Disclaimer: I don't own the Weiss boys. So much more the pity.
Warnings: Excessive humor, probably lots of jokes that are corny and don't make sense, a limited amount of OOC-ness on the parts of various characters (mostly going by their fandom stereotypes), and, oh yeah - YAOI. Okay, granted, not as much as usual for me, but I'm writing this for a friend who had rather specific instructions on what kinds of Shonen Ai I could put in this story. (glare glare fume). For the full backstory, you'll have to go read 'Checkmate'.
Anyway, it's B + S, S x Y, and B x ^-^. Brad's end pairing is a secret. Suffice to say, you'll definitely be surprised. Heh heh heh.
****************
It was a quiet, sunny day in the Koneko, the local, much-loved flowers shop where all four pretty florists were currently on duty. Well. . . duty that consisted mainly of lounging about, as there were no customers at present. Omi diligently swept the floor, Ken sang endearingly off-tune, Yohji leaned nonchalantly against the counter, and Aya sat behind the register, reaching calmly for the glass of water Yohji had brought him. Oh yes. That glass was about to set everything in motion. Because, you see, Aya only -thought- it was water. He took a large swallow. Then Aya spluttered and coughed, dropping his cup and grabbing Ken's shoulder for support.
"Aya-kun!" Omi cried. "What's the matter?!" When Aya stopped coughing and finally straightened, he looked up and glared at Yohji.
"You," he hissed menacingly. "What was in that?"
Yohji just shrugged and winked at him. "Oh. . . I just thought I'd give you something with a little more kick in it, that's all."
Ken gaped at him. "Yohji! You know Aya doesn't drink!" Yohji rolled his eyes. Aya, having just gotten his breath back, saw this and snapped.
"Damnit, Kudou, that's the third time this week," he shouted, shocking all of his teammates. "I warned you, Kudou - I swear I'll make you pay for your irreverence." Yohji snorted. Suddenly, the phone rang. Eyes glowing with rage, Aya snatched it from its cradle. "Speak," he demanded. He listened momentarily, then his face contorted. "No, I have absolutely NO interest in-"
". . . "
"Well, yes actually, I-"
". . . "
"Yes - yes I would."
". . . "
"Of course. . . yes. . . yes, all right."
". . . "
"Thank you - thank you very much." With that, Aya hung up the phone, a huge smile on his face. His comrades stared. Finally, Ken spoke.
"Uh - Aya? What happened? Did they cancel our next mission?" Aya shook his head. "Did Aya-chan wake up? Did Takatori suddenly drop dead?" Aya shook his head again, muttering something that sounded distinctly like 'Shi-Ne' under his breath. "Well why're you smiling then?" Ken asked, exasperated. Without answering, Aya turned toward Yohji.
"Kudou." Yohji looked up from his cigarette. "Have you ever wanted to visit America?"
Yohji shrugged. "Sure - beer's cheaper." Ken snorted. Aya just smirked.
"Good - I'm sending you to sports camp." There was absolute silence for a moment, then two ear-splitting shrieks, one of rage and one of joy, filled the shop. Aya winced.
"You're doing WHAT?!" Yohji cried. Ken's eyes lit up and grew to Omi-size.
"SPORTS CAMP! Oh wow! Can I go, too, Aya? Please?"
Aya looked at him coldly. "What would be the point of sending -you- to sports camp?" Ken's face fell; Aya, not quite being the sadistic and heartless bastard everyone takes him for and feeling slightly guilty, added, "You're in fine shape Ken. If Kudou doesn't do something soon, he's going to overexert himself and drop dead."
Ken continued to pout, clearly not accepting this as a viable reason why he couldn't go. Glaring at both Yohji and Aya, he turned and made to leave the store. Omi however, equipped with his 'Weiss Crisis' detector, grabbed Ken's arm and pulled him up short. Feeling pity for Aya's obvious lack of social skills, he tried to placate the wounded athlete.
"Ne, Ken-kun, what Aya-kun meant to say is that we'd miss you too much if you went away."
Ken looked unconvinced. "Aya'd miss me?" Aya mumbled under his breath until Omi kicked him viciously. He sighed.
"I'd miss you," he muttered. Ken's kind and loving heart, fully enthusiastic about this rare bit of friendship, immediately returned the favor.
"I'd miss you, too," he said sincerely, all trace of unhappiness gone. Turning to Yohji, he grinned and commanded, "Have a good time for me, Yotan!" Yohji rose angrily.
"Oh no. No way in hell." He headed for the door, only to come face to face with Aya's katana.
"I have already paid for it," Aya growled. "You will -not- waste that money."
"Aya!" Yohji wailed, but the redhead had already shoved a suitcase into his hands and stalked away. Omi patted the older blonde's head.
"Don't worry, Yohji-kun. I'm sure you'll have a _wonderful_ time." Yohji groaned. Somewhere deep in the shop, Aya let out a cackle.
"Feel my wrath, Kudou! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!"
End Lesson 1
*******************
Ken: So, Yohji, what'd you learn today?
Yohji: Don't piss Aya off.
Aya: Hn. You'll do well to remember that.
