A/N: Shifts in POV are marked by a pagebreak and kamaoji.

(๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

Reincarnation stories were always a big guilty pleasure of mine.

But, even I had to admit that these sort of stories were pretty clichéd. The overpowered protagonists who got their way in life without any sort of real struggle was definitely not helping their case. Not to mention, the plethora of eye-catching men and (or) women who'd throw themselves at the protagonist's feet simply because they were the central character of the narrative. These main characters usually achieved a 'good end' regardless of circumstance just because. It was a very self-indulgent sort of fiction that critics mocked and abhorred.

But I loved every bit of it. Every nasty and self-serving bit of it.

You see, I like stories that fell under this genre because the protagonists made decisions that I could sympathize with. Perhaps it was the inherent genre savviness that came along with being an isekai protagonist, or the vague feeling of power over having an insight on people's fate or maybe it was the harem of good-looking characters. Regardless, I felt inclined to believe that self-insert protagonists made considerably rational choices, more so than canon protags who just had this irritating tendency to make choices out of friendship and affections that's just borderline stupid.

This dating game I was playing right now was a prime example of that.

The heroine in it was very pretty—the main reason I bought it the game actually—but was equally prone to making bad life decisions to the point that I wanted to throw my handheld console to the wall. No. Scratch that, it had such inconsistent writing that I could only curse myself on why I purchased it despite being aware of it's poor rating on Amazon.

Damn it. This was divine retribution for being easily swayed by pretty faces. The art was great, don't get me wrong, but the scenario was just an absolute train wreck and the game was littered with bugs. I had to reset my game thrice within the last hour because my save file kept on disappearing!

I suspect that quality control played hooky on their jobs. Tsk.

Fed up, I quickly shut my Vita off. I just couldn't do it anymore. I'm not strong enough. This was just too much. After finishing two routes with repetitive scenes and seemingly random developments (the protagonist had amnesia at least twice), I just wanted to take a break and indulge in one of the few life pleasures that never betrayed me; a bath.

With an eager grin, I made my way to the bathroom, stripping myself as I went – perks of living alone without my mother to nag me—before dumping a newly purchased bath bomb into the tub. Once the water tinged into a very pretty shade of pink, I slowly lowered myself into the tub, savoring the feeling of the warm water lapping against my skin.

"Ah," A moan escaped my lips as I leaned my back against the tub. This is exactly what I needed.

Unfortunately life rarely ever went my way, so my time in paradise was rudely interrupted by the loud screeching of my phone. I opted to ignore it but it rang for a couple more times, vibrating itself to the edge of the counter. Given the haste at which I was receiving texts, it was probably something important. I felt reluctant to leave the warm embrace of my bubbly water but left anyway because if it was Nishikino-sensei, he would flay me alive for disregarding him.

But as I stretched my arm, a loud explosion echoed from the outside and I had to steady myself against the tub.

What.

The.

Hell?!

Was one of the local children playing with fireworks again? Or was it my neighbor? That surly man did have a penchant for experimenting with various dangerous chemicals despite my many warnings.

Either way, screw them for ruining my precious bath time!

Fuming, I got out of the tub, angrily grabbing my towel along the way in order to give the person who disrupted my bath some admonishment. With the towel firmly secured around my body, I moved to unlock the bathroom door. I swear, I was going to give them such a tongue lashing that—

My complaints quickly died down my throat.

I swallowed nervously.

I was not in my room. Rather, I don't think I was even in my apartment anymore.

Upon opening my door, what greeted me was an alleyway of sorts with trash littering the mud-caked pavement instead of my room littered with books. The smell of burnt rubber invaded my nose and I cringed in disgust. How the hell did I even get here in the first place? Was I dreaming? Did I fall asleep in the bath again?

I probably should've listened to my mom about not bathing for too long.

Some bit of dust got into my eye and I blinked in confusion before rubbing it as I tugged my towel a little closer. The dry smog that permeated the air made me feel a little chilly and very dirty.

Looking around the dirty alleyway, I could only come to one conclusion: I slipped on a bar of soap then died and was now reincarnated into a fictional world where I would score some hot guy (or guys) with whom I would have hot and steamy make-out sessions.

