Dispelling Old Ghosts

by

Sabrina Lonewalker

Kermit Griffin sat at his desk at the 101st precinct that summer morning and stared at his computer screen, but he wasn't seeing the blinking cursor or the figures that filled the computer monitor in front of him. Instead, he was locked in a nightmare of his own, he was back in 'Nam, reliving the firefight that had cost him so much. Comrades had been lost and the fight had left him with singed corneas, the real reason for the green-tinted sunglasses that he habitually wore. He knew that if hadn't been for Blaisdell and Blake, he would have died that day.

When he finally noticed the voice speaking to him, he turned and saw that it was his friend and partner, Peter Caine. Peter looked worried.

"Earth to Kermit, you ok? Hey, Kermit, are you in there?"

Kermit blinked and was suddenly back and aware of his surroundings. He looked up at Peter and nodded.

"I'm ok. Just some old ghosts that have never totally gone away. What do you need?" He asked in his usual businesslike voice, Peter could hear the faint tremor there, but said nothing about it. Instead, he opened the case file and proceeded to tell the 101st information expert just how his unique skills were to be utilized this time and the two detectives were soon at work.

Later that night, Kermit had gone walking and soon found himself in Chinatown, standing in front of the building where Peter's father lived. Kermit had been here about seven months ago, when his sister Marilyn had had problems after moving into her new home in Brazelton. That time, Caine had saved her, not only from the ghosts roaming the house, but also from the very real human vermin who had tried to harm her and the kids.

He shuddered involuntarily, remembering going down that hallway, gun drawn, as he had tried to follow her and her captor. He remembered the voices, and the hands that had literally reached out from the walls to grab at him, as though they were trying to rip his very soul from him. He had never been so frightened in his life, not even in 'Nam. He knew that somehow the nightmares had to end or he was going to go insane, although some people said he already was.

When he entered the building, an overwhelming sense of peace and well-being filled him, like nothing he had ever felt before, but he knew that when he left, it would go away, it always did. Then, he heard a voice.

"Kermit, it is good to see you again. How may I help you this time?" It was the quiet yet powerful voice of Kwai Chang Caine, Peter's father. Kermit turned and removed the sunglasses, breaking one of his long standing rules, but this time, Caine was no adversary.

The priest was suprised by the pain and despair in the mercenary-cop's eyes and knew it only mirrored what what in the man's soul.

"Please, sit down, Kermit, and tell me why you are here." He gestured to the chairs on the terrace and Kermit sank into one with a groan, his face in his hands.

"I'm not exactly sure why I'm here, Caine, but I seem to have developed a knack for turning to you or even Peter lately, but Peter can't help me this time. I am hoping that you can, though."

Caine looked down at his son's friend and partner.

"If I can, of course I will. Now, tell me what is in your mind and heart, my friend."

Kermit heaved a deep sigh and soon, it all spilled out. The firefight in 'Nam, the deaths, the nightmares and the daydreams. He told Caine about the dungeon where he had been held a prisoner of war. He then told the shaolin priest things that he had never told anyone, not even Blaisdell. Tears were spilling down his face as he finished. Kermit was embarrassed, he had never cried in front of anyone, not even Marilyn. He hadn't cried when his brother, David had been killed, at least, not in front of anyone, he hadn't and now, here he was, crying in front of Peter's father. Caine said nothing, just reached out and laid his hand on Kermit's arm, his own empathy showing as tears spilled down his own cheeks at what this proud and honorable man had had to endure.

Finally, Kermit went silent, his emotions spent as he dried his tears with the back of his hand, the gesture reminding Caine of Peter as a small boy back at the temple, talking about Peter's mother, Laura, who had died when Peter was only two years old.

FLASHBACK SCENE-

"My son," Caine had said to the young lad who was sitting next to the koi pond, staring unseeingly into the water, tears spilling down his face. "Why do you weep?" Peter had looked up at his father, his strength there but silent.

"I was thinking about Mom and how little I really know about her. I wish I could have known more about her. I love her, but sometimes, it's like she's a stranger to me. All I can think about is what I have lost with her death, all of the things we will never do together." Peter wiped his tears with the back of his hand as his father sat down beside him, his arm encircling Peter's shoulders and drawing his son against him in comfort and companionship. Peter leaned into him, drawing strength from the love he felt.

"I know, my son. I miss her also. We could have had so much together as a family and it pains me to think of what we will never have. But you and I have each other, and together, we will keep her memory alive. I will tell you all that I can about her so that you will know her better." Peter managed a weak smile and looked up at his father.

"I hope so, Father. I love you."

"And I you, my son, more that you could ever know."

END FLASHBACK-

Caine looked back at Kermit, who was beginning to look more like his usual self, and smiled. The dour mercenary looked a lot calmer that he had when he had first entered the building. He even managed a faint, but noticable smile.

"I never thought I would tell anyone what I have just told you, Caine." Then, Kermit looked nervous and looked back at the priest. "I don't open up to people very well, I never have. You...You won't tell anyone else about...?" His voice trailed off uncertainly but Caine looked shocked at the very idea and Kermit felt better.

"Of course not. What you have told me stays here. I would never betray you or your trust, my friend." Kermit smiled again, hearing the term 'friend' applied to him. Caine continued.

"Sometimes, my friend, all that we need is for someone else to listen to us, and then the ghosts are dispelled and they go away. All though the nightmares do not immediately go away, they do lose their hold and diminish over time. All that you have experienced will always be a part of you, that can never change, but the fear and anguish can be moderated and dealt with. You will be fine. One other thing. You have closed yourself and your heart to emotions like love and companionship, for fear of being hurt. That is not good. Be cautious, yes, but if you cease to love, you cease to live. I will be here should you wish to talk again."

Kermit put his sunglasses back on and rose to his feet, sticking out his hand, only to be embraced and held as Caine would hold Peter. Kermit stiffined at first, instinctively recoiling from the physical contact, but then relaxed as he sensed no danger, just the affection Caine had for him as his son's friend, and his own.

As Kermit left the building and walked out into the warm summer night, he stopped and let out a deep breath. This time, he knew this sense of peace and well-being would go with him and stay with him. He knew that Caine was right and that the nightmares would go away over time. He knew now that he was going to be all right and not end up like other old mercenaries he knew about who had ended up miserable and alone.

He thought back, as he walked, about the time when Caine had been kidnapped and taken to the Dalai Lama. Peter had come to him for help and Kermit had promised him that he would not be alone. Now, Kermit knew what it meant to not be alone. He had Marilyn and her children, Paul and Annie and their children, and now, he had Peter and his father. He was not alone any longer and the ghosts were gone.

He headed back toward the precinct to get back to work on that case Peter had brought to him. He looked forward to cracking that code they had intercepted and his old, predatory smile returned as he was already beginning to unravel the puzzle in his mind. He whistled as he walked and anyone who knew him would have been very worried, for Kermit whistling only boded ill for those he was pursuing.

THE END