Growing up, Lance had the best mother a boy could hope for. She was loving, supportive, and always praised him when he'd done something well. "Good job, Lance!" she'd say. Or, "This is really good!" Even when he didn't do so well, she was never harsh, but would say things like, "Better luck next time," or, "Maybe pay better attention." There was never a disappointed, "Lance, you've done it again," or a sarcastically surprised, "I never knew someone could screw this up!" His mother never said those things. Ever.

When he tried out for soccer in the seventh grade and came home sobbing because he didn't make it, his mother didn't tell him to "grow up," nor did she make any loud statements from the next room over about how Lenny's kid ("You know, the guy I work with.") had done so much better, how Lenny's kid had made it to the team and how proud Lenny must have been. Oh, no. She didn't do that. She made him his favorite dinner and let him eat half a pint of ice cream. She let him watch cartoons instead of her favorite cooking show, and told him that it didn't matter if he wasn't picked for the team because he was good at plenty of other things. She was great.

Or rather, she is great. She isn't gone yet. At least, he hopes she isn't. He wouldn't know if something happened to her; there's no one around to tell him whether she's okay or not. She might think he's dead, now. How long has it been since he last saw her?

He tries to not think about it.

Instead, he thinks of the family he has now. Allura is sort of their mom? She's the female leader who keeps them all safe, but she's also super attractive, so…he'll just have to come back to her. And Coran is like the weird great-uncle, while Shiro is the protective...older cousin? Those exist, right? Hunk and Pidge are the siblings he never had, he supposes. All one happy, weird, big family. No, wait, he's forgotten Keith.

Keith.

He can be...the weird distant cousin who doesn't talk to anyone at the family reunion? No, too specific. Lance hasn't even gone to a family reunion before. Oh, wait. He has a much better idea. No, no, Keith is still part of their weird family. Somehow. Is he the stepbrother? What were those like, anyway?

A door opens, and Lance, pulled from his thoughts, looks up to see Keith walk in. Well, think of the emo prince.

"Oh, I guess I'll go somewhere else, then," Keith says upon noticing Lance. At least he isn't overly rude about it.

"Before you go, can you help me out with something?" Lance asks, crawling from the couch space set in the floor.

A moody sigh. "What?"

"Okay, so, would you consider yourself like a weird, distant, twice-removed cousin, or a stepchild, or what?" Lance asks. "'Cause I was thinking about how we're all like a huge family, and I've got most of it figured out, but I'm not sure where exactly you'd fit in. I was thinking of something more along the lines of 'neighbor's kid,' but I'm not too sure about that one."

"How about I just be a normal first cousin?" he answers.

"No, you can't be that. Shiro's got that covered."

"What? I thought Shiro would be the dad."

Lance shrugs. "I don't know. Doesn't seem like too much of a dad to me."

"What are you talking about? Of course he'd be the dad," Keith argues. "He keeps our heads in the game and is great at leading us."

"Okay, that's a really weird way to describe anybody," Lance replies. "If anything, he's just a...protective older cousin type of thing."

At what point does it stop being a petty argument and transform into something higher, something more serious and meaningful? Is it when personal feelings get involved, or does that make it even more petty?

"Do you even know what a dad is? They take care of their family and keep them safe from harm, just like Shiro tries to do for us," Keith states.

"You're only saying that because you're his favorite!" Lance throws at him.

"I am not!"

"You are! 'Keith, good job on that not-really-important thing you just did!'" Lance mimics Shiro, laying a finger over the bridge of his nose and puffing his chest slightly. Then he swipes his hand over his forehead, bringing a clump of hair down. "'Oh, sure thing, Shiro. Always glad to do something for our leader.'"

"Stop that!" Keith yells, shoving Lance. "What is your problem with me?!"

"Me? Why do you have to be better than everyone?!" Lance yells back.

Keith hesitates for a moment, having expected almost anything but that. "What?"

"Oh, like you don't know," Lance says, rolling his eyes. "Who are you even trying to impress? We're in space, a zillion light years from Earth! Is it Shiro? Allura?"

Keith doesn't answer. He's angry, of course, but a small part of him is also hurt. Is that really how they all see him? He doesn't know how to answer Lance. He was just trying to do his best. He isn't given the chance to give any reply, however.

"Ooh, look, I'm Keith!" Lance mocks, not even bothering with the hair effect. This time, he's just fancifully waving his arms in the air. "I'm so cool and I'm great at everything! Hey, everyone! Let's watch me do something and make Lance look like a complete idiot!"

He yells the last word, with his fists clenched by his sides and built-up tension raising his shoulders. He freezes like this for a few moments, only the sound of his breathing and a heavy silence from Keith present in the space between them. In the long seconds that follow, the words echo in the room. They seem to bounce off of the walls and throughout the entire castle.