Ha. Ha. I jest of course, as if such outlandish things that only happened in manga or light novels would happen to me.

Of course, the only logical conclusion was that I was currently hallucinating. All those bath bubbles probably got to my head, probably shouldn't have bought them from that shady store. Thankfully however, my reasoning was still intact which meant all I had to do was patiently wait it out. I think. I've never had a hallucination while being under influence but I suppose there was a first time for everything.

Yay for reckless college hobbies.

After coming upon a decision, I opted to return to my bathroom. It was a safe space. It offered a sense of familiarity as I waited for this strange hallucination to pass. No sense in wandering about and getting myself injured. Who knows what kind of sharp object I might ram myself into?

But as I was about to take a step in my intended direction, a soft groan resounded in the alley that was seemingly empty. What.

Was I getting auditory hallucinations in addition to visual hallucinations as well? Goddamnit.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a dark lump twitch from the corner.

And okay, fine, I have to admit that at the time I had a momentary lapse in judgment. Hallucination or not, I shouldn't have gone near that suspicious lump and I sure as hell shouldn't have helped that suspicious lump. In my defense however, I had an unfortunate sense of decency to help people.

I'm going to regret this, aren't I ?

With that heavy thought in mind, I inched closer and closer to the lump, carefully planting my bare feet on the smoother parts of the pavement. The alley was damp and even I knew not to casually step on what seemed like green goop. Even if I knew that all these wasn't real, that didn't mean I was curious enough to feel all those suspicious substances against my bare skin.

To my surprise however, the previously unidentified lump was actually a human being lying prone. Pieces of rubble covered them, with burns and cuts littered across their entire body. I winced a bit as I noticed that the rubble was digging into some of the fresh injuries. Those injuries would be painful to clean and dress.

…This was a very strange hallucination to have. And I wasn't enjoying any part of it so far.

Tentatively, I used my toe to poke at the person's shoulder. And to no one's surprise, they didn't even respond. At all.

Feeling a little bold—in more ways than one, ha—I nudged them again, this time turning them to lay on their back. And—oh.

Oh.

I take my earlier statement back. I was enjoying this situation very much.

The unconscious person was in fact a man. A very, very handsome man. Okay, that wasn't even enough to do him justice. Dark messy hair framed his well-proportioned face with a well-sculpted nose and long dark lashes- you know what, I'm not even doing him any more justice like this. I wasn't blessed with any sort of creativity with words so all I can say is that this man was smoking hot.

I winced.

Perhaps the latter compliment was not the most apt to use considering his state of minor burns and singed clothes.

I grimaced, suddenly feeling bad for lusting after a grievously injured man, hallucination or no.

Another weak groan came from the man and I scrambled to his side, uncaring of the rubble that jabbed into my kneecaps. "Hey, hey, are you okay?!" My first aid training kicked into gear as I calmly assessed his body. Aside from the cuts and burns, there didn't seem to be any life threatening injuries. "Sir!" I shook him back and forth again but he just remained still in my arms like a rag doll.

A very attractive rag doll, a not so helpful part of my mind supplied.

Priorities!

Anyways.

I cursed under my breath as I tightened my towel closer to my body. Even under distress, I still felt like I needed to maintain what little I could of my dignity. It wouldn't do good to randomly flash myself in all my naked glory to a stranger as soon as he awoke. As much as I was proud of my body, I don't think that'd be something he would want to wake up to. In fact, it might even send him into a state of shock.

Once I was sure that I wasn't in danger of being sued for public indecency, I leaned my ear against his mouth and felt momentarily relieved as I felt ragged puffs of breath tickle my ear until it went to an abrupt halt.

Shit. This man needed resuscitation and fast.

For a brief period, I forgot about how this was all a hallucination. I was so caught up in the moment that I failed to consider the future repercussion of my actions and immediately prepared to resuscitate him. I rhythmically pumped my hands against his chest before clumsily crashing my mouth against his to provide him with air.

A little disclaimer. I have never performed CPR on an actual, living, breathing, human being. I was certified and trained for it yes, but my training was limited to making out with creepy lifeless dolls.

As irresponsible as it seemed, this was better than no attempt at resuscitation.

