Author's Note: I was listening to this song and thought that it would be a perfect song for Edmund and Lucy in a slightly AUish setting. I did change one word in the song- I changed 'mother' to 'sister' so it would fit with the story line. Enjoy and let me know what you think!
Ages at beginning: Peter- 21. Susan- 20. Edmund- 18. Lucy- 16.
Disclaimer: I own none of the Pevensies and I don't own the song Supernatural by Flyleaf
Supernatural
Lucy and Edmund-centric Songfic
by Kirsten Erin
Her headaches are constant
Inceasing in pain with each passing day
She can't even manage to stand on her own
It's gotten so bad.
Lucy weakly gripped the railing of the stairs in her London home as she slowly made her way down the stairs. Just keeping herself from collapsing was spending all of her energy, but she felt bad for all the strain she'd put on her family already.
Peter was having to work constantly, along with Dad, in order to pay the hospital bills that her tumor had accumulated. Mum was nearly as tired as she was and was perpetually sleeping in her room, the stress of the situation becoming too much for her to handle.
Susan was trying to escape, she'd leave for parties as much as possible, drowning her sorrows with meaningless laughter and handsome boys. Lucy's heart wrenched as she thought about it. No wonder she was so engulfed in such things, she'd forgotten Aslan and had no one to hold onto anymore.
And then there was Edmund, her knight in shining armor. He was sleeping in their room right now. He'd begged Susan to switch with him so he could keep a constant eye on Lucy. Now Su stared a room with Peter, who was usually gone anyway because of his full-time job that he'd quit University to get.
Lucy knew Edmund was worn out, so she hadn't wanted to wake him up. He'd been keeping a vigilant watch over her and it was taking a toll on his body.
Lucy lowered a shaky foot down to the next step and stumbled, pitching forward as she let out a little shriek. Edmund caught her in an instant, having come up behind her just before her attempt at falling.
"What do you think you're doing, Lu?" he asked groggily as he pulled the small bundle of a girl into his arms. Since she'd gotten sick, she'd lost alot of weight and was nearly skin and bones.
"I just thought I'd get some water." she answered quietly, trying to ignore the dull throbbing of her head that accompanied her every waking moment. "I didn't want to wake you."
"Well, you should have woken me." he answered, chiding her softly.
She could see in his eyes that he didn't have the heart to truly scold her. The sixteen year-old girl cuddled against her eighteen year-old brother's chest as he carried her.
"You cold, Lu?" he asked sweetly.
She only nodded in response.
Laying her down gently on the couch, he pulled a large comforter over her frail body and brushed his lips across her forehead.
"I'll be right back."
When he returned with a glass of water, he helped her sit up to drink it and she sipped at it slowly.
It was then that the door opened to reveal a windblown Susan, bundled to the brim in defense of the cold winter air.
"Where have you been, Susan?" Edmund asked, standing to help her with her coat. She allowed him to do so before she headed over to the fireplace to warm her frostbitten hands.
"Out." was her only answer.
Lucy knew that meant she was probably doing something she didn't want them to know about and shook her head softly as she stared into her half filled glass. She tried to keep from crying as she thought of how much she missed her Gentle sister. Where had the queen in her gone?
Edmund dropped it, not wanting to get into another fight, Lucy guessed. He seemed to be more and more fatigued as the days passed. She felt guilty for it being because of her, but very thankful for her older brother and his tender care of her.
Edmund came back over and sat on a stool beside the couch. After he helped Lucy lay back down, he asked what she wanted to do.
"Let's talk about Narnia." she answered quietly. A genuine, yet weary, smile lit up Edmund's face, reaching to his eyes. It was the first real smile she'd seen since she'd started getting sick six months ago. It only showed up when they talked of Narnia and Aslan now.
Lucy closed her eyes, imagining the countless summers they'd spent riding horses and playing in flower beds, whenever they had the free time. Of course, harsher memories came too. Images of bloodshed, dead Narnians, and constant threats of war and hardship came through with those happy ones.
But they'd always come through rough times by holding onto Aslan.
Lucy sighed, "I miss Him."
"As do I, Lu." he smiled. "I miss seeing him, though I'm glad we can still talk to him here."
Susan jumped up in a huff, looking perterbed. She scowled at Edmund before kissing Lucy on the cheek and heading up the stairs.
"She'll remember." Edmund cooed as he wiped away a tear that was sliding from the corner of Lucy's eye.
"I know, I just miss her too."
