Operation: N.U.R.S.E
Nigel. Ultimately. Recruits. Sweet. Eccentric
"Here's a new order for you: stop being such an air-head!"
Kuki's lip trembled as she stood still and her arms tightened around her rainbow monkey. She buried her face into the plush, walking in the opposite direction and letting the material absorb her tears. Her superior's words bounced around in her head and she found it harder to shake it off this time.
She wasn't being an air-head!
Or at least, she didn't mean to be.
It was just poor Numbuh One Fifty-Eight looked so down all day (having a broken leg would do that) and that butterfly seemed to be the only thing that gave her a smile. Ever eager to cheer her patient up, Kuki took off after the little creature, aiming to contain it and bring it back to One Fifty-Eight's bedside. With such a cute little friend 24/7, the girl would never feel sad again.
Everything was going so well until she returned to an angry Numbuh First Aid. In her excitement, Kuki forgot she left One Fifty-Eight unattended for the better part of an hour. During her shift, no less.
Oops.
Kuki found a bench as far away from the hustle and bustle of the Medical Boo-Boo Grove as possible and plopped down. The girl squeezed her rainbow monkey and let its vibes of care and love wash away all the nasty feelings mean ol' Numbuh First Aid brought forth.
She wasn't an air-head, she was only trying to make her patient feel better.
That's what she always tried to do.
Only, it seemed every time she did, she seemed to miss a lot of her shifts, and First-Aid's patience only seemed to thin out after each infraction.
And now that word "reassignment" had been spat in her face.
She could only hug the rainbow monkey tighter.
"Kuki?"
Kuki squeaked, the accented voice startling her. She looked around, leaning off the bench curious as to where the call came from. Finally, she looked to her left, seeing an exhausted looking boy heading her way.
"Kuki Sanban?" he said again and she had to suppress a giggle at his British accent. He took off his sunglasses, squinting his eyes before they lit with recognition. "It is you, isn't it? It's me, Nigel. Nigel Uno? We went to pre-school and the Tiny Tot's toddler summer camp together?"
Kuki frowned, tilting her head as he combed through her memory.
Suddenly, she smiled. "Oh! Hi, Nigel! I remember you; you were the kid that was being a mister mopey-pants in the sandbox."
The boy, Nigel, frowned. "Everyone was laughing at me because my accent sounded funny."
"Aw, you didn't sound funny, silly," Kuki giggled. "I didn't laugh at you, and we made gihugic sand-castles every day after snack-time."
"After you always made quick work of my cookies, I might add," he said, though his look was softer and no fire in his accusation. "I must say, I'm surprised to see you here. You're in the Kids Next Door?"
"Yessiree! I'm…" her voice trailed off as her eyes wandered up. She quickly fumbled, shrinking away and looking at anything but Nigel. "I-I'm, uh, a nurse here. My codename is, er, Numbuh 3. Yeah, that's it."
Nigel rose a brow. "Something wrong?"
"What? Nooo," she awkwardly played off, twirling a finger in her hair. Realizing what she was doing, she instantly stopped and hid her hands behind her back. "What could possibly be wrong? Is something wrong, Get Better Soon Rainbow Monkey?" She then lifted her doll, hiding her face behind it as she muffled her voice. "Nope, nothing the matter here, Numbuh 3. Everything is a-okay."
Nigel blinked, the girl acting odder than he remembered. He went to scratch his head, then stopped as he suddenly pieced it together. "Ah. It's the baldness, isn't it?"
"Where did it all go!?" Kuki shot up, taking him by surprise as her hands fumbled around his scalp. "It's all gone! What happened? Did you get a bad hair-cut? Did you get into a lawn-mower accident?" She gasped then pulled him close. "Nigel Uno, are you hanging out with the wrong crowd? You shaved your head to impress them, didn't you? Don't you lie to me, mister."
"I did nothing of the sort," Nigel said as he swatted her away. "Let's just say I had a bad run-in with some spoiled brats and leave it at that."
"Are they bad guys?"
"Oh they're a delightful bunch," he grumbled. At her confused look, he sighed and waved it off. "It's in the past, I guess. It got me where I am today, so whatever."
Kuki only nodded. Her mind buzzed with topics to bring up with her old friend. However, she suddenly panicked, and jumped up and started pushing Nigel down the hall.
"Owowowow! Kuki, what in blazes-"
"You can't be here!" she shout-whispered as she scoured the hall for a broom closet. "You gotta hide. This is a super-extra-secret Kids Next Door base! Only operatives are allowed here."
"I know," he said as he wiggled out of her grip. "I'm in the Kids Next Door too! I'm Numbuh 1, the new leader of Sector V."
"Oh," was all Kuki could really say. After a moment, she went back to smiling. "So what brings you here today?"
