setting: AU
Genre: Friendship/Humour/Romance
Warnings: Swearing, Transformations

Disclaimer: I Do NOT own Final Fantasy VII, it belongs to Square Enix.
Summary: A series of crack drabbles. Pairing A/Z/G. I suck at summaries, please read.

Curse of the Angealasaurus

"Every day you spend without a smile, is a lost day." ~Author Unknown

Angeal awoke to the sound of a glass smashing and a slamming door. Angeal raised his head from the pillow and looked around, making sure nothing was out of the ordinary; nothing was moved except for his sheets which he was currently sleeping in. Angeal groaned softly and rose out of bed, shuffling towards his favourite lover: his coffee machine. Angeal slowly lifted his hand to start the machine, and he suppressed another groan after he heard the familiar ding of it saying it was out of coffee beans.

Sighing, Angeal managed to find the last jar of coffee beans. He poured the whole thing into the machine and waited until his espresso was ready. He lifted the cup to his nose and smelt the fresh and oh so heavenly aroma of coffee tickling his smell receptors. He took a sip and felt the smooth taste of the espresso running down his throat.

Odd... it isn't doing its normal job at perking me up... Coffee was the one thing that could make him more alert in the mornings. Goddess knew he needed the strength, especially on the Easter weekend. He sighed once again as he turned on the hot water for his morning shower. After he finished scrubbing his hair and body, he stood under the shower for a few more minutes, letting the warm rivulets of water course down his bulky frame.

As Angeal lifted his head he saw out of the corner of his eye something pink slap itself on his forehead. Angeal sighed. I swear, I've done more sighing in the last twenty minutes I do when I'm in a meeting with Lazard. It wasn't that the Director of SOLDIER was an irritating man; far from it. He just had a tendency to get lost in tangents, and go on and on. Kind of like the white slacks he wore: there was no end in sight. As he positioned himself in front of the mirror to shave and investigate what the pink thing was, he happened upon his reflection in the mirror. Everything was normal aside from one significant change. Cotton Candy pink was the ONLY way to describe what had become of his beautiful black hair.

Angeal was seething; he had to find his reckless jokester puppy. Angeal left the confines of his bathroom, naked as the day he was born, intent on finding the hellion who changed his physical appearance. He reached for the doorknob, and as he turned the handle, he saw a note. Angeal only knew of one puppy with such terrible handwriting.

Angeal,

I hope you don't mind, I borrowed your PHS and your car. It's okay, well you said it was last night as Genesis had a mouthful of your...

Angeal's sight hazed over in red, eliminating the rest of the note. He didn't need to know who had signed it. Only Zack would have the audacity to sign his own death wish.

Angeal took a few calming breaths, and in between a clenched jaw, he managed a few words."Zackary Fair! You're so dead when I get my hands on you!" That was as good a war cry as the Commander would give. The note was torn to shreds, and it littered the air like potpourri as the naked and now pink haired man stalked to his door. He walked the ten meters down to Genesis's apartment, tripling his stride. He knew he should have grabbed some semblance of clothing, but since there was no one up at this hour, he figured the last thing he should be concerned about was indecent exposure. The secret knock that he and his long time lover had established was in threes; that number represented a lot of things in their lives. He inwardly seethed, but he calmed down a notch when he heard the sound of Genesis unlatching the door.

Within moments, Genesis swung open the door, and Angeal swore he could hear the filthy thoughts from his lovers mind. Genesis's eyes travelled down his body appreciatively, and he clicked his tongue against his teeth a few times.

"Oh Ange-Ange it's not my birthday... but I do enjoy seeing your naked body at my door at six AM in the morning, especially on the weekends." Genesis gripped Angeal's arm, and with a smirk, he threw Angeal into his apartment. Angeal landed on his backside and immediately stretched out one leg, and crossed one leg onto his thigh. He might have been in his birthday suit, but there was no law against looking slightly decent.

Genesis looked as happy as the cat that had successfully eaten an entire family of canaries. Everything about Angeal emanated masculinity, from the curve of his broad shoulders, to the muscles of his forearms. Add rock hard abs, thighs to make Hercules himself weep in envy, and the slight flush to his skin, and one had the components of a god. However, the only thing keeping him from taking in the lot of his lover was the fact that Angeal chose now of all times to have morals against exposing certain…parts of himself. If he walked the small distance outside of his apartment towards his own, bare-ass naked, why did he suddenly have fear of exposing himself?

Genesis just shrugged. Nothing was ever accomplished by silence. If he wanted Angeal to know of his intentions, he needed to say something. "Come here my cotton candy ball, I just want to lick you all over!" Genesis met Angeal's eyes once, and then leapt towards his lover. Angeal moved a little to the right, just enough so that Genesis would miss him. Genesis noted that he miscalculated, and he wound up landing on his forearms and his knees.

