I don't own the Harry potter characters…..but I do own the rest…SUK ON THAT ROWLING!

Ok, here is my story! My sis bettered it up.

…if you review I'll give you an imaginary lollypop.

THE TRAIN RIDE

So I was sitting in an empty compartment at the end of the train, minding my own business and reading my book, eating a chocolate bar and listening to my 'magical Discman', while swinging my feet in time with the spice girls (yes, spice girls, I know they didn't exist yet, but I went into the future and stole a copy), when out of the corner of my eye, I saw the compartment door slide open.

Just when I thought my friends Lily, Amy and Kate were coming to save me from my bordimnesnes (gotta love that word),

I see the marauders, as they call themselves, enter my compartment, acting as though I was not there.

I turned off my 'magical Discman' and decided to give a little cough, seeing they hadn't noticed me their.

"Ah Collins, what a wonderful surprise!" said James, his overly large head wobbling dangerously (not really, but you get the point)

"Don't mean to be rude but do you mind leaving this compartment? Seeing it's reserved for my friends." I said in a sickly sweet voice

"Oh how cute! She still believes in imaginary friends!" said Sirius, him and the rest of them snickering at the joke, (except for Remus who decided not to join in the conversation.)

"Well actually, there not imaginary, and even if they were they still wouldn't be imaginary to me, seeing they'd be my friends and I'd actually think they were real" I said sticking my tongue out

"So how was your holiday Jemma?" asked Remus joining into the conversation

"Not bad, and yours?" I said, making sure that it was obvious that I was being nice to him and not the others.

"Pretty good I guess" answered Remus politely.

They had all taken a seat, Sirius making sure his stinky feet were near my face.

"People, people! I said that you can't sit in here, so can you please leave before I chuck an unidentified object at someone's head!" I said, an evil grin spreading across my face

"You wouldn't chuck anything at my head, Collins. You'd be too scared to ruin my beautiful face." said Sirius winking.

"Actually, I'd be too scared to ruin my beautiful object." I said putting my book down.

"Man, my eyes hurt!" said James looking at me.

"Aw, I'm not really that ugly, am I?" I asked, pouting

"Yes." James replied without hesitation.

"Bitch." I whacked Sirius's foot, which was getting dangerously close to my nose. "Sirius, get your hairy hobbit feet away from me."

"Um… no."

There was an awkward silence, and then I started gagging. "Oh hell no! You did not just do that!" I spat, and started wiping my tongue.

"Right you! That was the last friggin straw!" furiously, I grabbed the nearest object and chucked it as hard as I could.

"Ouchie! Man, that kills!" Sirius grabbed his head, rubbing his nose furiously.

"I told you I knew how to throw things!" I said, flicking my hair triumphantly. Mid flick, I noticed there was something wrong. "Oh no! You broke my CD cover you cow!

"Well, technically you-" Remus began, before

"My poor, beautiful, innocent CD cover! What did it ever do to you?"

"Collins, it's a common fact around the school that you have problems, but do you really need to flaunt it?" James asked.

Jemma stopped her rant immediately. "Fine. Then get out of my compartment, before I start throwing unbreakable objects around.

"Well that's too bad, we don't want to goOWCH! Bloody hell woman! What is your problem?" Sirius rubbed a reddening circle on his forehead, as Jemma caught a big, yellow bouncy-ball.

"Oi, that one was uncalled for." James said defensively, though he was grinning nonetheless. Sirius seemed didn't seem to notice that his friends were actually enjoying this.

"Exactly! I didn't do anything!" Sirius dropped his hand from the big red mark and glared at me.

"Yes you did" I said.

"Really? And what exactly have I done to insult the princess this time?"

"You talked. Directly to me. Guards! Take him away!" and with a flourish of my hand, I put 'Mr. Smiley Face', aka the yellow bouncy ball, away.

Remus laughed. "Oh no, you insulted the Almighty! Run while you still can!"

"Excuse me! I am the Lord of this school. Some petty chick with Spattergroit is not going to tell me what to do!"

"Well excuses m- …say what?"

Sirius grinned. "Spattergroit."

"What the hell is that?" ok, now I was seriously confused.

Sirius laughed. "Aah! 'Tis a most grievous affliction of the skin, young mistress, that will leave you pockmarked, in other words freckly, forever!"

James laughed as well. "The only known cure is to take a toad liver, tie it to your neck, and stand naked in a barrel full of eels eyes, at the full moon!"

Remus sniggered "Just make sure you don't come across any werewolves."

They all had a nice little laugh for a while, before the compartment door slid open again.

"Heya Jemma! Wuss happenin?" asked Amy flicking her straight blondish hair from her face to reveal her brown eyes.

"What are they doing in here?" Lily asked, before I could answer Amy's question (everyone knows what lily looks like, you no green eyes dark red hair blah blah blah yada yada yada.)

"Lily, babe, how are you?" said James winking, before I could answer Lily's question

Lilly pretended she couldn't hear him.

"Ahem, I believe it's time you guys buggered off." I said, looking at James, Sirius and Remus pointedly.

"But we don't wanna lea-"

Sirius stopped halfway through his sentence for some unknown reason, and I caught Mr. Smily Face on the re-bounded. "Ha ha ha! Now your face is symmetrical." I said, as I watched him rub another red circle on the other side of his forehead.

"What was that for?" asked Remus, though he didn't look much like he minded.

"Because his head is too big. And he talked. Directly to me. Again." I said, acting superior to the world.

"Man this compartments boooring." Tapeworm (aka peter) whined. And as James, Sirius and Remus didn't want him to get into one of his crappy, whinny moods, they left.

Lilly, Kate and Amy entered. They sat down. And put their bags Away.

"What was that all about?" asked Kate

"Oh, they randomly decided to have a conversation with me" I replied, "Them and their stupid fat heads, decided I wouldn't care if they soiled my compartment with their presence."

"Sounds fun." said Lily sarcastically

So our little conversation went on for another 20 minuets, before Lily stared ranting on about how James had a big fat head and how he needed to get a life and so on and so forth. She says she hates him, but anyone with half a brain can see that she's completely in for the guy.

"He is soo big headed. I swear, if his head was any bigger, he would overbalance and fall down!" Lilly was getting slightly red in the face now. "I mean I know he's kinda good looking, what with his messy jet black hair, and warm brown eyes that sparkle with mischief. And that cute little dimple he gets under his right eye whenever he smiles…"

She was silent after this. Amy, Kate and I looked at each other, and then quickly looked away, trying not to laugh.

Hope you liked..

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