az: My hands slipped...

"I guess you must have no boyfriend... because doctors were so busy..."

If she could be thoroughly honest with herself, it wasn't that she didn't like Captain Yoo Sijin. But it was more to her being afraid. Afraid to believe that such a great man could have sincerely fallen in love with her. Afraid that it could just be an illusion. A game.

She really didn't want to delude herself. While she didn't think she was unattractive—she could make herself pretty enough if she wanted to—her looks never did help her much at the hospital. Whether it's about her professorship application... or the incident with the Chairman, her looks never did her anything good. So when a charming, handsome... almost perfect man started to come to her direction, certainly it would seemed too much like a dream coming true.

And like a dream, it could so easily be taken away from her. Like a rug from under her feet... if someone would snatch it away without her noticing; she could easily fall down into the abyss. She have had enough misfortune to last a lifetime, she did not want to be served another unaware.

Of course, to imagine that someone like Captain Yoo would do something like that... was hard to believe. But there was still that possibility existing. And it didn't help that Captain Yoo had too much secrets that he couldn't reveal; always hiding behind his careless words and light-hearted banter. In which she could never tell if he was being serious or joking.

It only added to her fears.

Because even if Yoo Sijin was being earnest about his feelings for her, she couldn't believe that someone like him could really fall in love with her. They didn't really know each other that long... yet from the very beginning, Yoo Sijin had approached her very strongly. How could he do that? Even worse to even go as far as risking his own life, his own career for her?

It was a bit scary.

"Should I apologise... or confess?"

It scared her. Was she even so great a woman to be worthy of this awesome, charming man? Unlike Yoo Sijin, she couldn't be so confident that she could be that kind of woman. She didn't think she was that strong.

Yet she had to admit, she couldn't deny that she liked him a lot. That even the mere sight of him could comfort her heart. Making her regain the hope that everything could be fine again. But still... a part of her was hesitant. What if... loving her would lead this man that charmed her heart towards his death? She had seen first-hand what Yoo Sijin was capable of. She remembered the recording of him and Master Sergeant Seo overcoming several thugs so easily. She remembered the stand-off between him and his men... with the Arab bodyguards. She knew the length he could go to fulfilling his given orders. She had seen a brief glimpse of how far he could go to complete his mission. And that man didn't seem to feel pain like normal people do.

What if his feelings for her... becomes a weakness that could endanger his life?

xxx

It annoyed her. She might as well even go as far as admitting that she was angry. Why must Yoo Sijin be a soldier? Why must he be so selfless? And why was... she still hesitating? She should just get it over with and confess herself. It was clear as day how she felt for him. And she almost lost him once and that made her regretful over the things she left unsaid.

But looking at the bandaged form before her and seeing all the scars and old wounds on Sijin's body caused her to hold her words back again.

She was still afraid.