Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight

Author's Note: One-sided JacobxBella. AU. It could take place during the second book or it could take place in the future after the fourth book. W/e. Don't like the pairing then don't flame. Nobody's making you read it.

&&&

It started out with a kiss. How did it end up like this? Jacob asked himself as he sat down on a broken log. I wasn't the rebound guy. What we had was real.

Silence

Bella stared at the moon as she played with her wavy brown hair. She was sitting on the roof of her house. She felt lost tonight, and very lonely. The moon sparkled at her, as if it were smiling, but she only frowned back. She could see Edward's face staring back at her. Tears fell down her face as she stared at the reflection. Bella felt like screaming or hitting something. She wanted to do anything to get rid of this feeling of loneliness inside her. Edward had left a few nights ago, but to Bella it felt like it'd happened only moments ago. She bent her head down and let more tears fall down to the ground. She let small sobbing noises escape.


Jacob walked off of the reservation restless and aggravated. He relished in the feel of the warm summer air. It had a calming effect on his nerves. He had walked quite a ways, contemplating over his relationship problems, before he realized that his body had carried him to the destination that his thoughts desired. For what seemed the millionth night in a row he was standing at the edge of the woods behind Bella's house gazing up at her window.

"I have to stop torturing myself like this."

He started the walk back to his house when he heard little noises. He glanced around hastily trying to locate the source. He finally looked up to see the form of Bella on her roof. He frowned and hurried over. He climbed up the lattice on the side of her house until he got to the roof of the porch. He then shimmied himself up on top of the roof of the house. She was sitting in the center of the roof sitting on the apex. She was hunched over; it was obvious that she was crying. So he walked over to her and sat down next to her. She looked at him, her eyes filled with sadness.

"Bella" He inquired, as she stared at the moon some more. She didn't say a word, but then again, she didn't have to. Jacob knew how distraught she was over Edward leaving, she hadn't left her house or even accepted visitors since then. So he just looked at the night sky with her.

He always wondered how he would feel if Bella ever left. Jacob decided that he didn't want to know how it would feel. He wanted to keep her near him always, even if he had to deal with her love for Edward. He grimaced at the thought of her loving Edward for the rest of her life. He clenched his fists together and in a very selfish way, thought about being happy that Edward was finally gone. Jacob heard a louder sob next to him and saw Bella breaking down more. She placed her hands over her faces and sobbed uncontrollably.

Finally, she spoke,"Why, Jacob! Why did he have to leave!" Jacob placed his hand on Bella's back and rubbed it gently. Jacob wasn't happy that Edward left. How could he be, when Edward leaving meant saddening Bella so much? Bella leaned down and Jacob caught her and held her gently. He just let her cry in his lap. Jacob looked down at Bella, she looked so helpless. They sat there like that for a long time, before Bella lifted her head up. Jacob looked at her curiously as Bella stared at him. He started to grow embarrassed as her gaze bore into him. He looked away.

"Why are you here right now, Jacob?" Jacob turned to look at her. She seemed almost angry as she asked him this. Her tears were all gone and she had a resolute look in her eyes. Jacob looked to the ground below, "Wh- What do you mean, Bella?" Bella grabbed his face in her hands and tilted his face back to her.

"Don't look away, answer me. Why are you here comforting me?" Jacob blushed, this being the first time Bella had ever touched his face so gently. He looked back into her eyes and started to panic a bit. His blush grew deeper as he attempted to answer, without giving away everything. "I care about you, Bella..."

"How much?" Jacob's eyes widened and he felt some tears come to his eyes. He wrenched his face away from Bella's hands and let the tears fall to the ground. He whispered, barely audible, "...more than you can imagine." Bella felt herself becoming sad as she thought of her time with Jacob in the past. Jacob had always been there for her, but she had ignored him and brushed him off. Jacob was a lot like her, and now she felt so selfis. She scooted closer to Jacob, while he still stared below, the blush still evident on his face.

"Jacob, I'm sorry." Jacob looked over to see Bella leaning her face closer to his. He closed his eyes and felt her lips press against his softly. She crushed her lips against his harder before she pulled back, this time she was blushing too. Jacob's face had gotten red, and he just stared back at her. Bella smiled at him, and he grinned back shyly.

But those feelings, that moment had only lasted so long. Soon Edward came back. He returned to Bella and she to him. Once again Jacob was forgotten about. Jacob shook his head. He had to stop thinking those depressing thoughts. He had to keep his jealousy in check.