And you think of saying
There's no use in praying
But still she bows her head
So she can say
"Thank you for just one more day"
Even Peter had forgotten, under the stress of it all. Lucy had no doubt he would remember once it was all over, but wished she could see him Magnificent again before she died. Sure, he said he still remembered, but Lucy could see it in his eyes- he was fading. He was forgetting how to trust.
Edmund would have to be strong for him, which she didn't doubt he'd be. She just hoped Peter would realize it before Edmund was on the brink of exhaustion.
"I'm thankful for every day I can stay with you all, Ed, but I'll be glad when this ends and I'm with Him again." she told him softly.
It was his turn to shed a few tears.
It was no secret that she was dying. That was the reason that she wasn't at the hospital anymore. There was nothing more that they could do for her there, no more treatment for her. The doctors had told the Pevensies just to make her last days more comfortable. It shouldn't be long now.
Edmund's hand caressed her frail cheek as he let the tears dribble down his face.
"Please, let's not talk of that. I can't- I can't deal with that. Not yet." he told her sadly.
She understood and was secretly glad that she was the one facing death, she didn't think she could handle it if it were one of her siblings instead of herself. She understood that this was breaking their hearts.
"Can we talk to him now, just you and I?" Lucy asked gently.
He simply nodded as they joined hands.
"Dear Aslan," Lucy began. "Thank you so much for giving me this wonderful brother of mine. I don't know what I'd do without him- without any of them. Help them Aslan. I know you're calling me back to your country and I can't wait to dance with you again. Give them the strength to follow your call, even when it's hard." She had tears trekking down her face and even with her eyes closed, could hear Edmund's muffled sobs as he tried to pull himself together. His hands were shaking with the effort.
Lucy looked up at her older brother and waited for him to open his eyes. When he finally did, he held her face in his hands and pressed his forehead against hers before speaking aloud.
"Oh Aslan, I cannot begrudge you for taking Lu away from us. We know you miss her. How can you not? It-It's just that I'm going to miss her too. By the mane, I love her s-so much. Take care of her, will you? You always have."
As he leaned back, she scooted forward in the couch, leaving room enough for him. He took the invitation and snuggled in behind her, wrapping his arms around his frail little sister, not caring when her long hair got in his face. He continued to cry silently until they both fell asleep.
Supernatural patience
Graces her face
And her voice never raises
Lucy woke up slowly as she felt someone's lips brush across her forehead. It was becoming a familiar feeling, but never ceased to light a warm fire in the pit of her belly. It reminded her of just how much her family cared.
Her eyes fluttered open, but she could see nothing yet.
Lucy hated waking up nowadays. What little relief she got from the constant pain came while she slept and when she woke, the sudden onslaught of it was nearly unbearable. She felt her face twist up into a grimace as she worked on blocking out the pain.
When she opened her eyes again, the shapes began to take form and after a few seconds had snapped into focus. Peter was standing worriedly over her.
"I'm sorry, Lu. I didn't mean to wake you." he whispered softly, sitting down on the stool that Edmund had previously occupied.
Lucy could feel Ed's breath on her neck and knew he was still fast asleep. The thought made her smile. He needed it.
"It's alright, Pete. I'm glad you're home. What time is it?"
"Seven." he answered. "Mum's got dinner on the table. Are you feeling up to eating a bit?"
"I'll try." she answered gently. Just then, she felt Ed stir.
"Did you say food?" he asked, shifting slightly.
"Mhmm." Lucy responded, a bright smile gracing her face as she laughed softly.
Peter lifted her from the couch and she wrapped her arms around his neck, thankful for her two brothers that made moving around the house so much less painful.
He gently set her in her chair beside her mum at the white round table that displayed the night's dinner. She'd made chicken broth and Lucy smiled gratefully. The other's took their seats, her dad having gotten home the same time as Peter, and Mr. Pevensie said the prayer.
Lucy studied Peter's face as they prayed, his jaw was set as he glanced up to look at her and finding her eyes open, turned away. She felt her spirit drop a bit with the recognition of that face. It reminded her of the year after they'd returned to England the first time, when Peter had given up on hoping for Aslan. He'd felt betrayed by him.
When the prayer was done, she shared a look with Edmund, silently communicating her displeasure with the way Peter was taking it all. The two youngest Pevensies were experts at reading people, especially their siblings, so it was no surprise that they could communicate so efficiently without words.
"How are you feeling today, Lucy dear?" Mrs. Pevensie asked softly. Lucy looked up to her mother, finding her eyes bloodshot at red-rimmed from crying and reached over to grab her hand.
