A/N: Yaaaay, more Negitoro crack! Well, sort of crack-ish... .w. So, I've been in a COMPLETE block lately. ;-; Sowwyyyy to all the people waiting for me to update, and to One-x-Three for making her wait so long for her birthday present! I hope you had a good time on the actual date, about a month ago. Q-Q And I hope everyone who decides to click this enjoys it!~ (Pssst, it's Len's P.O.V. by the way.)
Hi, I'm Len. I have two older sisters; one is my twin, and the other is 6 years older than I am. My twin is named Rin, and she and I get into trouble a lot, and we TOTALLY don't deserve the punishments! ...Most of the time. So my oldest sister is named Luka, and she's such a jerk. She's ALWAYS the reason Rin and I are ever caught, and just plain sibling rivalry should explain why we don't get along.
And aside from that, I have reason to believe that Luka is a vampire! I'll begin with showing you the data I've gathered with the help of Rin.
Test #1: How does the subject react to the sun?
Rin and I ate our cereal slowly, mine had sliced bananas in it, and she had a sliced orange on a side-plate. "Hey, Len, why are we doing this again?.." She asked me.
"Shh! Just watch and take notes."
"But.. I'm hungry and"-
"SHHH!" We continued waiting for our older sister to come downstairs. Then as I heard her slow, fumbling footsteps, I pulled the curtains open as wide as they would go.
Finally, Luka appeared at the bottom of the steps, completely disheveled in appearance and rubbing her eyes. She walked into the kitchen and immediately threw her arms over her face in pain. "Urghgh, do you guys REALLY need the curtains open so wide?!" She hissed out and pulled the curtains shut as fast as humanly possible. Perhaps even at an inhuman speed, hmm..
She sat down across from us and continued rubbing at her eyes. I leaned over to whisper to Rin, "Did you get something written down?"
"...Huh?" She confusedly looked up. I snatched the notebook to take a look, and on the page was just a bunch of random doodles she'd done when she was supposed to be taking the notes on Luka.
"Dammit Rin! You were supposed to be taking notes!"
"HEY, DON'T CUSS, LEN!" Luka pointed at me with the hand not holding a peach she'd grabbed from the fruit bowl in the center of the table.
I grumbled as I grabbed the pen and scribbled down the notes that Rin was supposed to have written. "Subject L (Luka) seems to react very bitterly to the sun, almost as if it's killing her." "Psst, Rin, test 2 will commence in 5 hours, meet me in the tree house when I give the signal. ...Rin?"
Rin had slumped over the table fast asleep; pretty luckily considering she hadn't flopped onto her cereal bowl. "...Oh well, I'll poke you with a stick or something when I need you."
Test #2: Will garlic harm the subject?
"Alright, Rin, this is the second test."
"...But why did you have to jab me with a stick. I WAS HAVING A VERY NICE DREA-"
"SHH, RIN! Hey, Luka, dad wants you to help us order a pizza for lunch!" I shouted.
I heard her trudge downstairs. She had her cellphone pressed against her ear. "Lily, you're gonna have to do it yourself, I can't ask Miki out for you. ...UGH, alright, I'll help tomorrow, but that's it." She hung up and walked over to us. "Alright guys, hurry up and make a decision, because I have important stuff to do."
"Nee, what kind of important stuff? Is it with Mikuuuuu?" Rin asked teasingly.
Luka blushed. "H-hey, Miku's, umm, she's, urr.. SHUT UP! Anyway, what kind of pizza do you guys want?"
"Hmm, how about garlic white chicken?" I looked over to make sure Rin had her notebook and pen ready.
Luka's nose scrunched up in distaste. "Um, how about get a pepperoni instead?"
I raised an eyebrow and took another brief peek to make sure Rin was getting this down. "And why can't we get the other one?"
"I just don't like garlic that much. So are we agreed on the pepperoni?" Rin and I nodded and took off to meet in the tree house again.
"Pfft, 'doesn't like garlic that much', she's totally a vampire."
"I dunno Len, I still don't really think she's a vampire..." I couldn't believe what my sister was saying! How could she NOT believe that Luka was a vampire?
"But the proof is only adding up! Unless... YOU'RE A VAMPIRE TOO!"
"What?! Alright, I'll believe you, if you show me some ACTUAL proof!"
"You've got a deal! Just you wait, Rin, I'll prove that Luka's a vampire!"
Later that night, we waited for Luka to come back from wherever she'd gone after dinner was done. "Len, this had BETTER be worth it."