"Needed to drop off some paper-work and decided to come myself in order to visit a friend. I figured she could use some company." He then groaned, rubbing his arm as his weariness caught up with him. "Also could use some patching up myself. Stumbled across the Proper Patrol not too long ago and wasn't prepared."
"I have just the thing," Kuki said as she forced Nigel into a sit. She then whipped around, producing a first-aid-kit and took the boy's arm as she began inspecting it. She rubbed her chin, nodded, then slapped an oversized bandage on it. "That should make your boo-boo all better!"
"Uh, thanks," Nigel said as he looked at his arm. He wiggled it around, not sure how he felt about the rainbow monkey face staring back at him.
"You're welcome," Kuki said, positively beaming. She was ever so willing to help and it made her day when one of her patients was on the road to recovery. Suddenly remembering something, she pulled Nigel close as she fumbled in her medic-kit. "Hold on, we have to do this!"
"Uh, do what?" Nigel asked, cheeks flushing with how close Kuki had pulled him in. She then took a device, then held it up above them.
"Say cheese!"
"Ah!" Nigel gasped as the camera went off, and he was reminded why he preferred to keep his sunglasses on at all times. He blinked, the image of Kuki shaking the Polaroid coming into focus. "That's some flash."
"Uh huh!" Kuki nodded, not completely hearing him. Bursting with giddiness, she ushered him close as she hauled out a scrapbook, flipping to the most recent page to find a place for the picture. "Looklooklook, see all my pictures? This one is of my first day here, and this one is my first patient, and –oh THIS one is my favorite!"
Nigel mechanically nodded as she babbled on. Every single picture had a grinning Kuki next to someone who was either smiling, or was surprised to be caught in a sudden photo-op (there was quite a bit of the latter).
With each new page, he found his lips quirking as her attitude began rubbing off on him. "This is a lot of pictures."
"It's so I can remember all my memories," she grinned. She took a moment to catch her breath, then took his hand as she placed it and the photo onto the page. "And now we can remember this one too!"
"Uh, right," Nigel said, slowly retracting his hand as she let go. He looked up to see her just smiling at him. Kuki was always smiling, it seemed. It's how he remembered the girl who always played with him and understood what it was like coming into a foreign country with no new friends. Kuki was simply Kuki, even as a Kids Next Door operative.
Coughing into his hand, he gathered himself as he shifted subjects. "So, you're stationed at the Medical Grove? Impressive. They only accept the best medics here from what I've heard."
"Uh huh!" Kuki said. She gave a twirl, aiming to show off her official nurse uniform in full. She suddenly stopped mid-rotation and pouted. "Except maybe I'm not the best here. Or second best. O-Or third best." She slowly slid down the wall, hugging her knees as she sniffled. "Or the best at anything here, really."
Kuki's emotions were almost infectious and Nigel looked around for something to bring her mood back up. Kuki was always so bubbly and vibrant in pre-school; it'd be an offense not to cheer her up when she needed it.
The girl herself was lost in her thoughts, the harsh criticisms of Numbuh First Aid chipping away at her normally optimistic attitude. Her Get Better Soon Rainbow Monkey was abruptly jiggled in her face, and she looked up to see Nigel trying his best to comfort her.
"Uh, monkey for your thoughts?" he awkwardly said. Kuki, to his relief, gave a small smile and accepted the doll. Pleased with himself, he took a seat next to her. "What's wrong?"
"Everyone here is a big, fat meanie." She let out an indigent huff. "No one is ever nice to me when all I do is try to make everything better! I mean, maybe I sometimes skip my shifts and leave patients alone for too long…and sometimes play with the hamsters when I'm not supposed to, b-but I'm still trying! I really am."
"Well, you're a nurse, Kuki. You have to be a bit more attentive than the normal operative."
"But it gets so boring just staying in a stuffy room all day. My patients think so too! So I sometimes sneak them outside and we pretend to go on super-secret missions. You know, like we thought we were going to get to do." She sighed. "I kind of miss training. The snowball fights were really fun!"
"Yeah, well, not everyone remembers training so fondly," Nigel said, fingering the collar of his turtleneck. "That aside, you shouldn't give up. Things might be boring, but if you keep at it, you'll raise through the ranks here in no time."
Kuki looked off to the side. "I don't think so. Numbuh 1st Aid was super mad this time, and said something about reassignment." She quickly looked at him. "What's reassignment mean? Is it a game?"
Nigel hesitated to answer. "Not exactly."
BOOOM!
The two tensed as the ground shook, an explosion going off somewhere deeper in the compound. Not even a second later and they were covering their airs as klaxon alarms went off and kids everywhere started screaming for their mommies. Kuki then opened one eye, then slowly smiled as she fashioned a theory for the sudden commotion.