And so there I was in the middle of nowhere, trying to be a good Samaritan, with my face scrunched in concentration as I pushed against the man's chest and alternated with smashing my mouth against his.

Internally, however, I was screaming. One misstep and I could be sued by hallucinatory lawyers.

Then, the man let out a weak cough and I nearly wept in relief. Oh thank god. It looks like all those training classes weren't all for naught. Nishikino-sensei would kill me if he found out that his student couldn't even do basic resuscitation techniques. But before I could even revel on my own competence, the man spoke and I felt a chill crawl down my spine.

"Drunk on pain, I taste the kiss of death." He murmured out, trailing his eyes appreciatively across my form, before finally meeting my eyes.

To my dismay, his eyes lingered on my chest a few seconds more than I would've liked.

On another situation, I would've swooned because his voice was rich like velvet- and damn it, I'm not good at similes or metaphors but his voice made my knees weak. Coupled with a handsome face and a fine physique, this man just screamed perfection.

If this were a dating simulation game, I had no doubts that he would be the main love interest.

But handsome or not, a pervert was still a pervert. So I frowned in response, crossing my arms in front of my ample assets. "Hey. Eyes up sir. My face is here."

"Ah. Where are my manners? Forgive me. I didn't realize that the Goddess of Death would take offense." He smiled, making no move to get up from his comfortable position on my lap. In fact, he even had the audacity to shift into a more comfortable spot!

The nerve!

"Pretty sure that the Goddess of Death doesn't parade around in nothing but a bath towel." I snorted as I moved the man to lay back on the pavement once more. Without waiting for a response, I ripped the hem of my already short towel as an impromptu rag to clean his wounds. Human life was more important than my modesty after all.

A pervert he may be, but even perverts needed their wounds treated.

Putting on an air of indifference and professionalism, I began to clear his wounds of pebbles. The jerk didn't even wince a bit and just looked entertained. Tsk. Feeling a bit irate, I bit out. "Sir, you need medical assistance. Do you have a cellphone we can use to call an ambulance?"

"And what use would a phone be for Death ?" The calm smile never left his face as his eyes followed every movement I did.

I physically couldn't roll my eyes back any further. This guy needed to chill with the mysterious guy act. "Sir, I'm not a Goddess of Death. I'm just a concerned citizen who happened to pass by."

"Ah. A pity. My time has not come then." An unreadable look crossed his features, erasing the earlier warmth that seemed to fill his gaze.

With grace and ease unexpected from a man who was previously terribly injured, he rose to his full height but buckled at the last moment. I caught him before he could fall to the ground and wrapped my arms around his torso. One of his arms came to rest on my bare shoulders as his body pressed against mine.

I had to fight back the blush that threatened to erupt on my cheeks.

Oh gods. I was in a strange alley, nearly naked, with a good-looking man pressed against me, and I was quite possibly hallucinating.

Was this good or bad fortune?!

"Hey, sir! Be a little more careful! You're in no condition to be up and about!" In an attempt to fight back my embarrassment, I chided him, pointedly looking at the alley as I ignored his pretty eyes.

He chuckled –his mouth was right next to my ear, Jesus Christ – and I swear, I nearly dropped him then and there because this situation was so not good for my poor little inexperienced heart! But I quickly squashed my own feeling of shame and I slid my arm under his shoulder to support him a little better.

"Back pocket." He suddenly said.

"Huh?" I made the mistake of looking at his face and I immediately felt my cheeks grow hot. His eyes were really very pretty.

"My phone is in my back pocket." He clarified. "I would get it myself but I've got my hands a little occupied right now." He paused for a bit, then. "Enjoying the view?"

My jaw dropped at his insinuation – not that it wasn't untrue—but I quickly snapped my mouth shut to spare myself of any further humiliation. I was not as thirsty as he implied I was! "I am not!" I don't think I was very convincing just then as his lips split into an amused sort of smile and I felt my cheeks grow even hotter.

I didn't think it was possible to dislike someone I've barely met this much.

Grunting in annoyance, I opted to comply with his request in an attempt to busy myself, not so gently shoving the bloodied rag I used to tend to his wounds onto his hands. He remained silent as I blindly groped around in his pocket, careful to not touch any part of his derriere—even if it looked nice (The pervert even chuckled at my discomfort!). As soon as I finally fished his phone out of his pocket, I typed in the emergency hotline- only to have it plucked away from my hand before I could press anything else.