"I'm alright, Mum." she said, squeezing it quietly before releasing it.
As she let go, she felt Edmund wrap his larger hand around her own, squeezing softly just as she had her mother's. She took comfort in the affectionate embrace, trying to raise her spirits. She couldn't help but feel guilty for the way her family took this all upon themselves.
Lucy took a few spoonfuls of her chicken broth before gagging and putting a hand over her mouth. Peter and Edmund were up out of their seats in heartbeat. Peter ran into the kitchen for a washcloth and Edmund pulled her out of her seat, rushing her to the restroom.
Peter reached them as they were halfway there, holding a trashcan beneath her as she dry heaved and tried to keep back the vomit that was about to ensue.
They managed to reach the toilet in time and Lucy gripped the edges of the seat as her stomach emptied itself. Peter held her hair back and Edmund wiped her face and back with the wet rag Peter had brought.
When she was done, she fell back against Peter, who was currently behind her, with a weak gasp. The boys helped her rinse her mouth before Edmund wiped a lock of hair out of her face.
"Are you okay, Lu?" he asked affectionately, trying to soothe her.
She nodded weakly.
"Do you want to lie on the couch now?"
Again, she nodded.
Peter lifted the small girl into his arms and she smiled softly at the closeness of his warmth.
He lay her on the couch and told her softly that he was going to finish his broth and he'd be back quickly. She understood, he'd done hard work all day and needed his nourishment.
Edmund sat quietly beside her.
"Go eat, Eddie." she told him quietly.
He grabbed a small pillow and lifted her up so that he could sit where her head had just been, then lay her head on the pillow on his lap. He stroked her hair gently, looking down at her with a smile.
"That's alright, Lu. I'd rather stay with you." he answered truthfully.
She almost wished he wouldn't, knowing he needed his nourishment almost as much as Peter did.
"I love you, Ed." was all she could bring herself to say. His smile brightened.
"I love you too, Lu."
All because of a love
Never let go of
Never let go of
Lucy left her family to be with Aslan only a month later.
He has every reason
To throw up his fists in the face of the God
Who let his sister die
Edmund stood, staring numbly at the casket that held the sunny girl who'd brightened every day of his life. Now that she was gone, he wondered if his days would ever be right again.
"How dare the sun shine on such a day." He'd heard Peter grumble on his left.
All Edmund wanted to do now was cry.
Seven months. Lucy had endured seven months of pain and agony, getting weaker every day, and now she was gone.
Through all the prayers and tears
She still passed in pain anyway
Tears streamed down his face and he didn't bother to swat them away. Let others see his pain. Let them see how much he loved his sweet little sister.
He looked to his left and saw Peter holding a weeping Susan, Mr. Pevensie doing the same for a mourning Mrs. Pevensie. Even Eustace was comforting a crying Jill, and Professor Diggory was doing the same for Aunt Polly.
Looking down at his own hands, he balled them into fists to keep himself from breaking down.
Normally, he would be holding a sobbing Lucy, but she was gone and he wouldn't see her again until he was swept off to Aslan's Country in similar fashion. He desperately wished that he could hold his baby sister in his arms just one more time.
Thinking of Aslan, he felt that longing in his heart emerged once again. The longing to feel the breath of the great Lion upon his brow, to hold onto His tawny mane again, to weep be held between His paws as he drowned in sorrow.
He trusted Aslan to his very core, and though he missed his sister dearly, he was thankfully that she was safely nestled in His love now.
As the funeral ended and everyone walked by the casket, Edmund caressed the pale cheek of Lucy's corpse and placed a kiss on her cold forehead.
"I love you, my dear Valiant sister." he told her.
Now you think of saying
There's no use in praying
But still he bows his head so he can say
"Thank you for ending her pain"
Peter and Edmund sat on the latter's bed, staring at the one that lay across from it. The covers on Lucy's bed were still unmade. She'd died in her sleep four nights ago and Edmund had woken to find her that way. No one had touched her things since.
The younger boy leaned his head on his brother's shoulder, taking a deep, rapsy breath.
"Oh Aslan." he said quietly, his heart too distraught to form a deeper prayer.
"Don't bring him into this." Peter said bitterly. Edmund sat up slowly and leaned back to look at his brother.
"What?"
"You heard me!" Peter yelled, jumping off the bed angrily and pointing at Lucy's bed. "Look at what he's taken! He took LUCY! Lucy! How dare he take her away from us?! How dare he make her endure such pain?!"