"Hooray! A drill!" she said, bouncing up and down. "I love drills! We get to run around, everyone acts so silly, and I get to count all the hamsters when it's over!"
Nigel did not share her enthusiasm. "Something tells me this isn't a drill."
"Run for your lives!" They both stopped to see a frantic nurse high-tailing down the hall. "The Common Cold's here! He's gonna cover us in germs and give us cooties!"
Nigel's eyes widened at the mention of the villain. Face filling with purpose, the boy stood his full height as he grabbed Kuki's arm. "Come on, Numbuh 3. We need to go!"
"Right now?" she asked as she was pulled along. "Is this part of the drill?"
Between the alarms, chaos, and operatives wetting themselves, Nigel found it nearly impossible to navigate to the epi-center of the explosion. Had Kuki not been at his side, he would have wound up walking off the side of the balcony for all he knew.
After what seemed like a never ending maze, the fledgling nurse and greenhorn sector leader kicked down the door to the command center. As the dust settled, Kuki gasped at what she saw while Nigel snarled.
A large, four legged machine clambered around the chamber, smashing several terminals and firing mucus in every direction. Several kids began limping away to escape, but were sucked into the machine by a vacuum attached to its underbelly.
Nigel watched as two kids were sucked through the tubing, eventually being deposited in the machine's clear glass abdomen. Inside he saw dozens of his comrades sloshing around in a pool of snot and phlegm.
Behind him, Kuki gagged and he felt a bit uneasy himself.
"You're better off not fighting it, kids," said the stuffy voice from within the cockpit. The Common Cold grinned (in between coughing fits and sneezes) and laughed as he added more children to his sick collection. "The more you exert yourself, the worse your conditions get; which only makes me stronger! A-Ah," he wheezed as he massaged his neck. "Sore throat. Should probably tone down the yelling."
"I'm only going to say this once, you contaminated freak," Nigel said, making his presence known as he reequipped his shades. "Let those kids go, or I'll give you a real reason to go to the hospital!"
"I don't think you're in a position to make demands of me," the man said. "I'm calling the shots here now!"
"There's nothing but untrained cadets and injured operatives here, you monster," Nigel seethed. "Just like a retched adult to hurt kids while they're down!"
"Hurting them? Oh no, I'm not hurting them: I'm harvesting them." With a flip of a switch, more kids were sucked in, and he revealed in the fury rolling off of Nigel. "With the hefty supply of sick operatives your Medical Grove has so generously donated, I'll have enough infection to sicken every brat in the world! Soon, the Common Cold will be unstop-Ah-unstop-Ah-ahhhh-ACHOO!" He sneezed, a fair amount of snot coating the inside of his cock-pit. "Ugh, you know what I mean."
"Oh, I know what you mean. I also know that since the Grove is low on defenses, you thought you could just walk in here and do as you please. Well, not-so-sorry to say, there's one thing you neglected to account for."
"What's that?"
Nigel whipped out his SPLANKER and leaped towards the Common Cold. "Me!"
"Oh, and here I thought it was something important!" The machine swiped with one of its legs for emphasis, Nigel having to roll underneath to dodge the impact. The boy, however, rolled into Common Cold's direct line of fire, and squealed as he narrowly avoided a snot blast. "You're no good to me healthy, baldly. Seems like I need to un-freshen you up a bit!"
While Nigel put himself into the fray, Kuki teetered about, having no idea what to do in this situation. Should she jump in and help? All operatives were trained with basic combat skills, even if some never used them. Should she run away and find actual help? There were a few security guards here, even if they were completely understaffed.
Or, one security guard, the more she thought about it.
Come to think of it, all that kid did was sit around and eat jelly donuts.
Jelly donuts he never once shared with her!
You know what? She wouldn't go find that guard for help. He was a jerk.
Kuki shook her head. It was because of jerks like that guy that made them so vulnerable to attacks in the first place.
Wait, who was attacking them again?
"Oh yeah! The Common Cold…uh oh."
"Get down!"
Kuki was tackled to the ground as someone knocked her over. She frowned; that wasn't very nice. However, she peaked over the girl's shoulder and saw the massive glob of snot that was where she was standing a second ago.
She took that back; that was very nice of the girl. She looked up, and smiled. "Hi, Numbuh 86."
"Would ye be quiet and stay down?" Fanny hissed as she rolled over, making sure to keep Kuki low to the ground. The red-head watched Nigel's battle with the Cold, and she snorted. It was a good thing her transfer request hadn't gone through yet, or else the mangy boy would be the one taking up all the credit. Though with how badly the fight was going, she was beginning to wonder if there was going to be any credit handed out at all.