Jacob sensed someone near him. He shrunk back into the darkness until his back hit the trunk of a tree. Quietly he climbed halfway up the branches and sat down, waiting for the person to reveal themselves.

It was Edward.

Well of course it was Edward. Who else would it be? The only other option would be a robber and someone like that would only put Bella in danger. Jacob grinned at these thoughts. She is in more danger than she would be if she were in the arms of a rapist.

Using his vampire skills, Edward jumped up to the window ledge to Bella's room entered through the open window. The light came on. I should leave. I shouldn't watch this. It's only going to upset me.

She walks to him and he embraces her.

They kiss as she places her hands on his chest.

Her shirt falls to the floor.

Her jeans.

Her bra.

Her panties.

I can't look, it's killing me. Jacob turned his head away, tears welling up in his eyes.

Now they're going to bed. My stomach is sick. Jacob jumped from his branch and began to run. In what direction he was head he didn't know. He didn't know where he wanted to go. All he knew is that he had to get away from what he saw. He had to run away from those images.

***

Months passed and Jacob did not return to his spot in Bella's backyard during his midnight wanderings. Instead he tried to find new ways to keep himself occupied. He hung out with the guys more often. He forced himself to flirt more with girls. He even spent more time studying his culture.

But alas, it was not enough.

Jacob found himself sitting in that same tree a week before Bella's wedding. He had come straight from school, backpack and all. It was really pathetic of him to be spying on her, but it was even more pathetic of him when the fact that spying was the only way that he could connect to Bella was calculated in. And he didn't care. If this is what he had to do just to be close to her then so be it.

He sat there for hours watching her come and go from her house, enter and exit her room. He watched her brush her hair. He watched her read a book. He watched her sit outside and enjoy the beautiful Indian summer weather. And he also watched her as Edward stopped by. Jacob growled.

Night had set and Jacob was still sitting in the tree. He was still watching Bella as she enjoyed Edward's company. It was so painful to watch but he forced himself to do so. Soon he wouldn't be seeing Bella anymore. He would have to get over the loss of her company and the loss of what could have been. So he forced himself to sit there so that he could practice living with a broken heart.

Unconsciously he took out a notebook and a pen. Jacob began to compose a letter. He did not think about what he was doing. He just let the words and the feelings flow from his pen.

Bella,

Think about me.

Think about me when you walk up the isle with that bastard Edward.

Think about me when you tell Edward you love him and want to stay with him.

Think about me when you lay your head next to his and say good night.

Think about me when you sit across from him every night at dinner.

Think about me when your thoughts drift to him and you can't find yourself stopping.

Think about US when you run toward the so called man you love with all your heart.

Think about US when you start making a family with HIM.

I want you to think about me. Us. Everything we had. Together.

I don't want you to forget. Even if you do.

I want you to go crazy just thinking about what you COULD have had. With me.

It's a shame.

You left me. For HIM. For what you THINK is love.

You foolish, selfish, childish women that I love to death.

I want you to start dying slowly with pain of leaving me. Leaving us.

Think about me. Think about our lost love. For each other.

I hope you will be happy in the end. If not, it's sad to say, it will be the only chance you have.

But remember, I WILL think of YOU.

I will think of you every time I dream.

I will think of you every time I past our use to be spot on the river bank by the Bella tree.

I will think of you every time I let my eyes close for just a moment.

I will think of you because I love you.

I love you. I love US. But you love HIM.

So I want you to be tortured with thoughts of me. Of us. Of the future we could have had.

Because HE doesn't love YOU. He WON'T think about YOU. Not the way I do. He doesn't see you the way I do.

So think about what we could have had.

Just think for you. For us. For the love we HAD. For what it could have been.

Jacob

In anger he crumpled up the letter and threw it into the darkness. The ink on that paper was pure poison. The words they formed were mean and cruel. Though they spoke only the truth, sometimes the truth should be kept inside ones heart. Sometimes the truth need not be voiced because it is already understood. Bella knew the truth. She didn't need it to be slapped across the face with it. She already had daily reminders of it.

He would be the better man. "Just gotta look on the bright side."

&&&

So how'd ya'll like it? This one-shot is based off of a song. I placed some of the song's lyrics here and there throughout. Can you guess the name of the song? My spine goes to the person who guesses correctly.