Angeal willed his blood to cool, for seeing his lover on his forearms and knees was almost too tempting to resist. Unfortunately I have more important issues to resolve at the moment... I can always keep my head cool until it comes to my rambunctious little puppy. Angeal focus left when he saw a pair of huge aquamarine oculars staring at him from a few centimetres away. He could feel Genesis's breath on his face, as well as the desire that his favourite red-head had no intention of hiding.

All Genesis wanted to do was connect their lips for a glorious meeting the angels would sing about and other such mushy nonsense. Angeal sighed and crab walked backwards away from his lover. As much as he would have loved to spend the morning tangled in those arms, and kissing him stupid, he had other matters to attend to. Such as... where Zack ran off too. The only reason he invaded Genesis's house while he was…indisposed, was to borrow his PHS. Since Zack took his, he needed to rely on Genesis to help him locate the puppy, his PHS…and his precious vehicle. I fear this will only end in disaster.

Since he dodged the kiss, the groping, as well as the hundreds of other "creative" things Genesis came up with, Angeal knew a reward was in order. Genesis was remarkably easy to reason with when a few lines of LOVELESS were recited. Angeal cleared his throat and began reciting "Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul, pride is lost wings stripped away, and the end is nigh..." Angeal watched a dream like quality come over Genesis's features, and he knew that if he was to ask for favours, now would be the ideal time. "Gen…I need to use your PHS. Please?"

Genesis was about ready to leap into Angeal's arms, for he really did love it when his love recited his favourite play. Then the last part of the sentence shattered through the LOVELESS façade. "Um... Ange... I know this might sound a bit…forthright, but why don't you use your own PHS?" Genesis felt a smirk line his mouth, for Angeal was so adorable when he forgot little details. He knew that a slight flush was tinting his cheeks, and he wondered what he looked like to his best friend and lover right that moment. I know he's a smart, generous, honourable and rather sexy hunk of meat... Genesis forgot about all notions of reality as his mind rambled on. Only Angeal's voice snapped him out of his complimentary train of thought

"You know our beloved puppy?" Angeal saw Genesis nod at his question. "Well, he stole my PHS, my car keys and left a note for me... and I need to use your PHS to find out where he is... please?" Angeal knew Genesis would say yes, but for the moment, he wanted to see what he could get away with doing. He blinked a few times, and he lowered his eyelids a few centimetres, his eyes taking on a lustrous quality. Angeal knew that Genesis had always found it hard to resist him, even if at times he ignored him for LOVELESS or a matter he found more important. In truth, Angeal knew he would drop everything and help him if he simply asked. He loved Genesis's unfaltering devotion towards him.

Angeal watched as Genesis languidly got up, stretched, and literally pranced over to where his PHS was sitting on his black suede lounge. Oddly enough, it was the only piece of furniture that he asked for help with choosing. The now pink haired Commander watched his lover walk over the the couch, reach over and retrieve the PHS, and bend down a few inches. Before he could admire the intricacies of such a well-toned ass however, Genesis turned around. Genesis walked over to him with deliberate grace, leaned down, and kissed him on the lips. Afterwards, with a smirk on his sensuous mouth, Genesis held the PHS out for him to take. There were always sweet rewards to kissing him.

Angeal gently took the PHS that was decorated in a red leather cover from Genesis and flipped open the device, revealing an…interesting wallpaper. Angeal squinted at the image, blinked, and then opened his mouth in horror. He was certain his face was bright red. I could've sworn I only had that picture on my phone... and I could've sworn Genesis took that for me when I was very drunk...However, there was no time to get aggravated about embarrassing pictures. He had a puppy to take to the pound.

The phone rang twice, and then a chipper voice resounded on the other line. "Genesis, how many times do you have to call asking me for more pictures, I told you already... the picture I sent you of Angeal in your naughty nurse outfit was the only picture he has on his PHS, and I am pretty sure he would kill me if he knew I sent it to everyone in his contact list!"

Angeal felt a smirk come to his lips. He was going to enjoy this. "Zack..." Angeal heard a gulp on the other end "Please tell me you didn't send that picture to everyone on there... including my mother... because then you are going to be severely punished." Angeal ran through a mental tabulation on all of the different ways he could get his point across to Zack. Taking his phone and car was one thing…but dyeing a man's hair pink would just not do!

"Of course not Angeal" Zack whined "Only the people you work with... and by the way you did say I could borrow your car last night. I wrote you a note!" As if a note would help matters!

Angeal sighed. The last thing he wanted was for Zack to get panicked and crash the car. "Zackary Fair... where are you?" He said this in a soft tone, not wanting to scare Zack. I did that once before and it was the worst thing ever... he broke three things in one of the meeting rooms and then I found him sobbing in a corner...I promised myself I'd never do that again.

"Ask Genesis... you forgot to charge your PHS and it's about to..." Angeal couldn't hear anymore from Zack, figuring his own PHS just died on Zack. Angeal shut the phone and pinched the space between his eyes. Fucking brilliant!