Kuki watched amazed as Nigel did series of jumps, kicks, and punches mid-air against the machine. Following him was like watching a dancing pin-ball and it nearly drove her dizzy. "Is Nigel winning?"
Fanny scoffed. "That boy winning? Don't be stupid."
Nigel panted as he landed, then jumped away with barely any time to recover. Sweat dripped down his face and he groaned as he avoided another massive snot blast. He was hardly prepared for the Proper Patrol earlier; how the crud was he supposed to kick the Common Cold's butt too?
That thought drew his attention to the abdomen keeping the kids hostage. He noted with interest that as the adult loaded up another snot-blast, the fluids in the abdomen shifted and ran through the tubes. Nigel smirked. This fight suddenly turned into one massive video-game and he just found the boss' weak-spot.
A weak-spot he intended to exploit the heck out of.
He waited for the Common Cold to fire, then moved as the snot left the cannon. He bobbed and weaved around the legs, jumping into the air with an added flourish as he aimed his SPLANKER down to bust the abdomen wide open.
"Oh no you don't."
Crud.
Nigel saw stars as he was smacked away, barely registering his ungraceful landing. He held his head, and a blurred face appeared over him. His vision began clearing, and the light circled the girl's head like a halo. For a second, Nigel thought he was about to see an angel.
He was more than a bit disappointed when he found out it was just Numbuh Eighty-Six.
"Fanny."
"Stupid."
"Nice to see you too," Nigel said, Fanny only giving him a saccharine smile in return. Rolling his eyes, he pushed her aside as he sat up. "Loser hit me with a cheap-shot."
Fanny crossed her arms. "A real operative woulda seen it comin' a mile away. But what can ye expect from a boy?"
"Oh shut up," Nigel said as he motioned towards the machine. "I had him right where I wanted him!"
"Really?" Kuki spoke up, garnering Nigel's attention. "Then why were you running so close to him? Were you going to try and give him a hug? I don't think that's a good idea, Nigel. You could get sick!"
"I wasn't going to hug him, I was going to beat him!" He then pointed to the abdomen. "That snot-filled fish-bowl is its weak-point. Bring it down, then he goes down too."
Fanny bristled. "Gee, musta taken a lot a brain power to figure that one out, genius!"
"I don't see you doing anything, miss I'm-going-to-be-on-the-decomissioning-squad-so-I-think-I'm-better-than-everyone!"
"Only because it's true!"
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"Guys?"
"WHAT!?"
Kuki flinched at Nigel and Fanny, then meekly pointed towards the Common Cold.
They both looked up.
Well, he was certainly not that uncomfortably close to them a minute ago.
"Whine on your own time," the Cold said as he fired another mucus blast. Acting quickly, Fanny pushed Nigel and Kuki out of the way, only to be caught in the gunk herself. The machine sucked her in, then turned to the last ones in the room. "I've got noses to clog and germs to spread!"
"Uh, Ni-I mean, Numbuh 1?" Kuki said peeking out from behind the boy. "What are we gonna do?"
Nigel brought up his fists. "New plan."
He then grabbed Kuki's wrist and booked it.
"RUN AWAY!"
Kuki found herself being dragged along, and was oblivious to Nigel's state of panic as they ran. "Good plan! What's next?"
"Getting the crud out of here!" Nigel yelped, taking ragged breaths. The door was right there, they were so close.
But not close enough, for as soon as they reached the exit, a barrage of snot and mucus cut them off.
Nigel and Kuki blinked, the fact they were so totally doomed slowly sinking in. Kuki looked to Nigel with a hesitant smile. "Plan B?"
"How about surrendering? On second thought; don't. It brings me joy to see you kids squirm," the Cold said. There was a devious look in his eyes as his sights locked onto the duo. "If only I had a way to treasure this moment forever."
Kuki saw Nigel trying to keep a brave face, but she could see him trembling with each step the Cold took towards them. Hating to see her friend so scared, she clenched her eyes shut, willing her brain to think of something.
Wait. She opened her eyes as the Cold last words registered. She then looked to her medic-kit.
That might work.
"Then I have just the thing," she said. Her cheery sing-song voice caught the man off guard, which gave her just the time she needed to whip out her camera. "Say cheese!"
SNAP
"AH! MY EYES!" The Common Cold cried as he rubbed at his puffy pupils. "I'm sensitive to harsh light you no good-huh?" He looked down to see the brats had disappeared. Growling, he swung around the room. "Where did you two go!?"
Across the room, Kuki poked her head over a fallen medical trolley. She ducked as he looked her way, then glanced over to Nigel as the Cold moved on.
"I don't think we can hide here forever," she whispered. "What do we do?"
Nigel was still shaking. "W-We…w-we should…we should, um…"
"Nigel?"
