Summary: James & Lily, Year 7. Lily and James confront one of their greatest fears together and are recruited by Dumbledore to be a part of some Order...meanwhile, Sirius ponders the changing tides that seems to have settled over the school. Remus desperately wants to keep his friends away from harm and Peter is still innocent - until...

A/N - This is Hollow's Refuge, the story I started a long time ago. I finally decided to post some of it. The rest is in my computer, waiting for editting.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Harry Potter. This is FAN fiction, no?

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Chapter 1

James finally managed to squeeze the last of his school robes in his trunk which now stood upright beside his bedroom door. He sat on the edge of his bed, head lowered, forehead in palms, resting his elbows on his knees. He was staring intently at the ground, devoting all his concentration on purging his head of those awful thoughts...A loud rapping on the door jolted him from his uneasy trance.

"Er - yeah," he fumbled, "it's open."

Dark eyes, framed with black hair and eyebrows, entered the room. Sirius took special care not to make any noise, slowly letting the door shut, the soft click the only sound heard. He looked troubled, as though he'd just been scolded. He made his way towards James, speaking in a hushed voice. "Are you ready? Packed?" James nodded solemnly. His friend lowered himself down unto the bed, he, too, resting his elbows on his knees, staring ahead at the enchanted picture of a man's head floating towards a snitch (who was James's grandfather playing Quidditch with his invisibility cloak). Sirius' black hair drooped across his face, hindering James' view of his friend. He let his worry wrinkle his brow if only for a short second.

Both boys knew what was on the other's mind. Both knew the other's reaction to what that was. Both failed miserably in their attempts to mask their concern.

"Moony's going to meet us at the Leaky tonight. Wormtail'll show up tomorrow..." James drifted. He knew Sirius knew all this but he didn't know what else to say. They were best friends, hardly had to speak to communicate...they had faced countless dangerous situations, sneaked behind their Headmaster's back to make secret potions, had strutted a forbidden forest with a werewolf. This, however, was something none of the two 17 year olds were ready to face. The danger in walking in the moonlight with a full fledged werewolf seemed a walk on the beach compared to it.

"James, Sirius, we're leaving." James' mother called from behind the door. Her voice was softer than usual, more caring than her usual strict tone she took on to discipline her out of control son and his best friend, who she considered as a son anyway. Both knew she did this in order to cover her pain.

Sirius cast a quick glance at James, who was still holding his head between his hands. "Come on," Sirius grabbed his friend's trunk on the way out, leaving James to grab his cloak and glasses.

"You're not serious?" Remus' face went beyond pale as he watched his two best (usually rambunctious) friends stare blankly ahead, devoid of all emotion. Remus knew that underneath their blank expression, both boys felt the same as he did: unbelieving.

It was James who broke the silence, first by setting his mug on the wooden table, then clearing his throat, and finally sounding almost as confident as he usually was. "Listen, don't you dare think anything will change! We'll still take our usual trips, do what we - "

"Of course!" Sirius cut him off with a wide grin, slapping James heartily on the shoulder. "Nothing'll change!"

"But if you ever feel - " Remus trailed off, satisfied by the look of appreciation on James' face, one that would have gone undetected by any other than the one he aimed it at.

The evening wore on, each boy regaining his usual coolness, slyness, or just plain weirdness. Things were finally beginning to feel like they had last time they'd all been together. Before they fell asleep, however, each boy knew this year would be different from the rest.

"James Potter!" A stern voice bellowed from across the corridor. "Follow me." Professor McGonagall hardly had to pick up her pace to overtake the young Head Boy. He turned sheepishly to his three friends and mouthed 'I'll meet you in the common room'.

The transfigurations teacher brought the young wizard to a small room he'd never noticed before. (He made a mental note of it.) "Potter," she said as she opened the door. James stepped lightly inside, half expecting to be greeted by brooms.

To his surprise, an old silver haired, blue eyed wizard dressed in purple robes greeted him from across the room. He sat at a large mahogany desk littered with large dusty books. The Headmaster raised his head to look through his half-moon spectacles. "James Potter," he started, his voice heavy with wisdom. "Please, sit." A chair appeared from behind James, sweeping him off his feet, bringing him directly in front of the other wizard. "Lemon drops?" Albus Dumbledore never seemed to amaze anyone with how easily he could switch from mood to mood. James refused politely and stared at his headmaster. "James, it has come to my knowledge that you have learned some information this summer that may very well be...troubling, to say the least." James' eyes affirmed all of Dumbledore's suspicions. "I also noticed you've accepted the position of Head Boy. If at any time you feel your duties are too heavy, you may give back your badge."

