A/N: So, I wasn't even planning on making a sequel for "Plan B" but you guys asked for it, and well I had the time to write it, so here it is! I hope you like it :p
Also, we should all go and thank Kelsey again because she's the best unofficial Beta ever 3
Now, go ahead and enjoy! :D
Cross my Heart
As soon as Rachel gets out of Quinn's car, she walks as fast as she can toward her house. She stands right in front of the door and quickly wipes her eyes taking a shuddering deep breath, trying to calm herself down to avoid the questions her dads might have.
She makes it to the foyer before Leroy walks up behind her and quietly asks, "Where were you?"
He sounds concerned, but Rachel can't find it in herself to care. The only thing she wants is to go back to her room and lie under the covers so she can drown the guilt that's slowly creeping up her body.
"I went for a ride with Quinn." Her voice is emotionless; robotic.
Leroy purses his lips and carefully studies her expression for a second before saying, "Finn called."
Rachel feels her stomach clench and her bottom lip begins to tremble as soon as she hears her fiancé's name. But she knows she can't break down in front of her daddy. She needs to hold it in and be strong because she has no idea how to explain what just happened.
After taking another deep breath she whispers, "What did he want?"
"He was wondering where you were, because apparently he called you several times and you didn't pick up. Honey, is everything okay?"
No. Nothing is okay. I just had sex with Quinn Fabray, daddy. How can things be okay?
"Yes, Daddy. I just want to go back to bed. I have to get up early tomorrow." She hugs him and Leroy gently holds her, and he has no idea that his embrace is the only thing that's keeping Rachel together.
"Goodnight baby girl."
"Goodnight daddy."
Rachel pulls away from him and she slowly walks back to her bedroom. Once she's inside she locks the door and leans back against it.
Her phone buzzes in her hand. It's a text from Finn.
hey! called u be4 and u didn't pick up. everything ok?
Rachel has always hated the fact that Finn can't take the time to type out all the words or use proper grammar whenever he texts her, but she knows he'll never change. So she heavily sighs and responds: Sorry, I didn't hear the phone ring. Do you need something?
She doesn't intend to sound rude but she can't help it.
The reply comes back quickly: Uh… I 4got 2 ask u if u wanted me 2 pick u up in the morning so we can go 2 school 2gether. U can answer in the morning if u wanna! Sweet dreams rach. love u!
Rachel closes her eyes as she begins to slide down against her door, until she's sitting with her legs crossed. That's when the tears begin to stream down her face. She deletes the message so that the screen will stop mocking her, reminding her of what she just did. She doesn't want to see Finn. But it's not like she can run away and everything will be alright. If there's something Rachel Berry is good at, it's swallowing the pain she's feeling and fighting for the things she loves. And she knows she loves Finn.
Right?
She shakes her head. Of course I do! What kind of question is that? What happened with… Quinn was just a moment of weakness, and don't we all have those kinds of moments?
She knows that the answer is no, but of course she doesn't want to think that way. She feels so guilty because it's the day before her wedding, a wedding she wasn't even sure she wanted. She accepted the proposal because she knew Finn wanted something real that wouldn't go away, so he wouldn't feel like such a failure, and she wanted to help him feel better. And now, it's too late to break the promise she made.
Well that sounds horrible. Is that really why I decided to get married? But— what happened to the Rachel who fought for what she wanted? I'm not that girl anymore. When did that change…? And why can't I get Quinn out of my mind?!
Even though she's trying really hard not to, the only thing she can focus on is Quinn. The way their mouths connected perfectly, like they were shaped for each other.
The way Quinn's hands felt on her skin; so sure and so warm.
But the thing that's piercing her heart the most is the way Quinn held her after she whispered the lyrics of the song –their song- in her ear.
Rachel had never felt so protected and loved by anyone else, only from a simple hug. Not even Finn hugged her that way.
She's sobbing so hard, she needs to breathe with her mouth open.
Why am I still comparing them? Finn is my fiancé. He's perfect for me, and Quinn is… Quinn is my friend. Kind of.
She decides she can't see Finn in the morning because she needs more time to gather up the courage to be able to look in his eyes without feeling so damn guilty.
So she quickly types a reply: I'm so sorry. I can't.
She hits send, and doesn't even notice that she sent it to another number, and that she just broke someone's heart.
…
Wedding Day, 3:45 a.m.
Fabray Residence.