XXxXxXxXX

The first few minutes in the bathroom had been a bit of a hassle. Genesis managed to dye Angeal's hair back to its original shade –Materia had more than one use!-and afterwards, he turned, stretched, and stepped into the shower. Genesis expected for Angeal to join him soon afterwards.

Genesis sighed as the hot water released some of the metaphorical weight on his shoulders. Now if only I had someone to share this with... Genesis felt a smirk grace his exquisite features. He heard the hooks holding the shower curtain up squeak as Angeal pushed them back. Angeal stepped in behind him and closed the shower curtain. Analysing his current predicament Genesis realised he rather liked the position he was in, being in front of Angeal. Angeal was towards his back…and sometimes, there was nothing better than having your back turned. Angeal was only a hair's breadth away from him, and Genesis wished he would just move just a little more so their bodies could meld together.

Angeal snaked his hands around Genesis's waist, his fingertips splaying across the skin of his hips. Angeal felt Genesis shiver under his ghostly touches. He was trying to decide the best course of action when he felt Genesis lean into his touch, aligning their bodies perfectly. Genesis rested his head on Angeal's shoulder. He knew there was only one other way to get what he wanted from his lover, he had to do it.

Angeal's hands ghosted over Genesis's flat stomach, teasing him with his fingernails. The act made it feel as if Genesis's skin was on fire, and it was the ultimate state of bliss. The gift of the Goddess was Angeal's touch. Genesis held back a whimper, for he knew what Angeal was going to do next. Before Genesis could escape, Angeal grabbed a hold of his now throbbing appendage, all the while splashing water all around.

Genesis released an exhalation of breath, and after a moment, he smirked. He knew Angeal was enjoying himself, unless that was his "hairbrush" poking into his backside. "Hey Ange..." Genesis's voice was cut off and replaced with a breathless moan as Angeal grabbed the hard appendage and softly stroked it. He always had such a gentle touch. Genesis always loved it when they would shower together, though they never really came out clean and had to go back and have another. It was time well spent of course.

Angeal sighed and realised he would have to at least give his lover the release he oh so deserved. After the release Angeal felt Genesis slump lifelessly against him. Now was the time to ask, to ask for what he needed right this second. "Hey Genesis... can I borrow your bike?" Angeal asked this politely, and he looked down at his lovers tangled mass of red hair. He looked dishevelled, tired, and extremely sexy. Sometimes he swore he felt his heart skip a beat every time he looked at Genesis when he was a mess.

Genesis was relieved that Angeal didn't leave him hanging like last time. The man could be such a tease. If he did that to me again I would've thrown him out. Genesis was trying to register what Angeal had asked him, but with the way that Angeal's big hands ruffled his hair, it was hard to think in coherent thoughts. "I... um... don't remember where I left my keys, I think they're in my pile of plush toys..." Genesis trailed off, a slight pink hue staining his cheeks.

Genesis looked at Angeal, who was smirking for the millionth time that day. Even with that small effort of lips upturning, it looked amazing on him. He was awestruck by the man's body once more, and he ran his hands up his lover's chiselled abs. Somehow, he managed to shake off the stupefaction that always came after he stared at Angeal for too long. Genesis suppressed a sigh. He was always embarrassed to admit he was a hoarder and collected plush toys and other miscellaneous goods, just in case the next Apocalypse came, and innocent civilians needed comforting in the form of a loveable stuffed toy.

But for now, all he could think about was in pressing his pouting lips against Angeal's mouth. Showing up naked on his door-step made for a darned good Easter weekend.

XXxXxXxXX

Angeal sighed for what seemed like the ten-millionth time that day. He was now clean, dressed and headed towards the parking compound located underneath the apartment building. Angeal looked at the spot where his Jeep should've been in, and instead of seeing leather interior and the steel rims of the tires, all he saw was a small oil stain. Melancholy and worry overcame him, and he vowed then to never let the puppy take the car out again. I hope Zack hasn't ruined the paint job…

Angeal turned on his heel and walked over to where Genesis and his motorbike were, and where his favourite person was. He would never steal his car and PHS without asking. He looked to Genesis who was dressed in his favourite short red leather jacket. Angeal heard the squeaking of leather boots, and after a moment, he nearly collided with Genesis. That's what he got for admiring Genesis's toned legs in tight jeans.

Genesis sighed dramatically for a moment, and then spoke. "Oh my angel... I cannot take you to our young puppy. While you were taking your sweet time in my "Cavern of Fun" I got a call from Lazard. Guess who's going on a mission?" Angeal nodded and rubbed Genesis's back. Genesis was loyal to ShinRa, but he knew he wanted this weekend off. "But I can take you halfway to the ShinRa building... okay my angel?" Genesis stated. He watched as his angel sighed for the umpteenth time that day. Nothing seemed to be going right today.

