Darkwing Duck: The Webfoot Chronicles V
"It Came From Outer Space"

Act I

"Ooh! Go, Darkwing! Hooray! Clobber that guy! ...Aw, he missed! Okay, go for him with your right! Go, go, go-- missed again!" cried Beth as she intently watched Darkwing on the news.

"Those space Slime Monsters are slippery," said Gosalyn, sitting next to her on the couch and hogging the popcorn.

"I oughta be there with him," said Launchpad anxiously, sitting on the other side of Beth. "I mean, he's only a couple'a blocks away. I could get there in about five minutes-"

"No, Launchpad, you're still a little sick! You need to get rest, even if it is just a little cold. Besides, Drake looks like he's doing fine!" said Beth. She kept her eyes on the TV, admiring the way Darkwing leapt about, cape flowing behind him. "Sidekicks don't always have to be there. He seems to be doing a good enough job on his own of battling this alien invasion."

"Beth-- it's not an invasion unless there's more than one of them. And there's only one out there," said Gosalyn, the resident know-it- all about aliens.

"Oh... sor-RY," said Beth sarcastically, rolling her eyes. There was a time, just a few weeks ago in fact, when she most likely would never have had the nerve to speak to anyone that way, not even a friend. However, the introduction of Gosalyn, Launchpad, and of course, Darkwing Duck, to her life had helped her self-confidence quite a bit. Although she was still shy, she could at least relax around her friends. Of course, she only had three real friends, but...

"It's GOT him!" yelled Beth suddenly, watching as the slimey green alien oozed its way over Darkwing's body. "Gimme the popcorn," she said, and grabbed the bowl from Gosalyn. Gosalyn was obviously pretty worried, because she gave it up without a fight. Beth, too, was much more worried than she let on to be. After all, if anything happened to Darkwing-- she didn't even want to think about it. She'd loved him since she met him, and even if he didn't return the emotion, well-- Beth's life would be empty without Drake Mallard in it. End of story.

Launchpad, in a panic, was half out the door to try to save Darkwing when suddenly Gosalyn shouted, "Hey, look! It's leaving him!" Sure enough, the slime was rapidly creeping off of Darkwing's person, leaving him intact (although a little icky). The television camera trained on the ooze as, before anyone could stop it, it ran through a drainage pipe into the sewers and was gone.

Wild cheering broke out, both onscreen and at the Mallard residence.

"Hah! Take that, you alien scum!" shouted Gosalyn.

"Wow, he's such a... HERO," said Beth softly.

Launchpad agreed- after all, he was often impressed by Darkwing. But Beth was wearing her heart on her sleeve, as usual. There were days when he could stand the fact that the feelings he had for her were unrequited- in fact, those days were much more frequent than days like today, when suddenly, it all seemed like too much.

Almost in answer to his thoughts, Beth stood up and put her hand to Launchpad's forehead. "You feel okay right now?" He didn't bother to tell her that he had been feeling mostly normal all day long, and hadn't had a fever at any time. Instead he just grinned and nodded. "Good. I'll get you some more juice. Hey, while I'm at it, I'll make lunch, how's that sound?" she asked, and took her hand from Launchpad's forehead. He was a little disappointed.

"Not fruit salad?" whined Gosalyn. Beth just kept making the same thing, over and over, and even though she put cottage cheese in the salad sometimes it still got boring.

"Yes, fruit salad. Drake LIKES the way I make fruit salad," said Beth, and sighed happily.

"I like it too," said Launchpad quietly as Beth left the room. It meant very little, really, but... Was it really fair that she was so intensely concentrated on Drake?

"Still like her?" asked Gosalyn softly. Launchpad nodded his head rather morosely. "Don't worry, Launchpad. She's gotta come around sometime."

"Come on, Gos. If she goes for a guy like DW, what would she ever see in a guy like me?" he said.

Gosalyn looked at him sympathetically. She wasn't great with pep talks, although she wanted to make Launchpad feel better. The only think she could think to say was, "Well, there are other girls. You don't need to focus on just one."

He sighed and shook his head. "There are no other girls-- not like Beth. Not anymore. You just don't understand yet."

"Whatever," said Gosalyn. He was starting to depress her, which was rare for Launchpad. He sighed and sat down, waiting for Darkwing to come home.

"Whew," said Darkwing as he came in the front door about fifteen minutes later, "am I beat! I didn't get nearly enough sleep last night-- I wouldn't be up now at all, if not for that space 'Monster'- so called."