"I don't know, okay!?" he snapped. She flinched, but then gasped as she noted the subtle wetness behind his shades. "I don't know what to do. I don't know how to be a leader, what was Abby thinking?" Before she could ask who this Abby was, he shrunk into himself. "I've only been doing this for a month, and she's always been there to hold my hand. I'm completely useless without her. We're going to lose, Common Cold will make everyone sick, and I-I'm too scared to do anything. Be a cool KND operative-I can't believe I was so stupid to think I could-"
He stopped as a finger pressed against his lips. Its owner slowly withdrew it and he looked up shocked to see Kuki's firm expression.
"Now what did I tell you about being a mopey-pants?" she said. "Don't be upset, Nigel. That doo-doo head hasn't won yet. We can find a way to beat him, I know we can."
"How do you know?"
"Because you're Numbuh 1," she said with a smile. "You said you were the leader, right? Well I bet my first Rainbow Monkey you're the leader because this Abby person believed in you. And I believe in you too, silly!" She took a moment to give him a hug, patting his back. "You'll think of something and we'll win, okay?"
"O-okay," Nigel said as Kuki withdrew. He looked down at his hands, her words filling him with a new fire. Frowning, his face became serious as his hands tightened into fists. "You're right! This is no time to sulk about. We need to come up with a plan." Kuki cheered him on as he looked around the side. "I just know if we can destroy that abdomen, we'll have him beat."
"But you tried that, remember?"
"Yes, but last time he saw me coming." He recoiled his head, his hand scratching his chin as he analyzed his options. "I'd try to take him by surprise, but he'll see me coming a mile away with this flimsy cover." He groaned, the last piece of the puzzle not fitting the way he wanted it to. "If only we could distract him."
"Distract?"
"Yes, distract." She blinked and he elaborated. "You know, draw his attention? Keep him busy while the other moves in for the kill?"
"Oh." Her tongue jutted out as she thought to herself for a second. "I have an idea!"
"You know what? To heck with hide and seek!" The Common Cold fumed. "I'll just coat this entire place with enough grime to bring down a hippo and flush you out!"
"Flush? Do you need to go to the bathroom?"
He blinked, turning his machine around to see the raven haired nurse standing there.
She smiled and waved at him. "Because I can show you where the bathroom is!"
The Cold chuckled. He couldn't believe how stupid these brats were. "That won't be necessary. Now, any last words before I introduce you to a world of influenza?"
"Yeah," Kuki said, frowning as she tilted her head. "Why are you doing that?"
The Cold paused. "Doing what?"
"That," she said motioning towards the machine. "Why are you sucking up my friends?"
"Weren't you paying attention? What am I saying? Of course you weren't," he said with a sniffle. "I using them as fuel for my machine."
"Why?"
"To make them sick."
"Why?"
"So I can make other kids sick."
"Why?"
"Because that's my thing!"
"Why?"
"B-Because I'm the Common Cold!" he ranted, his eye twitching under strain. "Making kids sick is, you know, what I do!"
"But why do you do it? Being sick isn't very fun."
"I know it's not fun! It's not supposed to be fun! It's supposed to stop you brats from having fun! I should know; I'M SICK TOO!"
Kuki scratched her head. "Do you like being sick?"
"NO!"
"Then why do you make other people sick?" she said, crossing her arms and giving him a scolding look. "You should know better, mister. Making other people sick is not nice, especially if you know how it feels."
"Uh, well." He faltered at that. "I…I'm, uh, I'm always sick! Yeah, that's it! I'm always sick, so why should everyone else get to be healthy and have fun? I have to look out my window every day and watch you kids play outside when I can't step out the door without my sinuses imploding. It's not fair!" He began throwing a tantrum, his machine legs stomping on the floor. "It's not fair! It's not, it's not, it's not!"
"Well, I'm sorry you're always sick," Kuki said. "But that doesn't mean you get to be a meanie to everyone else."
"So what? If I want to make everyone else sick, then I can because I'm older than you so nah!" he said as he blew her a raspberry. "Besides, you know what they say; misery loves company."
"Who's Misery? Are they a friend of yours?"
"Wha-no! It's an expression, you moron!"
"Oh, I get it! Like the stuff my dad drinks?"
"NO! THAT'S ESPRESSO!" he yelled. He slumped on his terminal, the bickering giving him a splitting headache. "And I'm going to need a lot of it once I'm done with you."
"I think you should take some medicine instead."
"Ha! There's no medicine that can combat me!" He reared his machine, focusing all of his snot-cannons on the little girl before him. "You don't get it do you? I'm disease itself!"
Kuki looked beyond the Cold in his cockpit and gave a cheeky smile. "Then it's a good thing I'm a nurse, silly-head, because I've got just the thing you need."
