Hereafter
By Mikayla Gawain
I left the world the way that I lived by it: by the sword.
I knew I was going to hell that day as soon as I saw her face. It was just after she successfully wrestled Lehran's Medallion from my grasp. My insane rampage ended there, she released me from my madness. However, during the struggle, my sword found its way into her breast. I impaled her through the very organ that kept her alive. She bled to death on my sword, I was too shocked to move. There was nothing I could do to save her, and there was nothing I could do to redeem myself.
I needed an eternity in hell, I wanted it. I deserved nothing more. How could I cut a life so pure from the world…
I would never forgive myself.
My sins to the world accumulated even with my death. I left my son and daughter to face the harsh world on their own at such a young age, with only lingering teaching and Titania to guide them. They loved me, but given my worst affliction to life they were better off without me. Not saying I did not love them. No, it was because of them I didn't take my own life that day…
I was glad that I was able to die with at least Ike by my side. That stubborn pup, he almost got himself killed the same night as I. Elena surely was watching over him. But me? I was far too reckless to see what was to happen that night, but it was the perfect end for me.
Death by what I lived by, fought by, and killed by…the sword.
From my last breath, I was certain that I was on my way to hell. Unfortunately, fate had other ideas for me. With Ike as the last thing I saw on Tellius, I passed over into the hereafter.
The hereafter was everywhere, it was no place. It was forever, it was silent. There wasn't a ground or a ceiling, there wasn't an up or down. It just was. It was extremely bright, so much in fact that it was overwhelming. It was like it shined through my soul, cleansing me.
Wait, where was I? This….This wasn't hell. This wasn't terrifying or painful. It was strangely peaceful. But why was I here?
"Gawain, you're such a fool..." a voice said in front of me, a beautiful melodic voice I thought that I would never hear again. I looked around desperately until I saw her. Elena stood there like a haze, smiling at me. I'd seen that smile thousands of times, but this time I truly was able to appreciate its beauty.
"E-Elena…"
"Must I repeat myself once more? I forgave you. It was not your fault-"
"I took you from your children," I said bitterly, collapsing to my knees on nothingness. "I don't deserve your forgiveness."
"You were possessed by darkness; you didn't mean to do it. You're a good man. I still love you."
I could feel the realm try to purify me with Elena's aid. I didn't deserve any of this, but eventually I was going to lose. Elena always won. She would make me find peace with myself.
"Soon I hope you realize that you have an eternity of my forgiveness to look forward to," she said. I looked up at her. She had a mischievous glint in her bright cerulean eyes. Oh, there it was. It dawned on me then that I was going to suffer after all. Yes, I had taken my first step into hell within heaven.
That was my punishment for falling in love with Elena.