Title: Angel Heart
Genre: Romance/Angst
Pairing: Hughes x Roy
Summary: There was always the line between friends, which neither of them dared to cross.
Warnings: Shounen-ai. Spoilers for ep. 25.
Disclaimer: I do not own FMA, nor the wonderful character song Angel Heart sung by Hughes's seiyuu, from which I got the title from, and also the ideas of this story.

Angel Heart (Part I)

Hughes's POV

i. the line between friends

I was scared. I didn't know when it was that my mind had crossed the line between friends. I was in love with him, and that was scary, because I already had a girlfriend. He had millions of girlfriends himself, so many that he couldn't keep count of, not that he could be bothered to do so. I tried to record this data, but failed. He had got to stage when he didn't even bother to tell me about his girlfriends. They were not worth talking about, he decided. None of them he really loved, I guessed. But I couldn't guess why he could still bother to go out with them if he didn't love them, and if he couldn't be bothered to do so many other things already.

The problem was, I loved my girlfriend, even though he didn't love his.

Watching him sometimes, I knew that the feelings I had for him weren't just friends. If they were, then Gracia would be 'just a friend' too. No, I loved him more than I was supposed to, and I was scared.

This was a different type of fear from any that I have known. Before, when I was a young kid, I feared little things in life, like creepy crawlies and bad dreams. At junior school, I feared the teacher telling me off for not handing in my homework in time, or being late for a lesson, or forgetting to bring the correct equipment to class. When I was in military training, I feared that I wasn't good enough to get into the military. During the war, I feared death. Death was sometimes the cost of knowledge, and I feared that I knew too much.

All those fears I could suppress. I could push them deep down into my heart, and only in the night when I was asleep would these fears come and haunt me in the forms of nightmares.

I couldn't get rid of this new fear. It overtook me, and only when I was with him would this fear subdue slightly. When he wasn't near, the fear ate away my heart, and I was hopeless against it. At night, as I lay in my empty bed, I would feel lonely. I tried to picture Gracia next to me, but it didn't quite work. I wouldn't let myself imagine him there. I was scared of what would happen if I did, because somehow I knew, without trying, that he was the only person who could wash away this loneliness.

Once, he fell asleep in the office after working in late hours. I couldn't find him via his home phone, so I went to the headquarters. He was there, his head slumped amidst the piles of paperwork, pen still in hand. I prodded his shoulder, and he didn't wake up, so, gently, I carried him over to the sofa. He was incredibly light. He wasn't as heavy as me, at least, and I decided that I would have to go on a diet. I lay him down, head resting on the arm of the sofa, and from the cupboard I found a small blanket, which I unfolded to cover his profile.

He looked cute, and I smiled. Unable to resist, I leaned down and kissed his forehead, softly. I wouldn't dare to kiss him anywhere else. It felt good, and I wished I hadn't done it, because now I wanted to kiss him again.

I cursed myself. It was only a sign of friendship. I shouldn't desire for more than that. I closed my eyes, because for a moment the pain was too hard to bear, and not having him in my sight relieved the burden a bit.

I left the room, and it was only until I was back in the dark, unlit corridor that I could let my eyes open.

He was my best friend, and nothing more.

ii. the freedom in the rain

The day I told him I was going to marry Gracia, I felt like my heart had been torn apart.

It was my fault. I'd thought about this for many months already. I'd been with Gracia for more than two years now, and I was sure that we loved each other. The image of him always tugged at those thoughts, but I tried to ignore its silent begging for me to put a stop to my relationship with Gracia. It just wasn't possible. Gracia and I were meant for each other.

She was overjoyed when I proposed to her, and for that split second I forgot about him entirely. I was sharing the joy. Then he entered my mind again, and it troubled me, because I'd gone beyond the point where I could turn back. It was too late now to do anything.

I didn't know if I regretted it or not. That was until I informed Roy of the news, of course. I'd pretended to be as enthusiastic as ever, with a big false smile on my face. The words came tumbling out of my mouth, and I couldn't hear what I was saying. He blinked, twice, and there was a small smirk on his face. A smirk, never a smile, as usual. "Congratulations," he said, and that made me hurt more than ever.

I didn't know how he could have not realised that I wasn't really happy. He'd been my best friend for longer than I could remember, and he had always understood me more than anyone else. If he didn't understand me, then no one else would. For the first time, I felt lonely in broad daylight, in his presence.

I invited him to come to the wedding and be my best man. He said he'd think about it, and later, in the middle of the night, I was woken up by the sound of the phone ringing. He agreed to come.

The next day I brought him over to Gracia's to get the two of them properly acquainted. They'd met before, but they'd barely exchanged a few words before he had to leave. He had a taste of Gracia's most wonderful apple pies. He said he quite liked her, but she was not the type of girl he'd go for.

"She's perfect for you."

The weather seemed to feel for me, because when we left it was raining. Both of us didn't have an umbrella. Gracia offered me an umbrella, but I turned her down. He frowned at me. When the door had shut behind us, he hissed at me, "Are you crazy? It's almost hailing here and you refused an umbrella..."

"Who cares?" I said, shrugging carefreely. I liked the feeling of the heavy rain pattering down on me. I couldn't see through my glasses anymore; the lenses were covered in water droplets. I reached for his hand, and I could feel his surprise when I grasped it in mine tightly.

"I can't see," I explained. He obliged and guided me home.

A long time afterwards, I could still feel the lingering warmth of his hand.

iii. the thoughts before death

Strangely, the last thoughts I had as I lay dying was not of my wife and daughter.

I was the infamous family man who annoyed everyone in headquarters with the numerous photographs of his cute little daughter and beautiful wife. Yet all thoughts of them were wiped away from my mind during those final few seconds of my life. There was just the picture of the man with messy raven hair and dark obsidian eyes.

It was a static picture, as if my mind had taken a mental snapshot of him. He was in his military uniform, and there was that arrogant smirk on his face. It was one of the features I loved about him. His everlasting confidence, his airiness.

I could feel the last drop of strength draining out of my body. The pain was departing too.

The picture changed. He was now wearing casual clothes. A blue shirt and scruffy jeans. He was wearing a genuine smile, something so rare it could be listed as one of the seven wonders of the world.

I felt like I was in a different world. I was leaving my own world behind. I knew that I was heading for a better world, but I still wanted to cling onto the world I'd lived in for nearly thirty years. I wanted to hold onto everything I'd had, my job, my family, and, most of all, him.

The picture altered again. This time I was standing with him, smiling brightly too. I was in a red shirt and white trousers, and these clothes were much cleaner than his.

I could see a white light in front of me, growing more brilliant by each passing moment.

Just before the light consumed me, the picture made its last alteration. We were facing each other. Our lips, mine and his, were sealed together, and his head was tilted slightly.

There was an strange joy spreading through me, stronger than any pain.

I was surrounded by the light. This was the end.

Blinded by the glare, I closed my eyes with reluctance, thus releasing my grip on my world.

To be continued in part II...

A/N: This is my first Hughes/Roy fic. I hope it's not too bad. And I did it in Hughes's POV too. He's a character I don't write about too often, so I hope he's not too OOC. (In fact, I don't think he's ever made an appearance in my fics before...) Please read & review to let me know what you think! I might do a companion piece in Roy's POV in the near future if this is successful.

UPDATE
I have decided to do part II as well. I have already written it and it should be uploaded in the next few days or so. The next part will be in Roy's POV, describing pretty much the same events, but the last part is different, because Roy wasn't there when Maes died. And it is also longer than this part. Hope you will enjoy!