"Also Ange, the next time you visit my "Cavern of Fun" please put the toys back where they came from" Genesis completed this plea with hand gestures "People think it's so odd when I have those sorts of toys lying about my apartment. I know it's a secret that you love plush toys, but seriously decorating my apartment with adorable toys... from my top secret closet of fun!" Genesis grinned, taking away the accusatory tone. It was a strange love, Angeal adoring the plush toys…but he dealt with it.

Angeal grunted an apology all the while rolling his eyes. He hopped on behind Genesis as he revved the engine, and he put his arms around his small waist. Genesis was always so warm, and he cherished this heat as it seeped through his best friend's clothing and into his arms and torso. Things were looking up. He would find Zack, his car, and all would be well. Genesis would be back in time to celebrate Easter, and life would go on.

However, Angeal swore if the puppy hadn't done much damage that he would have his way with his lover tonight. As soon as Angeal was starting to get used to Genesis's body heat, Genesis stopped the bike in front of the ShinRa compound.

"Okay my angel; it's time for you to go fetch our young puppy while I go on a mission." There was always a moment of dread when one of them were called off on a solitary mission. SOLDIER life was always trying, and sometimes, the recruits and high Commander's never made it home. Genesis sensed his mood and brushed his shoulder affectionately. "It will be fine. I promise my love" Genesis reassured while taking his helmet off. Angeal knew that Genesis was going to give him a quick embrace, and then take off. Before Angeal could blink Genesis had turned around and locked lips with him. He wasn't very comfortable with public affection, and he never would be. However, for the moment, he just cherished it, not caring who stared. They were all secretly jealous he figured that they didn't have a hot red head kissing them good-bye.

Angeal watched his lover speed off towards the outskirts of Midgar on his shiny red motorbike, his red leather jacket fluttering behind him like two crimson wings. Angeal waited until his lover was out of sight, and turned around, heading towards the building. I am going to have a serious talk with that little puppy... Angeal thought, though his main dilemma was what to say and how to say it. He pondered what to say to the rambunctious little puppy, when he, Angeal Hewley tripped on a rock.

Angeal raised an eyebrow as he felt his hand land in some water…some very warm water. His eyebrows narrowed when he saw something peculiar, something that was hardly EVER seen in Midgar and that colour. About ten meters away from him was a chocobo, a purple chocobo with blue feathers on top of the head. He swore it was the weirdest thing he has seen that day, except for Genesis's Cavern of Fun, a closet and trunk filled to the brim with teddy bears and other trinkets.

Angeal was flabbergasted when the strange coloured chocobo pecked him on the arm. He resisted the urge to let out a cry, or to reach forward and snap its neck out of frustration. He was an honourable man, and he would not let the murder of an animal be on his conscious. Tarnished pride was better than killing an innocent creature who knew no better. Angeal shooed the bird on its way while walking towards the ShinRa building. Angeal felt a headache coming on but ignored it; he was so close to the puppy he could feel his Zack senses going haywire. He walked through the main entrance and asked the receptionist if she had seen Zack Fair.

"Oh yes sir, he came in here about an hour ago... I think he's in the conference room with Director Lazard." Angeal knew what she was thinking... something along the lines that SOLDIERS keep irregular hours and sometimes work weekends, and how they were doing their civic duty to the community. He kindly thanked her and went to the lifts and pressed the button.

Angeal started absentmindedly rubbing the spot where the strange chocobo pecked him, and while he did that, he realised then that he was in civilian clothes. That was why the receptionist didn't call him by his title of Commander; it was because he looked like a regular civilian, one who was more than likely written off as Zack's boyfriend or something. Angeal had one of those 'I hate my life' moments; he would never say it aloud because it wouldn't be honourable, and Angeal was all about honour.

When the lift finally got to his floor he ran straight into Sephiroth. He greeted his long time friend "Hey Sephiroth... what're you doing here on a weekend?" Angeal politely asked. He knew Sephiroth was going out with some teenager, if he remembered correctly he was about eighteen or nineteen. He would have thought that he would have been taking the boy out for the holiday.

"Lazard called and said I had to pick up urgent papers that were of the utmost importance." Sephiroth shuffled the papers in his hands for emphasis. "Also, this was the weekend I was supposed to take Cloud back to see his mother for Easter... so I have to run..." Sephiroth turned in the opposite way, looking both a bit rushed, but happy. "Have a nice day Angeal! Oh and tell your puppy to stop eating chocobolate..." Sephiroth finished hurriedly and left the facility.

Angeal shook his head and suppressed a sigh, dreading getting into the Director's office. He knew chocobolate was a special kind of chocolate that was only available around Easter, because of how much chocolate and sugar was in the candied sweets. This could be potentially dangerous, depending on how much he's ingested. Angeal always hated to deal with Zack after chocolate, coffee and sometimes even after they had sex. He was always too hyper, and chocolate certainly didn't help Zack calm down. He heard the familiar ding of the elevator reaching its destination.