"Oh yeah? What's that?"
"Ahem."
The Common Cold blinked, swerving around in his seat. Kuki made a break for it, but the Cold was far more concerned about the bald boy standing on his snot-abdomen.
"Hello, disease," Nigel said with a lazy wave. He then motioned to his SPLANKER. "Meet the cure."
The Common Cold could only scream as Nigel fired his SPLANKER. The plank cracked against the glass and the boy used the force to propel himself away. The weapon sent powerful vibrations throughout the entire machine, and the adult fumbled to find the eject switch as all his alarms began going off. Right when he was about to jump out, the abdomen gave way and busted wide open.
Nigel and Kuki huddled close to the wall as a wave of mucus spilled out over the command deck. Once the slimy tidal wave subsided, all that remained were the groaning and coughing operatives whom had been released from their icky confines.
Without its power supply, the Cold machine's gave a hacking cough before falling over.
It was at that moment the ceiling caved in and children in high-tech armor swarmed in from above.
"Kids Next Door, Battle Stations!" shouted Supreme Leader Numbuh Two Seventy-Four as he landed, his elite Moonbase defense force behind him. Chad cocked his blaster as he trudged through the mucus, ordering his comrades to tend to the sick and wounded while he stalked upon the fallen machine. "Stay frosty people!"
"N-Numbuh 274, sir!" Chad looked to see a boy stumbling around the corner. The bald scalp and sunglasses gave him away and Chad instantly recognized the boy as he went into a tight salute. "Numbuh 1 of Sector V reporting for duty, sir!"
"At ease," Chad said. Nigel let out a gust of breath as he relaxed his posture. Chad looked beyond the boy and whistled at the debris behind him. "What in the name of peanut brittle happened here?"
While Nigel reported to his superior, the Common Cold slowly crawled away. He used the chaos and mucus to cover his trail and smirked as he noticed he was nearly home free. All he had to do was sneak out the door, go over the balcony and-
-a sneaker landed in front of him and he looked up to see the bane of his existence.
"You should be in bed, mister," Kuki tutted with a wag of her finger. "Nurse's orders."
"I wanted the freak out of my sight yesterday!" Numbuh First Aid growled as the Moonbase guards carted the Common Cold away. Once she saw them load the villain onto the ship, she turned to face her Supreme Leader. "Thank you for responding, sir."
"No problem," Chad nodded. He then crossed his arms and turned to smirk down at the bald boy not too far away. "Though the fight was over before we showed up. Nice work there, kid."
Nigel smiled as he soaked in Chad's praise. "Just doing my job, sir."
"One problem."
"Uh, what?"
Chad smirked. "You didn't save any for me."
"Oh! Well, I'll be sure to keep that in mind next time, sir." Nigel gave an awkward laugh before turning to the girl at his side. "Though I couldn't have done it without Numbuh 3's help."
"Aw, it's okay," Kuki smiled, hugging her doll to her chest as she swayed about. "It was super fun!"
Chad's smirk fell at that. "Yeah, well sadly this is where the not-so-fun stuff starts. Numbuh 1st Aid, I want you all moved out to location beta-nine before sundown."
"Aye, sir," she saluted. His part over, Chad left, leaving First Aid to sigh. "I was hoping we could just scramble his brains. Great."
Kuki was not following. "Um, what did he mean by that?"
"He was talking about moving the Medical Grove," Fanny answered. She joined the group, managing to keep her demeanor despite her obvious illness. "We've been compromised, so now we need to move the base somewhere so the Common Cold can't let all the other villains know where our most vulnerable base is." She then suddenly reared on Nigel. "Which we wouldn't have to do if it wasn't for YOU!"
Nigel bristled under the accusation. "You're pinning this on ME!?
"What are ye, a parrot?" Fanny said. "It obvious ye were too stupid to cover your tracks on the way over here and ye lead the loser right smack dab to our base!"
"That's absurd! I did no such thing!"
"He's right, Numbuh 86," First Aid interrupted before things got out of hand. "The science nerds managed to discover that the Common Cold found us by tracing unregistered, out-bound calls."
"Out-bound calls?"
"Yeah, some idiot was making calls to the Rainbow Monkey Hotline every other night and he used the signal to find us!"
As she mentioned that, Fanny's mouth suddenly snapped shut and only Nigel and Kuki noted her becoming a lot more sheepish all of a sudden.
"Y-you don't say," Fanny stuttered. "S-So what happens now?"
"Now we just need to open the records and find out who made those calls," First Aid said with a snarl. "And I'm going to show them what happens when they endanger MY hospital just to talk to some stupid monkey!"
Fanny began biting her nails. "Oh no…"
Nigel was able to piece it together before First Aid, but crossed his arms and said nothing. He'd let whatever happened next happen; it was none of his concern.