Peter fell into a heap of sobs and Edmund crawled off of the bed and gathered his eldest sibling in his arms. Whispering comforting words into his hair.
"Aslan took her to a place where she will never feel pain again. She will never cry again, never vomit up what little she's eaten again, never fall down the stairs again, never get another tumor, never pass out from the severity of her pain again. Not ever. He took her to a place that she couldn't be happier to be."
Peter sniffled against Edmund's shirt and looked up at him, reaching out for the hope he saw in his younger brother, his youngest living sibling.
"And one day, we'll go there too. He'll call us all home with a different type of Magic than we're used to. One that's infinitely stronger and this time, we'll stay with Him forever. Don't you want to go to Aslan's Country?" Edmund asked softly.
Peter nodded against his shoulder.
"So did Lucy. And now she's there, with Aslan now. And when it's our turn- we'll get to see her too."
Peter sat up and looked into Edmund's weary eyes.
"When did you get so wise?" he asked affectionately, slowly wiping away the tears that had managed to trek their way down this stubbly face.
"Someone has to keep you in line." Edmund answered laughingly.
Supernatural patience
Graces his face
And his voice never raises
Edmund looked into the mirror, sighing at his bedraggled appearance. Dark bags weigh down his eyes and his hair is severely unkept. He's lost weight in this whole ordeal and looked quite sickly.
He closes his eyes as he splashes his face with cool, soothing water.
He went downstairs and made some warm tea before settling down by the fire.
He stared at the dancing flames, remembering times when he would sit by Lucy as Mr. Tumnus told stories and then played songs that made those flames take forms. He would sit in awe as those stories he'd been told came to life before his eyes.
"Eddie?" Peter's groggy voice came from behind him.
Edmund didn't respond, he only kept his burning eyes fixed on the fire before him.
Feeling something warm wrap around his shoulders, he saw that Peter had placed a blanket on his back and was now sitting down beside him.
"I made more tea if you want some." Edmund told him. Peter shook his head quietly before wrapping his arms around his little brother and pulling him into his chest.
"You've taken care of us all. Let me take care of you now." he whispered into the coal-headed youth's shaggy hair.
This was enough to break down Edmund's defenses. His shoulders began to heave as he wept into his chest. Peter rocked the eighteen year-old back and forth, humming a Narnian ballad softly until he stopped and his breathing evened out.
Realizing his brother was asleep, he leaned his back against an armchair and lost himself to the memories as he watched the flames in their flickering dance.
All because of a love
Never let go of
Never let go of
A year passed and the Pevensies learned to deal with the loss of their little ray of sunshine. Still, the hole throbbed with her absence and all wished desperately to see her again.
He is teaching me
What love really means
Edmund put on his coat and hat, yelling for Peter to get his butt moving.
"I'm coming, Ed. I'm coming!" he called, annoyed as he struggled in his room to get his boots on. Edmund laughed as he heard a crash indicaing Peter'd fallen into something.
"I'm okay!"
"And where are you two off to?" Susan asked the bundled up nineteen year-old.
"We're going off to help Eustace and Jill get back into Narnia by using the rings that got Professor Kirke and Aunt Polly there in the first place. You can come with us if you want." Edmund told her blatantly.
"I leave such fairytales where they belong- in my memory." she told him explicitly, leaving no room for argument. "Go on. Act like children, but don't drag me into it."
He shook his head softly, knowing she wouldn't be so adamant about their time in Narnia being a game if she weren't trying to convince herself as well.
He reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder.
"You'll remember one day, Su." he told her gently before pulling her into a hug. "I'll see you when we get back. May the Lion be with you!" he called as he stole out the door before she could argue.
Edmund saw her annoyed face through the window and chuckled softly as he kicked at the snow that blocked his path.
He shivered involuntarily, refusing to let his mind wander back to his time with Jadis and her cruel treatment of him. He still had nightmares on particularly cold nights. It was then that he thanked Aslan that he had at least let him have his brother with him.
He sighed as he picked up a handful of snow. Lucy would've had this yard spectacularly decorated with wreaths and snowmen and snow angels galore, had she been here. She was the only one who could manage to coax him out into the snow voluntarily. Even Peter couldn't get him to play in it without her help.
"Remembering Lucy?" Peter said behind him, causing Edmund to jump and drop the handful of snow he'd gathered.
Edmund nodded, not bothering to speak as he followed his older brother down the street.