Angeal bolted out of the elevator and ran straight into the conference room. His worst fears were revealed when he got there. Zack was on the table, drinking coffee and eating chocobolate... and harassing the Director. Personally, Angeal was more worried about Zack than Lazard; Zackary Fair was like a puppy, in almost EVERY way. I'm still waiting for the day Zack lifts his leg up and urinates on a tree when we go for walks…

"Zackary Fair!" Angeal said in his booming voice "Get down from the meeting table this instant!" For a moment, he felt more like Zack's parent than his lover and mentor. Angeal watched Zack do a double take, and then jump off the table with fear in his eyes. He should have known that the puppy would have tried to make a getaway. It was what all the young ones did. Zack slid through his legs and ran off into the building, more than likely about to wreak some havoc with interns and other firsts. Angeal was tired of this charade, and all he really wanted was to apprehend the puppy and make his way back home to enjoy the Easter weekend. Angeal apologized to a very amused Lazard and resumed chasing after his pup. He caught sight of Zack inside of the elevator, going down towards the exit. Ever like a puppy to try and find a random doggy door to escape.

Angeal rushed for the stairs, knowing that even though he was on the sixty-fourth floor, he could still use his SOLDIER speed and catch/apprehend/punish Zack in the lobby. Angeal didn't even spare a glance at all the looks he was receiving as he was running down all of the flights of stairs. So much for untarnished pride... After several minutes of running, Angeal neared the end of the stairs. He paused for a moment to catch his breath, and then he saw Zack's head bob out from the elevator towards the exit sign. Angeal sprinted across the lobby, dodging a few civilians, interns, and perturbed looking thirds and seconds. This was no time to be subtle. He tackled Zack to the ground in the middle of the parking lot, just meters away from his car. The car looked fine, and with the bulge in Zack's pocket, his PHS seemed in prime condition as well.

"Zack... you have been a very bad puppy" Angeal breathlessly stated while lying on top of Zack for a few moments to regain his breath. "You know you're not allowed to have chocolate and especially not COFFEE." Looking down at his puppy he felt a little twinge of hurt at the saddened look on his student's features. But it had to be done, and the law had to be lain down.

"Oww... Angeal your claw is digging into me" Zack whined. Angeal blinked a few times, wondering what the hell he was talking about. Was this one of his dramatics, thinking that with the way he was squeezing his shirt…

Zack screamed when he looked at Angeal's 'hand' again, which elicited a startled expression from his mentor. For some unknown reason it had transformed into a three fingered scaly claw. He figured if he was afraid, Angeal must have been terrified out of his right mind. The claw looked very much real and alive, an appendage that was attached to his hand. Angeal was the type to constantly spiel about honour, dreams, and life-lessons…but he never joked around. This wasn't some deranged way to teach him to never mess with his things…this was actually happening! And if the terrified look on Angeal's face was any indication, the claw was very real.

"Umm Angeal... I really think I should take you to the doctors... or maybe the hospital." Zack gulped. What would they do to him there? Experiments…take scale samples?

He whimpered a little as Angeal released his arm. In the mayhem Angeal still insisted on driving, and Zack let him until both of Angeal's hands had become claws and seemed to be shrinking. This day just couldn't get any weirder! He was half tempted to cry out that he was sorry that he borrowed his PHS because he had been too lazy to charge his own, and borrow his car on deceit, but Zack knew that wouldn't do a bit of good. All he could hope for was that Angeal wasn't stuck like this permanently. They were on the main street of Midgar when Angeal's arms began shrinking, but regardless Zack managed to get Angeal to stop and pull over, which was when Zack realised Angeal's shoe was missing and his toenails were becoming claws, which had bits of his shoe on it. What the hell was happening to his mentor?

Angeal had always known how to deal with pain, and this time was no different. His discomfort was underneath a mask of his own devising, as well as the budding panic in his chest. What was happening to him? Was this some terrible side-effect from the Jenova cells? The Mako? What was it…the chocobo? The stupid, violet chocobo with the blue feathers on the top of its head…that might have been it! All of this started after he was pecked in the arm! The stimulation from the adrenaline must have hit my blood stream, causing this…side effect. He noticed people walking by were starting to take a look at his strangeness. Zack looked up at him, and Angeal's heart softened. It was the look Zack gave him when he had too much caffeine and sugar, and all he wanted was to be held by him.

Some people on the side of the road began to give him strange looks. Mothers ushered their children away, and some men just gawked at them with their jaws open, unabashed at showing such obvious revulsion and fascination for his…condition. And why shouldn't they be? He was a man with small scaled arms with claws and little to no shoes on account of the claws coming out of them!