"Way to go, Dad! What was it like? Did it smell weird? Were you scared?" said Gosalyn, running up to him and giving him a big hug.

"Nah! There was never even a doubt that I would be victorious!" he said as he returned the hug.

"Wow, great job, DW! What didja do to scare it off like that?" said Launchpad.

"Well, nothing any other Defender of St. Canard wouldn't have done..."

"You don't know, huh?" said Gosalyn, grinning. Darkwing went on the defensive immediately.

"Hey, hey, hey-- just because I don't know what I did doesn't mean I didn't do it! I mean, I AM the Terror That Flaps in the Night, you know!" he sniffed.

"Hi, Drake," said Beth, coming in from the kitchen. "I saw you on the news... you did great."

"Yeah, thanks," said Darkwing absently. "So, did you fix that fruit salad again today?" She nodded happily. He was on his way into the kitchen when the transporter chairs whirled around and Drake Mallard made his entrance.

"What the-- just who do you think you are?" said both ducks at once. "I'm Darkwing Duck!" answered Darkwing.

"I think not. I am Darkwing Duck!" said Drake.

Gosalyn, Launchpad, and Beth all stared, too baffled to act. "This is WEIRD," whispered Launchpad.

"No kidding," returned Gosalyn. Beth said nothing, but she looked as stunned as the others.

"Hah! You proved you're not me! I would never reveal my secret identity to someone I didn't know!" said Darkwing, pointing a finger at him.

"How stupid do you think I am? If you're here, dressed in my costume, then you must already know my secret identity-- so it's okay for me to talk about it. Besides, you're a fine one to talk-- how'd you get here?"

Angrily, Darkwing said, "How do you think? I came in through the... door." He trailed off, realizing what a dumb thing he'd done. The house had been closer than the tower, and just taking the ten- minute walk from the scene of the fight had seemed like a natural idea at the TIME...

"Ah-HAH!" said Drake. He looked smug. "Since when would a careful superhero walk right in the front door, in costume?" said the other one, taking hold of Darkwing's finger and moving it aside.

"Ooops... heh heh... well, yeah, I must have, ah, overlooked that," said Darkwing.

Gosalyn groaned and put her face in her hands. Only Dad would be THAT dumb.

"I don't know who you are, but you can't get away with impersonating me!" said Drake, furiously eyeing Darkwing as he sputtered helplessly. "Waaaaaiit a minute-- I wonder if-- of course! You're that slime monster from earlier, aren't you?"

"What? Me? No, I'm..."

"Yeah, it all makes perfect sense now! Somehow, you must have absorbed my memories and shape! THAT'S why you left so quickly!" said Drake.

"NO!" said Darkwing. Launchpad, Gosalyn, and Beth, unsure of what to think, stood around the pair and watched silently. Beth, seeing how sure and in-control Drake seemed, was pretty certain that he was the real thing. Launchpad was clueless- they both looked pretty convincing.

"Quiet, you!" said Drake to his alter ego.

"Hey, Drake!" said Beth. Both ducks turned to look at her. Hoping to win Drake's favor, she said, "Let's get a rope and tie the impostor up!"

"Wait a minute! Beth! I am not an imp--" He was cut off as she looped the cord to a vacuum cleaner around his beak, shutting his mouth in mid-sentence. Launchpad decided that Beth was smart enough to figure out which DW was which. He trusted her, and went along with what she did. Together the two of them tied Darkwing up tightly.

"Er... NOW what do we do with it?" asked Launchpad as things settled.

"Oh, leave that to me. I'll deal with him. Not so tough now that you're bound and gagged, are you?" he said to the struggling form of Darkwing Duck - rather cruelly, Gosalyn noticed. He smiled at his prototype coldly, then looked up at Gosalyn. As he focused on his daughter, his expression changed quickly and he smiled warmly. She noticed the switch anyway. "So, Gos, do I get a 'Welcome back, thanks for defeating the alien twice' hug?" he asked, extending his arms to her.

"Uh... no thanks, Pop, I think I'm coming down with Launchpad's cold," said Gosalyn, backing away from him. Drake's eyes narrowed a little, and a small red pinpoint blinked in the centers for a second, and then extinguished. Was she the only one who noticed? Drake's smile began to look more forced. Gosalyn gulped and took a step backwards.