"I can handle a bit of extra work, Professor. After all the trouble I have caused since I've come here, I don't see why spending a few hours here and there making sure others don't follow in my footsteps wouldn't smooth things over with the entire staff." He pushed his round glasses back up his nose, grinning suspiciously.

Dumbledore smiled and tilted his head so that now, he was looking over his own glasses. "Is there nothing else on your mind you wish to discuss tonight, James?" James squinted his face in mock concentration and after a few minutes of this, shrugged his shoulders and shook his head 'no'. "Very well then. Off you go." His bright blue eyes darted back to the book that lay sprawled on the desktop. "Oh and, just as well James, take extra precaution. These are dark times and I know you and your friends have a certain thirst for bending the rules and I will not appreciate you falling victim to your own, shall we say, troublesome nature." James smiled slightly in thanks and ducked out.

How much does he know? James pondered while heading back to the Gryffindor common room. Surely not about our transformation...Deeply focused on trying to find an answer as to how Dumbledore could have found out, James hardly noticed that he had walked straight into something that felt rather like a someone.

"POTTER! WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, WILL 'YA?" He briefly turned and looked straight into the green menace of Lily Evans' eyes, continuing on his way. Oh Lily, he thought, if only you could finally -

-

He hadn't stopped walking. This caused Lily Evans' cheeks to match her deep red hair. Never before had James casually walked away from her without smiling cockily, shouting a rude remark, or better yet, a self-loving remark. And the next thing shocked her even more: Sirius, James' Siamese twin (everyone could have SWORN they were connected at the hip) had been nowhere in sight. It's not like she cared why his usual self-righteous, self-loving attitude had instantaneously turned into a stiff git...all the better, perhaps he finally had some sense knocked into him. Lily made a mental note to track down whoever did and give them what they deserved.

James stopped dead in his tracks having walked only about seventeen paces away from Lily and spun on his heals heading straight towards her. "Come back to insult me, Potter?" she said, well at least that's what she had planned to say, but he had gripped onto her wrist and led her (against her will) to a corridor far away from prying eyes and ears. When he let go, he had her lean up against the wall (although, to her surprise, he hadn't reached over with his arms as he usually did to try to make himself seem charming). She looked up at him defiantly, glaring into his hazel eyes. "What do you want?" She sighed, knowing the answer.

"Well, you know I'm Head Boy, right?" She swallowed hard. She had hoped it were only a rumour aimed to upset her. Although, it would have explained why no one had shown up to accompany her on the train to attend to Heads duties. She shook her head. "Well, I am, which means I have...hmm, I believe I've got as much authority as you do, so please, if you would be so kind to perhaps stay off my back this year. I'll keep the Marauders under control so long as you stay far away from me - err - us."

Lily, ever since being made a prefect, had had her eyes set on catching James and his three accomplices in action, yet she had failed to do so for two years. They were sneaky, sly, and impossible to predict.

"Aww, Potter, are you finally over your crush?" She didn't let go of eye contact, nor did she want to. She'd look much more threatening by glaring into his eyes than staring at the ground. She put on a mocking sad frown and pretended to cry. "What am I ever to do? James Potter doesn't love me anymore! Wainnh! – "

"Cut it out Lily, I'm not joking. And I'm not...was never in love with you. I was only ahhh, never mind. Just please, is it a deal? Stay away from m… stay away from my friends and me and we won't go looking for trouble. If we're ever in trouble, I solemnly swear that it was after us."

Lily considered his words. They seemed sincere enough, but "How am I to know that you're really not going to get up to any nasty business? Honestly James, we've been going here for what, 7 years, and never once have I heard of such a thing as you making an honest deal with anyone."

He closed his eyes, almost as though explaining anything was too painful for him. "All I can say is that I've errm, grown up (a bit) and I well, you can hold me to my word this time. I lie to teachers to get out of trouble, I lie to some girls to get out of dates but never will I lie to you Evans."

"Curious. Go on," was all she said, a trace of flattery and threat surfacing in her eyes.

"Because in a matter of life or death, Lily Evans, I would like you to live, and if lying to you could get you killed, then I'm sorry but I'm not going to chance it." She opened her mouth to retort an insult but he cut her off by grabbing her hand in handshake, giving it a tug and saying "Done deal." He turned 'round the corner heading back towards the Gryffindor common room. She peeked around the corner, standing fuming yet relieved. This whole deal meant more to her than her knew. If he could keep his mates in check, then her year as Head Girl would be a breeze. He had to keep his word...just had to.

"AND DON'T WORRY EVANS!" He called from the other end of the hall, "I AM A MAN OF MY WORD!" And with that he disappeared.