Quinn's phone rings for what feels like the hundredth time and she reaches over to turn it off. She hasn't been able to sleep at all and everything that happened tonight is still haunting her, and the fact that she broke into the liquor cabinet, grabbed a bottle of tequila and spent the last hours drinking, isn't helping.
She knows she won't even have the strength to get up and drive herself to school because she'll see Rachel and she's just not ready to feel her heart shatter again. So she simply rolls on her side and covers her head with a pillow, waiting for sleep to overcome her.
Not even ten minutes later, she hears something trying to throw down her door. Or maybe it was just a knock.
"Go away," she mutters.
They giggle the knob but the door is locked. "Get your lazy ass out of bed and open the door right now."
Quinn freezes at the sound of Santana's voice. She sighs and slowly makes her way to the door, unlocks it and goes back to bed.
Santana opens the door and walks in with her hands on her hips. "Well good morning to you too, bitch."
Quinn doesn't even bother to respond. She only waves a hand so Santana knows that she's not being ignored.
"Well what do we have here? Are you sick Q?" she slowly walks to the side that Quinn is facing, stops right in front of her, and then leans closer. "You're drunk," she whispers, more to herself than anything.
Quinn's eyes narrow as she turns to look at her best friend. "I'm fine Santana. Leave me alone."
"No can do. Your mom called me to ask me when you were coming home. I assumed you told her you were going over to my place, which you didn't, so I had to tell her that yes, you had left a few minutes ago and that you'd be home in a few." She looks into Quinn's eyes. "But she calls me again a few minutes later to tell me that you had arrived looking like you'd run over a fucking puppy and locked yourself in your room."
Quinn considers kicking Santana out of her room, because she doesn't want to talk to her or see her, but then Santana crawls over her until she's lying by her side in the bed, so she stays silent.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Talk to me, Q."
Quinn closes her eyes as she feels Santana hug her from behind.
"Please?"
Santana's voice is barely above a whisper, but Quinn can hear her perfectly and that one word, the pleading tone, is what breaks through her walls.
She turns around and grabs Santana's neck, clinging to her like a child.
"I love her San. I love her so much."
Santana doesn't have to ask who she's talking about. "Shhh, I know you do. But calm down and tell me what happened." she gently strokes Quinn's hair while whispering soothing words into her ear.
"I went to her house to- to talk to her. But I- I kidnapped her and drove her somewhere private."
"You wanted to talk her out of the wedding?"
"Yeah. But I knew she wouldn't listen, San. I just wanted to tell her that I love her. When I did, she laughed at me."
"So…"
Quinn pulls back from the embrace so she can wipe a stray tear and she quietly says, "We made love."
Santana freezes and her mouth drops open. "No fucking way."
Quinn giggles a little at this. "Stop swearing San. It's not good."
"Don't tell me what to do, bitch." Santana responds, smiling a little.
Quinn rubs her eyes, making her look even more child-like, and then she says, "It was perfect. All I've ever dreamed of, but she's still gonna marry Finn."
"Oh, hell no!" Santana stands up and walks over to Quinn's closet to grab a blanket.
"What are you doing?"
"Babe, let me tell you something. Friends don't let friends make love to them. " she walks back to Quinn's bed and throws the blanket over both of them. "Do you see what I'm saying?"
"Uh no, not really."
"Look, if you kidnapped me to gets your mack on in a car, I'd beat the crap out of you."
Quinn turns to look at her with her eyebrow raised.
"Hey now, don't give me the eyebrow. I mean that I wouldn't want to gets my mack on with you because we're friends. Get it now?"
Quinn tries to work around the alcohol-induced haze in her head, and she understands what Santana is talking about.
If Rachel were merely her friend, she would have done something to stop her from kissing and touching her.
But she didn't. She made no move to stop her, or to try to run away. On top of everything, she said Quinn's name as she came undone.
That had to mean something, right?
Quinn really hoped so because she needed something to hold on to, so she could be able to get through the day.
"Do you- Do you think she loves me back?"
Santana smiles at her. "She's taken care of you for more than you can remember; ignoring the rude things you've done and said to her. And have you noticed the way she stares at you Fabray? I sure don't look at you like you're heaven sent."
Is it really possible? Can Rachel actually feel something towards me?
"I think she loves you back, but she's too scared to admit it to herself Q. That or she's being really stupid."