Kuki, however, looked sadly at Fanny. Fanny was the only other nurse here that was nice to her, partly out of their mutual love for Rainbow Monkeys. The redhead, however, grew tired of being a medic and spent weeks getting the approval to be transferred to the Moonbase to be part of the decommissioning squad.
She was so happy when she found out she had been accepted into the program. While Kuki would pretty much be losing the only other person she could talk to between shifts, she was happy for the girl too.
Only now if First Aid found out about Fanny's calls, she could kiss those dreams goodbye.
After looking at Fanny, the girl practically ready to break into tears at her screw-up, Kuki decided that it only seemed right that the one with the most experience with First Aid's anger take the heat.
"Um, ma'am?" Kuki shyly spoke up. "Do you mean the Rainbow Monkey Hotline where you get to talk to a real rainbow monkey?"
"Yeah, that's the one," the head-nurse answered as her hands went to her hips. Suddenly, her face snapped up as she looked at Kuki then at the doll in her hands. After a moment, her eyes narrowed as she glowered at the young operative. "How would you know?"
"Because," she started. She looked over to Fanny and Nigel, the former paralyzed at the fact she was about to be found out and the latter raising a curious eyebrow. "Because I'm the one who called them."
Nigel's eyes widened. "Wha-"
"WHAT!?" First Aid exploded, and Nigel and Fanny actually took steps back while Kuki trembled as she stood in place. "You made those calls? Do you have any idea what you did!?"
"Yes," she quietly answered. "I-I'm really, really sorry."
"Sorry? You lead one of the most dangerous adult villains to a place of healing and nearly got us all killed and you're sorry!?" Numbuh First Aid was heaving now. "I-I'm actually surprised that I'm not surprised. Of course it would be you!"
"Wait!" Fanny tried to butt in. "She didn't-"
"Quiet, 86," First Aid hissed, her eyes never leaving Kuki. "This is the last straw, Numbuh 3. You keep missing your shifts, you constantly get distracted, and now this? I've tried being patient and I've had enough! Do you have any idea how serious this is? You can get decommissioned for this kind of disregard."
"That's not fair!" Nigel finally said. He desperately wanted to tell the truth, but knew Kuki would never forgive him if he squandered what she was trying to accomplish. "She hasn't been an operative that long to understand. Besides, she helped save our butts!"
Numbuh First Aid closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Which is why I won't have you decommissioned, Numbuh 3. I suppose I owe you that much for at least fixing your mistake." There was an obvious air of relief, but it dissipated as the head-nurse frowned. "But I want your quarters cleaned out, uniform returned, and bags packed."
Kuki blinked away tears despite it all. "W-Why?"
"Because you no longer work at the Medical Boo-Boo Grove. By this time tomorrow you will be reassigned and report to your new post, wherever the crud that is." She gave a curt nod, turned to leave, and finally departed after saying, "That's the best I can do for you at this point."
That left Nigel, Kuki, and Fanny alone. Even though she expected punishment, Kuki hugged her rainbow monkey for dear life as she tried to hold back her tears. Fanny walked up to the girl, having no idea how to rightly respond.
After a moment, she finally said, "Why did ye do that? Don't ya know how much trouble ya coulda got in? How much trouble you did get in?"
"She's right, Kuki," Nigel said. "I know there's having your teammate's back and all, but that was unnecessary. You didn't do anything wrong!"
"I know," Kuki said. She then managed to wipe away her tears and smile. "But it's okay. I couldn't let my rainbow monkey sister get in trouble for just wanting to talk to a rainbow monkey. There so adorable and nice and always make you feel better! …even if it costs a dollar seventy a minute per call."
Fanny cared not for the gaping hole in her wallet as she sniffled, never believing someone would stick their neck out for her like that. "But you got reassigned…"
"Well, Numbuh First Aid talked about doing that earlier anyway, so I thought what's the worst she could do besides that?"
"Decommission you?"
"Okay, so I didn't consider that…" Kuki slowly laughed as she shifted her foot. "But it's fine." She looked to Nigel. "Um, I guess reassignment means I gotta go work for someone else?"
Nigel nodded.
"Okay." Kuki then turned to Fanny and extended her arms. "Friendly rainbow monkey goodbye hug?"
"Thank you, Kuki," Fanny said as she returned the gesture. As she pulled away, she took the girl's hand. "A-And I promise I'll make it up to ye. I'll be working on the Moonbase soon and I know Numbuh 362…kind of. But I'll get a good word in for ya and make sure you get placed in a good sector!" She then looked away as her face crinkled. "Eh, though it might be tricky getting someone to take the person who leaked the location of a secret base. Well, you didn't, but you know…"
"I understand. I think." Kuki then turned to Nigel, moving to hug the boy as well. "It was really nice seeing you again, Nigel. I hope we get to see each other again someday. And maybe even have a picnic too! That would be nice."