Well, she thought, at least the Marauders aren't going to be a reason to deduct points from Gryffindor this year. But her mind wandered on a bit of what he had said. "...in a matter of life or death, Lily Evans, I would like you to live..." It sounded serious and whatever it was, Lily couldn't wait to pry it from Peter Pettigrew's tongue. The tables had officially turned in Lily's favour. My, my did she feel rather...sneaky.

-

When James entered the common room, the three boys were there waiting for him at a table in the darkest corner. James hurriedly sat down, hair a mess, glasses crooked, worry creasing his brow.

"Wha' he say, mate?" Sirius asked.

"Dumbledore? Just wanted to know if I was up to the Head Boy business, what with...well you know." Remus and Sirius nodded, Peter followed their example, although he had not yet been told of the present situation.

Sitting around the table planning the major 'outings' of the year, the Marauders lost track of time, and the only reason they slowly dragged their heels up the stairs to their dormitory was because Lily Evans had walked through the portrait hole and had scolded them for being out of their dorm. Of course, keeping up his half of the bargain, James led his mates up the stairs for the night.

Once the door was closed, it was Peter who spoke first, knowing he had been left out of something important and feeling a pang of jealousy that he had. "So, James, what's happening? Why –"

"Sorry Pete, but I don't think you really want me to tell you. I know how you get and Remus, Sirius and I figure it's best that we don't tell you." James slipped under his red covers – the same red as the curtains drawn over the window next to him.

"Aww, but, I promise I won't overreact! Please?" The blond haired boy almost tripped over his own feet.

Sirius cast Remus a look of annoyance, which was not reflected on his friend's face. "He'll annoy us until we tell him." He informed both the scrawny looking Remus and the very distant James. Remus simply shook his head, mumbling that Peter would find out in due time.

"Guys!" Peter interrupted loudly, though Remus and Sirius were still discussing the matter at hand.

"We should be careful about how we do it though," James said wearily, "because we don't want to scare him off, but then again, - "

"I can HEAR YOU, you know!" shouted the red-faced Peter.

"We can't let him think it's nothing," finished Sirius.

"We'll talk about it in potions, mates. Right now, though, we should all get some sleep." Remus pulled his blankets to his chin. Peter had finally given up and, it wasn't long before James heard soft snores coming from his corner of the room. James lay still, pretending to be sleeping while Remus and Sirius quietly argued about something related (James was sure) to rules as applied to exploding snaps. Soon enough, however, Sirius' breathing became deep, constant, and Remus' took on an odd rhythm – two short shallow breaths, one long deep breath, two short, one long – which meant that all in the room – save James – were asleep.

James lay awake, eyes closed yet unable to keep them so for more than a few minutes at a time. He couldn't get his mind off his father – a once tall, strong and intimidating wizard – who had come home with a deep sinking cheeks, dark eye circles, and hands shaking ferociously. His grey eyes had been frightened, instead of exuberating their usual pride and energy. James knew his father was a normal man, perhaps an exceptional wizard but still every bit as mortal as the next, and couldn't help but admire and idolize his father, which was the cause of his unease and alarm. He always figured his father was strong, but seeing him weakened, crying in front of James, his mother and Sirius, shaking hands, quivering body, convinced James that his father was not invincible, and the words he had later whispered to James were to be taken seriously.

Finally, slowly, sleep began to overtake him. He didn't struggle against it for he hadn't slept in many a days, but something inside him did not yet want to drift off. It was Lily. She hated him, of that he was sure, and he knew she was out to catch the Marauders in action, but it wasn't getting in trouble that worried James, it was the trouble Lily could cause onto herself. Death Eater activity had reached an ultimate high. They killed anything that was even remotely connected to Muggles, and…Everyone knew she was Muggle-born, everyone knew she was bright, quick, and had quite the temper, which made her all the better to prey upon if you were a follower of …

The birds of the Forbidden Forest began their soft chirping to welcome the rising sun. It was still dark outside, but the sky would soon take on a light blue glow, which meant the sun would soon be casting its rays onto the castle. James still kept his mind on Lily, however, determined to shake her off this term, to not even stir a slight argument so she would have no reason to stalk around the castle after them. James couldn't help but also feel responsible for the other Marauders. They were his best mates, and if anything should happen to any of them, James didn't think he could handle it. James sighed and rolled onto his side, eyes still closed, mind returning to Lily. He didn't love her, he never did love her, no matter what Sirius said, he was not infatuated by her. He was simply concerned, that was all, that she would be unable to handle the pressures that the world now faced and that evil people – people of the likes of Snivellus Snape – would harm her. Finally, James' muscles relaxed, hand hung from the side of his bed, and mind, with Lily's image still intact – floated off to a distant land.