Disclaimer: As usual I don't own the X-men, neither do I own the song "I'll Walk" that honor goes to Bucky Covington. Hope you enjoy yet another tear jerker song fic of mine.
We
were 18, it was prom night.
We had our first big fight.
She
said "Pull this car over".
I did and then I told her, "I
don't know what you are crying for".
I grabbed her hand, as
she reached for the door.
It was silent inside the car except for the sound of the engine and tires as they sped over the asphalt road. Normally Remy LeBeau would have been in high spirits in this scenario, driving down a back road in his classic '69 black and red camaro with a beautiful woman in the seat next to him, tonight however his mood was on the opposite end of the spectrum.
Earlier tonight they had been at the prom held in Upper Manhattan. The Professor had decided to rent a special building for the night so the students had a chance to get off mansion grounds for a while. Everything had been going perfectly in Remy's opinion up until the moment when Rogue had stormed up to him and demanded he take her back to the Institute. It was the last thing she said to him in the past thirty minutes even though he had questioned her time and time again on the way to the car and out of the city limits what was wrong.
Remy glanced out the corner of his eyes at Rogue now. He hated that the night was ruined, especially when she looked so beautiful. Her chestnut hair had been pulled back and twisted up on her head with the two white locks curled and hanging down on either side. The black dress fit her like a glove to show off every mouth watering curve she had, he had particularly enjoyed the slit up one side to her upper thigh. She'd had to hide the slit by throwing Remy's trench coat over her shoulders or Logan would never have allowed her out of the mansion.
Rogue was staring angrily out the window, having refused to even look at him upon entering the car. Finally Remy had enough of the silence. "What is it Rogue? You even gon' tell m' what I done wrong?"
At last Rogue looked at him, there was such fire in those green eyes that a lesser man would have backed down. Never let it be said, though, that Remy LeBeau was a lesser man. "That's what's so horrible 'bout this whole thang, Remy! Ya don't even re'lize what y' done." She said throwing her hands up.
"Den tell me, damn it!" Remy demanded.
"Betsy! Ya were practically droolin' ovah her breasts in that dress o' hers. It took y' fifteen minutes t' go get punch, so ah go lookin' for ya and find ya with ya face buried in her chest!" she screamed at him.
Remy looked away from the road with his mouth open in awe. "Remy never even touch de femme!" he said reverting to speaking in third person.
"Well ya might as well have been, ya eye balls was practically touchin'them." Rogue snapped. "And look back at tha road befoah ya kill us both."
Remy quickly looked back at the road for a second before looking at Rogue once again, "Remy don' need y' t' tell 'im how t' drive. Y' wanna be a back seat driver y' can get out."
Rogue stared at him in shocked silence. Remy sighed, "Look chere, I sorry. Y'know I didn' mean dat."
She shook her head slowly from side to side, "No, that sounds like a good idea. Ah'll just walk tha rest o' tha way home."
"Now Rogue, I ain't gonn'…" Remy began before Rogue interrupted him tears of hurt and anger filling her emerald eyes. "No, ah mean it, pull tha car ovah Remy or so help me ah'll jump out while it's still movin'."
De femme jus' crazy 'nough t' do it. Remy thought to himself as he slowed down and eased the car off to the side of the road. "Come on nah, I don' know what y' even cryin' for, girl." Rogue reached out for the handle to the door, ignoring him.
"Rogue, dis is stupid!" he exclaimed gripping her free hand tight. "Jus' calm down now."
She
said, I'll walk.
Let go of my hand.
Right now I'm hurt, and you
don't understand.
So just be quiet.
And later we will
talk.
Just leave, don't worry.
I'll walk.
Rogue looked over her shoulder at him and said real quiet like, "Ah'll walk. Tha mansion ain't much fartha down tha road, maybe a mile, so let go of my hand…please."
"But Rogue." Remy protested as she slipped her hand out of his.
"Remy, please. Ah'm hurt right now an' ya don't even see why. Ah think that hurts even more than ya lookin' at someone else. Just… be quiet for right now, no more talkin', we'll talk when ah get home and ah've had a chance t' cool off." She said. Remy watched her dejectedly as she opened the door and got out. She leaned down through the open window to peer at him, his red irises shining sadly in the dark of the car. "Just leave Remy. Ah'll be fine, don't worry. Ah'll walk."
It
was a dark night, a black dress.
Driver never saw her, around the
bend.
I never will forget the call, or driving to the
hospital
when they told me her legs still wouldn't move.
I
cried, when I walked into her room.
Remy had been waiting over two hours in Rogue's room in the dark for her to come home. He hadn't even bothered changing out of his suit when he got to the mansion. He felt like a royal dick for driving off, what kind of man drives off from a woman in the middle of no where like that? Even if the woman stubbornly refused to take one step until she saw his tail lights disappear. The more time that passed without her coming showing up the quicker he smoked one cigarette behind the other. He had called her cell so many times he lost count, but every time it went straight to her voice mail. "How long it take t' walk a lil ol' mile?" Remy said anxiously as he pushed up the sleeve of his jacket to check his watch for the hundredth time.