Ignoring my spluttering, the man deftly dialed in another number before hitting the call button.

"Mm. I'm alive. Though a little worse for wear at the moment. " A pause. "We got it? That's good. Send Machi to my location."

Without even pausing to say goodbye, he hid the phone in his back pocket once more.

"I thought you couldn't get your phone yourself?" I frowned.

"Hm, did I say that?"

"Yes you did..." I shot him a wary glance. "You know what—never mind."

"My comrades will arrive soon, miss. Your duty as a concerned citizen, while appreciated, ends here." He flashed me another smile that was meant to look amiable but now that I was a little less flustered by his attention, I realized that his smile didn't reach his eyes.

It was frankly, a little unnerving.

"Right," I nodded, pulling away from him once I was sure he could stand on his own.

A few seconds just passed with neither of us budging an inch and just staring at each other.

Well.

This was awkward.

"Um," I began, inching my way to my bathroom door. "I have some first aid supplies that we can use while waiting for your friends."

I turned on my heel to make my way back to the safety of my bathroom. But a warm calloused hand firmly gripped my wrist before I could even take one step. "Miss," The odd stranger looked at me thoughtfully for a few seconds, as if debating something. A beat later, then. "Here, a little something as thanks." He slipped something cold and round into my hands, making me jump in surprise.

Brows furrowed in contemplation and very much cold from the biting wind I may add, I rolled the peculiar item in my hand. It was a small pearl shaped gem that glinted purple in the night light."What is this?" I asked, dumbly.

"A little token of my appreciation for having saved my life." He replied, shrugging his shoulders. He was still smiling."I have no use for it. Use it as you see fit."

"So in other words, you're giving me trash? That doesn't seem very nice you know." I looked up at him, a little offended. Did I look like some sort of trash collector to him?

In response to my question, a soft chuckle left the man's lips. I frowned. Why? Did I say anything funny? "Show it to the right people and you will be set for life."

"Right," I deadpanned. "Okay then."

I tentatively took a few steps backwards, eyeing him warily. What a strange man, giving off trash to random people. "Well. I should probably go get that first aid kit before any of your injuries get infected."

Not bothering to hear his response, I dashed back to my bathroom, dumping the strange purple gem (At least I thought it was) on top of my laundry hamper for safekeeping. After I was sure that it wouldn't roll off into oblivion, I dug through my medicine cabinet before finally unearthing the kit I needed. "A-ha!"

With a triumphant smile, I ran back to the door and kicked it open only to have the sight of my messy room greet me.

"Oh."

(￣꒳￣)

"How interesting, " Kuroro murmured to himself as he watched the concerned citizen disappear into nothingness. She had said something about picking up a first aid kit to treat him but as soon as she reached the end of the alley—she disappeared in a flash of blue light.

Curious. Some kind of nen perhaps?

With his interest piqued, Kuroro stared at the blood soaked rag she left on his on his hands. He ran a thumb across the scrap of fabric and found that it was a lot softer than it looked and had underlying scent of—bananas?

Curiouser and curiouser.

It did not escape his notice that she had ripped it off (without any sort of hesitation, he noted) of what minimal clothing she had. How uncharacteristically kind of anyone from Meteor City.

The woman even went out of her way to resuscitate him. She was evidently trained in giving CPR, and Kuroro wondered if she worked at one of the nearby hospitals.

It would perhaps be interesting if he were to track her down one day, if only to return the scrap of cloth.

One day.

EDITTED AS OF 08/13/17

Hello guys! This is my first oc story for HxH. I hope you enjoyed the story so far and I would love to hear feedback as it motivates me to write more! This fic was inspired by the many reincarnation light novel , manga and fanfics I've read! It's not really going to be serious and is more of a parody than anything . Ahaha. It will be romance but I'm not sure who I want our protagonist to end up with just yet but I'll be tagging the possible candidates . For now though, I'll be focusing more on story building and funny shenanigans.

The protagonist's name isn't gonna be revealed until the next chapter but her name is Hazuki Taniyama and she's around college age if you were interested.

Please review!