The pain is equivalent to being stabbed a thousand times.
Traumatising is what the experience has been. Emotionally, every aspect of me has been destroyed. It is unknown how much more I will be able to take. Every death I've had to live through, every heart attack inducing moment, everything. Never again will I be able to think of that one day without questioning my surroundings, never again will I be able to hear that one song without breaking down.
My life has been altered in a way that cannot be reversed, and I am forced to question the one choice that threw me into this.
Maybe I shouldn't have watched Supernatural.