"Uh... Welcome back. Thanks for defeating the alien twice," said Beth shyly, behind him. She worked up all of her nerve, telling herself that it was okay for her to do this, and quickly put her shaking arms around his shoulders from behind. Drake froze in surprise, then relaxed. To her surprise and utter joy, he put his hands over hers and hugged her back as well as he could from that angle. Then he pressed his cheek to hers. She melted, giving out an almost inaudible sigh of contentment, and her eyes drifted shut. Launchpad watched for a moment and then sighed and turned away. Drake noted this and smiled a little. Behind him, Gosalyn watched them both with a bad feeling in her stomach. Darkwing, tied up and lying on the floor, started wriggling around and trying to say something. All of this happened in about five seconds, and then Drake let go of Beth and she looked about ready to faint from happiness.

"Dad...," Gosalyn whispered, looking at Darkwing. He looked up and made eye contact with her. Then he tried to smile, but the gag twisted it. Gosalyn smiled back. 'I'll save you, Dad,' she promised silently. She was positive that this Darkwing was the real one- the other one was too... well... strange. But there was no way that she could catch the phony right here! Beth could have been made to realize the switch, but the alien's hug had successfully melted her brain cells. Launchpad might have noticed, but today he was too depressed over Beth.

"Um... well... I guess you all should get ready to go to the Muddlefoots' picnic this afternoon, so I'll just... leave you for a while," said Beth. She was so nervous that she was shyly referring to the picnic as if she hadn't been invited.

"Oh, yeah, I'd forgotten! Gos, need any help getting ready?" Drake said.

"No thanks, Dad, I'll just go upstairs... I'm, uh, gonna be... changing clothes, so don't come up after me!" she said, and bolted up the stairs.

"Well... See you later," said Beth, and left to go to her home, two houses down the street.

Once she was gone, Launchpad said, "Y'know, DW, I don't think I'm gonna go to the picnic. I mean, I know I'm feeling better and all, but I don't wanna get the Muddlefoots sick. The TQ could use a tune-up, and- I think I'll just hang out at the tower this afternoon." It was pretty obvious that this was a preconceived excuse not to have to be around Beth as she drooled over Drake. Usually he could handle it. She just seemed to be doing it a LOT today.

"Fine," said Drake. "I'm going to take care of business," he said, pointing to Darkwing. "See you when I see you." As soon as Launchpad left, Drake turned to his double and smiled. If the first smile had been cold, this one was purely ice. Dry ice, the kind that would burn you if you touch it.

"So. You didn't know what you were getting into, did you, Drake?" Darkwing stopped struggling and looked at the alien speaking to him, shocked at his tone. "No, you obviously didn't. Fool. Puny earthling FOOL." The words weren't so much spoken as they were SPAT out at him, dripping with contempt. "If you had, you wouldn't have let me touch you. Agrajag is my name. I am a Surussian- I doubt YOUR race has heard of us. We are hunters. Our pores secrete a chemical that allows us to duplicate the features of any race in the galaxy. I suppose by now, you've figured out that all I need is a moment of skin-to-skin contact- or feather-to-feather, or whatever, and I can assume the form of my 'host'-- not to mention I get all information necessary to perfectly replicate that lifeform's character. Did you know that that Webfoot girl is in love with you? S'true," said the alien.

Darkwing's eyes widened. After all the times he'd yelled at her, she still...? He'd known that she didn't dislike him for the way he treated her, but it hadn't even occured to him that she would go so far as to LOVE him- after the way he treated her--! The shock was enough to keep him from struggling as the alien picked him up, slung him over his shoulder, and walked down the hall towards the closet with him.

Agrajag went on. "Yeah, she's got it bad for you. I don't know who's the bigger loser, you or her! Ah, well, it doesn't matter now- you're all going to be dead within twenty-four hours. And within fourty-eight hours, I suspect that the Earth will belong to my race. I was sent as a probe, to see if the Earth was worth adding to my races 'collection'- and y'know, it's not bad here! I'll set about securing things shortly!" He took a momentary pause and shook his head, as if to regain his own speech habits. "Well, I only get surface memories and general abilities, mind you, so it's a good thing that Webfoot woman reminded us of the picnic, or I never would have known," he said, and dumped Darkwing in front of the closet. He opened the door. "Ah, a containment unit! I would never have guessed that YOUR race would have something so predatory! Looks a little primitive..." He poked his head into the closet and clicked on the light. Darkwing watched him, completely baffled. 'Containment unit'? Well, it made sense that a slime blob wouldn't have a coat closet...

Agrajag continued. "No mechanized locks or stasis fields, but hey, you get what you pay for. You should be QUITE stable here." With that, he leaned down. "I think my next conquest had better be that little girl of yours. From what I gleaned from your and Beth's memories, she's quite perceptive-- She seems to be on the road to figuring things out. Ah, well, I've got time for all that. Lllllater."