Omi: Review please! The author would like to know what you thought!
Warnings: Excessive humor, probably lots of jokes that are corny and don't make sense, a limited amount of OOC-ness on the parts of various characters (mostly going by their fandom stereotypes), and, oh yeah - YAOI. Okay, granted, not as much as usual for me, but I'm writing this for a friend who had rather specific instructions on what kinds of Shonen Ai I could put in this story. (glare glare fume). For the full backstory, you'll have to go read 'Checkmate'.
Anyway, it's B + S, S x Y, and B x ^-^. Brad's end pairing is a secret. Suffice to say, you'll definitely be surprised. Heh heh heh.
****************
It was a quiet, sunny day in the Koneko, the local, much-loved flowers shop where all four pretty florists were currently on duty. Well. . . duty that consisted mainly of lounging about, as there were no customers at present. Omi diligently swept the floor, Ken sang endearingly off-tune, Yohji leaned nonchalantly against the counter, and Aya sat behind the register, reaching calmly for the glass of water Yohji had brought him. Oh yes. That glass was about to set everything in motion. Because, you see, Aya only -thought- it was water. He took a large swallow. Then Aya spluttered and coughed, dropping his cup and grabbing Ken's shoulder for support.
"Aya-kun!" Omi cried. "What's the matter?!" When Aya stopped coughing and finally straightened, he looked up and glared at Yohji.
"You," he hissed menacingly. "What was in that?"
Yohji just shrugged and winked at him. "Oh. . . I just thought I'd give you something with a little more kick in it, that's all."
Ken gaped at him. "Yohji! You know Aya doesn't drink!" Yohji rolled his eyes. Aya, having just gotten his breath back, saw this and snapped.
"Damnit, Kudou, that's the third time this week," he shouted, shocking all of his teammates. "I warned you, Kudou - I swear I'll make you pay for your irreverence." Yohji snorted. Suddenly, the phone rang. Eyes glowing with rage, Aya snatched it from its cradle. "Speak," he demanded. He listened momentarily, then his face contorted. "No, I have absolutely NO interest in-"
". . . "
"Well, yes actually, I-"
". . . "
"Yes - yes I would."
". . . "
"Of course. . . yes. . . yes, all right."
". . . "
"Thank you - thank you very much." With that, Aya hung up the phone, a huge smile on his face. His comrades stared. Finally, Ken spoke.
"Uh - Aya? What happened? Did they cancel our next mission?" Aya shook his head. "Did Aya-chan wake up? Did Takatori suddenly drop dead?" Aya shook his head again, muttering something that sounded distinctly like 'Shi-Ne' under his breath. "Well why're you smiling then?" Ken asked, exasperated. Without answering, Aya turned toward Yohji.
"Kudou." Yohji looked up from his cigarette. "Have you ever wanted to visit America?"
Yohji shrugged. "Sure - beer's cheaper." Ken snorted. Aya just smirked.
"Good - I'm sending you to sports camp." There was absolute silence for a moment, then two ear-splitting shrieks, one of rage and one of joy, filled the shop. Aya winced.
"You're doing WHAT?!" Yohji cried. Ken's eyes lit up and grew to Omi-size.
"SPORTS CAMP! Oh wow! Can I go, too, Aya? Please?"
Aya looked at him coldly. "What would be the point of sending -you- to sports camp?" Ken's face fell; Aya, not quite being the sadistic and heartless bastard everyone takes him for and feeling slightly guilty, added, "You're in fine shape Ken. If Kudou doesn't do something soon, he's going to overexert himself and drop dead."
Ken continued to pout, clearly not accepting this as a viable reason why he couldn't go. Glaring at both Yohji and Aya, he turned and made to leave the store. Omi however, equipped with his 'Weiss Crisis' detector, grabbed Ken's arm and pulled him up short. Feeling pity for Aya's obvious lack of social skills, he tried to placate the wounded athlete.
"Ne, Ken-kun, what Aya-kun meant to say is that we'd miss you too much if you went away."
Ken looked unconvinced. "Aya'd miss me?" Aya mumbled under his breath until Omi kicked him viciously. He sighed.
"I'd miss you," he muttered. Ken's kind and loving heart, fully enthusiastic about this rare bit of friendship, immediately returned the favor.
"I'd miss you, too," he said sincerely, all trace of unhappiness gone. Turning to Yohji, he grinned and commanded, "Have a good time for me, Yotan!" Yohji rose angrily.
"Oh no. No way in hell." He headed for the door, only to come face to face with Aya's katana.
"I have already paid for it," Aya growled. "You will -not- waste that money."
"Aya!" Yohji wailed, but the redhead had already shoved a suitcase into his hands and stalked away. Omi patted the older blonde's head.
"Don't worry, Yohji-kun. I'm sure you'll have a _wonderful_ time." Yohji groaned. Somewhere deep in the shop, Aya let out a cackle.
"Feel my wrath, Kudou! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!"
End Lesson 1
*******************
Ken: So, Yohji, what'd you learn today?
Yohji: Don't piss Aya off.
Aya: Hn. You'll do well to remember that.
Omi: Review please! The author would like to know what you thought!