From within the folds of cloth his phone started ringing. He relaxed just a bit thinking Rogue was calling him from her phone to come pick her up. "Feet prob'ly hurt too much in dem heels t' walk." He said smugly to himself. The caller id didn't say "Rogue" though when he looked at the phone, it was a number he didn't recognize. Remy frowned and flipped it open, " Allo?"
That phone conversation set Remy's entire world spinning out of control. He had raced out the mansion to the garage and jumped on his motor cycle in lieu of his car so he could weave in and out of any slow traffic once he reached the city. Logan had been calling from within the hospital in the city where Rogue had been taken.
The basic facts as told by the driver were he had been driving around the curve, foolishly reaching for his cell phone that had fallen in the floor, by the time he looked back up his car had swerved across the road. It had been so dark out on the back road with no lights and Rogues black dress made her hard to see so he didn't correct the cars path in time and hit her. He dialed 911 immediately and she was taken back to the city in the ambulance. They had collected her purse with wallet inside from the scene of the accident and called Logan who was listed as her emergency contact. Logan was going to call Remy sooner, but before he had a chance the doctor came out and gave them the unfortunate news that Rogue's legs weren't moving in response to any stimuli. If Logan had said anything further after that Remy didn't know because he hung up the phone and was on his way.
His hair was wind blown and his clothes were rumpled when he found the others waiting in the corridor another hour later. Traffic had been hellacious in the city and then when he had reached the hospital he had been sent to every place except where he needed to be when trying to find them. Logan, Jean, Scott, Ororo, Bobby, Kitty, Kurt, even Warren and Betsy were either leaning or sitting against the wall with morose expressions. Ororo threw her arms around Remy when she saw him to offer her comfort, but his arms remained limp at his side, he looked right over the weather witch's café au lait shoulder to Logan, "Can I see her yet?"
"You can see her gumbo, but look you need to keep yourself pulled together. Rogue doesn't need anyone going in there and stressing her out. She's awake and stable, but we don't want to do anything that's going to change that, you understand me?" Logan said in a calm voice that didn't reveal how tore up he was inside. His stripes, the kid he had come to care about like a daughter, was laid up in a hospital bed, maybe never to walk again.
He wanted to be mad at Remy so much, he wanted to tell the punk kid that he couldn't go in there and see Rogue and that he would stay away from her for the rest of their lives if he knew what was good for him, but Logan couldn't do it. Rogue had tried to explain as best she could through the meds that she had made Remy leave her. Logan wanted to argue, to say that a real man would never have drove off, but one look at Remy changed his mind. The kid looked like he had been dragged through hell, he was the walking dead and looked like he'd aged thirty years since Logan had last saw him at the prom. Kid hadn't even bothered grabbing a helmet in his rush to get here.
Remy nodded quickly and eased out of Ororo's arms, "O'course. Remy won' upset chere for de world. Remy gotta see her, where is she?"
Logan jerked his thumb to the end of the hall at two big wooden doors, "Through the double doors and to the right. She's the fifth room down."
Remy knew he had promised to keep it together when he saw Rogue, but when he walked in to the room and saw his precious ange hooked up to those monitors, with cuts and bruises on her arms and face, that plastic tube connected to her nose, he felt the tears start to fall down his cheeks. A broken sob caught in his chest, the sound making Rogue open her eyes and look in his direction. "Aww Rogue… chere…aww no, t'sall my fault." Remy choked out. "Y' might never walk again an' it be all Remy fault. Remy such a fuck up, he ruin evry'ting, y' should hate Remy, y' got ev'ry right t'."
She
said, I'll walk.
Please come and hold my hand.
Right now I'm
hurt, and I don't understand.
Lets just be quiet, and later we can
talk.
Please stay, don't worry.
I'll walk.
"Shh" Rogue soothed softly, her voice sounding fragile as she looked, "I'll walk again, Remz." She held out one pale hand that trembled with the effort, "Come hold my hand, please sugah. I need you to be close to me."
Remy sluggishly moved to her side and took a seat in the chair pulled up to the bed. He lay his head against the bed to hide his tears, his heart breaking even as he felt Rogue's hand move slowly with a feathers touch through his hair. He should be the one comforting her and yet here she was supporting him, reassuring him everything would be fine.
"Ah could never hate y' sugah. Yoah my heart an' soul." She whispered. "Ah know Ah'm hurt pretty bad, and Ah don't rightly understand everythin' they told me, but Ah trust Hank to fix me up when they transport me to the mansion."
"Chere y' gotta hate Remy. He de reason y' here. If Remy nev' drove off y'd be home righ' nah." Remy mumbled into the mattress.