Quinn's vacant expression slowly transforms into a broad grin, lighting up her eyes and making her heart pound with excitement.
"I have to go see her again, San." She tries to get up but Santana holds her back.
"Uh, no, Romeo. You need to get some sleep and think of a plan if you're gonna go all Taylor Swift on her."
"But I-"
"Shut up and sleep. You won't even remember half of what you just told me anyway, so I'll just have to remind you what happened. Go back to bed. I'll think of something."
Quinn turns to look at her best friend, wondering when it was that they got so close and she smiles warmly. "Thanks S. I love you."
Santana rolls her eyes. "Don't thank me, I haven't even done anything. And yes, I love you too. But don't make me repeat it or I'll kick your ass, Fabray."
They smile at each other and Quinn finally feels herself falling asleep, and she quietly thanks God for giving her a second chance.
…
12:00 p.m.
McKinley High
"Rachel? Are you feeling okay, sweetie? You haven't said a word all day."
"And that's weird, especially for you."
Kurt and Blaine sit directly across from Rachel in the cafeteria.
She snaps out of her reverie and looks at them as if she doesn't remember how she got there in the first place. "Yes I'm fine. I'm just… nervous I guess."
Kurt turns to look at Blaine, who looks right back.
"Are you… sure? Is there something we can do to help?"
Rachel sighs heavily. "No one can help me right now Kurt, but I appreciate your concern. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go… drown in a toilet or something." She gets up and exits the cafeteria, leaving her bag behind.
She's been avoiding people all day, including Finn. She still feels guilty and she wonders how long the feeling is going to last. So instead of confronting him, she's trying to put off seeing him until the wedding.
Five more hours until you become Mrs. Hudson. She snorts.
What's curious is that she hasn't seen Quinn either. Maybe they're just taking turns to avoid each other, but Rachel feels like she needs her friend by her side in a moment like this.
Yeah, but how can you go looking for your friend, when she's the one that's making you feel like crap?
"It just doesn't make sense" she whispers to herself, as she walks past the library, unaware that Quinn and Santana are sitting inside.
4:00 p.m.
Road to the Chapel
She's sitting in the back seat of Hiram's car, looking out the window at the sunny weather and the dry road. It feels like time is slowing down, but maybe it's because she seems to be dreading something.
The moment when she says, "I do."
Her dad stops at an intersection and looks both ways, as he always does, and then he looks at her through the rear view mirror and smiles.
"You okay baby girl? You seem a little tense."
She tries to smile back, but maybe it looks more like a grimace. "I'm fine, Dad. Just… nervous."
"Well I bet you are. You're about to get married, Rach. And you know it's not only for a day. You chose Finn to spend the rest of your life with him, and the rest of your life starts today. I'd be nervous too." He turns to look at his husband with a kind smile.
The words sink in and Rachel feels her stomach churn. The rest of your life.
What if…
The rest of her thought gets interrupted as they arrive at the chapel.
She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes, to rid herself of any doubts and to prepare herself for what's to come.
But as soon as she closes her eyes, all she can see is Quinn.
You have to stop Rachel. You're getting married to Finn and you've already hurt him too much. Clear your mind and get in there. Say 'I do' to the man of your dreams.
4:55 p.m.
Long road to ruin…
Rachel takes her first steps inside the chapel, already wearing her dress and holding a bouquet. She can feel herself shaking, but she keeps telling herself she's just nervous.
She's still not sure if Quinn will make it to the wedding, but she needs her to be there by her side.
Step after step, she makes it all the way to the hall, where she finds Finn waiting for her.
As soon as she stops, he turns to look at her.
She tries to smile at him, but she fails.
Finn is babbling something about her looking… some way or another but she can't hear him properly. Until he says something about not getting a reply to last night's text.
Before she can utter a single word, her phone buzzes.
She interrupts whatever Finn was saying. "Oh, it's Quinn, sorry."
Ran home to get my bridesmaids dress. Be there soon.
Rachel's heart begins to pound inside her chest. She's coming. She's actually coming. I need time. I need to think.
"Uh, Rach? Are you okay?" Finn nervously asks.
"What? Yes, of course. I just… want Quinn to get here soon."
"Oh. She'll be here." He doesn't sound too happy about that, but he smiles at her anyway, and he grabs her hand to pull her towards the little waiting room.