All of a sudden, Angeal felt scales erupt all over his skin, and his face began to grow larger by the minute. Oh dear Shiva, what next? He crossed his eyes and looked at his nose which was growing longer and broader, with scales on it; his arms were getting closer to his body, which was a strange feeling on its own. If this was the end…he wanted to comfort his student and pup one final time. He looked to his puppy and asked for a hug, and for a moment, pure fear flashed in Zack's eyes. After that second of hesitation however, Zack launched himself into his arms, gripping him fiercely. He was rambling on and on about how sorry he was, and that even if it took him his entire life, he would find a cure for what was happening to him. Angeal tried to reply and say that wouldn't be necessary when he heard ripping sounds…well now, his clothing was gone too. What else could possibly go wrong?

He wanted to hug his puppy a little while longer but he felt Zack separate himself, and then…he shrunk! Wait…either Zack was shrinking…or he was growing! He looked down and saw a crowd standing around him, the women with the children, and the men who were now staring at him with wide, wondering eyes. It wasn't every day a Commander turned into a…well, whatever he was! Angeal opened his mouth to lick his lips, and when he did so, his tongue caught on a very sharp tooth. Blood flowed down his throat, and he decided to very, very delicately check his other teeth. They were all as sharp as freshly sharpened knives. What was he now? A…monster? Angeal was panicking more and more each minute.

When Angeal went to ask Zack what his face looked like all that came out was a screeching sound, kind of like a roar he heard before on a television show Zack was watching. Excellent so now I can't talk. I obviously look too different to be identified as human, much less myself. Angeal sighed, or breathed or whatever it was his new body did.

Zack was staring up at Angeal with his jaw down to the sidewalk. Angeal now was about twelve feet tall, covered in scales and had odd hands, and attracting a lot of attention. Angeal's nose was turned into a snout, and he had a mouthful of jagged teeth that looked deadly, which was the oddest thing that Zack had seen thus far. Or so he had thought. Angeal turned around and there was a small tail which was getting bigger and bigger every second.

He didn't need to know how Angeal was feeling at that moment, but he saw in his eyes that there was worry and fear, which scared him. Zack knew that Angeal was becoming something called a tyrannosaurus rex, because of the television show he had watched while enjoying his sixth cup of coffee.

Good thing he's on my side…I saw how that T-Rex took out Tokyo!

XXxXxXxXX

Genesis, for the lack of a better word, was bored out of his mind. He had finished the mission in double time, and all he wanted was to go back to his apartment, snuggle next to Angeal, and think up ways to put Zack in his place. However, the Turks had other ideas, as always. He reluctantly, followed Reno and Rude back to what he safely assumed were the bases in the area. He knew Reno; he always made jokes and never took anything seriously and had very bright red hair. He was currently sitting in a room, with the television on absentmindedly flicking through the channels. All Genesis wanted was to go home and watch his own damn TV.

Just as he was about to give up on finding anything to watch, while waiting for the guys to come back from getting their coffees Reno found something. A news report flashed on the screen about a tyrannosaurus rex terrorising Midgar... the monster was said to be about thirty feet tall, with a massive tail. The cameras flashed and they showed the "monster" as well as...a very small and attractive male…the pup! Zack was right next to the dinosaur! Zack was never one to run from a fight, but Genesis couldn't recall the time when Zack would purposely stick around with a Bahamut, just for kicks. The monster he knew was known instead as a Mr. Angeal Hewley. Sometime in the past hour, Angeal had become a dinosaur! How did Zack not realise this?

Genesis's mouth opened wide and he turned the volume up as loud as it could go. The reporter began talking, a nerdy man with a red bow-tie. "…Now we don't know if the aggravated dinosaur is male or female but maybe the young man near it would know." The news reporter stated and Genesis moved closer to the television as the camera man got closer to Zack. "Young man I have a question for you... why don't you want us to shoot this dinosaur? It's terrorising Midgar! It is destroying things with its huge tail!"

Zack looked straight at the camera, his unnatural mako blue eyes shining with both vehemence and unshed tears. "This dinosaur is my best friend!" Genesis was touched at how much Zack loved Angeal, but laughed at the shocked expression on the reporters face. That was Zack for you, always causing a scene and a stir wherever he went.

The reporter shook his head and cleared his throat a few times before continuing. "Well... we still don't know if this beast is male or female... but by this young man here... I am guessing it's female..." The reporter trailed off as the dinosaur stood above the reporter and was looking straight up. The reporters eyes went wide, and his face flushed. Genesis snickered, knowing that what the reporter was seeing was something that many a female-and male-would pay millions of Gil to see. "Well everyone... after getting a good look at this beast... it seems it's a male..."

"He's no monster or beast! The dinosaurs name is Angeal! I will call him Angealasaurus!" Zack growled at some of the female reporters with the microphones, and he got closer to Angeal's leg, gripping one of the huge claws there. Genesis nearly doubled over laughing. There was one for the science books folks…not a Megalosaurus…but an Angealasaurus!

