Author's Note: Before you read, please understand that I am officially out of it right now. I have been practicing clarinet for this crazy audition and the stress tends to take a toll on my brain. Also, I think every author needs to write a crazy, non-serious story just because. Anywho, if you haven't seen Toby Turner's song "I Can Swing My Sword" then this whole thing won't make sense. Hooplah.
As Sonya stared down the large dragon in front of her, she loosely swung her sword, gauging the perfect strike to kill the beast.
The bystanders nearby urged the Dragonborn to slay the creature before it destroyed their village.
She thought a moment more before a thought struck her.
She looked down at her hand, amazed, and slowly brought it in front of her eyes.
"I can swing my sword," she whispered.
The dragon stopped its advance and tilted its head to catch her words.
"What are you doing? Kill it!" yelled a townsman.
The Khajiit turned, a smile slowly stretching across her face.
"It's okay. I got this!" she yelled back.
She turned towards the dragon and began to madly swing her sword with no regard to where it might strike.
"I CAN SWING MY SWORD!" she sang at the top of her lungs, wildly dancing around the dragon.
She managed to nick the dragon a few times, and it turned to face her in battle. The dragon, however, was greeted with the steel of the swinging blade, and it hissed in pain, sending flames to scorch his opponent.
The cat obliviously marched on, bellowing the strange song at the top of her lungs, as she shut her eyes and followed the sounds of the dragon.
"Cause I am the lord, LORD, lord of swinging swords, SWORDS!"
The dragon, overcome with pain at the nauseating tune, took the skies.
"Oh, no you don't!" yelled the Khajiit, grabbing her bow and firing a volley of arrows at the creature.
The dragon shrieked as it fell to the ground in a heap, and Sonya stood proudly in front of it, leaning on her trusty sword.
She absorbed the dragon soul (as usual) and waited for the "oh's" and "ah's" of the people.
"What was that?" whispered a Nord.
"Oh nothing," the Khajiit replied casually, dusting a speck of dirt off of her armor. "Just absorbing a dragon soul. No big deal."
The Nord shook his head.
"No. That song. What was it?"
The Khajiit stood, confused.
"Wait. The song?"
"Aye," replied the man.
"Erm… I can swing my sword?" she offered.
"Oh, may the bards remember this day and sing this tune, for no dragon can stand to hear it! Hail, Dragonborn! You have saved the day!"
And so the College of Bards adopted the tune and required all students to learn it so it may be sung throughout the nation.
And thus the dragons were quelled.
The End.
Author's Note: You don't understand. I'm out of it. Completely. And just for the record, I think the tune is quite catchy, but I figured a dragon might not like it so much. Oh, the ideas that spawn from my brain...