Rachel begins to pace from one side of the room to the other and she notices Santana staring at her with an unreadable expression on her face.
Ever so slowly, Santana shakes her head.
Rachel looks into a pair of brown eyes and she feels her fears explode inside of her. It's as if Santana is making her see all the things she's been trying so hard to hide.
What if she is too young to get married? What if she doesn't want to spend the rest of her life with Finn? What if… what if she actually does have feelings for Quinn?
Rachel remembers the way Quinn had told her that she loved her, and how she had laughed as if she didn't believe it. It had all seemed too good to be true.
Quinn Fabray, cheerleader Quinn Fabray couldn't be in love with her. She couldn't even accept that they were really friends! So how could she claim to be in love with Rachel?
But she made love to you Rachel. She took care of you the way no one ever has. You feel something towards her. You do.
Rachel can feel the guilt boiling in her stomach turn to something else. Some kind of urgency she hadn't felt before.
She sends Quinn a text.
HURRY
I can't have feelings for Quinn. She's… Quinn is too perfect. Too good.
She turns back to look at Santana, who's still staring at her. She silently begs for a sign, something that makes her understand that what happened between Quinn and her was real and not just a scheme to make her quit her wedding and set Finn free.
She can try to convince herself all she wants, and lie to herself saying she really wants to marry Finn, but she doesn't. She'll never be happy with a guy who doesn't even remember the most basic details about her. A guy who doesn't really know her, because he's never listened to what she's had to say. A guy who has the need to ask her what she's feeling because his thick head never seems to grasp her mood swings.
She can't marry Finn because she doesn't love him; only the idea of him.
"Rachel we gotta go right now or we'll lose our slot." it's Finn.
"Can we please just wait a couple more minutes for Quinn? Please."
"It's now or never."
Instead of answering she sends Quinn yet another text.
WHERE ARE YOU?
Rachel wants to run away and find Quinn because she needs to look into her eyes one more time and be sure of what she thinks. She desperately turns to look at Santana. She still needs her sign.
Santana looks straight into Rachel's eyes and soundlessly mouths the words: She loves you.
And Rachel knows it's true. She doesn't need to ask anything, or hear the words out loud because she knows they're true. She's known all along, and it explains everything she's felt in the past three years.
All the fights, all those times she couldn't feel angry at Quinn, all those nights she spent crying herself to sleep over the idea that Quinn despised her.
She has feelings for Quinn. She always has.
She's finally made her choice. She's not going to get married.
The realization hits her heart like a speeding truck.
...
One week later
You know that moment at night, where you're thinking so much about something and you start to fall asleep and then you can't tell if you're dreaming or if it's real?
Quinn has been feeling like that for quite a while now.
She can't move, or talk, but she can hear. And her mind is doing quite a lot of talking.
There are a couple of things stuck in her head that she can't quite comprehend.
First of all, she thinks she heard Rachel tell her that she's in love with her. See, she doesn't think that's possible because as far as everyone knows, they're kind-of friends.
Second, besides hearing her talking, she's heard Rachel sing. That would be nice. A couple of serenades just for her. But what would Rachel be doing here… wherever Quinn is? It doesn't make sense.
She's also been hearing a beeping noise somewhere around her, and it's starting to annoy her.
Where the hell am I? Why can't I move?
Her thoughts are interrupted by the voice of an angel. Or at least that's what it seems like to her…
I can't stand to see your eyes
when they're aiming at the floor
But the worst is knowing
I'm the reason for your bitter heart.
Wait a second. That's Rachel's voice.
And with my head in my hands
I'm thinking of the things I've done, so wrong.
Though it's what I deserve,
never take the melody from my song.
Why is Rachel singing a song from a band that only Quinn knows about?
Wait, why is Rachel even singing?
'Cause you're a lullaby
playing through the tragedy
that I listen for to brighten up
the dark that's been romancing
and keeping us asleep
Quinn wants to open her eyes to see Rachel and personally ask her why she's singing, and she wants to see where she is. She tries so hard to open her eyes but they feel heavy.
So now the quiet came around
found a soul muted deeper than its own.
And all the luggage piled in the room
he knows he's gonna have to stay for a while.
Her hand twitches and her right eye opens a fraction. She can see Rachel's figure leaning against her bed. She seems to be crying, and the sight sends a jolt through her stomach because she's never liked to see Rachel cry.
It makes her want to cry too.