"I think Angela is a better name..." he muttered under his breath. Genesis watched as the reporter with the red bow-tie suddenly got eaten in mid sentence. Angeal ate him in three quick gulps, and after that, he gave a mighty roar. Genesis started and stood up, knowing there wasn't a moment to lose.

Genesis had made his decision and decided to get to his love straight away. Angeal would feel terrible once he came to and realized he ate someone! If Angeal could save his life multiple times in combat, he most certainly could save him from…well, the Curse of the Angealsaurus! He left the room and went for the helicopter pad. He saw Reno and Rude sitting drinking coffee, as he suspected. Well, if they were going to keep him waiting on his damn holiday…then he was going to take something of theirs!

Genesis skilfully snuck past them, and jumped into the helicopter. I'm so glad I took those helicopter lessons Zack got me for Christmas. Genesis, being the man that he was, had to say one final thing to Rude and Reno, who now where outside near the chopper, running towards him with their arms waving. That's what you get for keeping me waiting gentlemen…and not offering me some coffee!

"Toodle-oo gentlemen... see you next time!" Genesis yelled over the roar of the chopper and lifted off before either of the Turks could get him. 'I have to get to my beloved'! Was the prioritised thought in Genesis's head, he had to help Angeal... in any way possible!

XXxXxXxXX

Zack could honestly say one thing: he was at a complete loss. The past half an hour was spent trying to keep more reporters being either eaten, trampled, as well as being wary of those same dangers. He knew that Angeal loved him, but in this…dinosaur form, he wasn't sure how mentally competent he was. The instinct to killeatravagedestroy was more than likely on Angeal's mind more than making sure he didn't cause damage to the city. Zack was used to been thrown around, but not by the press and trying to avoid a gigantic dinosaur!

Zack felt his pocket vibrate, and then his ring tone 'Fever' by Adam Lambert blasted from his PHS. He answered with a smile, knowing exactly who it was. "Hello Zack Fair authorised Angealasaurus keeper speaking. To ask about our rides press one. To get information about how to get your own Angealasaurus press two..." Zack was cut off by a very loud and annoyed friend.

"Oh... what kind of rides do you offer?" Genesis asked. He was mildly curious with the ministrations.

"Well there is the Angealasaurus 'Slip 'N Slide', Dino-Ferris Wheel..." Zack was cut off again by his lovely red-headed lover.

"No I meant like... sexual things... can I do sexual things to Angeal in dinosaur form?" Genesis practically whispered.

"Well... I guess you could give Angeal a blowjob but you would barely lick one part of him... and would you even be able to swallow that much? His come would probably weigh as much as you! You could let him give you a blowjob... however I am afraid it may include; amazingly huge tongues and loss of genitals. Now for sex he may rip you in half... and you may not feel anything if you try to penetrate him..." Zack trailed off and waited for Genesis to speak again.

"Zack this is no time for messing around! I know you know that our lover has been turned into a 30 foot gigantic dinosaur…"Genesis paused suddenly, and then resumed speaking "Oh wait, I forget…you're a little boy with no brain!" His tone was entirely playful however. Zack knew it was only said to get on his nerves, and spill information quicker, but Zack also knew how to get on Genesis's nerves in a totally different way.

"Listen baby, while I am keeping track of our gigantic lover, you're doing goddess knows what... I can have his humongous body parts all to myself if you don't hurry." Zack laughed and hung up. I love baiting him... it's always fun... I wonder how Angeal is going to react... he never liked me baiting Genesis... Zack threw his head back in laugher, all the while stepping onto Angeal's giant reptilian foot.

Angeal felt a little person get on his foot, and as he leaned forward to see he realised it was just the puppy, and continued on his way. Angeal was used to stomping around the ShinRa building but stomping around the streets of Midgar, at thirty feet tall was something different entirely especially considering he was causing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of damages.

Angeal's mind couldn't register higher thoughts then that, but he knew he would never get used to having a tail; it swung from side to side hitting the buildings... I'm freaking out because I can't control my tail and NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND DINOSAUR... except maybe another dinosaur but then who would understand him? Angeal was battling his own brain in an argument of logics.

Zack was worried when he felt the foot he was currently holding onto crash into the ground harder than before sending pieces of the pavement flying all around them, the tail thrashing into a nearby flower stand. Zack smiled very softly at the happy faces of people getting free flowers on the surface... even if the girl the tail hit was badly hurt. Even still, Zack couldn't leave Angeal out of his site for a few seconds in case he lost him.

Zack laughed at the thought of losing a thirty foot dinosaur in Midgar... it was close to impossible, but after all it was Angeal. The man was known for his notion of taking the impossible, and making it reality. Zack saw multiple helicopters above head and most of them were news choppers... except for one, which was a Turk chopper, which just landed on the helicopter pad atop the ShinRa building. Conveniently Angeal was headed that way.