"What did you say to Susan that made her look so uneasy?" Peter asked. "She looked almost worried."
"Just told her she'd remember Narnia." Edmund shrugged. "Did you say goodbye?"
"'Course I did. I kissed her cheek and told her I loved her." Peter responded.
The two walked on in silence.
"How long do you suppose it'll be before we see her again?" Edmund asked after a few moments.
"Who? Susan?"
"No. Lu."
"Oh." Peter said quietly. "I don't rightly know. All in Aslan's timing, I suppose."
Supernatural patience
Graces his face and his voice never raises
All because of a love
Never let go of
"I don't want to freak you out." Edmund said as he sat on the train, fidgeting with the box that held the four rings. The others ought to be getting on a train of their own right about now and the boys would get back just in time to see theirs come in.
"What's that, Ed?" Peter asked, tearing his eyes away from the scenery speeding past them.
"Well, before Lucy went to Aslan's Country, she told me once that she could feel the Deep Magic pulling her back. Only this time it seemed more powerful and felt different." Edmund said lamely.
He didn't know how to go on with what he was wanting to say.
How could he break it to his older brother? Edmund felt scared, scared that he would leave Peter all alone.
"I-I think I know what she means." Peter said quietly, tripping slightly over his words.
Edmund's head shot up.
"What did you say?"
Peter bit his lip, not wanting to look his little brother in the face. Edmund could see he was battling with his emotions and probably losing, as the High King often did.
"I feel the Deep Magic and I hear Aslan calling me." he said even quieter, looking down and letting a tear slip down his cheek. "I'm sorry, Ed. I'll hold on as long as I can. I don't know what it means or how soon he'll actually take me, but I'll try. I'll try to stay." he mumbled apologetically.
Edmund let out a sigh of relief that caught Peter by surprise. His head shot up this time and he looked at Edmund with cautious curiosity in his eyes.
"Why does that relieve you, brother?" he asked with slight suspicion.
"Because I feel it too." Edmund said, smile getting brighter than it had been in a long while. "I didn't recognize it at first, but I pinned it down when we got the the Ketterley house and since then I've been battling with how to tell you. I was worried that I'd leave you behind."
"And I you." Peter laughed.
It was odd, then, how the mood had considerably lightened. Both boys felt a lightness that they hadn't felt since before Lucy had gotten sick a little over a year and a half ago.
Yes, supernatural patience
Graces his face and his voice never raises
All because of a love
Never let go of
Never let go of
Susan slumped back in her chair in the living room, desperately longing for the words on the paper to be wrong. It had to be a lie. It just had to be some sort of sick practical joke.
But no... she'd seen the wreckage herself. Edmund had said he was going there.
She wondered if getting hit by a train hurt terribly or if he'd died instantly.
Peter.
Edmund.
Mum.
Dad.
Eustace.
Jill.
Professor Kirke.
Aunt Polly.
They were all gone now. Just like Lucy.
She crumpled up the page and threw it in the fire.
"This is all your fault!" she screamed, looking up at the ceiling. "You took them away from me! You took them away!"
She sobbed gently, arms hugging her knees as she lay her forehead upon them, repeating the words in an attempt to soothe her soul.
She wasn't sure how long she stayed like that, but when she felt she'd quite run out of tears, she wiped her nose with the back of her sleeve and curled up into the fetal position in the oversized chair. She watched the dancing flames wrap around one another in an intricate dance. She pictured each of their faces, smiling and full of laughter.
The last face she pictured wasn't a person at all, not a human anyway, it was a great Lion. One that had haunted her dreams with his powerful roar.
"Will you dance with me, daughter?" she head a gentle whisper speak.
Susan sniffled as she sat up, looking around for the source of the voice. It was a voice she knew well, one she'd hidden in the deepest corners of her heart.
"Will you dance with me, daughter?" He asked again.
Susan hesitated for only a moment before she fell to her knees in front of the fire, sobbing renewed as her hair fell about her face.
"Yes, Aslan. I remember. I'll dance with you." she called softly.
"Remember." He whispered, the voice fading slowly.
Susan took a deep breath as she leaned back against the front of the chair and stared at the flames again.
This time, new faces flashed before her mind. Narnians.
She smiled as she lost herself in the memories of ruling with her siblings in a certain castle in a country that sparkled in the springtime.
He is teaching me
What love really means
When Susan was taken to Aslan's Country a few years later after her car was hit head on, one might say that the celebration that took place was almost as bright as the smiles that filled the faces of her three royal siblings and the Great Lion himself.