Agrajag shoved Darkwing in the closet, hard, and slammed the door. "Have fun," his voice came through the wood. Darkwing instantly started struggling against his bonds. Things were bad enough before, but knowing the kind of danger Gosalyn was in now... He had to get out of here! Why had he chosen TODAY to have his buzzsaw cufflinks de-rusted? This could take hours for him to get out of! He pulled at the vacuum cleaner cord, but it had been tied well. Those IDIOTS! They'd just about sentenced Gosalyn to death!

Darkwing sighed. There was no time to think of that now. He set about rubbing his wrists together, trying desperately to slip out from the cord.

"Yooo-hooo, Gosalyn! Gos? Are you ready for the picnic or what?" asked Beth, as she knocked on Gosalyn's door. "Gos? You in there?" she said.

Gosalyn spent a second or two adjusting the net she'd put up just above the door. A good yank on the string near the side of the door would set it loose, and once the alien was tangled up in THAT, then she could set off all five of her long-range sucker guns. Finally satisfied that everything was in place, she answered. "Yeah, I'm here. Come on in." She kept her arm near the string, ready to yank if it wasn't REALLY Beth. But it was- the eyes were normal. Plus, that alien would really have to work to duplicate Beth's slightly goofy, sweet smile.

"Hi, Gos. What's taking so long?" she said as she came in, completely missing the big 'X' that was taped onto the floor under her feet. "Come on, we're all ready, let's go!"

"Um... I don't think I'm gonna go, Beth."

"What? Why not? Is something wrong?" she said, sitting on the bed. Gosalyn was more than a friend to Beth; in a way, she was almost a daughter, and Beth liked to think that she could help her handle some of the, er, problems that may arise in later years.

"Wellll...," said Gosalyn, hesitating. She decided that Beth could be trusted, and so said, "It's Dad. He's not Dad. He's the alien!"

This was obviously NOT what Beth had been expecting. She looked shocked. "Gosalyn, we settled this. That is your father, I am sure of it," she said firmly. Why she was so convinced was beyond Gosalyn- - maybe because she had hugged the thing and didn't want to admit it to herself. Gosalyn tried again.

"But, Beth-- I'm telling you, that's not Dad! It's some kind of brain-sucking slime monster, like in 'The Invasion of the Carbon- Based Lifeforms From the Planet Uru'!"

Beth stood up, thinking. Gosalyn held her breath hopefully. Obviously, Gosalyn had one heck of an imagination- but... Then again, there really was an alien. And Gos wouldn't purposely be so mean- spirited as to... Beth became more worried than before. The implication that Gosalyn might not even know that she was lying wasn't a very good thought, but for now, she decided to let it go. Maybe it was just a game.

She sighed. "I'm not going to tell your father about this, Gosalyn. It would break his heart if he knew that you didn't trust him. I'll tell him you're feeling sick, and you can stay here tonight. But I'm not going to cover for you beyond that, okay? And if he finds out, I'm not defending you." She'd somehow managed to take on a motherly tone of voice, and Gosalyn knew she wasn't kidding-- and she wasn't going to change her mind.

"Thanks, Beth," said Gosalyn reluctantly. Maybe this was all she was going to get, but she'd have to make the most of it anyway. "Where's Launchpad?" she asked.

"Oh, I think he's gone out for the evening." She looked disappointed for a moment, but then went on: "I'm going to the picnic now, so I'll see you later." After giving Gosalyn another rather stern look, she left.

"I never should have told her to be more assertive," muttered Gosalyn to herself. She was virtually allyless, she thought, until it hit her. "Of course! How could I have been so dumb? HONKER!" she exclaimed.

On her way downstairs, Beth ran into Drake, who was just about to go upstairs.

"Where are you going? I thought we were leaving!" said Beth.

"I'm going up to get Gosalyn!" he said.

"Oh, yeah... Uh, well, she's not coming. She's sick. She took some cough syrup to make her drowsy, and she should be down for the night," said Beth, trying her best to sound natural.

"Oh," said Drake. "Well, I'll just go up and kiss her goodnight, then."

"No-- she's asleep, I don't think you should disturb her. See her tomorrow, or later tonight, or something, okay?"

Drake looked blank for a moment, but there was something in his silence that was more unnerving than if he'd been yelling. Beth began to feel a little uneasy. Then he snapped out of it and smiled at her.

"Okay, let's go!" he said, and stepped off the bottom stair.