Genesis watched as his lover slowly made his way towards him, though it was painfully slow. Genesis's smile grew as Angeal's colossal head was inches from the building and he jumped onto it, he landed in-between the nostrils and his feet dangling dangerously close to Angeal's mouth. Though I do like biting, that wouldn't be kinky... Genesis quickly grabbed onto the outside of a nostril as Angeal reared his head up and opened his jaws, trying to make Genesis fall in.

"NO! Bad Dino-Geal... I may look delicious and absolutely delectable but I am not to be eaten like some common piece of meat! Bad Angeal" Genesis said gripping the nostril tighter. "I love you so I am going to say this... who have you been eating recently? Because I don't plan to kiss you with such foul smelling breath..." Genesis couldn't speak as Angeal turned around and made major damage on the Shin-Ra building.

Zack watched as Genesis hung on for dear life, also as a very expensive helicopter just plummeted to the ground. "Genesis I don't think we're going to be able to get that many breath mints... can you just control him or something? I'm sick of feeling so short next to him!" Zack yelled to Genesis. I don't care what his plan is... as long as we can get Angeal back to human form and get him away from Midgar for a while so people can enjoy their Easter.

Zack watched from below as Genesis swung his arm over and grabbed the other nostril and hung from them and lowered himself down near the mouth of the beast and ever so lightly kissed it. Zack was looking up at Genesis speechlessly That ass... complaining about Angeal having bad breath... just because he ate a channel six reporter... though they are rather disgusting. What does he think this is Beauty and the Beast? Zack thought with a snort.

Genesis felt Angeal's head get smaller until it was its normal size on top of a gigantic body... at least now he had a neck for Genesis to cling to. He never told Angeal but he had a fear of heights when he wasn't in a helicopter or other machinery. Genesis scrunched his eyes up and held onto Angeal's neck for dear life. About three minutes later there was a normal, very naked, Angeal standing there with Genesis in his arms like a child and Zack wrapped around one of his meaty and quite hairy legs.

Zack smirked and stood up and waited for Genesis to say something.

"While this all romantic and such I believe you can put me down now beloved..." Genesis advised lovingly. When Angeal put him down, Genesis looked up and down at Angeal and smirked. "Oh Ange my love... fully naked in front of me again, it's like you just want me to molest you in public!" Genesis boasted.

Angeal was sneering; Zack and Genesis decided it was best to get Angeal out of there immediately before another reporter went mysteriously missing. The car started, Angeal was wrapped up in a blanket in the backseat, and the road for home was paved.

When they finally got back to Genesis's apartment and Angeal was properly dressed they exchanged Easter gifts. Genesis cuddled up to Angeal, for it was conveniently his night with him.

Angeal smirked, something he almost never did but it seemed to suit him. Smiling seemed to suit him these days, and even after this bizarre situation, he found he could still smile. Angeal stood up and went to leave until Genesis got up and grabbed his hand.

"My Angel... it's our night... why are you leaving?" Genesis asked.

"Because my love" Angeal started cupping Genesis's smaller hand in both of his big ones. "I think it would be more beneficial for you to spend more time with our little puppy..." Angeal commented with a genuine smile gracing his handsome features. Angeal's smile grew and Genesis was about to retort. "Ah excellent to know you agree... I hope you two have a nice night and day tomorrow together... and bond more." Angeal said leaving the apartment.

"Hey Genesis... what's this funky blue stuff?" Zack asked after Angeal left, sticking his finger in it…

To Be Continued…

A/N; I want to thank my AMAZING beta LunaRainGlimmer for beta'ing this for me... now anyways I do plan to do a follow up crack fic to this :D I will put it up soon but until then I have other things to work on. HAPPY EASTER! I also hope I made you smile at least once, because smiling is good for the soul. I appreciate reviews :) *hint, hint. Nudge, Nudge* Please review? =3

Now this all has a soundtrack... well I wrote it to the songs; Faggot – Mindless Self Indulgence, Vanilla Twilight – Owl City and Devils Trill – Vanessa Mae (amazing). I hope you enjoyed this and will REVIEW it =D I can't wait to write the next chapter honestly! Oh I also have a DeviantArt account please follow me! XMiss-NoirX (:

In the next story; what is the mysterious blue stuff that Zack was playing with... and how did it end up all over Angeal? Well that shall be answered... along with some more torturing Angeal...!

I hope no one took this SERIOUSLY... it was PURE HUMOR and written under the hope I would make people laugh! So please do not take this seriously it was written for fun and humour.

Have a nice day!

The Black Demon Violin (The Silent Black Violin is my other account).

LunaRainGlimmer: hey there, Happy Easter everyone! This is the first instalment of a crazy series of a "Curse" saga in which we put AGZ through everything under the sun. It's my personal brand of fandom crack and insanity, all the by-product of long FB rants with Violin, as well as a longing to bring silly plots to this website. When you go crack, you NEVER go back. *winks*