"Don't worry, Rin, it will be." After waiting for awhile, Luka finally came through the door. I covered Rin's mouth as she was about to scream. Luka's hands were covered in a sticky red substance, most likely blood. She let out a yawn and walked to the bathroom. After she'd closed the door and we heard the shower start running, I took my hand away from Rin. "Is that enough proof for you? Either she's a murderer or a vampire, take your pick."
"I-I believe you, Len. Sorry for doubting you.."
"It's fine, Rin, but now we have to stop her from killing other people."
"But how?..."
I tapped my chin for a few moments. "...I think I have an idea."
Rin and I were sitting in the livingroom watching some new anime. The doorbell rung, and Luka came sprinting down. "Alright guys, that's Miku, so you better not screw this up or embarrass me, or there will be HELL to pay!" She pointed at both of us before smoothing out her hair and opening the front door. "Hey Miku!~" She greeted cheerily and gave a brief hug before leading the shorter girl in. "It's amazing how quickly she changes moods..."
Soon the two went over to the kitchen for a moment, so I leaned over to Rin. "Do you have the supplies?"
She nodded and pointed at the items she was holding.
"Good, let's sneak up to Luka's room before they go up there." So we quickly tip-toed up to our sister's room, which we'd been forbidden to ever enter. We went into her walk-in closet and shut the door. It was one of the shutter-doors that you could see out of, but no one could see in. "And now, we wait.."
It didn't take long before Luka and Miku came crashing in; Miku had her arms around Luka's neck as they made out with each other. "Ewww, I didn't need to see this."
"Ahhn, Luka, wh-what if one of your family walks in on us?" They clumsily made their way over to the bed, and Luka had Miku sit on her lap.
"It'll be fine, I made sure Rin and Len wouldn't bother us, and my parents are at work." Luka began to lower her lips towards Miku's neck, and that's when I knew we had to do something.
"Rin! We have to help Miku before Luka drinks all her blood!" I whisper-shouted to Rin.
"I've got'cha bro! On 3! 1.. 2.."
"3!" We burst out of the closet; I had the bottle marked 'holy water' in hand that Rin had gotten. "YOU WON'T BE STEALING ANY MORE SOULS!" And I dumped the water over Luka.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO DOING?!" The now soaking wet Luka put Miku off to the side and stood up angrily. To my surprise, the holy water wasn't doing anything! No burns, no screams of pain, no anything!
"OH NO, RIN, THE HOLY WATER ISN'T WORKING! QUICK, GET THE CROSS OUT-"
"Woah, woah, woah, hold on for a minute. "Holy water"? What have you two dorks been watching?!"
"Isn't it obvious, Luka? Or should I say, VAMPIRE LUKA!" I pointed at her accusingly.
"Wha- vampire? Is that what this is all about? Are you guys like, COMPLETELY STUPID OR SOMETHING?!" Luka was only getting angrier, and Miku sat off to the side completely red-faced.
"B-but, in the morning, when the curtains were open-"
"Did it ever occur to you that I'm not, nor have I ever been a morning person?" I stood in silence. It hadn't occurred to me at the time...
"W-well what about the pizza-"
"Like I said, I just don't like garlic." My proof was beginning to fade and disappear as we spoke.
"Ok, but that doesn't explain the blood on your hands last night!"
And then she face-palmed. "Do you seriously ever listen when I'm talking? I mentioned last week that I'm on a volunteer paint committee, that was PAINT not blood."
"...Oh. Hey Rin, wanna go play something on the PC?"
"Um, yeah sure!" And we dashed out of there as fast as we could. When we were far from the room, Rin smacked me across the head.
"OW, what was that for?!"
"I TOLD YOU SHE WASN'T A VAMPIRE!"
"Ugh, Miku, I'm sorry they had to ruin everything.."
Miku chuckled as she wrapped Luka into an embrace. "Don't worry about it, silly!~ Besides, I thought it was kind of cute how innocent they still are.."
Luka gave a small smile. "I suppose you have a point.."
Miku grinned and gave a small kiss on her cheek. "Oh by the way, I figured now would be a good time to tell you that I'm a werewolf and my pack wants me to make you one too otherwise they'll kill both of us."
"Mm, ok sweetie- WAIT, WHAT?"
The eeeend~ Oh my God, what even is this. xD I hope this made you laugh or something, because I honestly have no idea what this even is. Goodbye for now!~ And once again, happy birthdaaaay!