Funny, how quickly that turned. It certainly doesn't seem petty anymore.

Keith thinks of every time he's been praised for something since Voltron had come into his life. Shiro does seem to spend more time with him than with Lance, but is it really because Keith is his favorite? He certainly isn't some eager-to-please pet. Is he really only trying to impress Shiro?

Lance thinks about what he just said. A tight feeling builds up in his chest and runs up to his throat. It's the same thing he felt when everyone else's child was perfect and wanted and good for something. He doesn't recognize this fact, however; he just knows that it's uncomfortably familiar. There's a sudden flood of emotions that aren't anger, and humiliation establishes itself as the most prominent one.

Keith tries for an apology. "Lance, I-"

"No. You know what? Just- just forget about it. I'm sorry," he says bitterly. He then proceeds to exit the room, very quickly and with his head down.

It doesn't matter. It really does not matter. So he's the friend that they laugh at because he's stupid and makes lame jokes. Who cares if he's the goofy and annoying one? Nobody. Nobody cares. What did he blow up about? It doesn't matter.

Keith will tell everyone and they'll know he is a whining brat and find a new blue paladin and make fun of him because why wouldn't Keith take that chance to make him look bad but it doesn't matter now none of it matters there's no going back he's going to have to leave and

He's at his room. He goes inside. He stays there.

Keith stands outside of Lance's room. It's been less than an hour, perhaps less than thirty minutes, even, but it's felt so much longer. Keith has never been much of one to express his emotions, much less deal with someone else who does. He reaches to knock on Lance's door, and it opens automatically. He winces slightly. Not exactly a good start. Inside, Lance is lying on his bed, and he quite obviously flinches at the sudden noise and light.

"I, uh, I tried to knock," Keith says.

Lance, for once, fails to reply. Is he asleep? No, he definitely moved when the door opened.

"Look, about earlier-"

"I'm sorry," Lance interrupts. His voice is strained slightly from lying on his side. Or maybe it's because he's trying to act civilly towards Keith for once. "I was angry, and you really did not deserve that, so...I'm sorry."

Keith has to admit that he's a little shocked. He figured that Lance would still be, at the very least, a little bitter. Maybe he's just gotten a chance to cool his head in here and was too ashamed to come out and apologize. Keith knew a thing or two about that.

"Just forget about it," Keith says, half-conscious that he's repeating what Lance had said earlier. "I haven't- I'm not going to tell anyone. I get it. I've blown up once or twice, too."

He wishes that he could see Lance's face, know what effect his words were having. It looked like he'd been trying to sleep, he probably doesn't feel much like talking.

"All right, then," Keith says somewhat awkwardly. "I guess I'll see you later."

"Yeah," Lance half-mumbles in reply. As Keith turns to leave, Lance adds, "Thanks. For...yeah. Thanks."

A small smile finds its way to Keith's face. Looks like he didn't do too horribly at comforting. "Sure."

The door closes.

Lance curls further into himself. A small sense of relief washes over him, but it's not enough to dispel all of his negative emotions. At least he knows now that Keith won't tell anyone.

He is such a child. This is something he hasn't done in years. Yelling at someone in misdirected rage and then sulking by himself are things an eight year old would do, not a paladin of the Universe's last hope! He really misses his mother. Keith's attempt to comfort him just isn't the same. It's nowhere close. Is that what this really boils down to? He misses his mommy, so he threw a tantrum and locked himself away?

No. It's more than that. He knows it. Covering over his problems with different ones doesn't fix them. It just gives him more reasons to be upset at himself. He knows what the issue is. Keith isn't really aware of how or why he bothers Lance. It isn't really his fault. That doesn't change the fact that he's an emo jerk both girls and Garrison instructors absolutely adore, of course, but it's not a good reason to have gone off at him, either. No, he's apologized, Keith said he was cool about it, the problem is over now.

He really is tired. Thinking sad and upsetting thoughts doesn't help him go to sleep any faster. He tries to think of other things, instead. More pleasant, yet saddeningly nostalgic thoughts. He wonders about what his mother is doing. Maybe shopping, or baking cookies, or watching a movie. He doesn't know what time it is there. His body tells him it's late in the night, but so much time in space has skewed his sense of Earth-time. Maybe she's fallen asleep on the couch watching an old sci-fi movie, like they used to do together when he was a kid. She'd really get a kick out of his job, now. Lance, Paladin of the Blue Lion, member of Voltron. He could take her into space when he gets back. Show her all of the cool things he's seen. She'd really like that…

And with that thought, he's asleep.