Touhou vs. Merlin, the Black Knight, and Sir Edritch of Strongheim
HE was a young boy when I first laid eyes upon him
IF I had not known the boys future I would have laughed aloud.
IT was a young day in mid-October and I was walking the young boy back to my home when an evil sorcerer attacked. She said a complicated string of words that I would only realize later had some reference to the boy's future. His future was to be the greatest knight of England, and the greatest king of the century. But, as all great people, he did not start out as anything special. This knock-kneed boy who was as skin and bone barely looked like "king of the century" material, and yet I had to help him, for it was his destiny. He had a noble disposition for such a young lad, and as I laid eyes upon him, it seemed to me that none other should lead our great nation. Though, throughout the land , there were evil things stirring, and so I had to call on the forces of Gensoku, the magical land where lay the Scarlet Devil Mansion and its lords, Remilia and Flandre Scarlet, along with their mage, Patchouli, and their maid, Sakuya Izayoi. They came with great haste to the land of England, e'en though our primitive land lay eons of time away from their own. But thanks to their mage, they got here in less than 3 ticks of the candle.
"We are here, now what do you need Merlin" said Remilia. "Great and powerful Remilia, you have come to our fair isle under a time of sorcery and great evils, and I had hoped that you would have been able to keep them at bay" said Merlin. "Great and powerful we may be, but you must defeat the sorcerers three, for only then shall we achieve victory" said Patchouli. "Be careful Patche, we may need to keep this one in the dark, for he may become the force we have come to fear in our time, be patient and watch, but do not tell him the things that are to come, lest they come quicker than they did last time" said Flandre. "My sister, thou speakest in riddles most foul, this man needeth our help, and who are we to not offer it", said Remilia. "It is true what Patche speaks, my lady, for is Merlin not the evil sorcerer that doth plague us in our time" said Sakuya. "No, it is Nilraem, the king of the dark faeries, and he has not a thing in common with this useless bag of parlor tricks" said Remilia. "You know, I'm right here", said Merlin. "Silence, peasant, or I will silence you" said Sakuya. "I just think that we should get back to the matter of saving the land of England from the terrors of the evil sorcerers three!" said Merlin.
"No matter, they will be gone as soon as I wish, for they are my acolytes, simply sent here because I was bored and wanted to have some fun with my magic, before I went to bed" said Patchouli. "There be only one more problem, wise mage of Gensoku, the Black Knight plagues us, stealing our wives, and ransacking our towns of their precious magic crystals." said Merlin. " The Black Knight is but a figment of your imagination" said Patchouli. "That is enough, I challenge you, mage of Gensoku, to a duel of magic!" shouted Merlin. "Very well, but I warn thee, the side effects will be permanent, and I will not have my maid bandage them." said Patche.
And so the battle began, Sakuya blew a horn, and the ground exploded into two bleachers covered with black silk with red trim. Remilia, Flandre, and Sakuya sat down, and Remilia called the battle to start. Merlin threw a bolt of jagged lightning at Patche, only to have her block it and send a flaming rock back at him. He countered, summoning a wall of blue ice, that shattered and flew towards Patche. Patche used a wall of flames to melt them, but not before one nicked her on the cheek. As she felt the wound trickle warm blood down her face, she called upon the force of FuryFlame, which came in the form of a giant hail of comets which all hit Merlin, knocking him off his feet and pinning him to the ground. Merlin raised his hands, and the comets melted into ore, which he then used to cover Patche. She screamed in pain, and released a flow of healing water. She was revealed to be completely healed. She opened her eyes, revealing them to have turned ozone blue, and turned Merlin to ashes.
"Well, that's going to be yet another thing for me to clean up" said Sakuya. But the battle was not over, Merlin re-formed and shot a tremendous volt of lightning at Patche, that hit her squarely in the chest. She fell back, and moved no more. "Merlin, you will pay" said Remilia. Remilia rose into the air, raised her wings to full out flight mode, raised her hand, and Merlin rose into the air. She opened her eyes, revealing them to be pure crimson red, and a black fireball exploded into her palm, she concentrated, forcing the ball to become the size of the tip of her finger, and placed it on Merlin's forehead. Merlin erupted into flames, and was no more. Remilia descended and breathed on Patche's lifeless form, she opened her eyes and spoke "Thank you , Remilia". The quartet was on their way to Gensoku when a man, clothed in armor as black as ebony, blocked their way. "We are not in the mood" said Sakuya. "I don't really care what mood you are in, you must die, for I am the Black Knight, slayer of women, and taker of magical equipment" said the man. "Sister, may I handle this one?" said Flan. And the knight evaporated into the air, becoming a blackbird. "Very stylish Flan, I see my baby sister has been practicing" said Remilia. "I do so love making blackbirds", said Flan. "Let us go home now", said Sakuya. Upon arriving in Gensoku, they see a masked stranger barring the way to their home. "Sir, we are not amused, get out of our way, or I shall have my sister turn you into a blackbird", said Remilia.
"I am Sir Edritch of Strongheim, and I have come to slay thee in the name of the fallen wizard Merlin." he said. "Flandre, handle him" said Remilia. Flandre waved her hand, and collapsed to the ground. "What have you done to my baby sister!" yelled Remilia. "I have simply taken away her magic", said Edritch. "How dare you!" yelled Sakuya. Sakuya activated her ability to slow time, and Remilia picked up Leveithenn, her sisters sword of power. Remilia slashed the man in two, Sakuya unslowed time, Flandre awoke, and the quartet went home to finally relax and drink that evenings pot of Kwikizari tea.
-FIN-