And with my feet on the ground
I wonder how I'm gonna escape from the flood
though it's what I deserve
I never want to have to decide to give up
While everything is wandering
away from our reality
She finally manages to open both of her eyes and turn to fully look at Rachel.
That's when she notices where she is.
"Hospital beds have never exactly been comfy, have they?" she whispers.
Rachel abruptly stops singing and she turns to look at Quinn with wide eyes.
"QUINN!"
"Hi."
"Oh my- You're awake! Are you feeling okay? Are you in pain? Should I go call a nurse?" she wildly turns from one side to the other as if trying to decide which way to go. "Oh what am I saying! Of course you need a nurse! I'll be right back, I just—"
Quinn interrupts her. "No, please stay."
Rachel, who's already halfway across Quinn's room, turns to look at her and without a word she walks back to Quinn's side.
"What happened to me?"
"You had an accident. A- truck crashed into your car and you got really hurt."
Quinn tries to remember something about that accident but she can't. "Am I okay?"
She can see Rachel turning away, and she knows she's not completely okay. But she's alive.
"You won't be able to move your legs for a while."
Quinn feels dread filling her stomach, but she tries to let it go, because she's here, breathing and talking to Rachel and it's all that she can focus on. "How long have you been here?"
"Almost a week. I wanted to be here when you woke up."
"Thank you, Rach. It means a lot to me."
"No don't thank me Quinn I- I'm so sorry. It was all my fault because I never should have sent you that text and—"
"Whoa, whoa! What are you talking about? It's not your fault, Rach. Whatever happened, I'm sure it was my fault. Don't blame this on yourself. Please."
Rachel looks devastated and the only thing Quinn wants is to embrace her and make her feel better.
"I'm the one who should apologize for… what I did to you. I never should have kidnapped you and… you know."
"Actually, I wanted to thank you for that."
"Okay, this medicine is quite strong isn't it. Because I think you just thanked me. Or am I still asleep?" it's the only way she can explain what she just heard, because the last time she heard from Rachel, she told her that she couldn't love her back.
"No, you're awake and I did thank you. You helped me realize how big my mistake was and how much I would have… ruined my life. So thank you."
Her eyes seem sincere, and Quinn feels tingles all over her upper body.
"So you… didn't get married?"
Rachel shakes her head. "I called of the wedding after I sent you the last text." Her eyes grow wide again as she quickly says, "About the other text I sent you, the one where I said I couldn't and that I was sorry? It wasn't for you. I messed up the number and sent it to you instead of Finn…"
"Uh…"
"But never mind that," She takes a quick breath. "Everything that happened helped me realize that I don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone who doesn't understand me."
It's everything Quinn has been telling her all along, and she finally realized it. It's the best thing she's heard in a while, so she smiles.
"But I also realized something else." Rachel is grinning, so Quinn assumes it's something good.
She still has the need to ask. "What is it?"
Rachel looks into her eyes and times stops. She feels something pulling her in to who knows what. It's the place where she wants to get lost. It feels like home.
"I realized I'm in love with someone, and it's not Finn."
Those long eyelashes flutter and Quinn holds her breath as she waits to hear a name.
Rachel grabs her hand and she entangles their fingers.
"I'm in love with you Quinn."
Rachel is still talking, but Quinn doesn't need to hear anything else. Rachel just told her that she's in love. With her. She stayed here in the hospital, waiting for Quinn to wake up, and apparently, she sang to her every single day.
She feels her heart burst with excitement. "Rachel is this- Are you sure?"
Instead of answering, Rachel leans in and captures Quinn's lips in a soft, tender kiss.
"Is that clear enough?"
Quinn softly laughs. "Almost."
"I want us to be together. I want to spend time with you and talk about everything without really talking about anything. I want to show you just how much I love you, Quinn. But we need to talk first."
"Okay, I'll talk whenever you want to talk."
Rachel smiles warmly at her and squeezes her hand. "I promise we will talk, but right now you need to rest. I'll be here when you wake up."
"Promise?"
"Cross my heart."
Quinn smiles one last time before drifting off to sleep once more, feeling all the empty spaces inside of her get filled with Rachel's love.
See, I'm not such a bad person after all! Haha thanks for reading and you know I love reviews :3
The song I used was "Asleep" by States. If you haven't heard that band, I suggest you do. Mindy White has such a nice voice and this song always manages to give me Faberry feels.