Once upon a time, about eleven months ago, I started writing a series of One-Shots involving the Room of Requirement and the humor, scandal, and intrigue surrounding it. What you are about to read was the first of said One-Shots, and involved a concept that made me giggle. It's older than some of my other pieces--and rather short--but still cute. Or I like to think it is, anyway.

Disclaimer - Dude, if I was J.K. Rowling, the scene would have gone down something like this...

The Impossible

I need you to become what you are for Draco Malfoy…

The Room of Requirement, it seemed, had a sense of humor. Just as Harry was about to leave, a door shimmered into the wall. He breathed a sigh of relief, looked right and left to be sure no one was coming, hurried through, and…

Stopped dead in his tracks.

Instead of the sinister lair of plotting and deception he'd expected, a silk cloth splayed across a candlelit table set against a balcony under the stars. To the left sat a comfortable sofa before a roaring fireplace. It seemed the ideal location for a lovers' tryst--which made him wonder if he hadn't quite gotten the wrong room by mistake.

Harry turned to deem this mission a failure and caught sight of a twisting doorknob.

Acting quickly, he threw the invisibility cloak over his shoulders and crept into a dark corner. As the door swung open, the very fiend Harry sought entered.

Malfoy paced for several minutes, glancing at a gold pocket-watch inside his robes before muttering something under his breath and shooting a glower at the door, as though it had offered some personal offense.

Then, at long last, it opened again.

Impossible.

Harry was seeing things. He blinked. Then blinked again. Nothing had changed. Biting back a cough, he forced himself to keep watching.

"Hello, Draco. Am I late?"

The Slytherin sneered. "Yes. Haven't you got enough sickles to buy a watch?"

"Oh no." Her face was serious. "I never use watches. Daddy says they attract--"

"Spare me the details of your newest imaginary friend and sit down." Malfoy rolled his eyes. "I missed lunch today and I'm starving."

Immediately, she placed her hands on her hips. "You really should not skip meals, Draco. It isn't healthy. How do you expect to do well on exams unless you take care of yourself?"

"Sit down, woman."

"Promise you will not skip meals."

He leaned forward to whisper in her ear. "Only if you sit."

This was far beyond puzzling. Harry frowned, trying to think of a reasonable explanation. She couldn't be using him--it wasn't like her. And she was smart enough to know he was up to no good. She was in Ravenclaw, for Merlin's sake!

But then, why else would she be meeting him of all people?

"Will you stop staring at me?" Malfoy had glanced up from his plate, scowling.

She smiled. "Did anyone ever tell you that you are fascinating? I enjoy watching you, Draco."

He raised a fork. "If you do not stop watching me and eat something now, Luna, I swear you won't enjoy what I do to you."

"What would you do?" Her voice seemed eager. And coherent. It made Harry cringe.

A smirk. "For starters, I'd spank you."

"That never did work, you know. The last time you tried…"

Harry's eyes rolled back in a dead faint.

Perhaps it was better that he never found out exactly what happened the last time.

Fin.