Nigel slowly returned the gesture, though not totally absorbed in it as his mind began wandering. He thought back on the fight, how Kuki was willing to follow his command even when he wasn't sure of himself. Though she was rather odd in her methods, she knew how to get the job done.
That was something he could admire in an operative.
"We may meet each sooner than you think. Well, maybe not for a picnic, but still." He pulled away, ignoring her confused expression as he looked to Fanny. "You said you could put in a good word for her, yes?"
"Aye," Fanny nodded. It didn't take long for her to piece together his game, and she sneered as she jabbed a finger in his chest. "Oh no! Ye really have lost your marbles if you think I'll ask 'em to put her there!"
"You said it yourself; it'll be hard to find someone to take an operative with her kind of rep." His gaze got intense as he glared. "A rep that should belong to a certain someone I won't name aloud."
Fanny growled. "Nu uh! I ain't doing it. She deserves better. WAY better than that!"
"Oh come on!" Nigel throw his arms up. "You know I wouldn't ask if I wasn't serious."
Fanny frowned, not budging an inch and Kuki was just confused. She became even more confused when Fanny started smirking. "Say please."
Nigel shook his head. "I beg your pardon?"
"Ye heard me."
"Ugh, fine!" He crossed his arms and pouted as he mumbled.
"Louder."
"…mmhm…"
"Ye can do better than that."
"Agh! Please?"
"With sugar and cherries on top?"
"You've got to be-please with sugar and cherries on top?"
Fanny grinned. "Now admit that girls are smarter, stronger, and all around better operatives than boys. Especially yourself."
Nigel gave her a flat stare. "Don't push it."
"Spoil-sport." Fanny rolled her eyes. "I'll do it-but you'll owe me and don't ye forget it!"
"I'm sure you won't hesitate to remind me," Nigel grumbled. Fanny began walking away, blowing her nose, and Nigel adjusted his glasses as he paced off, motioning for Kuki to follow. "Come along, Numbuh 3."
"I don't get it?" Kuki said as she fell in step behind him. "Where are we going?"
"Well look who finally decided to show up," Abby said as she leaned against the railing. She watched Nigel walk down the plank and smirked as she teased his tardiness. "And here Numbuh 5 thought you decided to take a vacation or something."
"Numbuh 1 taking a vacation?" Hoagie said as he came up. He smiled as he wandered up to Nigel and patted his back. "Now that's funny!"
"Hardy har har," Nigel stoically said as he peeled Hoagie's hand away. "Had bit of trouble at the Grove, but things sorted themselves out. Now I have an important announcement; where's Numbuh 4?"
As if summoned, Wally stomped out onto the deck, grumbling obscenities under his breath as he sloshed about, covered head-to-toe in sticky soda.
Nigel slowly rose a brow and turned to Hoagie for an explanation.
"Uh, yeah, so we were having some, uh, let's call 'em electric troubles," the lights flickered as he spoke, "and good ol' Numbuh 4 here took it upon himself to go negotiate with our furry friends on strike in the power core."
Nigel then looked skeptically at Wally. "And how did that go?"
Wally grit his teeth together. "I hate hamsters."
"…anyway, I have some very important news team, so I'm glad you're all here. The quicker we get this over with, the smoother the transition."
Abby popped a piece of gum into her mouth. "This wouldn't happen to have anything to do with why you're late, would it?"
"You could say that." Nigel then clasped his hands behind his back, and side-stepped as he allowed his guest to exit the ship.
The rest of sector V watched as a raven hair girl bounced onto the deck, the sleeves of her over-sized green sweater toting large purple suitcases cases. She dropped the luggage then waved excitedly.
Wally found himself staring a bit longer than he cared to admit and covered his embarrassment by harshly asking, "Who the crud is she?"
"Team, meet our new Diversionary Tactics Officer and Medical Specialist," Nigel calmly introduced with a smile. "Numbuh 3."
"Hi, new teammates. We're all gonna be super best friends, I know it!"
Suddenly, the ship groaned as a wave of stuffed animals and dolls burst from the pod-door. Kuki managed to avoid the wave, but the other four yelped as they were buried in an avalanche of fluff.
"Um, oopsie," Kuki sheepishly giggled as four heads popped out from the field of dolls. "I think I packed a teeny, tiny bit too much. Wait!"
The four yelped as Kuki joined them in the fluffy pile, the operatives tumbling as they amassed in the center. Kuki only giggled, motioning for them to look up as she held her camera.
"Say cheese!"
end transmission