"Shh," Rogue said again, never ceasing to smooth his hair no matter how sore her arm was. "Let's jus' be quiet foah a while, we'll talk later. Jus' stay with me, please, and don't worry 'bout none o' this. It ain't yoah fault, any of it. Ah'll walk, jus' ya wait an' see."
I
held her hand through everything.
The weeks and months of
therapy.
And I held her hand and asked her, to be my bride.
She's
dreamed from a little girl, to have her daddy bring her down the
isle.
So from her wheelchair, she looks up to him and smiles.
Remy held her hand and was at her side through it all. He was there every day and night at the hospital until they transferred her to the mansion. He only ever left to shower and get fresh clothes and then he was right back at her side. At first he slept in the chair next to the bed, her hand in his, and then after she had healed up a little more he would sleep in the small hospital bed with her curled up against his side, regardless of the nurses protesting it.
It was great when she finally came home to the mansion, there had been a big welcome home party thrown for her and she and Remy danced together even though she was in a wheel chair.
While she could still fly, Hank wanted her to stay earth bound until he knew she would not do any damage, and also so she did not come to rely on flight alone instead of focusing on walking again.
The therapy was grueling, the progress was small and few and far between it seemed to her. Days turned to weeks and weeks in to months. There were times when she wanted to quit, when she broke down sobbing and begged Remy to leave her and find someone who had two working legs. There were times when she felt like she hated him for pushing her so hard to keep working on it, times when she said hurtful things to him, but Remy would just tell her that he knew she didn't mean that, that he loved her no matter what, and he wasn't going to give up on her or let her submit to defeat.
The day she walked the space of ten feet, no matter how wobbly and slow she was about it, from Hank to Remy was one of the best days of her life. The three of them and shouted and cheered for ten little steps, Remy had taken her in his arms and spun her around in circles kissing her fiercely on the lips. At the end of that session after Hank had left them alone to go record her progress Remy knelt down in front of her wheel chair and took her hand in his. He kissed her knuckles gently and looked up in to her eyes. "Marry me, Rogue." He said, his eyes blazing like crimson fire with the hope in them. When Rogue said yes Remy knew he was the luckiest man in the world and even if she never walked like she used to, he would never abandon her, that he would be at her side always. If marrying her meant he had to spend the rest of his days carrying her in his arms from point A to point B, then he'd do it with a smile on his face and pride in his heart because she was his and that was enough for him.
It took just a month to plan the wedding with Jean and Ororo pitching in to help. The only detail that remained left to take care of a week before the wedding was who would escort Rogue down the isle. From the time she was a little girl she had always dreamed her father would be the one who would give her away, but then her mutation and kicked in when she was a teen and her family had ran her off. That didn't mean she was without a father though, in the years that she had come to know Logan he had become more of a father to her than her own had ever been. He worried over her, looked out for her, protected her, and tried his best to stop her from making the stupid mistakes that come along with youth.
Now the day was here and Rogue was waiting on one side of the heavy oak doors that would lead out to the gardens Ororo tended so lovingly. Logan stood next to her wheel chair looking nervous because of her plan she had shared with him. She had never walked such a long distance since before the accident, but Rogue wanted to surprise Remy by walking the entire length of the isle to him. "Stripes, are you sure about this. I don't think you should push it. I'm not saying you shouldn't walk, but maybe we should go halfway in the chair before you try standing."
And
says, I'll walk.
Please hold my hand.
I know that this will
hurt, I know you understand.
Please daddy don't cry.
This is
already hard.
Let's go, don't worry.
I'll walk
Rogue looked up at Logan with a peaceful smile, "Ah'll walk, jus' hold my hand, that's all Ah ask." She said. "Ah know this is gonna hurt, but Ah want to, no, Ah have to do this. Ah know you understand, there's jus' some things a person has to do foah themselves, not jus' foah those around them."
Logan took her hand and helped her to stand, her white satin slipper clad feet steady on the carpet. Tears welled up in his eyes, proud of the fighter and survivor that he saw standing before him. Of course if anyone had asked him he would deny such sissy behavior, Wolverine's did not cry.
Rogue wrapped hear arms around his neck and hugged him tightly, "Please, Daddy, don't cry. This is already hard without us both bawlin' like babies." She said as she pulled back. Logan stared at her with such love, she had called him daddy. Him, the gruff and wild Canadian. He never thought anyone would call him that, but she had. He sniffled and cleared his throat, nodding, "Ain't crying, just got something in my eye." He said using the old cliché.
Rogue laughed softly, "Let's go, don't worry about it. I'll walk the distance." Logan placed an arm around her waist just in case her legs fell and took her hand in his. The double doors opened up to the let in the bright sunshine and far down the isle stood Remy, her own pardox, her devilish guardian angel. She took that first step with Logan in to the light outside from the dark interior of the mansion, that one step taking her towards her future that was waiting on her and taking her out of the darkness that had been these past months. That one step starting her on the journey to her Remy.
